A smile grew on his lips and he extended his hand. “I’m Scott and you must be...”
“Caitlyn.”
“Right.” He nodded. I could tell he’d never heard of me before.
“I don’t go here. I just...I’m a friend. Well, maybe. I mean, I don’t...” I took a breath. “He’s my next door neighbor.”
Scott’s smile was in full beam by the time I was done. I waited for him to start laughing at me, but he swallowed it back, his lips trembling with the effort.
It didn’t bother me. Talking to him was easy for some reason. Maybe it was because no matter how long I stared at him, he looked the same. No slipping of facial expressions or hidden emotions.
He just…was.
“Well, I haven’t seen him this afternoon, but you’re welcome to wait here. I’d wait with you, but I’ve gotta go, sorry.” He felt bad. How sweet.
“No, that’s okay.” I waved my hand. “I might...I can come back another day.” I swallowed, half-relieved that I had an excuse to lose my nerve.
“Caitlyn?” Eric’s voice reached me from a few feet away. He was behind me, so I couldn’t see what he was feeling, but he sounded happy. My lips twitched as I turned to face him and that was all it took. He was standing there looking gorgeous in his ripped jeans and checkered shirt with the rolled-up sleeves. I loved that one. It showed off his impressive forearms and those wristbands I loved. But it was the look on his face that did me in. His hazel eyes with green flecks were gazing at me with such open admiration that I lost it. My eyes began to shimmer with tears and my chin started quivering.
Eric’s face washed with concern as he stepped toward me, shooting Scott a quick look of inquiry. Scott shrugged and mumbled a quick goodbye before taking off.
I felt like such an idiot. Swiping at my tears, I sniffed and said, “I’m sorry. I just came by to...um...to um...”
“Talk?”
“Yeah.” I swallowed and sniffed again.
In spite of his obvious concern, the edge of his mouth lifted with a smile. “Come on. I know the perfect place.” He took my hand and pulled me down the hallway. He didn’t say a word as he wove me through the human traffic and out of the building. We walked across campus in silence and I was glad for it. I kept my head down, letting my hair work as the ideal curtain. I didn’t look up until Eric pulled me into a quiet grove of trees. We stopped at a lone park bench situated under a huge willow tree. The long branches created a quiet haven, the dappled lighting giving it a magical feel.
“Wow,” I breathed. “How’d you find this place?”
“I was exploring.” His right shoulder popped up with a shrug as he let go of my hand.
I wrapped my arms around myself and scanned the ancient-looking tree. I was just buying time really, trying to work out how I was supposed to get any of this stuff off my chest. Eric watched me in silence; maybe he was trying to work out where to start as well.
Eventually I gave in with a sigh. Running my fingers through my hair, I brushed it off my face and looked at him.
“I don’t even know how to start this conversation.”
“Why don’t you start with what’s bugging you.” He pointed at the bench seat.
My chuckle was dry and lifeless as I walked towards the seat and sat down. “That’s too huge. Start with something smaller.”
“Okay.” Eric stretched his arm along the back of the seat. It touched my back, feeling strong and warm...both a comfort and a thrill. “Let’s start with you telling me what compelled you to come here.”
I nodded, tears building in my eyes again. “Well, I was on my way to Wyoming and I took a wrong turn.”
“Wyoming?” He scratched the light stubble on his chin.
“Yeah.” I nodded. “I Googled it this afternoon and it’s the least populated state in America.”
“Right.” Now he was looking at me like I was mentally deranged. “And you want to go there because...?”
“There are hardly any people there.” My laugh was pitchy and near hysterical. “I could maybe even go a whole day without looking at someone. Without seeing all they had to show me.” My face crumpled as the tears took me again. I covered my mouth, trying to rein them in, but a few still slipped out.
Eric was working on figuring me out. I watched the confusion and concern flit across his face. His lips pursed to the side and he was worried about what to say next.
“Caity.” When he finally did speak, his voice was low and soft. “Why are you running away? What’s spooked you? Are you in trouble or something?”
“No.” I sniffed. “I’m not in trouble, well I mean I’m not in physical danger, I just, I’m not coping with my new eyesight and the stuff I can see... This stupid gift!”
He grimaced, searching for the right words. Unsure what to say, he ran his finger down my hairline and gently over my ear. “You know you sound like a crazy person.” He smiled. “And I really want to help you, so you need to figure out how to tell me exactly what’s going on.”
He could see my torment and this made him hurt for me. I knew I liked him for good reason. His hazel eyes were near anguished because he wanted to help me and wasn’t sure how. I took in a deep breath and slowly expelled it, focussing on the dappled light dancing over my hand.
“Okay. Okay. I don’t know how this works, but I can...” I licked my bottom lip. “I can read people.”
Eric’s eyebrows rose. “Like...?”
“Like I know what they’re feeling. I can see it on their faces. Everything is just laid bare and I know all their secrets. I mean I don’t know what they’re thinking, but feelings can tell you a lot, you know. And I can’t...it’s too much. I mean I don’t want to know this stuff, Eric. I can’t handle it. I can’t...I can’t...”
“Okay.” Eric cupped my face with his hands, putting an end to my stuttering drivel. “Just take a breath.”
I did as I was told.
“And another one.”
As I was expelling the second breath, he gave me a gentle smile. “I need you to start at the beginning. Did this change happen last weekend?”
I nodded.
“Tell me about it.”
And I did. I spilled it all out, starting with Friday night. I even humiliated myself by mentioning Chase’s sex obsession and how he was supposed to be my first and it would have been the biggest mistake ever. And then I finished with how I left a dead guy in an alleyway. It was such a relief to say it, to finally come clean as if I was confessing to a crime or something. I couldn’t look at Eric while I was talking. I ended up pacing from the tree trunk and back to the bench, rabbiting on about everything I’d seen over the last few days.
I had no idea what he was feeling as I spoke, but the fact that he remained in his seat was a good sign.
“And now I’m here and I want to run away and not face this, but then I thought of you...” I finally looked at him.
He was stoked I’d said that and it made me blush. I rubbed my cheek and began playing with the ring on my finger as his pleasure morphed to a frown. He licked the corner of his mouth, obviously trying to decide what to do with my freak of nature revelation. It unnerved him, and so it should. I mean I got an electric shock from a homeless guy and could now read people’s emotions.
I wanted to turn away, tell Eric to forget I’d said anything, but I couldn’t. And the main reason I couldn’t was because he believed what I was saying. There was no scoffing, no scuttling away from me in terror, just a quiet, calm acceptance.
What was up with that?
Maybe I wasn’t the only non-normal person around here.
“You believe me.”
He glanced up from his fidgeting hands. “Why do you sound so surprised?”
“Because, it’s weird. Stuff like this doesn’t happen in real life.”
“Sorry to break it to you, Caity, but this is real life.”
“No it’s not.” I shook my head.
His smile was tender. “You hear about supernatu
ral stuff happening all the time. It’s not like you’ve grown a second head or can suddenly fly or shoot webs from your hands. You’re just seeing things differently.”
I gave in with a sigh.
“Explain to me how it works. You look at people and you see everything they’re feeling?” He shifted in his seat. It was obviously starting to dawn on Eric that I could do that with him as well. I looked to the grass at my feet, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable.
After a short sigh, I tried to explain. “It’s like layers fall from their faces. The homeless guy described it as masks. People hide behind a mask and I can pull it away without them realizing it. If I can look into their eyes it happens much faster. I glimpse them normally and then everything changes, all their real emotions start to show.”
“And that’s what’s freaking you out? You can’t handle the onslaught of what you’re seeing.”
I nodded. That was exactly it, and the fact that people I thought I knew were not at all who they appeared to be. My heart did a painful hiccup and I pressed my hand to my chest.
Eric placed his elbows on his knees and loosely threaded his fingers together. He tapped his thumb against his knuckle as he thought, no doubt trying to figure out a way to help me.
“Well.” He pursed his lips. “I don’t want you to go to Wyoming and I don’t think your parents would be overly excited about that either. So that plan is now off the table.”
I chuckled. “So what do I do?”
Sitting back, he stretched his arms across the seat and thought for a minute. “I know you’re having a hard time and rightfully so. But you’ve got to come back to what that guy said. He chose you for a reason.”
I groaned and dipped my head.
He brushed his fingers down my arm. “Hey, I’m not saying you have to embrace it. You’re obviously not ready and that’s cool, but running’s not going to help you either. You’re going to have to learn how to process everything you can see.”
“You mean like, control my...”
“Power. Yes.”
I gave him a sideways look. “It’s so not a power.”
“Are you kidding me? It’s like a super power.”
“How can you say that? This is like the world’s worst hex.”
He grinned. “Just wait ’til you can control it. You’ll be like Mind Girl.”
“That’s...” I wrinkled my nose. “That’s a really lame superhero name.”
“Yeah, yeah I know. I’ll keep working on it.” He winked.
I blushed. “You just told me it wasn’t that weird. Turning me into a superhero is not helping.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry. No more superhero names.”
I crossed my arms and sighed, “Thank you.”
His grin was adorably boyish as he slapped his knees and stood tall then turned and held out his hand. “All right little lady, come with me. Let’s go work on your mind control.”
I took his hand, trying to quell the nervous bubbles that burst through me as his fingers curled around mine. I could get use to how awesome it felt to hold his hand.
As we walked out of the quiet grove, the human population came back into view. Reality returned like a hard slap and my immediate response was to grimace and look down at the grass.
“Caity, you’ve got to face this.” Eric tugged my hand. “Now, look at that couple over there. Tell me what you see.”
I followed his pointing finger and took in the guy about ten yards away. He was good-looking and knew it. His smile was near blinding as he chatted to a perky blonde who didn’t know how to stand still. She kept bouncing on her toes as she talked.
Taking a breath, I studied their faces. “He’s into her.”
“Obviously.”
“But he doesn’t want to be. I mean he does, but he feels guilty, like he shouldn’t be flirting. They’re not a couple. He’s hitting on her, because she talked to him first. She’s totally into him. Like stalker into him. She’s...” I paused.
“What?”
“She’s scared he’s going to reject her and she doesn’t know if she can handle it. She’s doing everything she can to impress him. I don’t know why, it’s almost warped, like maybe he reminds her of someone or she’s trying to make up for something.”
I looked back at the guy and anger surged through me as I watched him touch her cheek. His eyes were filled with that hungry lust Stella studied Eric with. I squeezed Eric’s hand and made a move to turn away.
“Wait.” He pulled me back around. “Keep looking at them.”
“I don’t want to.” I frowned. “Why’s he feeling guilty? He’s probably got a girlfriend already, one he cares about...sort of. With this girl, he’s after one thing and she’s after everything. She’s gonna end up hurt. It just makes me sad...and annoyed.”
“I know.” His sincere look was so sweet I didn’t want to pull my eyes away from it. “But keep looking at them. I want you to try something.”
I turned back with a huff. “What?”
“Put the layers back on.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, the longer you looked at them, the more you saw, so just put back what you saw.”
I’d never thought about it that way. I’d probably done it accidentally a few times when the power first hit me. One big blink had seemed to reset my vision. I closed my eyes and tried to picture them the way I originally saw them and opened my eyes, but no luck. The masks slipped away in a nano-second and I was back seeing open emotions that hurt to look at.
“I can’t do it. I can’t hold onto the image. Tell me what you see right now.”
“I see a guy flirting with a girl who obviously likes him.”
I closed my eyes again and tried to empty my brain of anything I’d already seen. Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes and gazed at the couple, willing the snapshot to hold.
“I see it.” I grinned, but it didn’t last long. The layers started falling away and I was once again back to guilt and desperation. “I’m losing it.”
“Don’t.” Eric squeezed my hand. “Hold on to it. Put the layers back on, but don’t close your eyes this time. Try to do it while you’re looking at them.”
Squinting my eyes, I ordered my brain to see what I’d first captured. Painfully slowly the guilty expression morphed to one of carefree flirting and the girl’s desperation eventually ebbed back to pleasure.
“How’s it going? Is it working?”
“Yeah, yeah I guess so. I’m trying to work backward. It’s really hard, but I think I can see what you’re seeing now.”
“Excellent.” Eric spun to face me. “So if you can do that, then you just need to focus on what you see first...before that mask slips off. I know you only get a second to take it in, but if you can practice holding on to what you see in that second, then you can put that back on and not be swamped by all these emotions and secrets. Do you think you can do that?”
I nodded, feeling calm for the first time in days. A smile crept over my lips and I nodded again.
Eric’s solemn gaze made my smile slip a fraction.
“Caity, I’m not helping you so that you can ignore this amazing talent.” He squeezed my shoulder. “I just want to give you a strategy that will stop you from bolting to Wyoming. You’re gonna have to face this at some point.”
“I know.” I nodded, not wanting to hear it but knowing that he was right, and he would want me to agree.
His gorgeous eyes studied me for a beat too long before he was finally satisfied. My steady gaze must have put him at ease, because he eventually grinned. “Okay, cool, let’s go practice on someone else.”
10
Eric pulled me around campus for the next hour, working my brain and eyes until they were aching. By six o’clock, I’d managed to read and unread eight more people. I saw nothing sinister, just little secrets, and it was refreshing to find that at least one of those eight had nothing to hide. It gave me hope in humanity, if only for a moment.
As a thank you, I took Eric out to dinner. He wasn’t happy at all about me paying, but I could be stubborn when I wanted to be. He then told me the only place he wanted to eat was In-N-Out Burger. I thought that was a lie and he was just trying to save me spending too much on him, but he was telling the truth. So we sat at In-N-Out Burger dining on fries animal style and juicy, beef burgers.
I slurped up the last of my vanilla shake, making a ridiculous noise. Biting my lips together, I pushed the cup away from me, willing my cheeks not to turn red yet again.
Eric grinned. “So, you feeling better?” He wiped his hands on a napkin and balled it up.
“Definitely. Thank you.”
He shook his head. “You can really stop saying that now. I think you’re up to about forty thank yous. It’s getting kind of old.”
My nose wrinkled and I rubbed a hand over my face. He just laughed at me, but when I looked up, his smile was missing. His serious expression made me swallow.
Dropping the balled up napkin, he reached for me, drawing soft patterns over the back of my hand with his forefinger. “Caity, can you promise me something?”
“Sure.” With that voice, I’d promise him anything.
“Now that you know how to control it, don’t read me.”
My insides clenched. This was why I didn’t want to tell people. They wouldn’t be themselves around me if they knew. I went to pull my hand away, but he grabbed it before I could.
“I’ll always tell you the truth, I promise. So don’t read me, okay? I want us to be ourselves around each other and if I think you might be reading me then I know I’m gonna act weird. I feel privileged that you’ve told me this stuff and I don’t want you to ever worry that I’ll hide anything from you, so you don’t have to worry about reading me. Does that make sense?” His warm, hazel eyes flickered with bashful concern and I had to nod.
“It might still happen without me meaning to, but I’ll trust you, Eric. I promise.”
He met my shaky smile with a beaming one of his own. I didn’t even have to read him. What he was showing me was pure honesty and my insides buzzed with that euphoric giddiness I always felt when I was around him. Except in that second, it was running on overdrive.
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