She shook her head and refocused her mind. The material point was she had allowed him liberties she had always imagined herself refusing any man...and she had enjoyed them immensely. She ought to feel some sense of obligation to him.
As a girl, she had always meant to marry only for the deepest love. As a young woman, she wanted esteem, affection, and companionship, but she found she did not at present dislike Darcy so much as she had for these last several weeks. She learned he deserved her respect and esteem. He certainly was acting the part of the gallant by offering to marry her when his reputation would not be the one damaged and when he could aspire to much better. She saw he could be agreeable; perhaps she might even teach him more liveliness.
She knew she could never find a better match by society’s expectations, but was that what she wanted? What if they did not get along? One night of enjoyment, even if it seemed to erase her previous dislike, was not enough on which to base a lifetime and marriage. Would Darcy regret marrying a country girl without connections or fortune?
She began to drift to sleep at last, smiling as she remembered Darcy’s arms around her, his intoxicating scent, and the look in his eyes as he professed his admiration for her this morning. She was too tired to reprimand her wayward thoughts, but perhaps it was just as well. She thought too much.
*****
Darcy paced around the downstairs hall, waiting for Elizabeth to descend. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Bingley fidgeting and looking slightly pained; parting with his angel was clearly taking a toll on him. Caroline and the Hursts were in the drawing room, waiting to be summoned to see the guests away. At last, Darcy heard Elizabeth and Jane on the stairs.
Elizabeth allowed Jane to go first, and Bingley quickly offered her his arm to escort her to the carriage.
Elizabeth was beaming, and Darcy had to catch his breath. She smiles at her sister and Bingley, not you, he told himself. He could not help dreaming of the day when he might receive such an affectionate look from her.
He moved towards Elizabeth and reached the bottom of the stairs just as she stumbled on the second to the last step, the broken one. She lurched forward and grasped his arms, near his shoulders, as his hands caught her around the waist.
They stared into each other’s eyes for a moment before he managed to speak. “Are you well?” Her petite fingers were still pressing into him.
She looked dazed and replied breathlessly, “Yes. What timely help you are.”
“I would wish always to assist you. Here, take my arm.”
They passed the drawing room just in time for Caroline and the Hursts to emerge to fare them well. Caroline was clearly discomposed to see Elizabeth on Darcy’s arm but apparently determined it not worth the bother to see her guests outside. She gave Elizabeth a hearty handshake and Jane a tender hug before allowing the gentlemen to escort the ladies to their conveyance. She and the Hursts returned promptly to the drawing room.
Bingley had just handed Jane in when Darcy turned and spoke quietly to Elizabeth, who was still on his arm. “Allow me to offer you my hand.”
Elizabeth looked at him in confusion. Certainly he meant to hand her into the carriage, and since she had already accepted his arm, the consent was already granted. There was no need to ask permission. Then she saw a certain unguarded look in his eye and began to understand.
Darcy squeezed her hand. “Please….” Then he mouthed her Christian name, being careful not to let anyone hear or see him take the liberty. He could not explain it, only that it felt like his very salvation hinged on Elizabeth accepting this proposal.
Elizabeth was as astonished by the humility in his face and voice as she was by the humble forwardness of his manner. Looking him squarely in the eye, she replied clearly and distinctly, “I thank you. I accept.”
And thus the deed was done, and the carriage pulled away, leaving both suddenly aware of the gravity of their agreement. Elizabeth looked back and saw him standing, the corners of his mouth turned up in a shy smile. If she had to name the look, she might call it hopeful, a sentiment she shared
Chapter Three
“I hope, my dear,” said Mr. Bennet to his wife as they were at breakfast the next morning, “that you have ordered a good dinner today because I have reason to expect an addition to our family party.”
After assuring his wife that the visitor was not Charlotte Lucas, but rather a gentleman and a stranger, Mr. Bennet paused to allow her the necessary effusions.
“A gentleman and a stranger! It is Mr. Bingley, I am sure! Well, I shall be extremely glad to see Mr. Bingley!”
“It is not Mr. Bingley.”
His pause was, to Elizabeth, dreadful. Her heart slammed in her chest. Mr. Darcy must have sent a note requesting to call upon her father today. They had not arranged such an interview, but it could not be avoided. She dearly wished she was not causing her father pain by accepting the man she had so openly disliked only half a week before. And her mother! Darcy simply could not be in the house when she informed Mrs. Bennet.
At last, Mr Bennet continued, “It is my cousin, Mr. Collins, who, when I am dead, may turn you all out of this house as soon as he pleases.”
Nearly a week away from her family had made them dearer to Elizabeth, yet at the same time, her tolerance for her mother’s effusions was less than ever. Perhaps it was simply because she imagined how Darcy would observe this scene. She winced as her mother’s shrill voice pierced her ears.
“I cannot bear to hear that odious man mentioned. Pray, do not speak of him further. I do think it is the hardest thing in the world that your estate should be entailed away from your own children, and I am sure, if I had been you, I should have tried long ago to do something or other about it.”
This time, she and Jane did not even bother attempting to explain the nature of an entail to their mother yet again. Their father continued to read his cousin’s letter aloud, which proved Mr. Collins to be a ridiculous person.
The man himself arrived promptly at four o’clock. He was an oddity in the extreme: a mixture of pride and obsequiousness, self-importance and humility. His first day and evening passed with heavy tedium. It could only add to Elizabeth’s vexation. Why had Darcy not called?
*****
The next morning, Lydia and Kitty desired to walk to Meryton, hoping a certain officer had returned from his errand in Town. Elizabeth could not be pleased by the motivations of such a scheme and was disappointed to hear it supported openly by her parents. Her mother was insensible to the impropriety of her daughters being so forward, her senses so far from right herself. Her father desired only to rid himself of the noisy girls with whom he lived, and his ridiculous cousin who invaded his book room and whose folly had already been laughed at in sufficient abundance the previous day. Elizabeth had an additional reason to stay home, believing Darcy might call, but knew it to be more prudent to attend her sisters and try to moderate their behaviour. Thus, all the young people but Mary walked to Meryton.
While on the walk, Elizabeth could not be pleased by her cousin’s attentions. He stuttered inanities to the whole group, but Elizabeth believed she detected some partiality aimed at her. Mr. Collins had written of his intention to offer an olive branch to the Bennet family for his part in the entail and that he had come prepared to admire his cousins. The previous evening, he declared he had been encouraged to marry by his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, and he extolled at length the advantages of his situation and connection to that great lady.
Undoubtedly, he meant to find a wife, and Elizabeth’s mother was a determined matchmaker. Not to have her goals affronted by Collins discouraging Bingley, she had evidently guided him away from Jane, and he settled on Elizabeth as the possible companion of his future life. Elizabeth allowed a wry smile as she realised her engagement to Darcy would save her from that unpleasant fate at least and avoid the embarrassment of Collins’ proposal to her. She would escape the necessary refusal and the expression of her mother’s extreme displeas
ure that would follow.
As soon as the party of walkers reached the main street of Meryton, her younger sisters espied the very officer they had been hoping to hear of, as well as an uncommonly handsome gentleman who only wanted regimentals to be entirely charming. Mr. Denny instantly set about introducing the Miss Bennets to the young man, Mr. Wickham, who was soon to be a lieutenant in the militia.
They had been speaking to their new acquaintance for a few minutes when the sound of a horse drew their notice, and they saw Mr. Bingley approach. He was clearly quite happy to see Jane and declared it had been his intention to call on Longbourn to see how she recovered.
Elizabeth was surprised to see him alone. “And how is everyone at Netherfield?” she asked him. She could not account for it, but she was desperate to hear news of Darcy. His delay in calling at Longbourn awakened terrible suspicions.
Bingley startled at first, so intent on gazing at Jane was he that hearing another’s voice clearly surprised him. “They are all very well, I thank you.”
Elizabeth was not satisfied with this answer and pushed for more information. “Your sisters have not suffered from their contact with Jane, I hope?”
Bingley looked at her with unhidden puzzlement. “No, they are perfectly healthy. As I can see are you, thankfully.”
Elizabeth chewed her lip and decided to ask forthrightly. Soon they would be openly betrothed. She should not fear showing some kind of preference in the days preceding the announcement. Indeed, it might lessen the surprise to the community.
“And how does Mr. Darcy do? Did business keep him indoors on such a fine day?”
Bingley gave Elizabeth a meaningful look and replied, “Yes, I suppose it might, but I do not know if the weather is near so fine in Town today. He left yesterday at dawn on pressing matters of business, but he is expected back tomorrow or the next day.”
He gave Elizabeth another look before turning his attention entirely to Jane. Elizabeth was shocked to think Darcy would have shared news of their betrothal with Mr. Bingley. She had not breathed so much as a word of it to anyone.
Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Mr. Wickham startle and turn pale at the mention of Mr. Darcy, then smile during her discourse with Bingley. What could be the meaning of such a reaction? It was impossible to imagine; it was impossible not to long to know.
Bingley accompanied the sisters to their Aunt Phillips’ house, and although Wickham and Denny were invited to visit, they did not. Mrs. Phillips did promise to have her husband call on Mr. Wickham and issue an invitation to dine the next day along with several other officers, and a plan was set for the family from Longbourn to come for dinner. Thereby, the ladies might meet with Wickham again.
*****
Jane smiled at Mr. Bingley across the room of her aunt’s house. Many gentlemen had admired her through the years, but none had been so amiable as he. Not only could he deal the effusions of her aunt and mother, but also their temperaments were so similar. Jane knew Elizabeth felt she was too forgiving and too kind towards the whole world, yet it was how she truly felt. To find a young man who seemed to feel the same way, who was not jaded or cynical, was a rare blessing. For if they viewed the world so similarly, then there was no fear of their union dissolving into the disrespect she witnessed in her parents’ marriage.
At last, it was time to depart. Mr. Collins firmly attached himself to Elizabeth’s side, and Kitty and Lydia ran ahead, leaving Jane and Mr. Bingley to themselves. He slowed their walk.
“I think the foliage of Hertfordshire is some of the prettiest I have ever seen,” Mr. Bingley said to her.
“I confess I would not know. I have travelled too little to compare it to anything else.” She glanced at their path. It was late November; there was little to remark on.
“There seem to be a number of natural beauties to admire. Some I have never seen the like of anywhere else.” He gave her a significant look, and she could not help but blush.
He tugged on her arm and nodded towards a different path. “Might we follow this path for just a bit? I know it comes back to the main road.”
Jane bit her bottom lip. It was one thing to happen upon a gentleman on a solitary walk and allow him to escort you; it was another to leave the company of others for more private tête-à-tête. It would be viewed as an assignation, even.
“Do you trust me, Jane?” he asked while gazing into her eyes.
Her heart began to beat wildly, and she only managed to nod her head while following his lead.
Once safely on their separate path, he spoke. “I find Netherfield to be a very pleasant house.”
“It is,” she replied. How she wished she could think of more to say! “And the park is quite nice.”
“Indeed.” She began to pray he would not find her stupid in her awkward shyness. “I have an excessive regard for all of the Meryton locals.”
“That is very kind of you to say.” Jane kept her eyes on the path ahead.
“There is one lady in particular who has captured my heart.” He ceased walking, and without thought, her eyes turned to find his looking at her with earnestness. “I would even say it is love.”
Jane felt hot and cold while her heart raced. Her stomach knotted and speech left her, yet she did not break the bond with his eyes.
Mr. Bingley knelt as he took her hand. “My darling Miss Bennet, my Jane, you must know my deep attachment to you. I have loved you since I first clapped eyes on you. I cannot think of the future, of happiness, of having any sort of life at all without you by my side. Say you will be my wife?”
At first, she only shyly nodded, but he pleaded with her. “Are you saying yes?”
“Yes!” she finally choked out as tears ran down her cheeks. “Yes, I want nothing more than to be your wife.”
He rose immediately, then lifted her into the air in a circle. She clung to his lapels. “You have made me so happy!”
She laughed freely as well. “You have made me happy!”
He set her on the ground. “We will always be happy.”
Jane smiled. Yes, they always would. Their dispositions were not given to depressed spirits, but they would find their greatest happiness in each other. Her heart still beat wildly, and his hands still held her waist. “We will, Mr. Bingley.”
“Call me by my Christian name now,” he said as his eyes finally left hers and lowered to her mouth.
“Charles,” was all she had murmured before his lips met hers. Her hands were still on his coat and soon drifted around his neck, holding him to her. He groaned into her mouth as the kisses went from feather-light and exploratory to insistent. At last, he pulled back.
Both had to catch their breaths. “Dear Jane, what you do to me,” was all he could say for some moments as his forehead rested against hers.
Jane knew she ought to have been afraid of the passion they just shared, at what she felt running under her skin. She should feel embarrassed by her desires and affronted that Bingley cared so little for her reputation that he thoroughly kissed her on a path quite near the main road to Meryton, and they now must be so far from her family as to give rise to suspicions. But she did not care for those things at all. In the arms of her betrothed, all she considered was how she had never felt more alive and purely herself than when she was pressed against him and their lips moved in unison
“Come,” Bingley said while Jane still felt dazed. “I must speak with your father immediately.”
Jane smiled as he led her to Longbourn. She would follow him wherever he took her.
Upon entering the house, Bingley requested an audience with Mr. Bennet, and Elizabeth quickly glanced at Jane. She smiled and blushed as Elizabeth grinned.
Their mother immediately perceived that Bingley had proposed and was requesting Mr. Bennet’s blessing. She began shrieking in happiness and even ordered punch for the servants.
Among the exclamations, Jane was quite alarmed to hear, “Two daughters soon to be married! My Jane with five thousand a y
ear and Lizzy mistress of Longbourn. Yes, God has been so very good to us!”
She could only hope Elizabeth would be saved a fate from marrying Mr. Collins, or any man she did not love.
*****
Elizabeth attempted to hush her mother, to calm or shoo her away, but did not know how to silence her. She tried to hint at the impossibility of her accepting a proposal from Mr. Collins, but her mother refused to hear correctly. By the time Elizabeth trudged up the stairs to her chambers for the night, she was exhausted.
She was surprised Bingley had proposed so soon but was excessively pleased for Jane, though less certain Jane truly knew her own heart. Elizabeth recognised she likely was considering her feelings for Darcy in that instance. Jane had been nurturing a tender regard for Bingley since first sight, whereas Elizabeth courted prepossession and stubbornness at first. In her determined prejudice and blindness, she very nearly drove reason away where Darcy was concerned, and all over her wounded vanity.
Again came the nagging concern that she was merely pleased with Darcy’s attention that evening in the Netherfield library. She was now less inclined to think it was a sign of wantonness than that his regard soothed her vanity. She was not happy with the attentions of Mr. Collins; he was an odious man.
Elizabeth reasoned that if she might elicit some sign of partiality from Wickham, who was quite handsome and amiable, then she could determine if her change in feelings towards Darcy was entirely out of vanity and gratitude for his admiration, or if there was a more genuine feeling for him. She would not flirt or forward Wickham’s attachment, but as she was not yet openly engaged, neither would she vehemently discourage his attentions or dismiss him.
Elizabeth was also confused by Darcy’s absence. Had he gone to Town to meet with his solicitor and begin matters already? She knew he could not be purchasing the marriage licence yet, as he did not have her father’s approval, and she was not yet of age. Might he be away on business not related to their betrothal? If only they had taken the opportunity for a short, private discussion before she left Netherfield.
Compromising Mr. Darcy Page 30