“Not until all repairs are complete, everyone is accounted for, and we’ve had a chance to collect ourselves,” replied John. He needed to take stock of their situation. John wasn't sure he had a place on the ship anymore after his appalling behavior during the battle.
The command staff watched John step onto the lift. Kevin looked over at Julie. He too could see the commander was not happy.
“You heard the man. Let’s get to work,” said Alex’sis.
After sixteen hours of grueling work John laid on the couch in his office, his face covered in sweat. He worked side by side with the repair crews, pulling twisted metal and debris from the damaged sections of the ship. He assisted the medical teams reach those trapped behind or beneath the rubble in the damaged areas. All throughout the cleanup, people were patting John on the back, congratulating him on a job well done. Despite incurring some casualties the ship and crew had survived an attack from multiple Screen vessels. Such a feat wasn't conceivable a day ago. EXODUS had accomplished what no other human ship had ever done.
But as more people congratulated John, the worse he felt. He couldn’t help but feel like a complete fraud. His actions during the battle were reckless and uncoordinated. For John, it was only dumb luck that they prevailed. He was so scared to lose, no, to die that he threw out his military training in a desperate move to achieve victory. As the crew celebrated surviving the Screen attack John believed that he had failed personally and professionally. All he wanted to do was hand over command of EXODUS to Julie, take a mid-range shuttle back to Earth and face whatever consequences were awaiting him. His dream of commanding a starship seemed to be nothing more than a rubble of smoldering debris.
The door chime rang and John looked over at the door. He wasn’t in the mood for company and decided to ignore the ring, figuring whoever was there would take the hint and leave. But the door chimed again and he decided to quickly dismiss whoever was there.
“Come in,” he said annoyed. When he saw Julie walk in he sighed. She was the last person he wanted to talk to right now.
“What is it?” he asked. He didn’t even bother to sit up on the couch for her. She handed him a computer print out.
“It’s a brief summary of our casualties and ship repair status,” she answered. “The final tally is three people dead, sixteen wounded.” John noticed on the page that the three dead people were Interceptor pilots whose fighters were incinerated by the Screen particle beams. “Repairs are almost completed. We should be ready to jump in less than twelve hours.”
“Yeah.” That was all John could muster. Julie could tell by his body language that he was upset.
“You've been in a funk since the attack when you should be pleased. We’ll be out of the solar system in less than a day and before you know it we'll be out there exploring the galaxy.”
"The ship will, but I won't."
"What do you mean? What's wrong?"
John sat up. “What's wrong is I completely fucked up out there. My performance was miserable.”
“Miserable performance? We defeated the Screen, with two of their ships that we've never encountered before.”
“By unloading all our weapons in one attack. Not exactly a move a halfway decent tactician would perform. I panicked and let my emotions get the better of me. I got scared Julie.”
Julie was almost taken aback. So that’s why he was acting so depressed. Boy, after all these years he still managed to surprise her. How could she have ever thought of replacing him as the ship commander? She plopped down on the couch next to him. Neither looked at one another, only the floor. Julie couldn't hold it in any longer and started to laugh.
“I don’t believe it. The great John Roberts actually admits he’s not perfect. If only Billy was here to see this.”
John gave her a nasty look. He never expected any sympathy from her, but he didn’t expect her to kick him while he was down. “I’m glad you’re savoring this moment.”
“I’m sorry, really.” Julie composed herself. “Listen, I’ll admit that what you did was unorthodox.”
“Unorthodox? That’s the same stunt I’d pull during battle simulations just to get a rise out of the instructors.”
“And show them that sometimes the best move is the one least unexpected.” Julie put her hand on John’s knee. “And you know what? It worked. We destroyed the Screen fleet and have a ship that's still intact. What matters is that we won.”
“But I should have held it together. I've always looked down on people who let fear override their senses. But that’s exactly what I let happen to me! Those are emotions a commander needs to control.”
“How do you think I felt? I wanted to crawl into a hole and close my eyes. And just think how the rest of the crew felt. No one expected to survive. You’re too hard on yourself John. You did great and I'm proud of you and you should be too. You met all the objectives you set out for us. We made it through the solar system without firing on any TERRA ship and survived two Screen attacks. Everything from here on out is going to be new to us and we’re going to make our share of mistakes. But if we lean on each other we’ll get through it. You've already proven yourself to me John and I now know I can depend on you.”
John only nodded slightly.
“I’ve been approached by people all day telling me what a remarkable job they thought you did. You’ve earned the crew’s respect, not because of Admiral Johnson, but because you were a good leader. Your actions out there demonstrated you belong in the command chair.”
John looked at Julie and gave her a sincere smile. He thought about what to say, but he could only come up with this.
“So, should we commemorate this moment with a kiss? No tongue of course.” Julie shoved him away.
“And some things never change.”
“Hey listen, I’m kidding. Despite how I acted before I did listen to what you said about me earlier. Thanks.” He looked over to his desk and the platinum picture frame with no picture but two names engraved on the frame itself. Julie had recognized it from their dorm and decided it was time to ask him about the frame.
“Can I ask you who Sam and Selva are?” She had asked him only one time before when they first moved to Dorm Row. But John never answered her, never even acknowledged the question back then. She assumed it had to do with his family. He never discussed them and Julie didn't know anything about his past.
John got up from the couch and took the picture frame off his desk. He looked at it for a long moment, remembering events of his past. He looked at Julie and felt it was time to let someone in.
“My parents died when I was little. I had an older sister who took care of me after they were gone. But when I was twelve she left home and disappeared. I have no idea why she left and never saw her again.”
“I’m sorry,” said Julie sympathetically. No wonder he was such an independent person. He had lost so many people close to him. “So are these your parents?”
John just smiled. “Sam was my dog and Selva was my bird.” Julie didn’t expect that answer.
“Your pets?”
John sat back on the couch. “It was tough when Nicole left. I didn’t know what to do. I certainly wasn’t about to go to a foster home. So I stayed home. Our house was situated on a huge lot so it wasn’t hard to maintain the illusion that my sister was still there. But it was hard being there by myself and I got emotional support from the most unlikely of places.”
Julie looked at the picture frame again before handing it back to John. He ran his hand over the three names on the frame. The third name didn't catch Julie's eye, as she assumed the x situated in the lower center of the frame was a design mark. John chose not to clarify that to her. “I think they knew how hard it was for me. I could talk to them about anything and they would listen.”
“You’re lucky to have them.”
John nodded. “I lost Sam the year before I came to the Academy. I think she knew I was leaving and I couldn’t take her with me to New York. It was
hard when she died.”
“And Selva?”
“She was a Severe Macaw, supposed to live for sixty or seventy years. I took her to a Buddist bird sanctuary in Sedona, Arizona when I left for the Academy. She died two years ago.” Tears started to well up in his eyes. Julie could see how much they meant to John. She patted him on the back.
“I think they’d be so proud of you right now.”
“Yeah,” He looked at his executive officer. “Thanks Julie.”
“Sure thing,” she replied as the door chimed.
“Come in,” said John, reining in his emotions and wiping the tears from his eyes. Bret quickly entered.
“Commander. Commander,” said Bret. “Do you have a moment?”
“Sure,” replied John. “What is it?”
“I finished analyzing our data from our first Screen encounter. I ran the data through a multispectral analyzer and picked up a signal that the fighter sent out of the solar system just before we destroyed it. The signal was faint but had a complex frequency algorithm indicating that a significant amount of data was sent in the transmission. My theory is that the ship sent data about its encounter with us to its compatriots.”
"That would make sense," said Julie. "When they knew a fighter couldn’t stop us they sent two larger ships for the second attack.”
Bret nodded. “I ran the same analysis of our last fight and picked up the same transmissions being sent out by one of the larger ships.”
“Oh shit,” said John. He was afraid of something like that happening.
“Why are you so worried?” asked Julie.
“I fired all of EXODUS’ weapons to destroy the larger ships. If they were scanning us during the fight and collected data about the ship's capabilities, it would be valuable information to their superiors. They’ll know what this ship is capable of now and will adapt for our next encounter. They may not be so easy to defeat next time.”
Both Julie and Bret realized John had a valid point. The Screen had changed their tactics in their second battle with them by sending more powerful vessels. With additional information about EXODUS now in their possession, chances were that the Screen would change their tactics again in order to defeat the ship. The Screen had been caught off guard twice. They wouldn’t make the same mistake a third time.
“They may have more information about us, but we also have more information about them," said Julie. "The data we gathered on our two encounters should be immensely helpful in improving our defenses against them. We’ll just have to adapt more quickly and stay one step ahead of them.”
John nodded in agreement. “Bret, was there any chance you were able to track where the signal went?"
“I’m afraid not.”
So much for getting an easy trail to a Screen base of operation or even their home world. “Is there anything else?"
“One more thing. It’s about what happened during our battle with the Screen.” Bret handed John a paper with his findings. “Just prior to the fight I picked up a very small power reading coming from the solar system sensor net. I thought at first it was a sensor glitch generated from the Screen weapons. But I crossed checked the data and verified the reading was legitimate.”
“What is this power spike you detected?” asked Julie. John handed her the paper.
“Someone activated the sensor net,” said John.
“I think someone back home was monitoring our activities out here,” said Bret.
Julie didn't think anything unusual about it and immediately dismissed the report. “So TERRA was monitoring us. No surprise there.”
“But the sensor net was reactivated minutes after we picked up the Screen approaching us,” explained Bret. “How would they know exactly when to reactivate it? It’s too coincidental.”
John stepped over behind his desk to look out the window. “What are you saying?”
“With the sensor net out TERRA would have no idea the Screen had appeared. The only way they would know to activate the net at the right time is if the Screen alerted them or someone on this ship told them.”
Julie immediately stood up upon hearing this. “You’re suggesting that a crew member somehow sent a message to TERRA and alerted them of our activities?”
“I don’t know. It’s just a theory.”
“But your instincts are telling you that. Otherwise you wouldn’t be saying it,” said John.
Bret debated carefully before revealing what he knew. Admiral Johnson had sworn him to secrecy, as it had the potential to create distrust and dissent within the EXODUS Project.
“A couple years ago, there were rumors going around that a spy had infiltrated the EXODUS Project,” said Bret. “Admiral Johnson and I investigated it but we couldn’t come up with anything and eventually the rumor went away.”
“Did Admiral Johnson suspect anyone in particular?” asked Julie.
“If he did, he never told me. I'm not even sure how the rumor started. We couldn't even verify if the so-called spy came from TERRA or the government.”
“If there was a spy TERRA would have known in advance of our plan to launch and have been able to stop us,” said Julie. “It wouldn’t make sense to let us go only to put all that effort to try and stop us.”
“But we can’t dismiss the possibility either. You're right, it wouldn't make sense, but if there is a spy on board we need to verify who it is and how he or she is contacting TERRA,” said John. “Bret, I want you to start exploring means by which someone could communicate with TERRA without using the ship's communications systems.”
“Yes commander.”
“I want this to stay between the three of us for now. We don’t talk about this to anyone. If there is a spy I don’t want them to get wind of our suspicions.”
“Agreed,” said Julie.
"Anything else?" said John.
"That's all, sir," said Bret.
"Thank you. Dismissed."
Bret nodded and left Julie and John alone in the office.
"Should we let Lieutenant Brandus in on this?" asked Julie. "She's had the most contact with the crew and may be helpful."
"We'll keep this under wraps for now," said John.
"She won't like it that she wasn't included."
"I know, but it's my call. I'll take the brunt of the lieutenant's anger when the time comes."
In this instance Julie was glad not to be the ship commander. She wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of Alex'sis' wraith when John chose to reveal this issue to her.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“Well, I think you’re ready to be checked out,” said Doctor Myers, looking at the bone scans of his patient. The recovering fighter pilot, sitting up on his bed, said nothing. He had kept quiet since the battle, refusing to speak to anyone. Realizing that everything John had told him was true, the pilot wondered what would become of him. As he dwelled on his fate a familiar voice interrupted his thoughts.
“Good, because I just got quarters assigned to him,” said John entering the medical bay. He briefly looked at the pilot before walking past him and to Myers by the surgical control console.
“Commander! Here to see our patient off?”
“Maybe,” said John in a low tone, so that the pilot would not hear him. “How is he?”
“Physically he’s fine. Except for some remaining scraps he’s pretty much recovered.”
“And psychologically?”
“He hasn’t said a word since the battle. I can’t say what it is, whether its fear or uncertainty what’s going to happen to him.”
John looked over at the pilot. He knew he would have to talk to him, make one last try at trying to reason with him, make him understand what they were trying to do here. Readying himself mentally, John walked over to the bed.
“The doctor says you’re ready to be discharged.”
“You have quarters ready for me?” said the pilot. “That means you’re not sending me back to Mars.”
“No, we won't be taking you bac
k. I’m sorry, but it's too great a risk. Our sensors show that TERRA has amassed the bulk of their fleet around Mars. If we went back they would almost certainly try to retake the ship from us. And the longer we stay here the more likely the Screen will return with a bigger armada.”
“So I’m trapped.”
“I know you never expected this and if I could I would send you back home. But we both have to make the best of this situation.”
“How?”
“For starters, you can become leader of Virgo Fighter Squadron,” said John. “The group lost their squad leader in the fight. You have the experience to take over the group.”
“Why would I want to help terrorists?”
“I don’t think you look at us as terrorists anymore,” said John. How could he? The ship had gone head to head against the Screen by choice instead of running at the first instance. “If you’ve been watching what we’ve been doing you know that our intentions are not malicious.” He could tell the pilot was thinking about it and weighing his options.
"So what exactly are you planning to do?"
"To find out all that we can about the Screen," replied John. "I know this galaxy doesn't consist of just humans and Screen. There has to be other alien civilizations out there who can give us information about the Screen and maybe help us. With luck we'll be able to locate the Screen homeworld, find out what they have planned for us and stop them."
“And why should I follow you? You’re just a kid.”
“Who happens to be the only ship commander in history to defeat the Screen in battle." The response was purely defensive and John was aware of it as the words flowed from his mouth. He had to stop being so defensive. This wasn't the Academy anymore. There were no professors or superintendents out to get him. He was working with people on a starship and had to be diplomatic if this ship was going to run smoothly.
John chose his next words carefully. "Look, everyone here has chosen to follow me. I can’t tell you why you should too. All I can do is ask you to trust me.”
Again, the pilot weighed his options. This kid, whoever he was, had somehow led this crew to victory against the Screen. And since the battle he had heard people talking how much they respected John and the confidence they had in him. He had led the crew to success and they were willing to stand behind him.
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