“He said Uncle Dobs, Jim, wouldn’t be much help and that I was barking up the wrong tree. Now that I think about it, he stopped calling me a few months before Dad finally fessed up to me about this mess. Then Roman approached me, and well, you know the rest.”
Like me, I suspect that the Lane brothers are connecting the dots. If I have to think about it all, it sort of makes sense. My uncle Jim is a powerhouse who’s had his eye on the oval office for years. With the way things have been going the last few years, all America would need is another attack to start a frenzy.
Just think, who would the public vote for? A candidate who’s more interested in policy and economic turnaround, or one who’s been spouting xenophobic bullshit for years?
I love Dobs, and as my only surviving relative, I have always and will always be in his corner, but the man is an idiot when it comes to his personal views.
If he’s looking to boost his campaign when elections come round soon after the violence caused by bombings and unrest, then he’s going about it the right way.
It also makes sense that he’d be involved, because it tells me why my dad was targeted in the first place. Who better to control than someone you know?
“We have no proof, and honestly, we could just be making a few heavy assumptions here because we’re flying blind till Roman comes back with something,”Jace says kindly, making me think of Will’s words from earlier today.
They really are a loving bunch. Just the thought of Jace trying to play this all down to spare my feelings makes me almost squishy deep inside.
Not enough for a PDA moment, but close enough that I squeeze his hand with a shake of my head.
“You’re a terrible liar, Jace, you know that? If Dobs isn’t willing to help then we all know why. And I also know that my uncle is about as willing to go to Homeland Security as he is to break bread with a foreigner. He’s involved, or at least knew about this situation long before this. He just doesn’t want to do anything about it, I guess. How do we find out for sure?”
That gets me a smile from Miah and I forgive him for his bullying tactics and listen as he starts outlining a plan that should work, as long as Dobs is still my uncle and just lazy as opposed to part of the Patriots organization.
“I’ll call him and ask him to come down and help with Daddy’s house. I just hope it works. We need this done so I can stop stewing my kid in stress.”
“Good girl. Now lie own and take a nap. Miah’s going to keep Ma busy for the next hour, and I’ll make sure my sweet Ellie is occupied,” Wyatt says, blowing me a kiss. “I see why he fell for you, Mel.”
That’s about the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me, besides that time Will told me my ass was incomparable. I think I could really love the Lanes. It would just be easier if Roman were here.
“I don’t want to sleep. I want to call Roman and get the idiot out of harm’s way,” I gripe, standing with a yawn that makes them all laugh before shuffling for the door.
“Mel?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m real sorry about your daddy, sweetheart. He wasn’t my favorite guy, and a lot of the time I thought he was guilty and wanted to kill him with my bare hands, but he didn’t deserve to die the way he did. If you need to talk about it, I’m always here for you,” Jared says slowly, causing my stupid eyes to tear up again. “At least it will be better than having Ma cry all over you again.”
I laugh just as he wants me to and shake my head at the memory of Judith crying for Daddy, despite the fact that they never knew each other.
“I’m fine. Just get me my guy back.”
“Even if it kills me.”
***
Roman
I wake when the phone beneath my pillow keeps vibrating and it takes me a moment to realize it’s the burner I’ve been ignoring since I turned it back on a couple hours ago.
The caller ID shows nothing, and I know immediately that it’s not Mel trying to call me again, but one of my brothers. I shouldn’t answer, not with all my emotions still swimming all over the place, but I can’t help the need that courses through me when thinking I’ll hear one of their voices and be reconnected with them.
I miss them a lot, or more than a man of my age has a right to miss people I saw almost every day for over twenty years. The truth is that after being accepted into the fold by Cleo yesterday, I feel so dirty that I’m not sure I’ll ever be fit to see them all again.
She kept talking about my family, the parents I lost, and the destiny I’ve been ignoring for years while under the Lanes’ thumbs. At that point, I was just so relieved to be in with the woman that I hugged her back and even found myself smiling happily.
That gave me pause, and I began to doubt that I’m still a good guy.
Now with the phone ringing, I’m not sure I should answer it.
I do, and immediately start crying when Miah’s voice greets my ears.
“You’ve taken long enough to finally answer, asshole,” he snarls, not bothering to greet or acknowledge me in any way.
I understand his fury right now, and if our situations were reversed I’d cuss him out and find a way to kick his ass to hell and back, before hugging the heck out of him, of course.
Miah and I are best friends and have been since his parents took me in as one of their own. And when he finds out how this all came about and why he was handed this case in the first place, he’ll be even more pissed.
When my family finally knows the truth, there’s a chance I may lose them.
“Bro—”
“No. Don’t go that route with me, Roman. You’re walking a thin edge here and what’s worse is you’re making it so that the rest of us walk it, too, even if you didn’t want it that way. You need to get your ass home, and we need to come at this op from a different angle, Roman.”
I’ve always believed that we needed to have someone on the inside in a top position, calling some of the shots.
I’m so close, so Goddamned close I can taste it.
“No. I’ve almost—”
“She’s pregnant, you ass.”
His words shut me down instantly, and I feel my entire purpose in life make a drastic shift in the opposite direction. I don’t question him, because I think a part of me knew that I’d filled her the last time we were together.
I had prayed that I hadn’t left the woman I love with my child when I knew that I could die and leave her to raise him alone.
Even as the shock ripples through me, I feel elation unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. This is a happiness that’s indescribable.
And yet I feel the danger of it, too, because if anyone should find out, they’d go for her so fast that Miah and Jared wouldn’t know what happened.
“Keep her locked inside that house and out of this till I get home.”
“No. That’s your job, and if you ain’t here to do it, bro…well then that’s on you. I’m not doing another Goddamned thing or taking another order from you till you tell me what the fuck is going on and why you did what you did to Dobson.”
And there I hear it, the recrimination I knew to expect from Miah. The man is a good friend and a better brother, but to him there is never a time when the ends justify the means, I can’t quite blame him for his attitude.
“I didn’t,” I say, watching the door to my room in case Dyson decides to take another one of his midnight strolls as he’s been doing of late.
I sleep, when I can manage it, with an eye and ear open because something tells me that Dyson and Cleo haven’t fallen for my act as they tried to get me to believe.
“What the hell are you talking about? Of course you did. I saw your calling card myself.”
“And I’m telling you it wasn’t me.”
The silence that follows is deafening before I hear Miah start cursing and what sounds like Jared’s yell and a feminine squeal. When he finally gets back with me I hear a keyboard clicking and I smile at the thought of Jared’s dark scowl and the way his h
air would be standing on end while he types furiously.
“You know what that means. Whoever the SEAL mole is—”
“I already took care of the mole and Williams, so try again, bro.”
“Christ, Roman. Get the hell back home before someone kills you. This shit ain’t worth me having to hold your girl up as we lower you into the ground, man. Please.”
“And then what? The last member of the secret council gets away and starts all over again in a few months? Nah, man, I haven’t worked this hard and risked it all just to walk away when I’m this close, Miah.”
If I thought I could forgive myself for it, I’d run home as fast as I could and spend the next few hours just holding Mel in my arms.
I want that so badly, I can hardly breathe for the lump of fear lining my throat, but I can’t. I can’t let it go and have this hanging over our heads indefinitely.
I now have a kid to consider, and by God, my child will be born free of fear and the thought that one day someone could come for those I love.
“It’s better to have you walk out of there than to have to pull your dead body out, Roman. For God’s sake, be reasonable. It’s not just you anymore, bro. You have Mellie and your baby to think of, too. Come home, Roman. Just come home.”
“I can’t. I have one last name to get the senator and then I’ll be home free,” I mutter, hanging my head with a weariness untouched by the happiness I still feel.
“The senator?”
Chapter Seven
Roman
Shit, that was not something I wanted to tell him yet.
This is his interrogation technique. He starts off hard and disarms you with personal shit so that he can spring a trap on you. The fact that I fell for it shows that I’m running on empty and in danger of blowing this op if I don’t step it up.
Fuck.
“I called Melissa’s uncle Jim and he agreed to get the intel I collect back to the CIA. They’re our only good bet right now and—”
“Roman, Senator Dobson is one of them. Even Mel thinks so.”
Jesus, of course they would think that because I told the man to keep his nose clean and stay away from this on the public front. He’s only following my orders.
“He isn’t.”
“Yeah, he is. He’s refusing to help even though the chief was killed.”
“He’s refusing to help because I didn’t want it getting around that he’s feeding the intel to one of my guys in the agency, Miah,” I admit, closing my eyes as he stays silent and starts thinking.
Miah and I know each other too well. I know that even now, he’s putting it all together and coming up with answers I didn’t want him to find out this way.
“Are, are you telling me this has all been an op from the get-go? Are you seriously fucking telling me that you’ve been playing us all from the start?! It was you who took this op to my unit?” he yells, making me wince.
Miah isn’t a yeller, so I know he’s pissed and feels too betrayed.
“I’m telling you that I’ve been following this case for four years, and no matter what we did, we could never get a hint as to who was behind the shootings or bombings that we were investigating. Sheer dumb luck turned up one name, Dobson’s, and I took it from there. When I couldn’t get in, I asked Jim to call in a favor and have you put on it. I needed you and the boys shaking the apple tree, and I needed Lynn to make a move, even though at that point I only had a vague suspicion of her activities.”
At that point, the investigation had already been going on so long without progress that my superiors were threatening to shut us down. I had no choice and only really made my move once I heard Dobson’s name.
The rest of it was pure supposition that I was relieved to find was true. Otherwise I would have had nothing. Luckily for me, my brothers are tenacious assholes and they got the Patriots scrambling so hard and fast, we couldn’t miss the activity.
“You liar. You used us all to get into something you knew, know is likely going to get you killed. When did this all start?”
“Look—”
“Fuck. This started before… What about poor Wyatt? Did you manipulate his life, too, after everything him and Ellie have been through?”
“Poor Wyatt? He got to Ellie, thanks to me, and it all turned out really well in the end. As I see my move saved her.”
“What move?”
“I had Jerry put the idea into Lynn’s head that Ellie was a liability to her. The crazy idiot is so paranoid already, she ate it up and just barrelled ahead. When she got pinched and they all started scrambling to close the gap, I got Cleo.”
“Wait, this doesn’t make sense. How did you know it was Lynn in the first place?”
“Jerry. Jerry has always been my inside guy,” I admit, grinning when I hear him curse and start muttering obscenities.
“Christ, did it have to be him? I hate that guy.”
“Yeah? Well try having to figure out if the man is just crazy or spinning you a line. It took me months to trust him, and believe me, he’s not the easiest to work with on an op because he’s jumpy as hell,” I mutter.
I love the guy and thank God for him every day, but I won’t be sorry when this is over and we can part ways.
“Dammit, Roman. They all know who and what you are if what you’re telling me adds up.”
“Yea.”
“Get out. We can rework your plans. Cleo’s gone nuts since she woke up and couldn’t get to Paulie.”
I grin when I hear harsh voices exchanging unpleasant words, followed by the sounds of Miah and Jared scuffling.
“Hey, bro. You do your biggest little brother a favor and take that woman out before she makes a play for Paulie again.”
Oh, Jared, always the bloodthirsty one and yet the gentlest man I have ever met.
“Sorry, bro, no can do. I want the name of the top dog in this thing, and with Lynn unavailable it’s Cleo on the block.”
“Dammit, Miah, that hurt! Stop.”
I hear more cursing and then Miah is back, letting me know how unimpressed he still is with me.
“I’ll find Lynn. Case is still on her ass, and last I heard she was hiding somewhere in South America. You just do what you can quickly and get home before your woman starts getting nastier than she has been thus far.”
“Dude, keep your nuts covered if you know what’s good for you. Look, I gotta go.”
“And then what, Roman? You stop answering your phone and don’t call? Again. You have to be smarter about this. It’s no use getting the last name if you aren’t alive to tell anyone,” he says darkly.
“I won’t—”
“And she’s hurting. Mellie is hurting real bad right now, bro. Your woman needs you more than she’ll let anyone know, but I can’t miss her red-rimmed eyes or the way she keeps staring at Pop with her heart all over the place. She needs you, Roman.”
Fuck.
“I’ll get out for one night. That’s all I can promise. Is that break in the perimeter still there?”
“Yeah. Bronx wired it, though, so step lightly and do not walk in a straight line if you can help it. I’ll let him know you’ll be in sometime this week.”
“Thanks. Miah, I—”
“Not yet. We’ll talk when I can beat your ass for this shit.”
“In your dreams. I gotta go.”
I end the call with a heavy heart, knowing that I may not be capable of keeping the promise I just made, but needing it just as much as I’ve needed anything in my life.
I’m not a wuss and I’ve never been one to allow emotions to rule my life, but if Mel needs me, I will find a way to get to her.
***
Melissa
The call with Uncle Dobs was a weird one, to say the least. If I hadn’t been informed by Miah that the poor man is innocent, I would have totally sneered at the obvious tears he kept crying on the phone.
Talk about awkward, trying to comfort a man you suspected of treason not twenty-four whole hours ago. The I�
�d fought my own tears when he kept saying over and over again that he should have just helped Daddy when he called, but he was terrified of getting involved because there were rumors that he was going to be investigated at one point.
The excuse and his obvious remorse do nothing to kill my anger for the man, but he’s
all I have left. With the way things are going in my relationship, I can’t say I’m about to count Roman as a part of my little family yet.
Not till he tells me he loves me and swears to commit to me more than to his stupid job.
Now Dobs is on the way and I’m headed over to my father’s house to clean up and get the place ready for sale. I also have to get his ashes from the funeral home and see the lawyer, but for now, I just want one minute of peace to consider what my next steps will be.
Jared is right, and though this morning’s conversation during the car ride to the bar wasn’t great for my anger, I’ve considered Miah and Jared’s advice and I’ve decided to step back and let Roman have at this without my interference.
I have problems of my own and a kid to consider.
I’m doing something the old me would applaud, something I never would have considered until Jared let me know very honestly that I belong to the Lane family as much as I do to myself or Roman, specifically.
No matter what, I will never be alone again.
I feel so much better after having someone reassure me of that. In fact, I feel so good that when I looked up a half hour ago and saw Fin, one of Will’s guys, staring at me in a weird way, I didn’t even acknowledge it.
“Hey, Melissa, you sweet little angel, how about coming on over here and talking to an old man,” Lonnie yells from the end of the bar, throwing Fin a look hot enough to peel his skin clean off his bones.
I shuffle over in my Converse and a pair of pants that Ellie gave me with an elastic waistband that makes me feel like Fat Betty.
“Hey, Lon. You okay?” I ask, pushing a beer his way and grabbing a chilled ginger ale and a cracker that tastes like sawdust but settles things down nice and easy.
ROMAN (Lane Brothers Book 5) Page 6