by Sarra Cannon
I hated the arguing. I wanted to sneak out and tell Ella Mae to take me home, but who knew what kind of hell would break loose if I bailed.
The room broke out in multiple conversations again, everyone shouting their own opinions. I wondered what my mother would do in a situation like this. Had she ever been in charge of this group? Would they even tell me if I asked?
Mrs. Ashworth picked up her glass and clanged a spoon against its edge. Slowly, the room settled into silence. She smiled and set the glass down. “In light of this new information, perhaps we should have another discussion about her confirmation.”
I swallowed nervously. Confirmation? I hoped that wasn’t what they called the ceremony where they put a demon inside of me.
The members of the council whispered in small groups. My outburst hadn’t taught them anything. They were still keeping their secrets and shutting me out. Part of me wanted to know the truth about all of it, and part of me wanted to run as far away from this town as I could and never look back.
“I think it’s a good solution,” Sheriff Hollingsworth said. “Some of the members have brought up trust issues. I think that if Harper is willing to go through the confirmation, it will be a big step forward for her and for all of us.”
I backed toward Mrs. King and sat down again in the high-backed chair.
“What’s the confirmation?” I asked in a whisper.
She leaned toward me. “A ritual where you accept your role in the Order. Your tattoo was the first step toward becoming the Prima. The confirmation is the second step.”
Out of how many? I bit my bottom lip.
“Will it hurt?”
“No,” she said, putting her hand on my arm again and giving it a squeeze. “It should actually feel really good.”
I looked at her to make sure she was telling the truth. Her expression looked genuine and sympathetic at the same time.
“Plus,” she said with a sly smile, “it will make you more powerful.”
The council voted unanimously to perform my confirmation ceremony right then and there. All that was left was for me to accept. I had a feeling that if they hadn’t needed my acceptance, they would have already drugged me and gone ahead with this ritual a long time ago.
“Harper?” Mrs. Ashworth said. “Are you willing to take the next step toward becoming the Prima?”
“I thought I already was the Prima,” I said, confused.
She smiled. “You are Prima Futura, future Prima. There’s still so much you’ll need to learn before you take on the role of Prima.”
My heart was beating so fast, I could feel it at the base of my tongue. My entire mouth went dry. If I said no, what would they do to me? But if I said yes, would I be taking one step too far down this road toward becoming a member of the Order? How far could I go before it was too late to ever turn back?
More power did sound nice, though. I thought back to the hospital and touched my fingers to my mother’s necklace. If it hadn’t been for the demon who came to my rescue, I might not have been able to defeat the Others.
“Yes,” I said, closing my fist around the pendant. “I’m ready.”
Prima Futura
The ritual was performed right there in the living room of the Ashworth mansion. No ritual room required. Unfortunately, it did involve a ritual knife, and quite frankly, I’d had my fill of those stupid things.
A silver robe was placed around my shoulders while the others in the room changed into the black and blue robes I’d seen the night of Brooke’s initiation. I noticed more than a few women in the room with tears in their eyes. For them, this was a sacred ceremony. A dedication and commitment to the power of the Order.
For me, it was a survival tactic.
The lights dimmed and five candles were lit. Mrs. Ashworth stepped forward in her blue robe and placed her hand on my forehead.
“Harper Madison Brighton.” Her voice was clear and commanding. It was the first time anyone had ever called me by my true family name, and my skin broke out in goosebumps. “We lift you up as Prima Futura.”
Outside, a wind chime jingled. I felt a breath of cold air rush into me and fill my chest. My skin tingled as if it were made of glitter, and I closed my eyes.
“Prima Futura, do you confirm your devotion to the Order of Shadows?”
“Yes,” I said, my voice barely more than the lightest of whispers.
“Prima Futura, do you confirm your loyalty?”
“I do,” I said, my voice almost feeling as if it weren’t my own anymore. Mrs. Ashworth lifted her palm into the air and my body rose slightly from the ground. The long silver robe dangled down to the floor below me.
The room began to chant in unison. “We proclaim you our Prima Futura. May the shadows enter you and fill you with their power.”
Every muscle in my body tensed as I looked around the room. Each woman’s shadow flickered behind her in the candlelight. The shadows took different shapes. A blooming rose. A tiger. A butterfly. A cat. Unique to the woman whose body contained the demon. Mrs. Ashworth rotated her palm slightly and my body fell backwards. I struggled against it, but I had no control.
Fear gripped my being. I should never have agreed to this! My hands shook by my side as I came to rest horizontal to the floor, suspended several feet in the air. Above me, the shadows flickered across the ceiling. The women in the room began to chant.
“Prima Futura, convenire partis potestatis.”
The tattoo on my back burned. Shadows swirled all around my body, faster and faster. I was terrified my mouth would open and the demons would rush inside and take over. I clamped my mouth shut as tight as I could, but I couldn’t close my eyes. I had to see what they were going to do to me.
“Introitus com studium.”
The shadows gathered together near the ceiling. They became one large swirling mass above my chest. At Mrs. Ashworth’s command, they swooped down on top of me, passing through my body like ghosts. I felt the shocking power of their energy down to the core of my soul. It was invigorating and terrifying at the same time. My body buzzed with their power and a warmth enveloped me, taking away the cold breath locked in my chest.
I was lowered to the ground, my back against the floor. All around me, the members of the council kneeled and bowed their heads, as if I were their queen. I pushed myself up and tried to stand. I felt like a new fawn, using her legs for the first time. My body felt foreign to me. Alien.
With relief, I saw each demon still flickering in the shadows behind their master. They had not entered me forever, but I felt a piece of their power inside of me. I was tied to them all now, and I knew that nothing would ever change that.
My confirmation was complete, and I was another step closer becoming one of them.
This Isn’t Going To Make Me Love You
I left the house feeling high. My energy was ramped up beyond normal. There was this one time in Atlanta when I drank three mochas in one afternoon. Walking out into the mist, I felt like that, only multiplied by ten. This was going to take some getting used to.
The outside lights were bright, illuminating all the fancy cars in the driveway. But there was no sign of the Shadowford van. I grumbled and looked both ways down the residential street. Had she seriously left me here? Was I supposed to call her? Or try to bum a ride back home?
With all this energy, I thought I could probably have walked home in record time.
“Need a ride?” Drake Ashworth stepped out of the shadows beside the garage, a silver box in his hand.
It suddenly felt like this night would never end.
“I don’t know,” I said. I glanced all around again, begging for the big white Shadowford van to magically come into view. “Did you see Ella Mae drive off? I thought she was waiting for me.”
“She was,” he said. He stepped closer. “I told her I’d make sure you got home safe and sound.”
I rolled my eyes and sucked in a frustrated breath. So he already knew I needed a ride. Why did h
e even ask me in the first place?
“You didn’t have to do that,” I said.
“I wanted to spend some time with you,” he said. “It’s been tough to get a moment alone with you lately.”
The last time Drake and I were alone was when he came to visit me in the hospital. He’d brought red roses. It was a sweet gesture, but by that point, I was already so done with him, no gift could salvage our relationship. After I told him how I felt, he stuffed the roses in the garbage and slammed the door. He also told me he never wanted to see me again. Guess he’d changed his mind.
“I’m kind of anxious to get home,” I said, thinking about how Jackson and I had planned to meet up over an hour ago. “It’s been a rough night.”
He closed the space between us with one long stride. I wanted to step backwards, but it would have put me on the wet grass.
“God, you look amazing,” he said. His eyes were glued to my face. “It’s crazy. You look even more beautiful than ever.”
He studied me like he was trying to memorize my face. It made me supremely uncomfortable. All I could think about was Jackson standing in the barn, wondering why the hell I’d ditched him. Instead, I was stuck here with the one guy in Peachville I couldn’t stand.
“So can we go?”
“I wanted to give you this,” he said. He shoved the box toward me. It was small and the silver glittered in the bright lights.
“Thanks,” I said. I stuffed the box in the pocket of my jeans.
Drake frowned. “Aren’t you even going to open it?”
I wiped some of the light rain from my face. It was only lightly misting, but if we stood out there much longer, we’d be soaked.
I sighed and pulled the box from my pocket. I didn’t want a present from him at all. Besides, no matter what was inside that box, it wasn’t like I was going to suddenly change my mind and start going out with him again. Did he really believe that some trinket could change the way I felt?
I slipped the white ribbon from the box and opened it. Inside, nestled on a bed of white fluff, were two perfect diamond earrings. I gasped. “Jesus, Drake,” I said. “This had to cost you a fortune.”
He smiled. “You’re worth it.”
I picked up one of the earrings and studied it in the light. It was truly gorgeous. And it was probably more expensive than everything I’d ever owned combined. Still, it didn’t change anything. I set the earring back down in the fluff and closed the box.
“I can’t accept these,” I said, holding the box out to him.
“Take it,” he said. “I bought them for you.”
I wanted to set the box down on the driveway and walk away, but that seemed childish. “This isn’t going to make me love you,” I said softly.
“I know,” he said, his shoulders sagging. “But maybe it will make you think about taking me back?” He said it as a question.
“Can you take me home please?”
“Harper-“
“Drake, please,” I said. “It’s been a really long day. The last thing I want to do is stand out here in the rain.”
He opened his mouth to speak, then must have seen the exasperated look on my face. He pulled his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the doors to his Camaro. “Alright,” he said. “I’ll take you home.”
I got into the car, and he backed onto the quiet street. The silver box sat in my lap. What the heck was I going to do with diamond earrings? I couldn’t wear them, because that would only give Drake reason to hope that I still cared about him in that way. Selling them seemed kind of mean. And it didn’t seem right to just let them gather dust in my jewelry box.
“What were you doing at Mom’s meeting, anyway?” he asked.
The rain was coming down harder and inside the car it was dark and cold.
“They wanted to talk to me about the game Friday night,” I lied. “Something about being an ambassador for the team.”
He made a face and glanced toward me. I wasn’t sure he was buying my story, but he didn’t ask anything else about it. We sat in silence for a minute, then he asked how I was feeling since I’d gotten home from the hospital.
“Much better,” I said. “My shoulder still hurts sometimes, but it’s getting better.”
More silence. The whole ride was awkward and tense.
When we pulled down the driveway to Shadowford, he cleared his throat. “There’s this mixer after the game Friday,” he said. “At Lark’s family’s lake house. You heard about it?”
Everyone knew about the mixer. “Yeah.”
“Will you go with me?” he said. “It doesn’t have to be an official date or anything.”
I looked out the window and wondered when this guy was going to get a clue. I didn’t even know if I would be allowed to go to the party with this new curfew, but I certainly wasn’t going with him. “I don’t think so, Drake. And listen.” I set the silver box on the dashboard. “I really can’t accept these. Thanks for the thought and all, but it’s over. I still want to be your friend, but that’s it, okay?”
His eyes wandered over to the box, then down to his hands. “See you tomorrow at school?”
“Sure,” I said. I got out of the car and ran up to the front porch, not even looking back as he drove away. I had a sinking feeling it wasn’t anywhere close to over with Drake Ashworth.
I Only Had To Think It
Once Drake pulled away, I ran back down the front steps and made my way around to the back of the house. I knew there was a slim chance Jackson was still in the barn an hour later, but it was worth a shot. I’d been dying to talk to him all day. Plus, I wanted to see what he knew about the confirmation ritual I’d just gone through. How close did that put me to being Prima? I knew the council couldn’t be trusted to tell me the truth.
The barn door was stuck tight. I yanked it as hard as I could and finally slipped inside. The darkness inside consumed my vision. I couldn’t so much as see the hand in front of my face. Rain water trickled down my back, and I shivered.
“Jackson?”
No response.
I lifted my palm and summoned an orb of dim light. Usually, the orb of light took a decent amount of energy, but tonight, I only had to think it and the orb appeared. It happened so fast, it hardly took any effort at all. I laughed. If this is what it felt like to be one step closer to Prima, I wondered what it would feel like to actually combine with Peachville’s demon. I shook the thought from my head. I would never allow that to happen. No matter how much fun that kind of power might be, it wasn’t worth it.
I held the orb up and looked around. Disappointed, I was just about to turn and walk out when a piece of paper caught my eye. It was stuck to the wall near the door. Jackson’s scratchy handwriting brought a smile to my face.
“Missed you,” the note read. “Meet me in the parking lot tomorrow after practice. I have a surprise for you.”
I held my hand to my heart. My whole body smiled. Jackson had a surprise for me.
Myself, But Better
Today was my first day back at school, and I woke up excited to get back into my routine. It had been almost an entire week since I’d seen most of my friends. Unfortunately, I was also way behind on my assignments. I hoped the teachers would go easy on me.
I showered and stood wet in front of the mirror. With the corner of my towel, I wiped away the steamed part of the mirror and studied my reflection. The scar on my left shoulder was pink and tender. It was healing slower than I thought it would. There would probably always be a mark where the ritual dagger sunk into my skin, but it was a small price to pay for Jackson’s life. And my own.
I leaned in close to the mirror and paused. Was my face clearer today? I could have sworn I had a pimple on my jawline yesterday, but today it was completely clear and smooth. I ran my hand across my skin and thought it felt awfully soft. I shrugged and wrapped the towel close around my body.
The closet was where I spent the next twenty minutes. I had absolutely nothing cute to wear for a
n afternoon with Jackson. All I had were my typical jeans and tank tops or t-shirts. I shuffled through the hangers. One black skirt with lace which I thought was super cute, but Brooke didn’t like. She’d told me it was too “emo” and didn’t “fit in” with the cheerleading squad’s idea of good fashion. I had the dress I’d worn to homecoming, which was definitely not school-appropriate.
It was too bad I couldn’t keep a glamour going for hours. I could have any wardrobe I wanted if I could create it from my mind every morning. I wouldn’t even have to spend a dime to look like a celebrity in the latest fashions.
I glanced at the magazine on my bedside table. What if I did have the energy to create my own look for an entire day?
The orb last night had been extremely easy to conjure. I bet it took only a tenth of the energy it normally took. Maybe a glamour would be the same way. Of course, running out of juice in the middle of class and reverting suddenly back to jeans and a t-shirt would be a little embarrassing, but it was almost worth the risk just to look good for Jackson after school. If I had to be home by seven, I wanted to make the most of it.
I opened the magazine and flipped through the pages. I needed to find something cute but not too expensive. Showing up in Gucci boots would be hard to explain. Sure, Lark and Brooke were from families that could afford those kinds of things. A girl with no parents and no job, however, might have a tough time explaining herself.
The perfect outfit jumped out at me as I turned to a page near the middle. My stomach fluttered. Could I really pull this off?
Skinny jeans. A black tunic top that fell slightly off the shoulder. Black boots that came up over the jeans at the bottom. And just for a touch of style – a pair of giant gold hoops. Not too expensive or flamboyant, but definitely sexy and definitely my style.
I quickly dressed in my basic jeans and a long sleeve black t-shirt with my scuffed black boots. Then, I sat down on the floor of my room and placed my hands palm up on my knees. I closed my eyes and invited the energy into my body. Immediately, I could feel the flow of power begin to course through me like a river. It was strong and pulsing. I tapped into that power, like drinking from a fountain.