Captivated On 5th Avenue
5th Avenue Romance Romance, Book Three
Abbie St. Claire
Contents
A Note To The Reader
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Epilogue
Also by Abbie St. Claire
About the Author
A Note To The Reader
Dear Reader,
This series has taken me some time to finish and I’m grateful for your patience. I hope you enjoy this story and fall in love with falling in love as my characters find their happily-ever-after.
To the many that have written me and asked if there will be more books in this series, the answer is yes, there are more planned. Some of the couples in the book still have a story to tell.
I won’t spoil it, even if you try to twist my arm You’ll just have to stay tuned!
Follow me on my website or social media to find out more.
There’s no greater compliment to an author than to share about their work. If you enjoy something you’ve read, tell your friends.
Books are a beautiful escape… to write just as much to read. I’m humbled that anyone would want to read my stories.
Hugs and hearts,
Abbie
Chapter One
Ian
Burning desire
Hopeless thoughts
Endless pain—both physical and mental
Waking up every day loving her—stings even deeper with every sunrise I have to face without her, touching her, listening to her laughter—that glorious sound that first drew me in
She made me happy
She gave me strength
She provided me hope to beat my demons
She completed me in every way
She holds my heart
Without her, I’m lost
Without her, my life has less purpose
Without her, I’m nothing but a lifeless shell
Without her—I’m broken
She’s strong. She pushes on, and the last thing in the world I wanted to do was hurt her
She would always be my world, but I can no longer be hers
I bore the sword
“Are you about to fill another journal, Ian?” Linda poured me another glass of lemonade while I sat on the porch of my cabin overlooking the Montana sky. She was an attentive nurse and had been very patient with me.
“Yeah.” I closed my personal book. “Same words, same misery, same, same, same…”
“You know, you get a new sunrise every day to change that, don’t you?”
What the fuck did Linda know about addiction? How did she know what it meant to break promises to those you loved the most?
“She’ll never understand. She’ll never forgive me and for that, I cannot forgive myself.”
“You know, sometimes forgiveness comes organically. You never have to ask, because that person loves you enough. Don’t try to figure out how she’s going to react. Trust her.”
I was a voluntary resident, fighting my addiction to prescription medications. It wasn’t my first go at rehab, not even close. But, if I were to get Chelsie back, gain her forgiveness, I wanted to be one hundred and fifty percent for all of us.
Forgiveness, yeah, that’s a pipe dream. Once her eyes are opened to the real me, I’ll watch her be the one to walk away.
Chelsie had begged me to give her answers I couldn’t in that parking lot right after the accident. She thought the woman with me was my new lover; little did she know that Marigold was my sponsor. Once again, I hurt her with deception and didn’t even try to stop it.
So much the coward.
The one time I had the courage to reach out to her, I found her blasting social media with someone new. It ripped me. I hit walls and drilled my fists to bury my pain. She said she loved me—begged me to talk to her—to come back. She wanted something I didn’t have to give—she wanted me.
I belonged to the demons inside—the drugs were my conscience. It was a battle I’d fought repeatedly, but only rising to the partial victor and then failing again miserably.
Then when I closed my eyes, I remembered. Our last night together in her room was incredible. The most beautiful and erotic night I’d ever had. She craved me more than I could physically stand. It took everything of me not to release the moment I entered her. The moans that escaped her lips cried out like a hungry animal ready to consume their prey.
She was my everything, and I hurt her more than I could even begin to imagine. Hiding behind the need to protect her did not make me a man. Not even close.
I asked her to remember. I prayed she’d never forget…
Chapter Two
Chelsie
Bump, Bump, Bump
Started by the noise, I jerked my eyes up from my phone to the passenger window. A familiar face peered through the glass. With fumbling fingers, I rolled the window down.
“Brooks, um, hi. How are you?”
“Hey stranger, it’s great to see you. What brings you all the way over here to the medical center?” His nose wrinkled when he raised his brow.
Crap. So, the lies and cover-ups begin. No way to explain seeing an obstetrician.
“Ugh, it was my routine check-up and the doctor I’ve used for years relocated over here. How’s all your girls?”
He walked towards the driver’s side of my car and paused at the vomit just to the front of my bumper. Opening my door, I stepped out with eyes low to the ground and my mind pondering how I was going to sell him on something normal when I was everything but...
Looking up during his pause, I watched as his eyes searched up and down my body. “What’s going on here? Someone’s puked here; you’re thin as a rail, and I’m wondering if there should be a police bulletin out for the driver of the truck that ran over you. You’re ill, aren’t you?”
“No, I’m not dying.” It’s true; I wasn’t.
“Chelsie?”
Taking deep breaths and leaning against the car door for support, I confessed. “I haven’t been myself since Ian left. Can’t eat or sleep and… with the opening of the bistro and my manager’s wedding, it’s piling on stress. Life’s a bit hectic.”
Yes! Championing my great ‘under the pressure’ pitch.
Brooks propped against the car about a foot from me. “What happened to moving on and all the pictures posted on Facebook with your NEW guy?” His attitude came as a punch to the gut. How dare he defend his loyal friend with Bro Code bullshit when he knew how Ian had treated me? Ian moved on, and I’ve simply been existing in a world with problems and no solutions.
“Jason is amazing and a great friend. But, my heart is with Ian. It will always be Ian. How’s he doing? I know th
at you talk to him.”
Let’s see how good of a liar he is.
Brooks stared at the ground for a moment before scratching his graying goatee and returning his eyes to pierce through mine. “He’s getting there. Been a tough recovery.”
Tell me something I don’t know… like why he left me or why he secretly visited me and knocked me up. Did you know that, asshole?
“Having been blocked from his life, I wouldn’t know.” My tone was hateful, but I couldn’t help myself. The two conspired a plan along with Ian’s father to get him back to California after the skiing accident. They didn’t think about how Ty and I would be affected by their scheme. Did they know how much they hurt my little boy?
The engine of my car was still running, and when the air conditioner kicked on revving the motor, it reminded me of needing to be elsewhere. I wobbled opening the door. “It’s good to see you, but Ty is with a sitter, and I should be going. Take care Brooks.”
He leaned in to hug me, but my body stiffened in reaction. He pulled away, hurt. I sensed the heavy burden of losing his friend was far from over for him as well. He knew what he’d done to me in the process, but I could tell his missed his friend, whom he valued more. “Take care of yourself, and if I can ever do anything—”
Shutting the door to him was a bit like closing the door on the past, only the past was growing inside me. The who, what, where and how of my situation formed a huge cloud over me—and a lot of the people in my life who would want answers shortly.
Pregnant.
I kept repeating the word out loud. At a time when I should be thrilled with such news, my mind replayed everything about that night the baby was conceived.
That night…
As hard as I tried to convince myself it was a dream, the bold realization that it wasn’t, left me asking the universe why.
Why would he go to such lengths to visit me again? Was it closure for him? Did he need to know that he could still do it for me? Was it only about control?
God, could he.
I remembered that climax as if were yesterday. In fact, simply recalling the night left my panties soaking wet, my body betraying me to the memory of an ill-fated relationship.
The parking garage was nearly empty since it was well past operational hours. As I pulled towards the pay booth, I noticed Brooks’ car to the right of me in the employee lane. He pulled through his gate and waited with his window rolled down.
Perhaps he’s going to talk to me about Ian—yeah, not in a million years.
After I had paid, I moved forward and lowered my passenger window.
“I never said I was sorry, Chelsie.” His brows knitted together and he appeared visibly distraught. “I never agreed with Ian’s choices, but he’s a pigheaded man and wouldn’t listen to my reasoning. I always had your back, and I just wanted you to know that.”
With pursed lips, a nod of my head was all that I could give him.
When we both turned out of the parking lot in different directions, I sensed another piece of the life I held with Ian vanish.
The drive home should’ve been one filled with hopes and dreams, but instead, I found myself drowning with self-doubt. I wasn’t in a good place mentally, after everything that had occurred in the last seven months. My baby wouldn’t have a father. Ty had a loser dad, and I didn’t know which might be worse. What would I tell Ty? And more importantly, what would he think of me—his mommy pregnant with no man around?
Mother-of-all-meltdowns started and I deliberately took the next exit from the highway, pulling into a parking lot with a jolt. I’m not certain how long I was there, but the phone ringing through bluetooth scared the bejesus out of me.
“Chelsie?”
Hiding sobs, I softly answered her. “Yes?”
“Where’ve you been? We’ve been waiting on you for hours. Is everything okay?”
“I’m sorry, Denise. My appointment ran late, and I’m on my way home now, but traffic is brutal.” Glancing at the stacked up freeway above me, it wasn’t a lie.
“No worries, honey. Just checking on you out of concern. Can’t help that motherly instinct.”
Motherly instincts. I sighed.
My inhale was lengthy; I didn’t want her to hear me cry. “Ty getting restless?”
“No, he’s out with Jorge and Yolo. That’ll give us a chance to chat when you get home.”
“Okay.”
When I hung up, my mind raced. Chat? What on earth did she need to speak to me about? Did she find a listening device the detectives missed? Was something amiss about Ty? I hadn’t exactly been mother-of-the-year lately.
When I looked up, my eyes landed on the marquee for the store parking lot in which I’d been idling… Baby’s ’R Us.
A painful reminder that there was a baby alright, but there was no “Us.”
Chapter Three
“I’ve got some chicken soup and fresh bread bowls made if you’d like to try some?”
Any other time, I’d love a delicious dinner by the hand of Denise, but the thought of food hitting my system had disaster written all over it.
“Mom, it’s so good, I ate three bowls.” Ty gripped me in a tight hug when I dipped to the floor beside him.
“I love you more than a bunch,” I whispered in his ear.
“To the moon and back, again and again.” He giggled, his beautiful blue eyes full of light and promise.
Did he know the ache and emptiness in my heart? How much was I hurting him by wasting foolish time pining away for Ian when I should be focused on him and moving on?
“Yep.”
“Will you tell me a story tonight?”
His curly hair messy after he allowed me a split second to tousle it. “It’s a date.”
He ran off to get his bath and Denise gave me a peculiar look. “Any news from the doctor?”
“Migraines, most likely stress related. I’m supposed to take it easy and get a counselor. You know, the usual answer to all women’s problems.” She followed me into the den and took the chair across from the sofa where I was sat down.
“I think there’s a pill for that, not sure if there’s an app,” she answered with humor before her look turned more sad than serious. “You know I love working for you and sitting with Ty, but I’m going to be staying with my daughter-in-law and granddaughter while my son takes that trip overseas for work that I’d mentioned. I’ll be driving up next Wednesday. You know family comes first to me, but I’ll surely miss you and Ty. I can recommend a replacement if you’d like?”
“Oh, you will have so much fun with little Sophie, and she’s probably crawling by now. I’m good, going to slow down a bit and make my life more manageable. You’ll be missed around here, but I understand.”
She crossed the distance between us and gave me a warm embrace. “You’re like a daughter to me, Chelsie. I worry about you and have been afraid you weren’t well. You’d tell me if there was anything wrong or something I could do for you?” Her brow was raised, and her piercing hazel eyes told me she suspected I didn't tell her everything.
Be more convincing. Check.
My sigh was audible. “Nothing wrong. Just lot’s going on, and I’ve overwhelmed myself by my own doing. But, with the light shortly, I see blue skies peeking through the clouds.”
That’s it, sell the ‘woe is me’ home.
Ty ran in and jumped on the sofa beside me, almost landing on me. I missed those days when he’d curl up on my lap, but unless he was sick or feeling bad, he didn’t do that much anymore—such the growing boy. He had been used to getting most of my attention; I wondered how was he going to react to not being my only child in a few months?
“You ready for a bedtime story?”
He nodded his head, blue eyes sparkling in the lamplight with mischief. A glance at the clock told me it was after eight, and he still had lots of energy and a slight cough. I hoped this wasn’t one of those school nights where he couldn’t settle down, then ended up sick. I didn’t nee
d for anything else to happen. The day had disappeared, fading into a foggy blur, one I’d never forget and yet couldn’t explain to anyone if I tried.
Ty snuggled with me in bed, reading his book and talking about his day. When he started saying his prayers, I fought tears, his pain vivid in his words.
“…And Jesus, please keep Mr. Ian safe and help him get better so he can make Momma happy…”
After Ty had faded to sleep and Denise retired to the guest room to read, the quiet time provided me a moment to slip off and relax. Knowing she was close provided that motherly comfort for me as I did for Ty. Oh, what I’d given to have my Mom around to walk the journey with me…
Unable to wrestle the noises to a halt in my mind, I drew a hot bath, praying for an ounce of peace. But, I’d managed to sidestep harmony for so long, I wouldn’t recognize it if hit me in the forehead with a sheet pan.
So let’s see how my current situation sits:
Pregnant with a baby whose conception I can’t explain to the public because they’d lock me up. Tell that one to Mary and Jesus.
My relationships involve people who keep serious secrets from me and would spill my beans as fast as they could.
Can’t fail to mention that I’ve created a bogus relationship with one seriously hot and super nice boyfriend-for-hire.
Cameras recording my moves for some ghost to reveal at a time most notably inconvenient.
But, the one that hurts me more than anything is that no matter what Ian says, my love remembers—even though he tried to make me forget.
Chills woke me from my troubled dream in the cold bath water. I couldn’t call it a nightmare because there were memories of being happy for at least part of it, but it ended with that help-me-I’m-falling part. As someone who always has a plan, the added stress in my life stemmed from the fact that nothing was scheduled or iron-clad in recent months. Izzy didn’t help, what with throwing in an engagement party and a wedding. Disarray was my middle name, and it was affecting everyone around me, as well. Not to mention that I didn’t know what I was going to do without Denise. Getting a backup nanny couldn’t hurt, but getting used to someone new didn’t excite me.
Captivated On 5th Avenue: Book 3 (5th Avenue Romance Series) Page 1