by Robin Gianna
Miranda’s heart squeezed at the pain and fear in Ana’s eyes. “Mateo does understand.” Miranda chose her words carefully, not wanting to speak for Mateo but wanting to pass on basically what he’d told her. “Our being together does mean he’ll be living in New York part of the time, but he expects to come here several times a year.”
“That’s not enough. We need him here, which is why you must let him go.” She reached to touch Miranda’s arm, an imploring expression on her tired face. “You met my Emilio’s wife tonight. You saw what a wonderful woman she is. A woman who adored her husband. My son.” She lifted her wrist, encircled with a glittering gold bracelet studded with pearls. “Emilio gave this to me when he first took over running the estate, on my birthday. A gift to show me his commitment to me and our family and his responsibilities. Camilla helped him choose it, I know. She’s a woman full of grace and style, loving and giving and from a good family with deep roots here. She has told me she will help find a suitable wife for Mateo.”
Astonishment, anger, and hurt burned in Miranda’s chest. Even if Mateo hadn’t told her the truth about his sister-in-law, she’d have been upset at Ana’s utterly rude dismissal of her as being worthy in any way of her second son. “What makes you think I don’t adore your other son the way you believe Camilla adored Emilio? And why would he want to marry someone who doesn’t love him? Perhaps your attitude is why Mateo doesn’t want to come back here to live and work full-time.”
“What do you mean? I love my son more than anything in the world. A wild boy as a child, we knew the army would bring him focus, and his many medals prove that it did. He’s a fine man now, and I have to believe he will step up to his duties as the heir.”
“Have you tried to talk to him about all this? About his plans? Maybe his answers would surprise you.”
“The only surprise has been his engagement to you, which is the one thing that would keep him away. I would guess that once you found out Mateo wasn’t like other emergency medical professionals in the U.S., but, in fact, a wealthy man from a family whose dukedom goes back hundreds of years, you set your net out to snag him as quickly as possible. It’s what too many women do.”
Miranda gasped in disbelief, anger surging so fast into her skull it made her brain scorch. “I can’t believe you would actually say such a thing when you don’t know me at all.” She wanted to talk about her own family’s wealth, her personal hardships, her hard work to prove herself to everyone, but decided she wouldn’t stoop to the other woman’s arrogant and judgmental depths. But she couldn’t keep from telling her, at least when it came to the money, how wrong she was.
“For your information, it’s been my experience that fortune hunters impressed by pedigree and money are often represented by the male sex, disguised as appreciative suitors. I’ve been targeted by fortune hunters interested in everything but me personally since I was in high school. Believe me, the absolutely last reason I’m attracted to Mateo is his money and position here, and the expectations you carry for him as the next Duke. In fact, that’s the only thing I can think of that would make me walk away.”
She spun away, the woman’s words clawing at her gut, her own words disturbing her in a different way.
The only thing that would make her walk away was his parents’ attitude?
As she nearly ran back to the house, her breathing went haywire at the realization that, deep inside, she’d meant it. And what did that mean, when all this had begun as a charade? A planned strategy by Mateo, with some pleasant vacation time in the midst of it?
She clutched her coat close to her throat, a stark and scary reality slamming into her, making it hard to breathe.
What had started out as pretence had become horrifyingly real for her. Somehow she’d let herself fall hard for Mateo Alves. A man who had no interest in a real and lasting relationship with any woman.
She dropped onto one of the outdoor chairs on the loggia and clutched her cold hands together. Mateo had wanted a simple excuse to bide his time taking on his family duties, and have them eventually accept that he wouldn’t live here full-time. She’d wanted to help him with that, not fully understanding the difficult dynamics of his family situation after his brother’s death.
Now she did. His parents’ pain over losing their son was still raw. And even though he hadn’t said much about it, she knew Mateo’s was, too. No one thought clearly during times of grief. If she was truly a friend to Mateo, she’d help him see that all of them needed more time to process it, to figure out what needed to happen next.
Maybe Mateo really should move back here for a while. Ease his parents’ fears. Studying psychology was part of medical school, and she had to assume that the reason Ana had lashed out at her with such harsh words was because, deep inside, she felt scared to death. Her husband was ill, and would slowly get worse with time. She’d lost her beloved son who’d been there to support her. She didn’t realize that she’d driven her other son away once, and was doing it again.
As she thought it through, trying hard to see it from Ana’s perspective, Miranda’s heart felt heavy, hurting for Mateo and for all of them. Because to make one of them happy, the other would be unhappy. So where did that leave them?
She didn’t know, but what she did know? She’d lived that quandary herself. Being able to leave behind poverty and an uncertain future to become part of the Davenport family, eventually becoming close to her half-siblings, meant Vanessa had had to endure seeing the physical reminder of her husband’s infidelity every single day. Vanessa being happy instead would have left Miranda in a very dark and hopeless place.
A shadowy figure emerged from the garden, and she looked up to see Ana moving up the ancient stone steps to stand next to her, her face now filled with worry instead of hostility.
“I am sorry to have insulted you by assuming you are after money and prestige. Maybe you genuinely care for Mateo. But you must see why we need him here, where he belongs, while you have your work and your own family back where you belong. Do you understand?”
“I believe I do.” She rose and let herself really see the pain and anxiety in the woman’s eyes. Seeing it there forced her to really look at what a tough situation the Alves family was in. And because she wasn’t a part of it, not for real, she suddenly knew it was time for her to go. To let Mateo and his parents work out this problem for themselves, without her being there to muddy everything up with a relationship and engagement that wasn’t even real. Her being here, participating in this charade, was just making things worse. Making it impossible for Mateo to stay longer, to deal with the pain of Emilio’s death together with his parents. To mend the fences between them.
“I’ll be going now,” she said quietly. “I’ll ask Mateo to cut our trip short so I can go back to New York. Let him decide if he’s coming back with me now or staying longer as you...talk more about everything.”
A tremulous smile formed on Ana’s lips. “Thank you. With you breaking off your engagement, I know Mateo will—”
“Breaking off our engagement?”
Both women swung toward the French doors to see a frowning Mateo striding toward them.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“WHAT’S GOING ON out here?” Mateo asked. “I was trying to find you, to tell you that Father is feeling much better, only to hear my fiancée is leaving me?” He folded his arms across his chest, giving his mother a sharp look. “What are you talking about? What have you said to her?”
“Merely what you already know, and that she now understands.” His mother lifted her chin defiantly. “You must think about your family and why we need you here, without an engagement complicating your thoughts and decisions.”
“My decisions are exactly that—mine! Why do you refuse to accept that?”
“Because you know there’s more at stake here than selfishly pandering to your own desires! What h
as happened to you? You spent four years in the army, defending our country and our way of life, always living up to your responsibilities. How has that changed now that you’re needed here more than ever?”
“I like my life in New York. I still see no reason why I can’t take care of the responsibilities you speak of while living here only part of the year.”
“Your brother worked hard here, many hours a week, managing all the business interests of the estate. That’s not something that can be done part-time, or from across the ocean.” His mother stepped close to him and glared. “You know that Camilla was the perfect wife for Emilio. Glamorous and conscientious, the perfect hostess. You can’t choose a mate who has significant work, like being a doctor. A career that would make those other important obligations impossible to meet. Surely you see that!”
“What I see is a woman who refuses to open her eyes to the truth.” Mateo’s voice vibrated with anger. “Camilla made Emilio miserable! And that’s the kind of woman you would choose again for your other son? Camilla hurt my brother over and over again with her infidelity, having numerous affairs with all kinds of men, from politicians to horse trainers to men with trust funds who care only for their jet-setting lifestyle.”
Ana gasped. “That is not true!”
“It is true. Why do you think he got so reckless? Began base jumping from places he shouldn’t, and went paragliding on a day he knew was dangerously windy, only to be killed because of it!”
“It...it was just a terrible accident!”
“Yes, but he knew that mountain like the back of his hand, and I’m as sure as I am of my own name that it was one of Camilla’s hurtful affairs that filled him with the desperate need to go out paragliding on a day he knew he shouldn’t. He needed the escape from pain that paragliding always gave both of us. You pushed Emilio into a terrible marriage, just as you’re trying to push me to be who you want me to be. But I won’t accept that. I want the freedom to choose the life I want with the woman I love, and that woman is Miranda!” He moved away from his mother, tugging Miranda up from her seat to hold her close against his side. “We will be leaving tomorrow morning. I’ll be in touch from New York.”
And with that he marched back into the house, taking Miranda with him. Her heart pounded hard in her chest from the tense exchange and confusion from his words.
Of course he’d just been angry and upset. He didn’t mean what he’d said about her being the woman he loved. She knew that. And yet there’d been something about the way he’d said it—something about the timbre of his voice and the look in his eyes when he’d wrapped his arm around her that seemed to say he had meant it.
Could that be possible? Could he really have come to care for her the way she had for him, even though they’d spent mere days together? Surely that was just wishful thinking on her part.
“I’m so sorry, Miranda,” he said through gritted teeth as he led her through the house. “I would never have brought you here if I’d known how bad it would be for you. And even after you diagnosed my father’s hypoglycemia and took care of him! My mother should be ashamed.”
“She’s suffering, Mateo.” Miranda wrapped her arm around his waist and gave it a squeeze as they walked side by side toward the stairs leading to the room where she’d changed into her gown. “I’ve been thinking about how hard all this must be for her, how scary to feel somewhat alone now. Your father is sick and you all know the prognosis for his future is grim. She’s lost a son that she loved.”
“And I lost a brother that I loved. That’s not an excuse to act horribly to someone.”
“People do and say things in times of deep stress that they might not otherwise,” she said quietly.
He came to a stop. “You amaze me.” He grasped her shoulders and pulled her hard against him, his eyes still angry but looking at her searchingly, too. “Another example of how sweet and special and wonderful you are. Trying to understand and forgive someone who’s treated you badly, instead of feeling angry and resentful. You did it with Vanessa, too, and your father. It’s just one more reason why I’ve come to love you.”
Her heart felt like it stopped beating completely. She stared up at him, trying to see if he truly meant the words that seemed impossible. Impossibly wonderful. Had he said it just because he was feeling emotional? Upset with his mother and with the situation he faced?
“Love me?”
“Yes, love you.” He kissed her long and hard, and through it she could feel a passion that made her legs wobble, tightly interwoven with clear anger and distress. “I want our engagement to be real, Miranda. I want to make a life with you in New York, far away from here and my parents.”
“Mateo, you...you don’t mean that.” Miranda’s chest constricted so hard she couldn’t breathe. “You’re just feeling frustrated with everything, and will feel different tomorrow when you’ve got a little distance from your mother to understand her better.”
“I do mean it. And there’s something that you don’t understand.” His hands gripped her shoulders. “I told you that my parents never thought highly of me, the way they did Emilio. But now that I’m all they’ve got, suddenly they want me to come home. If I come back here for good, I’ll be surrounded by the knowledge, every day, that I’m not good enough to take his place. I’m just not. I never have been.”
“Of course you are,” she protested, finding it unimaginable that he seemed to truly believe it. “Why do you say that?”
“Because I’ve never been the son to them that Emilio was. I wasn’t here for my brother when he needed me most.” He pressed his mouth to hers for another hard kiss. “I know I don’t deserve you, but for the first time in my life I want to share it with someone. Share it with you. Forever.”
Oh, God. She wanted to believe it. So much. She searched his eyes, trying to figure out what was really happening here. To see if tomorrow he’d regret his declaration of love, his claim that he wanted a forever-after with her. What she saw in their dark, smoldering depths sent cautious joy surging to her heart.
Heat. Shimmering desire. And the same glow of love that had slowly, insistently crept into every pore, every inch of her being over the past few days.
“I don’t know what to think,” she whispered. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Then let me show you how I’m feeling. Let me take you back to the guest house and convince you I mean every word.”
He moved toward a side door that led into the dark night, heading quickly toward the small house as the stars twinkled above them.
Gulping in the crisp air, excitement surged through Miranda’s veins, and her stomach flipped inside out. “Show” her how he was feeling? That could only mean one thing, couldn’t it?
He pushed open the front door and, seeming like he was in a hurry, backed her into the bedroom and kicked the door closed behind them. “I don’t expect Paula or anyone to show up, but just in case, hmm?”
The hard edge of anger had left his voice. The low rumble that replaced it was so full of seduction and promise, Miranda trembled in anticipation. He shoved off the coat she hadn’t even noticed she was still wearing and tossed it on a chair before turning her around. His warm fingers swept her hair from the back of her neck and she felt his lips follow, pressing tiny kisses to her nape as he unzipped the beautiful dress.
“Mateo...” She had no idea what to say after his name, but even if she had, all ability to speak disappeared as cool air slipped across her bare back inch by inch, his fingers following in a shivery path across her skin. Finally fully unzipped, his hands gently shoved the dress to the floor with a swish. His lips moved to her bare shoulders as he turned her to face him again, his dark eyes glittering as he slowly, excruciatingly ran his finger along the lacy top of her bra.
Part of her wanted him to just keep going, but she didn’t want to be the only one standing there in her u
nderwear. She reached for his bow-tie and gave it a tug, sliding it from his collar to drop on the floor before reaching for his shirt. Struggling with the small buttons, she couldn’t help making a frustrated noise, and with a heated smile he swept her hands aside.
“Let me.”
“All right,” she breathed. “That leaves me free to work on the rest of your clothes.”
Another chuckle morphed abruptly into a moan as she quickly loosened his belt, undid his pants, pushed them to his ankles, then pressed the palm of her hand to feel the hard erection tenting his underwear.
“Dio mio. Slow down.” He kicked his pants legs off at the same time he yanked off his shirt. “We have all night.”
“I’m feeling in a hurry.” And, wow, was that ever true. All worries about how he truly felt about her were forgotten as, with the sexiest smile she’d ever seen, he drew her close and kissed her. First on her mouth then her cheeks and throat then back to her mouth, speaking melodic Spanish words between each one, until she was gasping and clutching his bare shoulders to keep from slithering to the floor.
His hands had tantalizingly stroked and caressed her skin as they’d kissed, exploring her shoulder blades, her hips, her ribs, until one finally moved to unhook her bra, and he drew it off to toss it somewhere. His hands lifted to cup her breasts, his thumbs sliding softly across her nipples.
He lifted his fathomless dark gaze to hers. “You have the most beautiful breasts I’ve ever seen,” he whispered. “Ever touched. Ever kissed.” He lowered his hot mouth and slowly ran his tongue over each mound and Miranda held him close, resting her cheek against his soft hair, amazed at the intense connection she felt with this man after mere days spent together.