by Hattie Jude
He shrugs and smirks at me over his shoulder. I want to cram his lips down his throat. “My dad is smarter than he looks,” he says.
“Right. Well, meanwhile, people seem to still have full access to our houses, despite your amazing alarm system. Mom, we need to get out of here.” I lean in front of her, getting in her face.
“What made you choose Longlake?” Raf leans back on the couch, stretching out his legs and getting comfortable again.
“It’s what Hugh agreed to when we were divorced. He agreed to let us start over, get away from Luke, and he approved of Longlake before she even applied.” Mom fists the material of her shirt and then smooths it out, over and over. “What are we missing?”
I turn to Raf and his bruises look so painful, I wince. The guilt that my father did that to him and he’s still trying to help us figure all of this out is overwhelming. I feel slightly bad for all the hateful thoughts I’ve had about him.
“Did your dad know Luke before he came to work for him?”
“No, he couldn’t have,” Mom says. She turns to me. “Right?”
“If he did, they both lied about it.”
All three of us are quiet then, the implications of this too troubling to voice out loud.
I call Ashton and it goes straight to voicemail. I feel terrible about missing his game, but it’s too dangerous right now. And after Raf got hurt so badly, the thought of putting Ashton at risk is too much to take. I can’t put him or Luci in any danger.
I leave a message.
“Ashton, I’m so sorry. I wanted to come to your game tonight so bad. There are crazy things going on with my family. We had a break-in. I thought I might be able to talk my mom into letting me go this one night, but she’s watching me like a hawk more than ever. I know you’re going to do great and wish I could see you. Call me later and let me know how it went.”
It’s late before Stefen gets home. I hear him come in and am upstairs in the guest bedroom. I’m too tired to go downstairs to hear what he’s saying and when I check my phone, I’m disappointed that Ashton never called. I hope they won.
The next morning, Stefen and my mom are talking outside on the deck when I come downstairs. Raf isn’t around and I wander around the kitchen, unsure if I should make a piece of toast or if that’s too presumptuous since this isn’t my house. There’s coffee and I pour half a cup, not willing to be so polite that I don’t get my coffee.
I check my phone again and there’s a text from Ashton.
Ashton: Hey, I’m really sorry—just saw this a little bit ago. Where are you? I’m at your house.
I’m at Raf’s.
I see dots and then they disappear. A few minutes later, the doorbell rings and I freeze. It rings again as my phone vibrates.
Ashton: I’m at the door. :) You letting me in or what?
I hurry to the door just as Raf is walking down the stairs. He’s shaking his head.
“Don’t answer that.”
“It’s Ashton.”
He frowns. “What’s he doing here?”
I turn and open the door. Ashton walks in and gives me a huge hug. “Are you okay? What happened?”
Raf clears his throat and when we both turn to him, he’s radiating all his angry heat our way. Ashton frowns when he sees Raf’s face.
“What happened to you?”
“Nothing,” Raf says, folding his arms across his chest.
“Uh, yeah, looks like it,” Ashton snorts, turning to me for answers.
“How did the game go?” I decide to forego the drama since I don’t even know where to begin to explain any of it.
“We won.” He grins and I wrap my arm around his waist, giving him another side hug.
“That’s great. Congratulations.”
“Thanks. The bigger news of the night had nothing to do with the game, though…we had another overdose.” He looks past me to Raf.
“Who? What happened?” Raf asks.
“Sheree Monson—freshman. She collapsed by concessions. As far as I know she’s still alive.”
“That’s awful. Did they arrest anyone?”
“No, but I bet they’ll get more intense at school over the drugs. Longlake is supposed to be the straight and narrow. Can’t have word getting out that we’re turning into a bunch of druggies.” Ashton lifts a shoulder.
“You probably have no idea since you were playing, but has anyone said anything about Heidi being there or involved in this?”
He shakes his head. “I haven’t heard anything about her, no.”
“Well, thanks for stopping by,” Raf says.
My eyes narrow on his and he smirks, daring me to argue with him.
“Uh, sure. You okay, Gabi?” Ashton looks down at me. “There was a break-in?”
“The police are still trying to figure it all out. That’s why I’m here instead of my house.”
He nods, glancing over my shoulder at Raf. “Well, let me know if I can do anything. You’re welcome to come to my house too, you know.”
A choked sound comes from Raf behind me and I roll my eyes. “Thank you. I’ll call you later.”
“See ya,” Raf says. He comes to stand by me and opens the door, opening it wide.
“See ya, asshole,” Ashton says.
I giggle and he smiles at me before turning and walking out.
“It’s true, you know,” I tell Raf once the door is shut.
“Never tried to pretend otherwise,” he says.
“How about you go hang out with Heidi and leave me alone about Ashton?”
“How about you quit trying to use Ashton as bait? He doesn’t deserve that. He’s a good guy.”
“A much better guy than you.” I roll my eyes again.
He has the audacity to look wounded.
I shake my head and go upstairs. It’s too early to deal with his stupidity.
I do homework and watch Netflix, ignoring my hunger pains. When I come downstairs, there’s a note from my mom saying she’ll be back later. Two guards are stationed outside and one is inside.
Raf is chatting with him when I go into the living room and they stop talking when they see me.
“Where did my mom go?” I ask them.
“No idea,” Raf says.
“I’m Carl. I’ll be watching things here until they get back.” He’s a big guy, his shoulders wider than my thighs.
“Did they say when they’d be back?”
He shakes his head.
I go upstairs and text my mom.
Where are you?
It’s a few hours before she responds and when she does, it’s cryptic.
Mom: It looks like I won’t be back until tomorrow night. There are extra guards surrounding the house for your protection. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to tell you before I left, sweetie. I love you. Rest and I’ll explain more when I get back.
You seriously left me here alone with Raf and random guards?
She doesn’t say anything and I come up with a thousand different ways to chew her out when she gets back.
Chapter Twelve
I sneak down to the kitchen a few hours later. I don’t care how rude it seems, I’m scrounging around in this kitchen until I find something to eat. I should’ve been checking on Raf throughout the day, making sure he was feeling okay, but I’m so mad at him, I haven’t bothered.
He’s chowing down on a pizza when I come in the kitchen. He looks slightly guilty when he sees me and then his shoulders straighten like they always do when he’s daring me to confront him.
“Nice of you to let me know there was food.”
“I figured if you were hungry, you’d come down.”
“Asshole,” I mutter under my breath.
“That you love to fuck,” he says under his.
My eyes flash to his and he’s staring at me, his eyes roaming up my body slowly, pausing on my legs and then my breasts before eventually working up to my lips and eyes. I know I’m red by the time he gets to my face, and I wish I could turn
around and slam the door in his face, but my stomach is growling too much to do that.
I pick up a slice of pizza and eat all of it before sitting down and picking up another slice.
“My mom says she’ll be back tomorrow night. Any idea where they went?”
“No idea. I don’t have a good feeling about it though.”
“Why? What are you thinking?”
“I’m wondering if they went to Vegas or something…to see if they could find Luke. Or to follow your dad maybe.”
“Why wouldn’t Stefen keep my mom out of it? Does he care about her at all?” My voice hikes up at the end and I put my head in my hands.
“Relax. He’s looking out for her. We may not like it, but I think they care about each other.”
“You better be right.” I drop my hands and take a few bites of pizza. “Why didn’t they tell us what they were doing? My mom likes to keep me in the dark, but it’s not like her to leave at a time like this. I can’t believe she’d leave the state without letting me know…or taking me with her. With my dad being in town? It’s just so weird.”
“It was a theory. They could be in a hotel across town for all I know. Maybe they want to be loud when they fuck.” He shrugs.
I throw my crust at him, knocking him in the forehead. He lifts both eyebrows.
“Really. We’re throwing things at each other now?”
“Don’t talk about our parents fucking.”
“Ah, right. How can I forget? You like your daily dose of denial.” He laughs when I lift another slice of pizza, ready to smash it in his face. Instead, he takes it out of my hand and takes a big bite, talking with his mouth full. “Listen, my dad isn’t exactly keeping me in the loop right now either. I tried to get Carl to spill, but he’s not saying a word.”
I take a few more bites of pizza droppings left on my plate and feel better, even with all the anxiety coursing through my veins. At least I’m full.
“Want to watch a movie or something?” Raf asks.
“I guess that would be okay.”
“What…you gotta check with your mother?” He lifts his shoulders and I glare at him while he laughs.
I open my mouth and he beats me to it.
“I know, I know. I’m an asshole. So do you want to or not?”
“Ugh. You’re so annoying.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
I help him pick up. He puts the plates in the dishwasher while I wipe down the table. I assume we’ll go back to the living room to watch a movie, but he motions for me to follow him down to the basement.
“I had no idea this was down here. We don’t have many basements in Vegas.”
It’s a huge room and there’s a massive screen and plush sectional with blankets and pillows everywhere.
“This is where my dad and I hang out the most…or we used to.”
“What changed?”
“Our parents started dating, for one.”
I groan.
“And he works a lot,” he pauses. “Things got a little weird between the two of us for a while too, when he was so adamantly against my music. I guess we’ve been better again, but it’s still not normal.”
“That sucks, especially if you’re usually close. Are you?”
“Yeah. It’s been hard.”
“I don’t understand why he wouldn’t just want you to be happy.”
“Even my dad has certain standards. Every parent at Longlake has the same disease: perfect child syndrome-itis.”
“Except for being a class A jerk, it seems like you’re doing everything else right as far as what your dad sees.”
He gives me a sideways glance and turns the TV on. “It kills you to compliment me, doesn’t it?”
“That wasn’t a compliment. Clearly, your dad is in the dark about who you really are.”
He shifts so our shoulders are touching and I feel the heat through our clothes. I move away just enough that it’s not obvious, but I can feel him looking at me. I stare at the screen, trying to focus on anything but the way my body craves his.
“What do you want to watch?” His voice is low and raspy and it stirs something in me that I can’t ignore.
“You know what? I think I might be too tired to start a movie now.”
He’s quiet and then I feel his fingers on my chin as he turns me to face him.
“Gabi? You’re not afraid to watch a movie with me, are you?”
I crinkle my forehead, frowning as hard as I physically can with his hand on my face. “What? No,” I scoff.
He smiles and I lose all capability of reasoning. My eyes are drawn to his lips and when they edge closer to me, my breath catches in my throat.
“What about Heidi?” I whisper.
“Forget her,” he whispers back.
He kisses me softly, little nips along my lower lip and then his tongue flicks its way inside. I whimper into his mouth and his hand dives into my hair, pulling me closer.
I lose myself in his kiss for a long time, but when he pulls me over so I’m straddling him and I rock against his hardness, my head falls back and he kisses down my neck.
“I don’t think I’ll ever stop wanting you,” he whispers against my skin.
“This is the last time. It has to be,” I whisper. “We can’t keep doing this and then hating each other more afterward.”
He doesn’t say anything and I lean back to look at him. His fingers trace circles over my nipples and then he pulls my shirt off, his eyes worshipping me. He undoes my bra and when it falls off, he groans and arches into me. He lifts me up and I put my feet on the ground, standing in front of him as he follows me. He slides my leggings down and pulls his shirt off with one hand as he gets on his knees and motions for me to lie back on the couch. I sit down and he situates me until my panties are in his face.
“We don’t need these,” he says, sliding them off and making me shiver when his warm breath hits my sensitive skin.
When he gives my slit a long lick, I groan and so does he. And the fury he unleashes on me in the next breath is on another level. I try to be quiet in case the guards are listening, but it’s like he knows and pulls out all of his tricks to make me explode. I put one of the pillows over my mouth when he starts sucking me hard and he pulls the pillow off.
“Let me hear you. I want to hear everything,” he says, wiping his mouth and going back in.
I lose it in the next breath, when he goes faster and faster, eating me until I can’t think straight. I seize and come apart against his tongue and he rides it out with me until I am only slightly clenching around him still. Cool air hits my skin as he lifts up and his cock is inside me within the next breath.
“Condom?” I gasp.
He pulls out and hurriedly slides one on. “Sorry. I’m so—I lost my mind for a second.”
He secures it and tugs me forward, propping my legs on his shoulders. When he thrusts into me, my eyes roll back. He tweaks my nipples and I feel like I could come again that fast. He starts an unrelenting tempo that feels as desperate and out of control as I feel and I open my eyes and watch him. His expression is fierce and determined and he stares at me with such lust I shudder against him.
“What is this?” I whimper.
“Admit you want me,” he says, his hand reaching between us to rub me in tiny circles.
“No,” I moan, my eyes fluttering shut against their will.
He pulls his hand away and my eyes fly open again. He slows down drastically, pulling way out and slowly driving back in, and I try to speed him up, to get back to that explosive way we were just seconds ago.
“Admit it.” He lowers his mouth to my breast and takes my nipple between his teeth and then flicks it with his tongue. He’s going deeper and harder but still not as fast as I want.
I lean up until my chest is against his and I push him back until he’s on his back as I straddle him. I set the pace then and he lets me for a few seconds, trying to control me with his hands on my hips, but when I start circling ov
er him faster and faster, his mouth parts and I know he’s losing control fast.
“Gabi.” His voice is anguished when I clench around him and he jerks inside me as we come together.
He pulls me against his chest and we catch our breath together. I didn’t admit anything out loud, but I think our bodies said everything for us.
Chapter Thirteen
Once I’ve had a few seconds to come down from my high, I’m embarrassed. Why do I keep letting this happen?
I pull away and stand up, grabbing my clothes from the floor.
“Gabi—”
“I’m just gonna go to bed,” I say quietly.
“Don’t, please—stay.”
I hold up my hand and he stops, his face unreadable when I risk looking at him. Suddenly, all I can think about is how he defended Heidi. I feel like the fool all over again.
I quickly put my clothes on and am to the door when he says just loud enough for me to hear: “I didn’t take you for a coward.”
Humiliation stings my eyelids and I pause but keep walking and don’t turn back. Once the door is shut to the bedroom, I slide to the floor and cry. Why do I keep putting myself through this shame, this guilt, this humiliation?
I’m a broken record. Raf is the last person I should want.
But I do. I want him with everything in me.
It’s a while before I pick myself off of the floor and get my shower. I’m in bed when I hear Raf go into his room and close the door.
It takes an eternity to go to sleep.
When I wake up the next morning, I’m already exhausted, imagining another day of trying to ignore Raf in this house. I can’t wait for my mom to get back and for us to go home. Everything is so unsettled. It’ll feel weird being home too, but anything will be better than this.
I don’t have much of an appetite, so it’s easier to hide. I eventually make my way downstairs when I get too thirsty to ignore it. I listen for noise downstairs and sometimes hear Raf with the guards, but when all is quiet for a few hours, I sneak down to the kitchen. I gather a few snacks and drinks and get the ice last.