by April Lust
Then her sense came back to her, but the stone wall she'd built around this herself was quickly crumbling away, and she couldn’t keep it up for long. She had to have her answers no matter what – she wasn’t just going to accept this. She was still hurt that he had left her. And while it was great that he had saved her, she was pretty sure she could’ve done that by herself. It would’ve at least saved her some of the mental anguish.
He reached a hand out to her, dragging his palm lightly across her arm. It was barely a touch at all, and he was worried she would pull away from him as he touched her. She didn’t.
“No.” He shook his head.
Seeing him vulnerable was making her believe everything he said to her, which was good. She needed to. As much as she hated having to cope with this, she knew that the alternative wouldn’t be any better. She couldn’t live without Darren. Whatever had happened between the two of them had bonded them together, and she couldn’t imagine just being without him.
She tried to hide her smirk.
She was enjoying letting him make a fool out of himself, and this probably wasn’t something he was likely to do again any time soon. As soon as he noticed that they were both okay, he was going to go back to his usual tough guy veneer.
“V,” he continued. His eyes were getting a little watery, too, and Victoria’s heart pounded at the idea that he might actually…cry? “Look –”
This was too much.
She’d liked it at first, but now the parts of her that felt vindicated just felt sad and maybe even a little guilty. At the same time, she just felt like this entire thing was becoming some kind of train wreck.
“Don’t make an ass of yourself, Darren,” she said. The roles were switching now, but she liked it. If he was going to go sob and cry to her, then she was going to have to play a tougher hand. It might just make him go back to his usual self. The usual Darren was insufferable, but it was still infinitely better than the Darren that was a sobbing, shaking mess. She didn’t want to see that Darren, not right now. Not out here on the street where anyone could see them – that was supposed to happen in privacy.
She struggled to keep her mind from wandering back to the bedroom. There was a time for that, and this wasn’t it. That wasn’t an issue, though – as soon as she spoke, Darren looked like he forced himself to pull things together. And then his expression changed. It wasn’t like he was hurt, no, he looked…
Like he was enjoying it.
“You act like you didn’t love it.”
Her eyes instantly went to his eyebrows, checking to see if he had one raised. He did.
“And if I claimed not to?” His hand wasn’t anywhere near her now, and she longed for him to at least be touching her in some way.
“Then I’d ask you how you plan on dealing with this mess by yourself.” His hands still weren’t making a move as if to get near her. “Because you can't deny that it is a mess.”
She also couldn’t deny that she was considering just making do with everything that had been thrown at her, and leaving on her own. Maybe she would stay in the city, maybe she wouldn’t. Either way, it seemed like things weren’t working out for her the way she wanted them to, and Darren couldn’t help. The way he was looking at her – and talking to her – made it seem like he thought he could, though.
“You’re thinking about it, aren’t you?”
His words brought her back down to earth.
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, but – “
She didn’t hear the rest of what he was saying. She was focused on staring at a building just ahead of her. Her shoulders started to shake; she was afraid that she would start to cry. This wasn’t a good time to cry – and it probably wasn’t the best move to cry around Darren – but he was making her emotional, and she had to find a way to express it. And tears might do that.
She stared at the lines painted up and down the wall, waiting for him to reach out and touch her. He had to. She wasn’t sure how she would feel if he didn’t.
She didn’t have to worry about it. He moved closer to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and bringing her to him. It was almost like a hug; it would have been one if he’d just pulled her to him a little more, letting their bodies join. Instead, he just held onto her. The act was vulnerable without being too vulnerable, and it was comforting.
This was too weird.
She pulled away from him, and he immediately had a question for her, but she couldn’t even process it. She wasn’t in the mood to hear it. They were dragging this out too much. They needed to find a way to just get out what they needed to say, but there was no conceivable way they’d be able to pull that off with just words. There was only one thing she could do.
“Shut up and kiss me.”
His lips found hers as soon as the words left her mouth, the heat of his kiss rocking through her and making its way down her body. She curled her toes and reached for him, needing more of him. This kiss was everything that needed to be said between them, and everything that tried to bridge the issues they were having.
Victoria felt part of her heart lift up with him as they kissed. She put both of her arms around him, and he put one of his hands behind her head. Inching his fingers into her hair, he pushed her closer to him. His lips found hers again after a small slip, falling away from the crush of the kiss to say, “Let’s go for a drink.”
Chapter Twenty
Victoria
This was the last place in the world Victoria was expecting Darren to take her to, but when she thought about it, there was really no reason for her to be surprised. She hadn’t been to the bar in a while, and she was worried that her boss wasn’t going to be happy to see her. Even though it hadn’t really been so long since she’d been here, so much had happened since her last shift that she’d almost forgotten the bar’s name.
That didn’t mean she didn’t recognize the sign and the lights popping up all over the bar front, though. It felt like it had been months since her last visit, but the fact of the matter was that it had been only a week or so. It was the longest amount of time since she’d started working there that Victoria Parker had been away from this bar. Seeing it reminded her of everything that had happened, and of the fact that she had no job.
Her arms tightened around Darren's waist. She was behind him on the motorcycle again. She didn’t want to get up and run away, this time – but she was curious about what her old boss would have to say about it, and what her co-workers would think of her. Then she remembered that she didn’t have any co-workers, and that her boss had thrown her to the dogs to deal with all of this herself. If anything, it was primarily her boss’s fault that she even got stuck in this mess in the first place.
She squeezed Darren tight, trying to hug him before having to deal with this. She felt close to him, more attached. It probably had to do with the fact that he came back for her, and that he risked death doing it. She wasn’t mad anymore, and even the way the breeze tickled her hair as she rode on the back of the bike couldn’t faze her. Normally, it would bother her and she would struggle to force her hair to stay still. Now she didn’t really care; she felt close to Darren, and being so near to him was keeping her from being anxious.
If anything, the situation was kind of funny, in a really screwed up way. She didn’t think she would be able to deal with anything like this if it weren’t for Darren. And even though she was standing with Darren through this, this whole experience was only going to end up going one of two ways. Either she’d never be able to stomach anything like this ever again, and she’d become some type of sheltered woman. (She couldn’t picture this happening, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t a possibility.) Or she would stop caring about pretty much anything, and just be able to go with the flow of things – like Darren did. This was probably what was going to happen, and she wasn’t sure how to feel about it.
Darren hopped off of the bike first. Extending a hand to her in a show of overly dramatic gentlemanly manner
s, he pulled her up off of the bike without demanding that she make too much effort herself. She nudged at him playfully, hitting him in the side with her hip.
“I can do things myself, you know,” she said.
He retorted, “And here I thought I was the one going to save you like some kind of princess.”
“I could’ve gotten myself out of it,” she countered, taking his hand in hers after throwing her elbow out at him. “I just let you do it so it could help fuel your massive ego.”
He turned and shot her a look, one that was a combination of mock horror and pain mixed with one of complete arrogance – that is, the look he always wore. Then his face changed to something cornier, with the promise that he was about to say something lewd. No words escaped his mouth, although he did raise both of his eyebrows in an expression mimicking something that was maybe supposed to be sexual.
Pulling his hand away from hers, he stuck it on her back and pushed her forward a little.
“What was that for?”
“It was to get you to walk faster. You’re taking forever.”
Unsurprisingly, since it hadn’t really been as long as it felt, the inside of the bar was exactly the same as it had always been when she’d worked there.
While not as chaotic as when Darren got involved with things, there were still chairs strewn about. She spotted one overturned table in a corner of the room, several men around it. It didn’t look like the table had fallen due to a fight, though. One man sat casually with his legs up on another chair that had been put on his side, and the other three were continuing with business as usual. Beers were being chugged back. There was a faint smoky fog drifting through the air, one of an overdone bacon smoker and not of a cigarette; a half-eaten plate left at the bar told Victoria that some poor soul had gone ahead and ordered food from the bar without thinking about just what that could mean for the state of their insides.
Her eyes ventured to behind the bar, trying to think about what could’ve happened there since she left. There was one girl she’d seen a few times when she was leaving work after a shorter shift, but that girl wasn’t there, and Victoria wasn't expecting that woman to have been her replacement anyway. It didn’t look like there was actually a replacement for her at all. Nope – instead, she saw the sight of her old boss standing there behind the bar.
Marcus.
She’d only seen him a handful of times since he’d hired her. He hadn’t noticed her yet, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t see her eventually. While the bar was somewhat crowded, there were still gaps in the room as people made to move around. Her eyes followed the hazy tell-tale motions of some of the drunks. It wasn’t that late, but already people were gathering in here. She made a point to notice that while some of Darren’s friends were in here, very few of his club were. She suspected that had to do with the rescue mission they’d just gone and dealt with – her rescue mission.
“Darren,” she hissed.
He looked to her with a grin on his face. “What, babe?”
She didn’t bother with correcting him on the use of that particular affection. Besides, it wasn’t like that bothered her. If anything, she liked it.
She nodded over to where her boss stood behind the bar. While she wasn’t even that worried about him saying something to her – he probably would, but it wasn’t like she would care if he did – she wasn’t in the mood to be dealing with something like that right now. She was coming down from her fear and anxiety and settling into something that could vaguely represent comfort, if she went ahead and framed it a certain way.
Darren looked to what she was staring at. He probably didn’t get what was going on, since she hadn’t exactly told him – but he looked at her again. And then he looked back to Marcus, and he connected the dots in his head. He was great at reading people, and it just brought out his smirk even more when he knew he was right. He was always right.
“So,” he wrapped an arm around her shoulder and squeezed. He was completely sober and he was already getting touchy-feely. “How did you quit?”
“You kidnapped me.”
He laughed. “Oh. That.”
Then he looked around the room again. She did the same. She wasn’t sure what they were supposed to be looking for, but there was nothing in this room that she thought was particularly great to look at. The bar was totally different to her now, though. Although it looked the same as it had when she first walked in, there was something about the air of it that was different.
Darren hadn’t been the only one to go looking for her when she meant missing. And sure, maybe he had told them that they had to go looking for her, but they could’ve just as easily said no as they had said yes. They didn’t need to go save her. And that meant that the people who frequented this bar cared enough about her to go rescue her; it would bother them if she died, even though she was just the ex-bartender who had served here for a few months. And she had been so terribly bitchy to all of them, viewing them as lesser than her just because they were bikers. A hot blush of shame went through her body, and she made her way to a table with Darren trailing alongside her.
She was getting ready to go ahead and take a seat there when Darren elbowed her. He wanted to move somewhere else.
“You're really indecisive today,” she said, rubbing her arm and feigning a wince. “And touchy.”'
“I have reasons to be touchy.” His voice lowered.
What was he even trying to get at? It wasn’t like this was going to get any worse. They’d already made a point by rescuing her and doing God knows what else. Sure, they didn’t know if anyone was in legal trouble – which was bad – and they didn’t know if any of his friends had been hurt, which was even worse. But there was nothing they could do about it right now. If they went and tried to go poking at it, things would probably get worse, and they might even have to deal with law enforcement. Victoria wasn’t even sure how to go about thinking about that, because every time her mind wandered there the endings just got worse and worse:
Being an accomplice in murder. Having to explain to police officers in an interrogation room just how she’d gotten involved with Darren, and having them see on her face that she’d been having sex with him. Life in prison.
Getting locked in solitary confinement.
Getting sentenced to death. She wasn’t sure if their state still allowed that, but it was a very real possibility. And even if it took years for her to be put to death (or even if she never was), that would still be terrifying and horrible to go through.
She shivered.
Pushing those thoughts away, she descended from them and went back to the room. Everything was the same as it had been a few seconds ago, and Darren was still looking at her. Like he was expecting an answer. Like he was waiting for her to move.
She didn’t want to follow him. She started to lead the way, but he caught her arm with his hand again and they started drifting in the direction he wanted them to go. To her horror, she realized that they were going to a table dangerously close to the bar.
It was set up so it was almost against the wood on the far end. They were on the opposite side of where the storage room ran, so if Marcus went from there he probably wouldn’t notice them. They were right next to the shelf of liquors hanging from one end of the bar, though, so if anyone asked for a drink of that, she was done for.
She didn’t recognize anyone at the table. Well, she did, but not by names. There was the one guy who was always loud, except for when he was drunk, at which point he would become weirdly hushed; there was the guy who was always dancing around, and there was... No. Those were the only two she recognized, and she had no idea what to call either of them. In total, there were five people at the table. Those two, Darren, herself, and someone else.
Darren gestured to Dancing Guy. “Benny.”
He nodded to the other two in turn, grunting out names: Jack and Bean, which had to have been some kind of weird pun about that folk tale. Then he returned to what was more important.
His gaze moved to Dancing Guy, and Victoria sat between Darren and Jack as they mumbled out some words. Their heads were so close together that she wouldn’t have been able to hear them, even if there wasn’t the din of noise circulating through the bar.
Dancing Guy – Benny – turned to look at something across the bar, and that was when Victoria noticed the fresh, ragged cut on his left cheek. It had been hastily stitched together, and Victoria felt a pang of guilt as she realized that he was probably one of the many that had worked together to go save her.
Not that she had needed to be saved.
But still.
Darren’s head turned back to Benny for a second, after making eye contact with Victoria. “Tell them.”
Jack and Bean both turned their heads to look at Darren and Benny. They’d been bent with their foreheads to their beers, but now they were entirely focused.