by H. J. Bellus
Chapter 17
The End at 1,014 Miles
Lincoln Wilks
“You better hope to high hell I find her, or you’ll regret ever bringing me into this world,” I say furiously to my mom. Then turning to my dad, I snarl, “Keep your fucking wife away from me.”
“Calm down, Lincoln. None of this will help find Oakley,” my dad says, wisely positioning himself between me and the bitch.
“Are you sure she’s not at her fucking apartment?” I ask the police officer again.
“No, we’ve checked,” he responds, treating me like a three-year old.
My mom’s fucking sniffling catches my attention, and I fucking blow.
Racing over, I take a knee and get in her face. “Do you know that’s probably the man who raped Oakley when she in high school, and that fucking lady you so proudly marched in here watched as another man burned Oakley’s palm on a stove top.” My rage grows even more intense as I imagine Oakley enduring these tortures. “Ever notice the fucking scar running down her neck? Again that would be her fucking mother. She wasn’t good enough for you, was she? You just had to break her and embarrass her enough to leave your son. Fucking newsflash, you can’t break an already shattered soul, you fucking piece of trash.”
I feel hands on my shoulders pulling me back, but all I want to do is tear my mom’s face clean from her skull.
“I suggest calling your family doctor and having him sedated,” the officer says to my parents as if I’m not even there.
“Well, I fucking suggest that you…”
My dad grabs me, wrapping me up in a hug and burying my face in his neck.
“Thank you, officer. We’ll handle it from here,” he replies calmly.
I hear the door shut and know he’s gone.
“I want her gone, too. Tell her to leave,” I whisper.
“Elaine, out now,” Dad commands.
Again, I hear the sound of the door shutting.
“Son, I’m going to let you go, but you have to promise to keep it together. Don’t force me to call the doctor. We’re going to sit at the kitchen table, the three of us, and wait for the call. I know you want to go look for her. Just let the cops do their jobs.”
He slowly lets me go, and I head straight for the table.
“But, Dad, what if she’s trying to call me and my fucking phone is trashed?”
I pick up the waterlogged piece of shit and throw it across the room. It goes sailing through a window, sending glass flying in every direction.
“Lincoln, that’s strike one,” my dad warns.
The anger loosens and desperation sets in. She’s gone. She’s really gone. I know my Oakley, and she’s gone. The sun begins to rise, and I’m still in the same spot at the dining room table staring at the broken window. My dad sat by me all night and didn’t say a word.
Levi walks into the room with newspapers in hand and two cups of coffee. He slides one of each to me. The huge color picture on the front page makes me smile. It’s me holding Oakley with my head held back screaming, and the title ‘Conference Champs’ above us. There’s a knock at the door. I’m unable to pull my eyes from her smile, but I feel my dad leave the table to go answer the door.
“Us,” I whisper.
My dad comes back to the dining room, grabs me by the shoulders again, and puts me in the same position as he did last night.
“Son, they think they found her.”
I try to pull away, but he keeps me cradled to him.
“They found two girls in the area last night, but, Lincoln, one of them was dead in the road. We are going to the hospital, and you’re going to have to identify both girls, because the other one is unconscious and not expected to make it.”
I fight even harder with every word he speaks to get loose and run. I just want to run.
“Son, you can’t do this. Stop. Put your head on straight and come with your brother and me.”
Each of them grabs one of my hands, and we walk toward the door. Everything is a blur and passing by way too quickly. Dad puts me in the middle of his truck between him and Levi and begins to drive.
“Hey, Dad?”
“What is it, Lincoln?”
“Why do they even think one of these two girls might be her?”
“They found her cell phone at the scene, son.” His voice is weighted with grief and exhaustion.
“By which girl?” I ask.
“Lincoln, it doesn’t matter.”
“By which fucking girl?” I seethe between gritted teeth.
“The dead one,” Levi finally answers.
“Hey, Dad?”
“Lincoln,” he replies.
“Why do you fucking hate me?”
He dares take his eyes from the road for a moment to give me a sorrowful look. “I don’t, son. I’ve fucked up. Blinded by greed and fame. I’ve only wanted the best for you two boys, and you scared me because you were always so hell bent on blazing your own trail. I didn’t know how to deal with you, so I didn’t.”
“Basically, you’re saying that you’re an asshole.”
“Yes, son, I’m an asshole.”
“I never want to see her again, Dad,” I admit.
“You won’t have to, Lincoln,” Dad promises.
Levi grips my hand as Dad pulls into the hospital entrance labeled ‘EMERGENCY.’
“We’re both here for you, Lincoln,” Levi reassures me.
“She hates Dallas,” I tell him.
“What?” Levi furrows his brows, puzzled.
Dad joins my other side as we walk into the hospital.
“Oakley hates Dallas. I’ve brainwashed her, and she’s an all-defense kind of girl. Just thought you should know.” It seems important to me that he know.
An officer meets us at the front desk and ushers us back to a narrow hallway.
“I know this is hard, but we need you to identify the deceased first. The other girl was raced back to the OR. It’s a miracle she still has a pulse. Both bodies were found on highway 25. It looks as if one was on foot and the other driving. The driver was ejected.”
“No. No. No, Dad, I can’t do this. I can’t.” I look around, frantic to find an exit.
“I’ll go, Lincoln. I’ll go. You stay here with Levi,” Dad says.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
I watch my dad vanish behind a door and bury my head in my lap. All night, I’ve kept my fear and rage in, all night while I waited for any word or beacon of hope. All motherfucking night, and now I have to sit on my ass and wait for my dad to ID the corpse of my Oakley.
Unable to control my anger any longer, I stand and begin beating the shit out of the walls and ripping down pictures. I feel Levi try to restrain me, but I push him to the ground. My fist flies through the sheetrock walls not once, but several times. I lose track as the rage boils out of me. Each time I land a punch, it’s my mom’s face, or Duane’s, or any cocksucker who has ever hurt Oakley.
“Lincoln,” someone screams.
This time I feel several sets of hands on me, and I end up on the ground cradled in my dad’s arms. He’s violently shaking his head, but too breathless to speak. Tears roll down his cheeks, and he trembles.
“It’s not her. Lincoln, it’s not her in there.”
I feel a small poke in my arm and turn my head to see a nurse giving me a shot. The last words I hear are my dad’s.
“They’ve confirmed the girl in surgery has scars on her palm and her neck and a tattoo on the top of her foot. Oakley’s in surgery.”
The room spins round and round. I feel my head begin to slowly slip off my shoulders, and I jump.
“Go to sleep, Lincoln.”
Closing my eyes, I feel Oakley’s soft body under my right arm with ESPN playing in the background and music on the iPod. I feel, hear, and smell it all.
My eyelids are heavy, and the more I try to force them open, the heavier they become.
“Thank you for the update, doctor.”
It’s
my dad’s voice. Update? Oakley, it’s about Oakley.
Struggling through the sedative to sit up straight, I demand answers.
“Lincoln, I will tell you everything, but you can’t lose it again.”
“Dad, talk to me,” I plead.
“Oakley was hit by a car. Your mother admitted to everything. Bringing Oakley’s parents to town and hiring someone to make her disappear if she refused to leave with her parents. The plan was all messed up when Oakley ran, so the getaway driver tried following her and ended up hitting her. She’s out of surgery.”
“Goddammit, Dad, fucking tell me! Is she going to live?”
“Son, they don’t know. She’s sustained so many serious injuries the surgeons don’t even know how she survived the operation. Lincoln, it’s not a day by day scenario right now, it’s more like an hour by hour case. Every hour she hangs on is proof of her fighting to live.”
“There’s more,” Levi adds.
“What? Fucking tell me everything.” I’m not sure I can take any more, but I have to know.
“She lost the baby,” my dad says.
“Baby?” I say, confused.
“She was seven weeks pregnant.”
“Baby,” I repeat.
Epilogue
Lincoln
Life is a funny creature. Once you think you have everything figured out, and clear sailing is all you can see in your future, life throws you a curveball, and no matter how fast or slow it comes at you, you have to decide in a split second if you’ll catch it or allow it destroy you. The best day of your life becomes your worst. Your friends become your enemies, and your family evolves into the monsters under your bed, yet it was supposed to be your brightest hour. The day you make it in the history books. The day you make a name for yourself, separating yourself from the pack. Yet it’s the day that destroys you.
This is how I felt the day I lost Oakley Ann.
I slowly had to let go of all our memories and everything we shared together. It nearly destroyed every single part of me. Watching her fight to survive and experience new surroundings without having panic attacks were the brightest moments of my life. Those memories far outweigh any victory or interception on the field.
The day finally came, and I had to let Oakley go forever. I had to give up all hope of ever seeing her jump up and down in her seat waving a bag of fucking cotton candy at me. I’d never hear Oakley Ann lecturing me about football using all the wrong terms, but listening to her anyway without correcting her.
Today is the day I have to let it all go, because it’s my wedding day. Today I choose to walk down the aisle to the only future I’ll ever know. With my dad as my best man and Levi and Heath as groomsmen, I walk to my future and choose to never look back at what was and what could have been.
Critics are welcome to stand on the sidelines of my game and label me with as many hurtful words as they wish, but today is my day to marry my wife. Oakley Ann is gone forever.
Looking down the aisle I see my bride. With each step she takes, I see pain, sorrow, and joy. I’ve heard other athletes talk about pain, but when I say pain, I’m talking about the kind that fucking rips you limb from limb. The pain that eats at your flesh and threatens to never leave you whole again. It taunts you in your happiest of moments and celebrates on your heart when you finally succumb to it. That’s the pain I see with each step my future wife takes toward me.
My beautiful bride faces me, and I can’t help but smile. Moments pass, and the ceremony begins, but I can’t help but be hypnotized by her smile.
“I, Lynlee, take you, Lincoln, to be my beloved husband, to have and to hold, to honor you, to treasure you, to be at every game whether win or lose. I’ll be by your side in good times and in the bad ones. I love you and promise you this for the rest of our days.”
“I, Lincoln, take you, Lynlee, to be my beautiful wife, to have and to cherish, to honor you and be by your side every single day of your life. I promise to always hold your hand when you need protection from the world. I’ve always loved you and will till my dying breath. It will always be you.”
Rings are exchanged, and it’s time to kiss Mrs. Lynlee Wilks.
Leaning down to kiss her, she whispers against my lips, “It’s just pizza.”
“And I promised you I’d give you the perfect name, Lynlee,” I whisper right back.
THE END
“Never let a name or circumstance define you. Rise above it and one day you’ll realize you’re worth fighting for.” –That Girl
That Girl Playlists
(Created by Jodie Ellis & HJ Bellus)
Pre-game Playlist
Know Your Enemy- Green Day
Let’s Go- Trick Daddy
Fake It- Seether
Blackout- Breathe Carolina
Headstrong- Trapt
Let It Rock- Kevin Rudolph
For Whom the Bell Tolls- Metallica
Till I Collapse- Eminem ft. Nate Dog
This Means War- Avenged Sevenfolds
Clint Eastwood- Gorillaz
Highway to Hell- AC/DC
Can’t Hold Us-Macklemore & Ryan Dalton
Pour It Up- Rihanna
Loud- Mac Miller
Big Shit Poppin- T.I.
Oakley Playlist
Human-Christina Perri
Hanging By a Moment- Lifehouse
Livin’ Our Love Song- Jason Michael Carroll
Who I Am With You- Chris Young
Happy- Never Shout Never
Endlessly- Green River Ordinance
Kiss Me In the Dark- Randy Roger Band
Why Can’t I?- Liz Phair
Whiskey In My Water- Tyler Farr
I’d Rather Be With You- Joshua Radin
I Can’t Not Love You- Every Avenue
Amazing- Josh Kelley
Why Can’t I Say Goodnight?- Nashville Cast
Bleed- Hot Chelle Rae
Like a Wrecking Ball- Eric Church
This Is Us Playlist
Goodnight Kiss- Randy Houser
I Don’t Dance- Lee Brice
Soldier- Gavin DeGraw
Black Roses- Nashville Cast
See You Tonight- Scotty McCreery
Please Don’t Leave Me- Pink
My Eyes- Blake Shelton
All Over The Road- Easton Corbin
1,2,3,4- Plain White T’s
If I Didn’t Have You- Thompson Square
We Are Tonight-Billy Currington
When She Says Baby- Jason Aldean
Best Day of My Life- American Authors
Push- Matchbox Twenty
Play It Again- Luke Bryan
Halo-Beyonce
Don’t Let Me Get Me- Pink
Hall of Fame- The Script
Shake It Out- Florence + The Machine
Wicked Innocence
by Missy Johnson
Available now at all major online retailers.
Don’t let my petite and innocent appearance fool you, because I’m one person you don’t want to cross. I’m Micah, the youngest member of Resurrection…If only they knew how young.
My fake ID says I’m twenty-one. And I will be…in four years.
What can I say? I blossomed early. Home sucked, so I left, determined to do something with my life. Landing the gig as lead vocalist in the band was a dream come true. I’ve worked hard to make something of myself and nothing is going to ruin that for me.
Then He showed up. He’s hot as hell and so into me.
But he’s also twenty-five.
I don’t want to lie to him, but if the truth comes out I’ll lose everything, including him.
*Sneak Peek*
Opening the bathroom door, I took a deep breath and walked out, my head held high. As I strutted across the room, I could feel his eyes on me. A shiver raced down my spine. Turning around, I raised my eyebrows, my gaze holding his. He didn’t move, nor did he falter. He just kept staring.
“Is there a reason you’re staring at me?” I snapped, c
lutching the towel closer to my body. He stood up, his eyes burning into mine.
“You’re walking around in a fucking towel, and you need to ask me that?” he snorted.
His jaw twitched as his gaze slowly and deliberately ran over my body. I gripped the towel a little tighter against me.
“Me?” I said with a laugh. Was he serious? Sure, I’d purposely pushed his buttons, and sure, that wasn’t my most mature moment, but he shut me down, not the other way around. If anyone was messing with the other here, it was him.
He stepped forward until his body was almost pressing against mine. He was so close I could smell the alcohol on his breath. I swallowed, eyeing him suspiciously. What was he up to now? Drunk and frustrated was not a good combination.
“How badly do you want to kiss me right now?” he whispered, his warm breath touching my neck. I gasped as his tongue curled around my earlobe, sucking…nibbling….
Oh god.
My hands shook as I closed my eyes. I was frozen, unable to move, every touch electric. His hands moved along my thighs, wrapping around my hips. I gasped as he lifted me onto his hips, his hands firmly gripping my thighs.
“You’re so cute when you play hard to get,” he murmured, kissing my neck, his erection pressing against me. The faint smell of whisky hit me again, and something inside me snapped. I wrangled out of his hold.
“And you’re drunk,” I said. I leaned down and grabbed my towel, covering myself up. “Exactly how many shots did you have?” He shrugged, his mouth nipping at my neck.
“I’m not drunk, Micah. I just don’t give a fuck anymore. I’m done with the games.”
“Okay, but it took you half a bottle of whisky to realize this?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.
He was right. I did want to kiss him again. With every fiber of my being, I wanted to feel his body against mine, but there was too much at stake. I had too much to lose for him to decide that he wanted me, and then change his mind again.