"There are free tools out there that you can use to schedule posts and tweets," Luc told him, once Adam's head was suitably swimming. "But they can't help you reply to people who are interested or have questions."
"And this stuff really works?" Adam asked.
"It can, if you're consistent and you post content that encourages people to engage with you." Luc caught his bottom lip between his teeth and chewed on it for a couple of seconds. "I'll be here for another week or so. I'll help you until I leave. I’ll make sure you're comfortable making posts and setting up a scheduler."
"Thanks."
"We're done for today then," Luc said, shutting the laptop lid. "You can escape." There was a bitterness to his voice that made Adam shiver.
Adam gritted his teeth. Escaping was exactly what he wanted to do, but at the same time he hated that his reaction to Luc's admission was causing his brother pain.
"I don't want things to be difficult between us," he said, after he had carefully formulated the sentence in his head.
"Nor do I," Luc admitted. "But I don't know how to make things right, Adam. I can't take back what I said or how I feel, and you can't change how disgusted you are by me."
"I'm not..." Adam bit his tongue.
The problem was that part of him was disgusted by Luc's attraction to him and he had made that really clear. And then then there was the other part of him—the one he wanted to bury deep down—that kept putting unwanted thoughts into his head. Like the way the sunlight pouring in through the window highlighted Luc's face, illuminating his long straight nose and his high cheekbones.
"We need to at least try to get past this, for Mum and Dad."
Luc drummed his fingertips against the laptop lid. "I offered to move out."
"That won't help." Well, it would, but there was no way they would be able to explain Luc's departure to their parents.
"At least we wouldn't be in each other's faces all the time."
"You'll be gone in a couple of weeks," Adam reminded him. "We need to try to forget about our... problem... until then."
Luc huffed out a breath. "Problem?"
Adam threw his hands up in frustration. "I'm trying, Luc. This is really hard for me."
"And you think it isn't hard for me? That wanting to be with you hasn't made my life hell since I was fourteen years old?" Luc spat the words out, obviously trying to keep quiet despite the anger oozing from his voice. He closed his eyes, pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a slow breath.
Adam watched as a little of the tension slipped out of his brother's shoulders, making them drop a fraction. He found his gaze snagging on Luc's T-shirt, where the fabric met his long neck. Another detail he shouldn't be noticing. Nor should his mind have wondered, even for a fraction of a second, to what it would be like to kiss his brother's throat. He still couldn't understand why Luc's admission had sparked such thoughts which now ran riot in his head. He knew he had to find a way to get rid of them; they were driving him crazy.
"What are we going to do?" Luc asked miserably.
"I don't know," Adam admitted. "Pretend everything's okay? It would only be for another week."
"Yeah," Luc said. "I can do that. I've been pretending for a long time." He opened his eyes and stared directly into Adam's eyes. "The question is, can you? Because you're the one who's been freaking out the past few days."
Adam ran his hand through his hair. "Yeah, I know." He couldn't drag his gaze away from Luc's. Fuck, his brother had beautiful eyes: dark and intense. "I'm trying really hard not to." Not to what? Freak out? Or find a new detail about Luc to obsess over? He got up and stood behind his chair, gripping the seat back with his hands. "I might go and see Mason for a few days. Would that help?" It would definitely help him.
"Mason?" Luc's eyes grew wider, which only made them more attractive. "I didn't know you guys were still in touch with each other."
"He's one of my closest friends."
"And your ex," Luc said. "I don't have a good enough relationship with any of my exes to want to go and spend time with them."
"Mason's different." Adam couldn't imagine ever hating Mason enough to not want to keep in touch. Luc must have had some really messy breakups.
"Do you... still have feelings for him?" Luc asked.
Adam stiffened. He wanted to snap out a response. How he did or didn't feel about Mason was none of Luc's business. He knew why Luc was curious: he was wondering if Mason was an obstacle to Adam's affection. Never mind the fact they were stepbrothers provided a fucking massive hurdle that was too big for either of them to jump.
He folded his arms. "No. We're just friends."
Luc flopped back a little in his chair. "Won't Mum and Dad miss you at the dance school?"
"The schools are on half term next week," Adam told him. "There are always tons of kids missing, so we tend not to run normal lessons. Some of the extra exam coaching sessions carry on, but Mum and Dad can handle those without me."
Luc nodded thoughtfully. "It might be a good idea then," he said, although he didn't look or sound convinced. "What's Mason doing these days?"
"Dancing," Adam said, feeling himself becoming even more rigid. "He got accepted into a touring company."
Which Luc would have known, if hadn't estranged himself. Luc would have known exactly when and why Adam and Mason had broken up.
"Jealous?" Luc asked.
Adam clenched his teeth. "No. I keep telling you, I'm happy being a teacher."
Luc scrunched up his lips but remained silent, although his chin did dip a little.
Adam was officially done with the conversation. He was done with being judged by Luc, who had no right at all to do so. So what if he hadn't followed his dream? He'd stayed to help their parents. Teaching was a valuable career and it wasn't like he'd stopped dancing.
"I'll get in touch with Mason," he muttered, backing away towards the door. "See if I can go stay with him for a bit." He'd have to sleep on a hotel floor somewhere, but he could handle that. It was better than being around Luc.
"You do that," Luc said, clipping his words. He opened his laptop back up, turned away from Adam and hunched his shoulders.
Adam sighed. He really did hate the animosity between them, but it was obvious to him that it wasn't going to ebb any time soon.
Chapter Eleven
Luc
As he sat in the kitchen, Luc could hear music resonating from within the cellar. It thrummed against his bare feet. He longed to sneak downstairs to watch Adam dance. It had been years since he had. He had beautiful memories of Adam's dancing that he cherished.
"Morning," Ken said as he wandered into the kitchen. "Is that Adam downstairs?"
Luc nodded. "Who else?"
He watched as Ken started to make himself a sandwich for lunch. Luc's mum was out with some of her friends.
"Actually, Dad, I was wondering if I could talk to you."
Ken raised his eyebrows as he sat down and took a bite of his sandwich. "Shoot," he said around the mouthful of food.
"Adam put a lot of work into those lesson ideas—"
"I know."
"You are thinking about it seriously, aren't you?"
Ken nodded.
"I know you're not keen on the idea but opening the school up to toddlers will bring in money that you desperately need."
Ken scowled, dropping his sandwich onto the plate, allowing a dollop of mayonnaise to escape. "I'm well aware of how dire the money situation is, Luc."
Luc bit his tongue. He was also aware of how stubborn his dad could be and how he'd dig his heels in if he felt pressured.
"Have you considered offering a free trial lesson to anyone interested in joining the school?" he asked, jumping to another idea he knew Ken hadn't been a fan of.
"Your mum thinks we should," Ken said, retrieving his sandwich. "So that's what we'll do."
Luc smiled. "Great. I'll get the flyers finalised and printed. Once we've got them, I'll do some leafleting runs."
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"I'm sure Adam will help."
Luc doubted that very much, but he nodded anyway. He stood. "I'd better go check your social media accounts. See if we've had any enquiries." He hoped they had, but it was still really early days. "When you see parents tonight, could you ask them all to like your Facebook page and share it with their friends?"
"Of course."
That would help.
"Shouldn't Adam be helping you?" Ken asked, as Luc headed towards the door.
"I don't want to disturb him. He can help later."
"He won't mind."
Luc didn't argue. He and Adam were supposed to be acting like nothing was wrong. Tiptoeing around Adam was doing the exact opposite.
He walked down the stairs to the cellar, careful not to make too much noise. He wanted to catch a glimpse of Adam dancing before his stepbrother realised he was there. The music was loud enough to vibrate through his body. It was a stirring classical piece, which made Luc's body vibrate with appreciation, even though he had no idea what it was called or who composed it. Adam was dancing around the small studio space, fluidly moving through steps and leaps. Once, Luc might have been able to name one or two of the ballet moves, but all the French words had fled from his memory; he hadn't danced since he was ten, which felt like a lifetime ago. Not that it stopped him appreciating the beauty of the steps, or how breathtaking Adam was.
Luc sat on the bottom step, not hiding, but not announcing his presence either. Adam turned towards him and caught his gaze but didn't stop or falter. Smiling, Luc leaned forward on his knees, glad that Adam felt comfortable enough to carry on dancing in front of him. Adam was wearing jogging pants and a loose-fitting T-shirt. Both garments obscured the strong curves of his body, but Luc could still see Adam's face. His expression was serene; his muscles were completely relaxed, smoothing his features. Sweat made his skin glisten under the glow of the bare lightbulb in the centre of the ceiling. Damn, he was gorgeous.
Luc clasped his hands together to stop himself from fidgeting. His knee still managed to jog up and down much faster than the music’s beat. He wanted to stride over to Adam, grab him, push him up against the wall and kiss him. He wanted to run his hands all over his brother's sweaty body, breathe in his musky scent and taste the salt on his skin. Luc had no idea what it would take to drive Adam out of his head. Living elsewhere for four years hadn't worked.
The piece of music finished, prompting Adam to stop.
Luc clapped his hands. "That was amazing." He couldn't help but grin as he spoke.
"I was just messing around." Adam grabbed a hand towel that was draped over one of the barres.
Luc licked his lips as Adam mopped the sweat from his face and hair. "I was going to check the social media accounts, if you want to help me?"
"I need to take a shower."
Luc would have given anything to be able to join his stepbrother in the shower. "Sure. I can wait for you."
Adam held the towel against his chest, tilting his head to the side. "Do you miss it?"
"What?"
"Dancing?"
Luc shook his head. "I never enjoyed it as much as you did. I only took lessons because Mum and Dad wanted me to."
"So you wouldn't have carried on, even if we hadn't been bullied about it?"
Luc shrugged. "Honestly? I don't know. I might have." He glanced upwards. "It was important to them."
"Sometimes I wish I'd been able to see them dance on the stage," Adam said quietly. "I've seen all the programmes and photographs from their performances, but it's not the same."
Luc's eyes widened. If he'd been in a cartoon, a thought bubble with a lit lightbulb would have appeared above his head. "We should use some of those photos," he said, suddenly excited. "Mum was a prima ballerina. We need to use that in our marketing." He stood. "Did you get in touch with Mason?"
Adam nodded. "I'm going down to see him on Monday for a couple of days."
"Do you think you could get some photos of him dancing?"
"Maybe. Why?"
"Because we should use him too, as a success story of the dance school." He rolled his eyes. "I seem to remember he was pretty photogenic." It annoyed him to admit that, especially in front of Adam. Especially when Adam was about to run off to go and spend time with him.
"I'd have to ask him," Adam said, his expression doubtful.
"You don't think he'd be up for being our poster boy?"
Adam shrugged. "Hard to say. He's moved on, Luc." He stared into Luc's eyes as he spoke.
A shiver ran down Luc's spine. He had no idea what was happening, but neither of them was looking away. Surely there was only one reason Adam would make it so clear that his relationship with Mason was over. His breath caught in his throat. And if Adam was telling him that he was available… Did Adam have feelings for him?
"I should go and take a shower," Adam said nonchalantly. "I'll see you upstairs in about twenty minutes? To look at the social media accounts," he added gruffly, as he finally dipped his gaze.
Luc nodded, unable to speak. He was sure of it now. Adam might have been denying it to himself, but there was something stirring within him. There had to be. Luc needed there to be. He watched as Adam hung the towel back over the barre and wandered past him to the stairs. Once his stepbrother was gone, Luc retrieved the towel and held it to his face, inhaling Adam's scent. It wasn't the same as kissing or licking the sweat off Adam's body, but for the time being, it was close enough.
***
Luc couldn't concentrate as he sat next to Adam, watching as his stepbrother added new posts and tweets and responded to the single enquiry they'd received, which asked for clarification on the exam board they followed. Adam smelt of citrus and cedar wood. His freshly washed skin was still a little pink, suggesting he'd taken a hot shower. As he focused on the wording of a tweet, his forehead wrinkled adorably. It would have been so easy for Luc to lean across and kiss his jawline. He resisted, but that didn't mean he was about to stop staring.
"That's distracting," Adam muttered.
"What?" Luc tried to make his voice as innocent as possible; he was pretty sure he'd failed.
"You know what." He gestured towards the screen. "How's that."
Luc shifted his gaze for long enough to read the tweet. "Looks great. You might want to get a bit faster at writing them though. Ten minutes to craft two-hundred and eighty characters must be a record."
Adam scowled, which was not the reaction Luc had hoped to get from him.
"It was a joke."
"A bad one." Adam lowered his chin. "I know I'm not as good at this shit as you, but I'm doing my best."
Luc reached out and touched Adam's shoulder before his brain could engage and tell his hand not to. But seeing as he'd done it, he chose not to move his hand away. "I know that. I'm sorry, I was just poking fun."
Adam jerked away from his touch and shifted his chair an inch to the left. "I told you not to touch me," he hissed.
Luc dropped his hand into his lap. "Trust me, you'd know if I was trying to touch you in that way."
If he stepped over that line again, there would be no doubt in either of their minds. He would make it absolutely clear what he wanted from Adam.
Adam put the tweet live and then switched tab to the Facebook account. "More words to write," he muttered. "Great. You actually enjoy doing this for a living?"
Luc chuckled. "There's a lot more to marketing than running social media accounts, but yes, I do enjoy it."
They lapsed into silence again as Adam typed, then deleted, then finally wrote a post.
"Too long," Luc said, when Adam had finished his fifth attempt. "Just because you have more space, it doesn't mean you need to use it."
"Why don't I just copy and paste the tweet, then?" Adam growled. "Or link the accounts. You can do that, right? Whatever I post on Facebook goes out as a tweet and vice versa?"
"Just because you can, it doesn't mean you should."
"Stop trying to sound clever.
Everyone knows that saying."
"You know you're cute when you get annoyed," Luc said.
It was another instance of not engaging his brain fast enough. When Adam scowled, it spurred him to carry on. He'd already pissed his stepbrother off, what harm would it do to prod a little further?
"You get this adorable V shaped wrinkle right here." He pointed to the bridge of Adam's nose, his finger only a millimetre or two from actually touching Adam's skin.
Adam glared at him but didn't flinch away. "You're an ass."
Luc snatched his hand back in response to a knock at the door.
A second later, their dad opened it and peered into the room. "How's it going?"
"Great," Adam said, staring at the laptop screen again.
"Yeah," Luc agreed. "Great."
Ken paused for a second, his gaze flicked between his two sons. "Good. Your mum called, she wants me to pick her up. We'll be back soon, okay?"
"Okay."
He left, shutting the door behind him. Neither Luc nor Adam moved as Ken's footsteps faded away down the stairs. There was a pause for a minute or two and then the front door slammed shut with a rattle that reverberated through the house, reaching them on the top floor.
"That's a good post," Luc said. "Find a photo we haven't used yet and you're good to go."
Adam didn't make any attempt to attach a photo to the post. He sat with his shoulders hunched and his jaw clenched, staring at the screen.
"I'm sorry for being a jerk," Luc said. "Sometimes I don't know when to stop."
"Apparently not."
Luc leaned forward so he could put his fingers on the track pad. "Do you want me to find a photo?"
Adam pushed his arm away roughly. "No. I want..." He balled his hands into fists in his lap. "I want..."
"What?" Luc asked. "What do you want?" He held his breath, not daring to let his thoughts wander the way they wanted to.
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