“What?” Theo ripped his eyes away from Zara, confusion all over his face.
Ahh, so this was one of Dylan’s young, well not so young, offenders, or maybe he was a special needs person. He certainly had a vacant expression on his face, as if he didn’t quite know where he was. Taking the initiative, she slipped out of her chair and stood up, going to Theo with her hand outstretched. “Good to meet you.”
Theo glanced down at her hand, as if it was the first time he’d been offered a hand to shake. Zara smiled, took hold of his right hand, and placed it in hers. The guy nearly jumped a foot off the ground. Had she imagined the static electricity that passed between them?
Not knowing what to do, and worried she’d hurt him, she loosed her grip. But he tightened his, holding her small hand in his giant paw as if he was never going to let go. Unnerved, her eyes flashed to his face, the expression shocking, possessive. However, instead of making her feel scared, it made her feel… She didn’t know. Not exactly.
Warm. Needed. His.
Zara swallowed her panic, and looked to Dylan for help. Her old friend had an odd expression on his face too. Kind of like satisfaction. Zara had been set up; these two had something planned.
Jerking her hand back, she took a step away from them both, wanting to put the kitchen table between them. “What’s going on?” Zara asked.
“It’s OK,” Steph said, standing and coming to her side. “Believe it or not, this is normal behavior for a bear who’s found his mate.”
“His mate.” A fluttering in her chest made her panic. This was what she’d always secretly dreamed of, since Dylan had let her down gently, after she’d admitted her crush on him. The thought of a man who was bound to her filled her dreams for weeks after she’d witnessed Dylan shifting into a bear for the first time. And Dylan probably knew it! “Did you put him up to this?”
“Me? No.” Dylan shook his head, and she wanted to believe him, but there was too much uncertainty in her heart.
“You didn’t set this up? To make me feel good over Christmas.” It sounded ridiculous as the words left her mouth.
“Hey, Zara. Calm down,” Steph said. “Dylan wouldn’t do something like this. And I don’t think Theo is a good enough actor to pull off that goofy expression.”
Theo closed his mouth and stood up straighter, his expression clearing. “Goofy?”
“You have no idea, Theo,” Steph said, amused. “But I’m sure Zara is flattered that you have managed to practically drool on the floor over her.”
“Sorry.” Theo smiled almost bashfully, a hard thing to pull off when you were six foot four and looked like a rugged man of the mountain. She longed to run her fingers through his hair and pull his head down to meet hers in a kiss. The fullness of his lips promised it would be quite a kiss, for sure. A girl could dream, couldn’t she?
“OK. Maybe we should give you two some privacy,” Steph said, grabbing hold of the baby and heading for the door, taking Dylan by the arm and pulling him along behind her. “Come on, Dylan, let’s go look at this roof. Grandpa can look after the babies while I fold the ladder.”
“Oh, the roof, I’ll come help you,” Theo said, backing up rather than turning to leave, as if he dared not take his eyes off Zara.
“I don’t think I trust you anywhere near a ladder,” Dylan called as the door was pulled shut behind him.
Left alone, Theo and Zara simply stared at each other. Zara recovered herself first, going to the coffee pot and pouring the hot, steaming liquid into two mugs. Firstly, because she thought caffeine might help, and secondly because she wanted something to do, something that would give her a few minutes to focus on something other than the man staring at her.
“I’m not going to disappear if you blink,” she said, turning to look at Theo.
“Sorry. I’m in shock.”
“So I can see,” Zara said, beginning to let the truth settle on her. “Milk, sugar?”
“Milk, one sugar, please,” Theo said.
“Why don’t we sit down?” Zara placed his coffee mug on the table and watched him move. He was a big man, with broad shoulders, and strong thighs, encased in worn denim. She swallowed down her desire, and the feeling he was too good for her. That same old sense of being unworthy swept over her.
“I’m sorry,” he said, sipping his coffee. “This was a shock.”
“I’m sure it was.” She looked down at her coffee cup. “The thing is, you are going to have to give me some time to get used to this. I’m not like you…”
“I guessed…” He smiled. “Unless you have amazing self-control.”
“No, not really, especially not for chocolate cookies.” She looked down at her curvy body. “As you can see.”
“I’m trying not to stare,” he said, his eyes flicking down to her breasts, and then he dragged them back up to her face. “But it is kind of difficult.”
“The mating bond, that is what you call it?” Theo nodded, and she continued, “It’s that strong?”
“It is. It’s like, right now, you are the center of my universe, that everything revolves around you.”
She nearly sprayed her coffee across the table. “I have never been the center of anybody’s universe before.”
“Get used to it,” he said. Then he placed his mug down on the table. “Sorry, I may come on a bit strong. Right now, it feels like puberty, times a hundred, hit me. My hormones are raging, and my bear is panting as if he wants to leap out and lick you all over.” His expression changed to horrified. “Not that he would, I am in control.”
“Good to know,” she said nervously, but squirming in her chair at the same time. She wasn’t so enamored with the thought of a bear licking her all over, but Theo, that was a completely different proposition. A proposition, which if he made right now, she might just have to take him up on. “I saw Dylan’s bear a couple of times.”
“I’m jealous, I’d have liked to have been your first,” he said, with a smirk that made her smile.
“I knew Dylan when we were younger.” She decided now was the time to get her past out of the way, to give him a chance to run if he wanted. “We met when we had the same probation officer. After I got out of juvie.”
“What did you go to juvie for?” he asked.
This was where he’d decide the mating bond wasn’t so strong and he should run for the door. “I attacked my step-dad with a knife.”
Theo watched her face, watched the way her gaze dropped, as she tried to avoid the look of disappointment in his face. Instead, she felt the warmth of his hand as it covered hers. “Did you have a good reason for what you did?”
She nodded, tears pricking her eyes. “He attacked my mom. I tried to get him off, but he wouldn’t leave her alone, he was hitting her and kicking her, and … I had to do something.”
“And they still sent you to juvie?” Theo asked.
“Yes. My mom had to stay in hospital for a couple of months, and I had nowhere else to go. I was nearly eighteen and so it was easier to place me there than try to find a foster home for a knife-wielding maniac.” She smiled. “This is where you and your bear run for the hills.”
“No, it’s not.” He squeezed her hand, and she found it incredibly comforting. “This is where I say I’m sorry that happened to you. And to tell you that nothing like that will ever happen between us. I can’t hurt you. It’s part of the bond.”
“And you aren’t worried that I might hurt you?” Why did she feel this need to stick a knife into her heart and twist it? She knew that the circumstances that drove her to pull the knife were out of her control. When her step-dad had her mom on the floor and was kicking her repeatedly, she’d panicked, knowing in her heart that this time he wasn’t going to stop, that he’d drunk too much to comprehend what he was doing. Pulling the knife had been the only way of trying to make him stop. The fact that he’d called Zara’s bluff and forced her to defend herself was not the action of a sane man.
Theo was sane. She was sure of it, as
he looked at her; the pain in his eyes, pain he felt because of what had happened to her, his mate, was real.
“I’m not worried at all, Zara. We’re meant to be together, and I am willing to spend my whole life making you happy, making you safe,” he said.
“I don’t need protecting,” she said. “As for the rest of it…” She sighed. This was all too much, too fast. A thought flashed through her head: this would be so much easier if Dylan had set her up, if he’d asked Theo to pretend, but the look in Theo’s eyes told her this was the most real thing that had ever happened to him. Steph was right; he wasn’t that good an actor. “I need for us to take it slow.”
“Whatever you need, Zara. I’ll go as slow as you want.” He sat back and sipped his coffee, the strain slipping from his face
“This really means a lot to you,” she said.
“It means everything.”
And she believed him.
Chapter Four – Theo
What were the chances of his mate turning up at Dylan’s house, right at Christmas? He didn’t care! She was here, and he was not going to look at this as anything other than the best Christmas gift ever!
Yes, he was excited. Totally. Utterly. Damn, he needed to get his brain to function on some kind of normal frequency.
“I really should go and help Dylan,” Theo said at last.
“I understand,” she said, picking up the coffee mugs and going to the sink to wash them up.
“Hey,” he said, leaving the table and walking, on legs that still felt a little on the jelly side, to stand behind Zara. “I’m not running out on you. It’s only, I promised to help. And I don’t want Steph to get on the roof to help him.”
He tilted his head and inhaled her scent, trying not to let her know what he was doing, because she might find it creepy. Theo closed his eyes and let the scent wash over him. She was like some drug he was never going to get enough of.
“Go, I’ll finish up in here.” She ran the water into the sink and added some dish soap, the suds bubbling up like a snowdrift.
“Come outside with me,” he said, placing his hand on her elbow and turning her around to face him. His eyes flicked down to her lips, and he wanted to kiss her so badly it hurt. “Please.”
Please let me kiss you was what he really wanted to say.
“I should finish up here.” Her eyes latched onto his lips, and she licked her own before she looked up. “What the hell are we supposed to do?”
He chuckled. “I have no idea. I mean, I know, I want to kiss you. Very much. But the rest of it, it’s new to me.”
“If I was … like you … would I know?” she asked, a small sigh escaping her.
“If you were like me…” He shook his head, and ran his hand through his hair: should he say what he thought they would be doing if she was a shifter too?
“We’d be already having sex?” she asked bluntly. Was it written on his face?
“We might be,” he said, and shrugged. “Although I prefer to make love to a woman. Especially the woman I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.”
“Smooth,” Zara said, and then did something totally unexpected, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed his lips, so briefly it was like the whisper of a breeze.
Groaning, he put his hand on the small of her back and pulled her to him, lowering his mouth to claim hers. She didn’t fight him, didn’t flinch; instead, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back, her body pressed close to his, so close she must be able to feel the extent of his need for her.
Sliding his tongue along her lower lip, he pressed for her to part her lips, wanting to taste her, for their tongues to entwine and for her to submit to him in some small way.
Instead, she pulled back, her breath ragged as she said, “We should go outside and help?”
“OK,” he said, his voice rough with emotion. “But promise me, we can pick this up later.”
“I don’t know about later.” She held onto the front of his jacket and rested her forehead against his chest. “I don’t know what Dylan has planned for this evening, and I came here to visit him and his family. So I can’t just treat the place as a hotel.”
She was making excuses, he could tell. “You want some time to let this sink in?” he asked.
“Do you mind?” she asked, looking up into his eyes, and he bent his head and kissed her lightly.
“Of course not, we have the rest of our lives together to look forward to. The last thing I want to do is scare you off.” He placed his hand on her cheek, and rubbed his thumb across her lips. “I can wait. Just promise me you’ll give us a chance. I know you don’t feel it like I do, but I hope you at least want to get to know me.”
“I do.” She turned her head, looking out of the kitchen window at the dimming light. “We should really go. I’d hate to keep you from helping Dylan.”
“OK. The temperature drops quickly at this time of night, so make sure you are well wrapped up.” He moved away from her, ignoring the way it made him feel, as if he was being stretched out of shape. The bond was invisible, but he sure as hell knew it was there, tethering them to each other.
“I have a heavy coat in my car.” She followed Theo out of the kitchen; he could sense her as they walked along the hallway and to the front door.
Holding the heavy wooden door open, he said, “Get your coat, and we’ll go see if Dylan needs us.”
He spoke the words us as if they were already an item, already two people who were joined, when all they had shared was a ten-minute conversation, and one kiss. He was going to have to rectify that pretty damn quick, but he was afraid of coming on too strong.
Even though he wanted to. Really wanted to.
His bear sighed and settled down to doze in the corner of his mind. We can wait, he said, as he closed his eyes. We’ve waited this long, we can wait a little longer.
There were certain hard parts of Theo’s body that did not agree with waiting at all.
Chapter Five – Zara
Zara got her coat out of her car, and Theo held it for her to slip her arms into. She was going to remind him she didn’t need help, but decided to let it go. She liked that he had manners, and wanted to treat her well, and a small part of her liked that he wanted to look after her.
Cherished, that was how she wanted to feel, rather than possessed, although him possessing her in certain horizontal positions might be acceptable. She giggled before realizing it.
“What’s so funny?” he asked, his hands lingering on her arms as she zipped her thick winter coat up, glad she’d splurged on a decent coat that stopped the windchill in its tracks.
“Nothing. Just a little … giddy.”
“Giddy?” he asked, frowning. Then his face cleared. “Giddy would just about cover it. So, you do feel something too?”
“Feel something… You mean in the way you do?” she asked.
“Yes.” His face looked expectant, hopeful and she found herself looking deep inside herself. Was there anything there?
“I don’t know.” She pulled her hood up and held it tightly around her face, not so much to ward off the cold wind, but to hide herself from him. There were some new sensations in her body, a kind of knowing. As if they had been friends and lovers forever. If she let herself, she would trust him with all her deepest, darkest secrets, and there were some secrets Zara had never shared with anyone else. “Maybe. I don’t know.”
He let the moment pass, and the tension that had built up inside her slipped away. “The light’s fading, I should help Dylan.”
He took her hand, and she didn’t object, and he led her over to the small cabin set across from the house. The wooden cabin looked as if it had been there for as long as the mountain, although it looked as if there was a new extension at the back. A shout made Theo look up. Dylan was on the roof, a hammer in one hand.
“Could use a hand, if you are feeling more like yourself,” Dylan said. “This section here is sagging. A good downfall of snow and Grandpa
will be looking at the stars from his armchair.”
“Told you the roof was saggy,” an old man, whom Zara took to be Grandpa, said. He was wrapped up against the winter chill, with Rosie in his arms, while a young child toddled around, picking up snow in his hands before throwing it up in the air, with shouts of glee.
“Hi there,” Zara said to the small child. “Is your name Rory?”
The child nodded and said, “Rory.” Then he threw the snow in the air, making sure he was under it when it came down.
“Can I try that?” she asked, knowing she would be no use on the roof. Hammers and nails had never been her thing.
“Yes.” Rory picked up some snow and threw it up in the air, so that it came down over her head.
“That is cold!” she exclaimed when the icy flakes landed on her face, and some of it slid down the neck of her coat. “But fun!”
She picked up a clump of snow, and waited for Rory to do the same, and then she counted. “One, two, three.” They both threw the snow in the air, and giggled as it came down. It was a simple game, but fun, especially with Rory giggling and gasping at the cold snow on his face.
“You’d be a natural mother,” Steph said, and Zara looked up to see her watching them play.
“Oh, I don’t know about that.”
“Of course you do. You’re a teacher, you have to like kids to teach.”
“Not my age range, I’m a high school teacher. I figured it was a good way to help any kids who might be in trouble.” She threw her hands in the air, and the snow came down, resting on her cheeks before melting away. “Since Dylan told you I’m a teacher, I’m guessing he also told you I’ve been in juvie.”
“He told me. Said it was self-defense and you had no right being punished,” Steph said, kneeling down with Rory and joining in the fun. “And anyway, we’re all about second chances here. You’ll fit right in.”
The snow fell out of Zara’s hands, much to Rory’s disgust. “Again,” he ordered. Rory picked up a handful of snow and placed it in Zara’s hand.
Undercover Eagle Page 14