“Conrad may have some information. His uncle from Fish Creek has played Santa in the past.”
Lila pulled in a slow breath. If he was about to propose to Suzanne, she’d better keep her distance. He deserved every right to happiness. She was beginning to regret agreeing to sing in the Christmas choir. He’d reminded Lila that his mother had promised he’d give her a ride to practice, and she’d agreed without thinking it through. That was going to complicate matters.
“Or you could go to the chamber meeting in my place,” Melanie interrupted Lila’s thoughts. “It’s held the first Wednesday of every month at Town Hall.”
“That sounds better. That would be next Wednesday, right?”
“Yes. The director’s name is Anne Richards. Introduce yourself and explain you’re filling in for me. The Santa issue may already be on the agenda. If not, are you comfortable bringing it up?”
“Sure, that sounds easy enough.”
“How’s everything else going?”
“Are you asking about my writing and the fifty pages I need to have done?”
“Yes, that and…”
“Oh, you mean Conrad? I’m trying to keep my distance from him.”
“I gathered that much. The question is why.”
Lila glanced at the wood-planked floor, searching for the right words. “Because he’s going to ask Suzanne to marry him this Christmas. That’s plenty reason in my mind.”
“Yes, unless something or someone prevents him from doing that. It’s pretty obvious to me that whatever you and Conrad had in the past has reignited. There’s a very special bond between you, and I’m not the only one who noticed the electricity the night of the signing.”
Lila giggled and released the tension building inside of her with the subject of Conrad. “You’re starting to sound like my aunt.”
“And probably for good reason. Promise me you’ll think about this and don’t wait until it’s too late.”
Lila frowned. “Too late for what?”
“To tell him you’ve fallen back in love with him.”
“It isn’t fair to him if I…”
“When are you going to forgive yourself for a decision you made so many years ago?”
The weight of her consequences hit Lila hard as if she wore a backpack full of her own books. “I don’t believe its right to interfere now, Mel.”
“I want you to do something for me. Follow your heart, not your head.”
Did Melanie make a good point? “Did I tell you he’s picking me up tomorrow night for choir practice?”
“What? How did this come about?” Melanie’s surprise matched Lila’s excitement.
Lila visualized the smile on Melanie’s face.
“The night of the book signing, his mother asked me to join the choir and in the next breath she offered Conrad to pick me up on his way. Apparently, he’s in the choir too.”
Melanie let out a whoop. “Now we’re talking. I remember you both used to sing in the choir.”
Lila rubbed her hand across her forehead. “I hope I can still carry a tune.”
Melanie giggled. “It’s like riding a bike, I’m sure you’ll do fine.”
“Maybe you’re right. I’m excited about going. I’ve missed singing and being in church.”
Melanie stifled a yawn. “Sounds good, I think I’ll take my afternoon nap now. Let’s talk later.”
Lila sighed with relief. Talking with Melanie always seemed to put her back on the right track. “Sweet dreams, my friend.”
“And Lila?”
“Yes.”
“Give your heart a break and a little room to breathe. Please?”
Lila’s shoulders relaxed. What could it hurt? “OK.”
17
Lila scanned her room at the mess she’d created. Her bed was littered with skirts, slacks, and sweaters. A few dresses hung on hangers over a doorknob.
“This will do,” she muttered, referring to the dark blue pants and matching sweater she’d purchased from On Deck last month. “You’d think I was going to a special event of some kind, not a church choir practice.” But this was no ordinary night. Conrad was picking her up and that made it anything but regular.
Lila snapped off the lights to her room, closed the door, and went downstairs in search of Aunt Cathy. Her aunt smiled when Lila walked into the kitchen and handed Lila a mug of hot coffee, a ritual they shared in the evening and one Lila enjoyed.
“Well, don’t you look nice? Is that new?” Aunt Cathy stirred a sugar cube in her coffee.
Lila wrapped her hands around the warm mug. “It sure is. It’s from On Deck.” She inhaled the aroma of hazelnut as she brought the mug to her lips.
“Shopping local now, are you?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.
Lila smiled, “I guess I am.”
“Sorry I can’t join you and Conrad at choir practice tonight. Early this afternoon I noticed the aches and pains settling in. No fun getting old.” She swept an arm across her body to accentuate her point.
“Oh, don’t worry about that, it’s the first night of practice. I’ll explain it to Mr. Abbott. It’s important you get well.”
Funny, her aunt didn’t appear unwell, but sometimes those things were hard to read. Lila repeated her aunt’s words in her head—you and Conrad. It almost sounded as if they were a couple again.
“I hope you didn’t feel like you were put on the spot to join the choir. I swear, every year Mabel Hamilton manages to rein in some of the best voices in Sister Bay, and she outdoes herself every time.”
“I thought it was sweet of her to ask and to remember that I used to sing. I can’t tell you how long it’s been since I sang a hymn or went to church, for that matter.”
“It’s ironic the way things work out, don’t you agree?”
Lila furrowed her brow. “What do you mean?”
“You and Conrad in the choir again. It’s like old times.” A Cheshire cat grin flashed across her face.
“I think the situation is more coincidental than ironic.”
“Really?” Aunt Cathy sipped from her mug, appearing unimpressed with Lila’s argument.
“Yes. You told me yourself Mrs. Hamilton is the director’s right hand, and Conrad used to sing in the choir. You’re not going to let your imagination run away with this, are you?”
Cathy pulled out a chair from the table and took a seat. “Why don’t you tell me what you think is going on between you and Conrad? According to some folks, sparks are flying, and tongues are wagging. In a village this size, people take notice of that sort of thing and start yapping about it like they do when they’re watching a new series on television.”
“Oh, for goodness’ sake, I’d forgotten how the smallest of details explode into a story here.”
A heavy dose of guilt wiggled its way up Lila’s throat. She assumed she’d been successful at disguising her attraction for Conrad, but apparently, she hadn’t done so well. She must be more careful from now on. “Conrad and I are friends. We’re simply getting reacquainted. It’s mere coincidence that we were once in the Christmas choir and find ourselves there again.”
“And the meal at Husby’s?”
Lila opened her mouth to speak but thought better of it. Her aunt knew about Husby’s?
Aunt Cathy smiled and waved her hands in surrender. “I want you to be aware of how things appear from another perspective, that’s all. As far as I’m concerned, I love what’s transpired between you two. You’re meant to be together, and the sooner you both admit it, the happier you’ll be.”
“Even though he’s about to walk down the aisle with someone else?”
“There’s a reason why he’s not engaged yet, Lila.”
Lila breathed a sigh of relief when the doorbell chime sang out its melody, interrupting their conversation. That was until she stepped aside to let Conrad enter the room. He brought with him a scent of musk, cheeseburgers, and the outdoors. An attractive elixir for Lila. He wore a pair of new black jeans, a
red Henley shirt, and an insulated winter white jacket and resembled a lumberjack and ski instructor rolled into one. His jacket crinkled as he rubbed his palms together. He flashed Lila a smile that weakened her knees. Goodness what this man did to her insides.
“Ladies, it’s getting cold out there.” His voice was as smooth as a commentator on the local news.
Aunt Cathy’s gaze jumped from Conrad to Lila and back to Conrad again. She walked over to the window and made herself comfortable in her favorite chair. “That’s December in Door County. Before you realize it, Christmas will be upon us.”
The adorable look of a boy on Christmas morning swept across Conrad’s face. “And the reason I’m here. Are you ladies ready? I left the truck running so you’d be warm.”
Aunt Cathy grabbed for a blue afghan and placed it on her lap. “I’m afraid I won’t be going. I’m a little under the weather. You go on ahead with Lila.”
Was it Lila’s imagination or did Conrad conceal a smile? Whatever it was caused her heart to stop dead and a lump the size of Mt. Everest to form in her throat.
“I’m sorry to hear that Mrs. Williams. I hope it’s not the flu. A lot’s going around.”
“Oh, don’t you fuss about me. I’m as tough as they come, but a bit worn out. You two enjoy the evening and don’t let Mr. Abbott ruin the night for you.” She placed the hand-crocheted blanket across her lap.
“We’ll do our best, won’t we, Lila?” The words slipped off his tongue as if her aunt wasn’t it the room, leaving Lila’s mouth as dry as parchment paper. Lila couldn’t tell if he was flirting with her or being kind. She offered him a weak smile and swallowed down her suspicions like a bitter pill. She must be misreading him. Sometimes her creative mind clashed with reality.
“Good night, you two,” Aunt Cathy sang out from her chair.
“Good night,” Lila and Conrad chimed together.
Lila ignored the guilt whispering in her ear for heading out the door with another woman’s almost-fiancé. Was Cathy right when she said he wasn’t engaged yet for a reason? She remembered Melanie’s advice to enjoy the moment. She met her aunt’s gaze before closing the door and found an I-told-you-so smile waiting for her.
All Lila could do was return a smile which told her aunt that Lila knew she wasn’t really ill. Then she joined Conrad, walking by his side toward his truck.
He opened the passenger-side door for her. Lila slid onto the warmed leather seat, appreciative that he left the truck running. The cab was as cozy as sitting in front of a roaring fire.
“Suzanne won’t mind you giving me a lift to choir practice, will she?” She asked once he was settled inside.
Conrad shook his head. “Not really. We don’t keep tabs on each other’s every move. The last place she’d want me to take her is to church.”
“What do you do together? If you don’t mind me asking.”
Conrad shrugged. “We used to bowl, but that’s not really me. I did it—”
“To forget about me?”
“S’pose you’re right about that.”
“Did it work?”
Conrad exhaled. “I ended up dating Suzanne, so I guess it did. You said you came close to having some serious relationships too, didn’t you?”
Lila released a disappointing sigh, “I did, but my aunt claims I picked the wrong men on purpose.”
Conrad chuckled under his breath. “Is that possible?”
“I never thought about it until she brought it to my attention. I’m not sure, but all the relationships ended one way or another.”
“Why?” Conrad asked as he pulled up alongside the curb in front of their childhood church.
Lila shrugged as she opened her door. “I suspect I was comparing them to an impossible standard.” She didn’t expect Conrad to answer, and he didn’t disappoint. Lila walked silently beside him on the sidewalk, buried in her thoughts.
Once inside, Lila stood next to Conrad in the back of the building. Her shoulders and neck relaxed in the familiar peace and quiet of her childhood church. The same life-sized statues of Joseph and Mary stood next to one another, gazing down at the infant Jesus. Six pillar candles cast a liquid gold blanket of light into the front of the sanctuary. It reminded Lila of the story declaring the illumination present over the manger in Bethlehem the night Jesus was born. She leaned in toward Conrad. “Can we sit down for a minute?”
“It appears we’re the first ones here.” He led her to one of the back pews and stepped aside, allowing her to enter first, the same gesture he’d always offered when they had dated.
Lila bowed her head and reflected on the last few years of her life. The time she’d spent in New York fooled her into the notion she didn’t need her faith. Seduced by money, fame, and notoriety, she made the climb to the mountaintop without so much of a backward glance. What a fool she’d been. She’d lost the very essence of what gave life meaning—love.
She raised her eyes to the cross and wiped away the tears that collected in the corners of her eyes before Conrad noticed. She didn’t deserve the forgiveness she prayed for because she’d hurt the one person who trusted her. He’d encouraged and supported her to follow her dreams but believed she’d come back to him.
He rested a warm hand on her knee, giving a reassuring squeeze. She dropped her gaze, wanting to reach out and place her hand over his. Did he understand her struggle, her regrets? A voice inside her told her to beg his forgiveness and tell him the truth—that she’d fallen back in love with him.
In the next blink of her eye, the church entrance lit up like the lights on a Christmas tree. Chatter and hushed laughter from the back of the church chased off the silence, which had been so pervasive a moment ago. In one synchronized movement, Lila and Conrad turned and looked over their shoulders to determine what the commotion was all about.
“Hello, hello, everyone, let’s get started.” Mr. Abbott sang out his greeting as he strolled down the center aisle of the church, his woolen coat draped over his left arm. He was holding sheet music in his hand. At least a dozen choir members followed behind him as if he were the Pied Piper. He stopped with a start at Lila and Conrad’s pew, his eyes fixed on Lila.
“Oh, who do we have here? Lila Clark? And who do I have to thank for your participation tonight? I was expecting Mrs. Williams.”
Lila stood to address her former choir director. “Mrs. Hamilton invited me to join the Christmas choir. She said you could use a few more voices and, unfortunately, my aunt is unwell this evening.”
Mr. Abbott brushed a slender finger across his chin and smiled. “We certainly would not turn down a strong soprano voice such as yours, Ms. Clark. You are welcome to join us.” He turned his gaze to Conrad. “Mr. Hamilton. We can always use more tenors. Come along, you two. There’s no time to spare.”
Conrad shot Lila a devilish grin as they followed the group to the front of the church. She brushed up against his shoulder, closing the space between them. “What are you snickering about?”
“I think he remembers the prank we pulled on him years ago.”
Lila had no idea what he was talking about.
“At one of our last choir practices.”
Lila giggled.
People turned to look at them.
“I don’t remember. What happened?” she asked.
“We loosened his music stand. As soon as he touched it, the whole thing fell down with such a force”—Conrad muffled his laugh behind the back of his hand—“The man jumped at least ten feet into the air.”
Lila bit her bottom lip to avoid drawing attention. The last thing she wanted to do was make a fool of herself in front of the Christmas choir and Mr. Abbott. She couldn’t believe Conrad remembered the prank.
“I wasn’t part of that. You and the other tenors pulled that stunt.”
Conrad winked. “Didn’t I tell you all about it before it happened?”
“Ah…”
“You were an accomplice.” Before she could utter another word in
her defense, he jogged up the riser steps headed toward his section of the choir.
“Ms. Clark?” Mr. Abbott twirled around on the balls of his feet to face her. “If you would join the other sopranos who are ever-so-patiently waiting for you, we can get started this evening.” His patience appeared to be wearing as thin as his hairline.
The heat in Lila’s cheeks signaled her embarrassment. Like a schoolgirl being reprimanded for talking in the halls after the bell rang, she wiped the smile off her face and scrambled to take her place in the choir. If only Melanie could be here. For the first time in forever, she was happy to be right where she was, enjoying the moment.
18
Lila hadn’t sung so much in years. A few minutes past nine o’clock Mr. Abbott thanked everyone for their hard work. “We’ll meet next week, same time and place. Good night, all, and remember to protect those voices. I need each and every one of them.”
Conrad approached. Lila told her fellow sopranos she’d be there next week.
He held her coat open, and she easily slipped inside. They walked out of the church following the others, making conversation, and in step with each other back to his truck. Their coats brushed up against one another, and Lila fought the urge to slip her hand into his.
Conrad cleared his throat. “That wasn’t as bad as I thought. I had fun.”
Lila tilted her head back toward the sky, maneuvering to catch the falling snowflakes in her mouth. “I loved it. It was like old times. It’s been way too long.”
When they reached the truck, he paused watching her. “You still think you’re pretty good at catching snowflakes like that, don’t you?” He opened the passenger-side door open for her.
“As a matter of fact, I do. Is there anything wrong with that?”
He raised his hands as if to surrender, a wide grin spreading across his face. “Not a thing. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen anyone do it.”
She slid into the seat but peered deep into the eyes that captivated her. “Since I’ve been home, I’ve realized there are a lot of things I’ve missed and haven’t done in a long time.” She closed the door before he responded.
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