“Don’t.”
Milligan stepped forward. The concern that was in his eyes only a moment ago slowly melted away and was replaced with raw, hot lust. I don’t think I had ever seen that in a man’s eyes before, not quite in the way he held it. It was pure. It was raw. It was powerful.
“Milligan… I…” I started to say, but my mind went completely blank. I wanted him. I wanted him so badly that my mind was a blur.
But I couldn’t do this. No matter how much I wanted to. Destiny was still lying in that hospital room. I couldn’t do this right now.
With much regret, I shook my head at him, unable to say the words.
“Carrie. You are so beautiful.” He stepped closer to the shower curtain. I was standing at the far end of the bath so that the water didn’t wet the towel through. He moved closer, edging me back towards the water, mindless of the droplets that were landing on his immaculate black shirt. He reached forward without taking his eyes off of my face to unwrap the towel from my trembling body.
“I can’t.” I said, my voice sounding weak.
“Yes. You can.” His voice was husky, full of sexual intent. He stepped back a pace to kick off his shoes and then stepped into the still pounding shower with me, fully clothed. His carefully measured steps forced me backwards until the water rained down on both of us, drenching his expensive shirt and trousers within seconds, plastering them to his sculptured body.
He didn’t say another word. He didn’t have to. His eyes told me everything that I needed to know. He wanted this. I wanted this. He wanted me and he wanted me right now. I didn’t want to stop him.
He was perfect. He was just perfect for me. He was tall, tanned and tattooed. I hadn’t had a glimpse of them the night before, but his arms were covered in ink sleeves and his back and chest had intricate designs racing over them. I trailed over them lightly with my fingertips, marvelling at the taut tension of his body.
His hand ran through the length of my wet hair, caressing my back gently as he leaned in to kiss me. Milligan’s touch seemed to brush away the guilt I was feeling, taking me over until I was filled only with lust for him. How could I be there, enjoying Milligan’s wildly sexy body, when Dee was still lying in the hospital? I didn’t give a damn. I couldn’t give it a moments more thought as the rest of his clothes seemed to melt away from him and we were pressed skin to skin, exploring one another’s bodies with wanton abandon.
My skin tingled at his touch, my stomach clenching deliciously. Milligan knew what he was doing. Every touch measured to extract the extreme amount of pleasure.
Running my fingers across his slick skin as the water pounded our bodies, I marvelled at the perfection. His muscles contracted at my touch, making the ink designs on his body move as if with a mind of their own. It was mesmerising.
Throwing my head back as Milligan’s lips ran down my body, between my breasts, down to circle my navel, I tried to claw at the tiled wall, knowing that my legs were going to buckle beneath me. Grabbing my leg, he hitched one knee up over his shoulder as he knelt before me and I had to grab hold of his hair to keep from toppling over. As soon as his tongue touched my core, I convulsed around him.
Never before had that happened to me so quickly. Being with Milligan made me lose my mind, my sense of being. It was a scary thought, but one that had no place in the here and now. All I could think of was about the pleasure.
Milligan kissed my cheek tenderly as he wrapped a huge fluffy towel around me, much in contrast to how he had been throwing me around like a rag doll only moments before. I couldn’t stop looking at him. He was everything I could ever want in a man, everything I had ever needed. Tall, dark and dangerous.
He wasn’t Hollywood handsome. There was something about him that was much darker and rougher than that. The ink designs that adorned his skin helped to give him that edge. Plus, it was only a little thing, but I had never been with a man who had his nipple pierced before. After several tentative minutes of exploring it, I was amused and intrigued by the effect it had on him.
I had never felt anything like this before. Sure, I’d had plenty of good sex before, but it was nothing compared to what Milligan could do to me. He had now ruined me for all other men. I’d never known that it could be like that. Sex with him was along the lines of the stuff you only ever read about. Mind blowing.
It wasn’t like we had actually done anything out of the ordinary, but it was the way he did it. The way he touched me. The way he set my flesh on fire. It was Milligan. I burned for him.
I had always told Destiny in the past that she shouldn’t mix up sex with real emotions. She went out looking to hook up with a guy so that she could feel like she was worth something. But, if she had ever had an experience like the one I had just had with Milligan, then I could totally understand her confusion. It had only been sex, but on so many levels, it had been so much more. He had managed to confuse me mind, body and soul.
I looked up at him and watched as he stared down at me with his wet hair dripping a tattoo on my chest. I glanced over at the puddle of wet clothes that lay on the floor. After a moment, his gaze followed mine.
“Well, I don’t think I thought that one through properly, did I?”
I laughed. I couldn’t help it. It felt good. I finally felt relaxed. I no longer had a headache and I genuinely felt good. “I’m sure that Harper will have something that will fit you.”
“You sure he won’t mind me borrowing his clothes?”
“I can text him and ask him if you like, but I’m sure that he’d be happier seeing you in some of his clothes as opposed to walking around the city naked, or in one of my dresses.”
“You have a good point there. It wouldn’t do to be distracting the nursing staff while they’re tending to your friend.” He rose one eyebrow at me and smirked.
That was when it hit me like a physical blow. Destiny. How the hell could I be standing there naked in my bathroom, having mind blowing frantic sex with a virtual stranger when we didn’t even know what was wrong with her? What the hell was I thinking? What kind of friend was I? It was wrong. It was sick. What had I been thinking?
“Carrie?”
I looked up at him. Sex really suited him, there was no denying that. If he had been a flower, he would have been in full bloom right now. That was totally the wrong kind of analogy, seeing as Milligan would never have been likened to anything quite as dainty and feminine as a flower. He was pure man, through and through. I’d never really met anyone quite as masculine as him. He really did make me feel like the ‘little lady’ he was looking for. I don’t mean that in a bad way, it was just that he was a very dominant and powerful presence in my life already.
“Carrie? What’s wrong?”
I smiled up at him sadly. I didn’t want anything to ruin what was starting between us, but reality always seemed to find a way to mess up all the good things in my life, tainting them. “I was just thinking about Destiny.”
He grabbed one of the smaller towels off the pile on the vanity unit and knelt down naked in front of me. It was then, all of a sudden, that I realised I was naked and a chill of embarrassment ran through me. He didn’t seem to notice as he reverently started to pat down my skin, drying it inch by inch. The embarrassment faded quickly as the gentle sensation gave way to the sensual feeling that he brought out in me.
“There’s no point in worrying about that now. We’ll find out more when we get back there and find out from Harper what’s been happening.”
It was kind of hard to concentrate on what he was saying as the towel was starting to travel up the inside of my thigh.
I cleared my throat and took a step back from him, wrapping a large towel around my body. I felt sick with the swirl of emotions running through me. The nearness of Milligan seemed to cloud my senses, but the reality of Destiny’s situation kept prickling through my mind. The happiness and the fear warred within me.
“It’s not as easy as all that.” Tears started to prick my eyes.
r /> “Just try and enjoy the moment. Don’t ever feel guilty for having pleasure.” Milligan stood up and stepped forward, trailing a light touch down my bare arm.
I couldn’t move anywhere in the tiny bathroom, and what’s more, I didn’t want to. The yearning was overtaking the guilt once again as Milligan filled my vision.
I closed my eyes to gather myself. “But that’s the thing. I do feel guilty.” I shivered at his touch and guilt flooded me further. What the hell was I doing? What was wrong with me? My mind was turning to mush and I seemed helpless to stop it.
“Do I need to fuck the guilt out of you, Carrie?” Milligan grinned menacingly.
I wasn’t actually too sure if he was joking or not. What worried me more was that I would happily put off going to the hospital for a few more hours just to spend more time in bed with Milligan. The time in the shower hadn’t been enough for me and the ache was screaming for more.
But I couldn’t do that. I had Destiny to think of. And Harper needed some rest and he wouldn’t leave her there alone. I couldn’t do that to either of them. I felt awful that I was already late going to the hospital to relieve him. Not that Milligan was entirely to blame. After all, it wasn’t like I tried to fend him off with a stick. I’d been a willing partner, more than willing. But, what sort of person did that make me? Sleeping with a stranger when my friends needed me?
Milligan laughed softly. “Relax. You haven’t done anything wrong. Don’t beat yourself up.”
“So why does it feel like I have?”
Milligan stood back a bit and readjusted the towel that now covered his waist, but that little bit of cloth didn’t cover much and it was making me hard to concentrate and keep my resolve. The hard lines of his body, the taut muscles and that damned sexy V seemed to be calling out to me. I shook my head slightly to rid myself of the thoughts and looked away from him.
“You know what this is, don’t you? It’s a form of survivor’s guilt. You aren’t the one that is laid up in hospital and it’s eating you up inside that you’re able to live your life and have some fun.”
“Live my life? It only happened last night. That makes no sense.” I protested.
Milligan carried on as if I hadn’t spoken. “Sex is one of the most natural things in the world. It’s as natural as breathing. It is the body and minds way of telling you that you are still alive and kicking. It’s the most natural way to prove that you are still alive.”
“Milligan, Destiny’s not dead. I’ve got nothing to prove, to myself or anyone else.” I dragged in a ragged breath. “You don’t think she’s going to die, do you?” We had no idea what was happening, so nothing could be ruled out. I knew that the fear must have been evident in my eyes as he knelt down in front of me once again, taking my hands firmly in his and squeezing them reassuringly.
“No. I don’t think that. That’s not what I meant and you know that. You’re trying to twist my words to suit your own guilt. Well, I’m not going to let you do that. We did what we did because we are insanely attracted to one another. We did it because we both wanted to. We both needed it, for our own reasons. We both wanted it. You cannot try and tell me otherwise. I was there, remember?” Milligan smirked again and cocked his head towards the shower when he had me panting with wanton lust only moments before.
I blushed like a beetroot. I couldn’t help it. I wasn’t the most outspoken woman that you would ever come across and despite how I had just behaved with him, I was usually quite shy and reserved when I first started dating someone, taking the time to get to know them before diving into bed. Not that Milligan would have believed that of me now. But, I guess that after everything that had happened last night and how life had thrown us together so suddenly, this thing between us was starting on a whole other level and I couldn’t compare it to anything I had experienced in my past.
Milligan was nothing like anyone I had ever been with before. I couldn’t say no to him. I couldn’t resist him. He threw all rational thought out the door. My body took over from my brain, relishing in the feelings he brought out in me.
It was scary. I wasn’t that person. He brought out a whole new side to me, one that I had never seen before. One that I wasn’t sure I liked. My mind blurred when I was near him. I have to admit, it kind of scared me.
“Had we better get dressed then?” he asked, looking adorably sad at the prospect.
“Well, as you said, if we turned up at the hospital butt naked, we would probably do a lot of people more harm than good.” I quipped, chuckling.
“I guess you’re right about that. It is a damn shame, though.” He said as his eyes began to roam over my body again, willing me with his mind to drop the towel.
Milligan reached forward slowly to hook a finger in the top of the towel that was wrapped around me, pulling me in close against his hard chest. He kissed me and I was helpless as I melted against the heat of his skin, fingers running through his still damp hair and over the taut muscles of his chest and coming to rest on his piercings. As he started to unravel the towel from my body, reality flashed through my mind and I playfully skipped away from him.
“Hey!” he protested.
I shook my head regretfully, but grinned at the same time. The expression on his face was priceless. He seemed as shocked as I did that I was able to refuse his advances. “If we start that up again, we’ll never get out of here and Harper is going to need to come home for some sleep, too.”
“Hmmm.” Was all that he said as he bit his lip and looked over my body one last time. “Maybe we can find a spare room at the hospital.”
I laughed at him, knowing that was never going to happen. I was all for adventure but that was pushing the boundaries of decency in my opinion.
“I’ll go and see what clothes I can find for you to wear.” I walked out of the bathroom, through my bedroom and over into Harper’s room. It was just lucky that they were roughly the same kind of build else Milligan would be going home in wet clothes.
“How about these?” I called out to him as I scooped up a pile of clothes for him to choose from and turned around, dropping them in shock. I didn’t hear him follow me, but he was standing close enough that I could feel his breath on my face. Milligan grinned at me.
“You scared me.”
“Why? I thought you knew I was there.”
I shook my head at him, my heart still racing. I thrust the clothes into his arms. “See what you think of these. I need to go and get ready.”
I scooted by him quickly and went back into my bedroom again, shutting the door firmly behind me this time. I needed a little privacy to get myself together again after what had just happened between us. I needed to catch a breath.
This wasn’t me. This wasn’t what I did. There was something about Milligan that drew me out of myself. I had to get my head back on track and think of Destiny. She needed me right now. That was more important than getting laid.
I pulled on a pair of worn-in jeans and a faded band tee-shirt. Grabbing my Converse and a hoody, I pulled a brush through my hair and twisted it on the top of my head. I skipped up putting on make-up entirely. I was going to be spending the day mostly sitting around a hospital waiting room, no one would care what I looked like.
I didn’t even feel the need to make an effort to try and impress Milligan, either. He had already seen me all puffy faced from crying, and he’d seen me naked in the shower for Christ’s sake. What was the point in putting on a mask now? He’d seen all there was to see. I did take the time to spritz myself with my favourite perfume on the way out, though. This was a new thing that we had going on between us and I didn’t want him to think that I was a total slob.
I walked out of the bathroom and found Milligan standing in the living room, checking out the DVD collection. He looked up when I entered the room and I had to try and hold back a grin. Harper’s jeans were a smidge too short for him and they didn’t really match the dressy, expensive shoes he was wearing. But, hey, at least he was dry.
&n
bsp; “Who do all of these belong to? Harper?” He asked as he waved a hand towards the shelves, indicating that he was referring to the rows and rows of martial arts and action films.
I laughed. “Most of those are mine actually. Harper likes to actually train, I prefer to watch.”
“Really? Sounds interesting.”
I realised what I’d said and instantly turned the shade of a very ripe tomato. “I didn’t mean…”
Milligan laughed. “I knew what you meant.” He turned to look back at the DVD’s. “I loved this one. You’re a woman after my own heart.”
I picked up my phone and put it safely in my bag. “Are you still sure that you don’t mind dropping me off at the hospital? I don’t want to be a pain.”
“Seeing as that is where I’m heading, it would be kind of stupid of me not to take you with me.”
“Don’t you have somewhere that you need to be? Business to take care of?”
“Nope. Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest. Even for me. I’ll be back in work tomorrow. It can all wait until then.”
“Yeah, me too, I guess.”
I wasn’t too sure what me and Harper were going to do about work and Destiny. There was no way that I could afford to take any time off work at the moment. We were especially busy and I knew that my boss, Steve, would throw a complete fit if I even suggested it. Harper was in the same position. He was much in demand. I also knew that the gym he worked at was down a personal trainer and the extra sessions were falling to Harper until they found someone new to fill in. We’d have to figure out something. I didn’t want to leave Dee alone in there by herself for too long.
Saying that, though, we still didn’t know what was going to happen with her. Hopefully, she would come around today and we wouldn’t have to worry about the rest of it. It was something to hope for, anyway.
“So, what do you do?” Milligan asked as he picked up his car keys, glancing over at me as I laced my shoes.
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