“As well as can be expected,” she said. “Frank was even…pleasant.”
“Really?” He raised an eyebrow. “And they said that Benny agreed to go for treatment, too?”
She nodded, which immediately brought out a smile that transformed Dennis’s whole face. Teresa loved it when he smiled. His built-for-serious-business look was definitely appealing, but this softer, warmer side of him was what had captured her heart from the first.
Lord, why is it so hard to take this next step? She knew what Dennis wanted from her, why he was so frustrated. She hadn’t liked it, but she now understood it.
Teresa squinted as the sun shining on the snow blinded her. Dennis picked the ax back up and gave some attention to the logs on the pile that were left to be split.
She couldn’t stand it anymore. And she knew she had to do something to break down this wall. It was, after all, the wall she’d created. With every slice of the ax, Teresa felt on edge. She didn’t want to go inside the cottage. It was too nice a day after all the snow they’d had last night. But she couldn’t think of a thing to say that wouldn’t lead the conversation to a place she’d worked so hard to avoid.
Instead, Teresa bent over a fresh pile of snow and began to roll it into a tiny ball. To her dismay, each time she got the ball moving, it would split or fall apart. After the third attempt, she stood straight up and balled her fists in frustration.
Dennis’s quiet snicker from across the yard had her turning to him with a mock glare. He’d been watching her, even if he was trying his best not to.
“If you think it’s so easy, why don’t you give it a try?”
“I’ve got to split some more wood.”
“What, for the whole county? You must have been at this for over an hour.”
“If you want to stay warm, I have to chop wood.”
She propped her mittened hands on her hips. “Dennis Harrington, there’s enough wood stacked in that bin and along the trees for someone to stay warm in both the house and the cottage the rest of this winter and all of next. You’re not fooling me. Your only excuse for continuing to split wood like you are is to keep yourself distracted.”
He stood and stared at her a second and then chuckled. “If that’s the case, I guess I’m not winning this battle.”
“Why does there need to be one?”
“I don’t know. You tell me. That’s all I’m waiting for. Just tell me, Teresa.”
It took everything in her not to stomp her foot like a two-year-old. Lord, is there a reason this has to be so hard?
A little voice in her head told her she already had the answer God would give her. Because anything worth having is worth fighting for.
Could Dennis understand? Yes, Dennis was a doctor, and he’d been there when people he treated died. But she doubted ever because he’d made a grave mistake. Could she claim the same?
His eyes were impossibly bright in the sunlight. He stood there looking utterly adorable with his ski jacket and plaid wool hat on his head.
Feeling playful, she bent down and fisted a clump of snow in her mitten and aimlessly tossed it at him. Dennis watched her pathetic attempt at a throw fall miserably apart before the last remains of the snow wasted away on the ground about four feet from his boots.
He lifted his head and grinned. “What was that supposed to do?”
She chuckled at her own awkwardness. She should feel foolish, but she really didn’t. Making a fool of herself in front of Dennis was easy. “Okay, so it’s been a while since I last threw a snowball. Cut me some slack.”
In challenge, she gathered another snowball in her hands and just stood there, eyeing him. When he just smirked and looked at her, she took a step closer and tossed a second snowball. It landed on his left boot with a splat.
His gaze dropped to his snow-covered boot then lifted to Teresa. She could hardly control herself. A giggle bubbled up her throat and became uncontrollable. In a feeble effort to contain herself, she placed her mittened hands, both covered with wet snow, over her mouth.
Within moments, Dennis was laughing, too, and she knew there was no holding the giggles back any longer.
“Don’t start something you’re not prepared to finish,” he warned her teasingly.
Straightening her spine, she propped her fists on her hips. “Are you afraid of a challenge, Dr. Harrington?”
“Never. But I like to fight fair, and I’ve seen just how handicapped you are with a snowball.”
“Oh, those are fighting words!”
Another giggle bubbled up from her throat, and she ran through the deep snow toward the long woodpile by the trees and gathered another snowball. She turned and suddenly Dennis was gone. Checking the fresh snow for tracks, she found nothing. Her own tracks clumsily cut a path to where she was standing.
“Dennis?” Teresa’s voice floated in the air. The sound of feet crunching on broken ice made her turn toward the back of the cottage. Dennis stood there with a large ball of snow in his hand.
Her heart beating faster, she tossed her snowball and ducked behind the woodpile in fear of retribution. When it didn’t come, she slowly rose high enough so she could make sure Dennis was still standing where he’d been by the cottage.
When she saw him, she burst out laughing. Dennis stood a few feet away from the cottage. She’d hit a bull’s-eye. A wet pack of snow had hit him square on the side of the head. The snow he’d had in his hands had fallen to the ground.
“I was keeping my best shot for when you were feeling cocky,” she said.
“Remind me to never underestimate you. I’m ready for you now, though.” Bending down, he gathered a big ball of snow in his hands and tightly packed it.
With his movement, Teresa spun on her heels, laughing as she raced in the other direction. She turned only when she’d shielded herself behind a big maple tree.
“Wimp,” he called out, standing out in the open.
“Some people would call me smart,” she called out.
The trunk of a tree wasn’t the best protection.
Teresa poked her head up from behind the tree just enough to gauge Dennis’s movement. The sheer joy and playfulness of Dennis’s expression made her heart squeeze. Whatever tension that had been between them earlier was now gone.
“Come on, Teresa,” he called out. “You chicken?”
A lone snowball flew threw the air and landed way to the left of him.
“That was a wimpy throw.”
“It was not!” she countered, standing up straight, leaving herself in full view.
He chose that moment to blast her with snowballs he’d stockpiled on the side of the cottage.
Even though she hunched down and hid behind her tree to avoid the impact, he managed to get her in the shoulder. The white powder sprayed into her face and down the front of her sweater. Needing better cover, she ran and ducked behind the woodpile again.
“We’re even,” Dennis called out through coned hands.
She couldn’t help but laugh at the fun she was having. The last time she’d engaged in a snowball fight was when she was in high school and it’d snowed during a homecoming football game. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had this much fun.
Teresa was silent. Dennis carefully stepped forward as he moved toward the log pile where he’d seen her hide. He’d be patient. Now that he’d seen this playfulness in Teresa, he wanted it to last. He’d make his move when ready.
When there was no movement from behind the woodpile, he taunted, “Had enough, Teresa?”
She remained still. The sounds of a woodchuck burrowing into a dead tree nearby and the creaking and groaning of pine trees as they swayed in the breeze were the only things he could hear. The smell of moist wood mingled with soft, wet earth. The sun beat mercilessly down on the snow around the woodpile, blinding him.
He loved days like this, and after the tension they’d both been feeling, Dennis was glad Teresa had chosen to be a little spontaneous. He liked this side of
her. He loved that she could let go of what was torturing her enough to just have fun with him and enjoy the day God had bestowed upon them.
Dennis shielded his eyes with the width of his fingers and waited for Teresa to make her move. And he knew she would. She had spunk, and he knew she wouldn’t let him off this easy, especially since she’d been the one to start this snowball fight. “Teresa?”
Silence.
Panic rose up inside him, slow at first and then growing in a crescendo when she remained quiet. Dropping the newly balled snow he had in his hand, he advanced toward the woodpile. “Teresa?”
When she still didn’t answer, his pace quickened. Had he hurt her? Certainly the impact of the snowball hadn’t been enough to do any harm, but maybe she’d hit her head on a log or a rock when she ducked down. He practically lunged to the other side of the woodpile without breathing. Immediately, he saw her scrunched down, her eyes wide-open and full of mischief, and knew he’d been had. He was barely through breathing a sigh of relief when Teresa jumped to her feet and dumped a bucket of snow over his head.
“You little cheat!”
“Oh, no,” she said, laughing as she ran around the opposite side of the woodpile into the yard. “All’s fair in snowball fights.”
“Is that so?”
“You’d better believe it.”
“Well, if that’s the case…” Dennis ran after her full force. The two of them proceeded to run in circles around the cottage, hiding and taking their best shots at each other, both getting doused with flying snow.
Finally winded and wet with snow, Teresa collapsed back down on the soft, cold ground, laughing uncontrollably. Tears streamed down her rosy cheeks along with melting ice crystals clinging to her skin from the snowball fight. Her laughter was infectious and took Dennis with her instantly until his stomach hurt from laughing. Dennis wanted to drink in every bit of this incredible woman.
He sank to his knees by Teresa’s side and thanked God that He’d brought this special lady into his life. She rolled over to face him. Holding his hand out to her, he said, “Come on. I’ll help you up. Your hair is soaking wet.”
“So is yours.”
“You’re going to freeze.”
She was leaning back on her arms now, her face dangerously close to his.
“You’re the doctor. Are you going to take care of me if I do?”
“It’d be my pleasure.”
Dennis held his breath, wanting just to bend his head and get a fraction closer to Teresa. He wanted to kiss her. He knew he shouldn’t. It wasn’t going to change anything. She still didn’t trust him with her past, which meant she still wasn’t ready for a relationship. That didn’t mean he didn’t want to kiss her with every fiber of his being.
“I can make you a mean chicken soup,” he said softly, brushing her wet hair away from her face.
“Let me translate this. You mean, Cammie gave you another recipe.”
He chuckled. “Actually, no. The ‘making’ part is me heating up the soup I’d get from Roma. She’s the one who’d make it, and it’s truly the best around.”
“That I believe.”
Teresa gazed up into his eyes, and she was so beautiful, it stole his breath away. He was going to kiss her. How could he not? He loved her, and that love was hard to ignore when she was looking at him this way. What he wouldn’t do to just forget all the reasons why he shouldn’t kiss her and just think of why he should.
When she looked up at him like he was the moon and the stars and the very earth beneath them, it didn’t feel wrong. It just felt natural, as if this was the way it was supposed to be.
As Dennis bent his head and kissed Teresa softly on the lips, he realized this kind of connection had been missing from his relationships before. Lord, why did You bring this amazing woman into my life now when there are so many hurdles left to jump?
He quickly forgot about those hurdles. He forgot about Benny, his sister and all the things he’d filled his days with to keep away the emptiness he hadn’t even understood he’d been feeling. What he had with Teresa was the very thing missing from his life. This was love. He was in love with this incredible woman in his arms.
When they parted, he looked deeply into her eyes and saw that emotion shining back at him. She cared for him, too—more than she was willing to admit. Oh, how he wished she would take that next step and just open her heart. He so wanted to take away that pain she felt and show her what kind of relationship they could have.
When Teresa was in his arms like she was now, he saw the future. Their future. It didn’t really matter if it was in Stockington Falls or anywhere else as long as they were together.
Teresa reached her arm up around him, and he drew her close. There was so much that still needed to be resolved before he could think beyond today. He pulled away, and immediately her expression collapsed.
“You have no idea how much I want to kiss you again, Teresa. How much I want to be close with you.”
“Is there a ‘but’ coming?”
He sighed. “I guess I’m selfish. I want your whole heart, not just the piece of you you’re willing to share with me.”
“I don’t understand. I thought we were sharing.”
“You know what I’m talking about.”
Her expression grew dark and serious. “You already know everything you need to know.”
“How do you know that?”
Her shoulders sagged. “Because you’re not a stupid man, Dennis. I know you read the papers. Why do you need me to talk about it at all?”
“I don’t need to know the facts. I need to hear it from you. I need you to tell me what happened and why it pains you so much. I need you to trust me.”
Instead of opening up to him the way he wanted her to, she pulled herself up from the ground.
“I do trust you, Dennis. But what do you want from me? Do you want a play-by-play like we did for Benny at Abbey Bridge?”
“If it helps, yes.”
She shook her head. “I’m not going there, Dennis. I messed up. That should be enough for you. Why can’t we leave it at that?”
He was standing in front of her now, his face still dripping with a mixture of sweat from running and melted flakes from the snowball fight. Remnants of snow still clung to Teresa’s hair and along the collar of her jacket, which was now wet.
“We’re never going to be able to have a relationship if you keep closing up like this.”
Tears filled her eyes. She glanced toward the cottage and said, “I’m going to go inside now and get changed.”
For a lingering moment, their gazes locked. More was said in those few seconds than had been said the entire time they’d been together. With great strength, he stepped away and allowed Teresa to walk away. He wanted to follow her. But she’d made herself clear. He’d prayed for God to give him direction. He was no closer to feeling secure in his position.
Dennis stood still in the cold, wet snow, watching as Teresa pushed through the slush. As she climbed the back porch, she didn’t pause at the door and turn to look at him. She just opened the glass door and walked inside, leaving him out in the cold to watch the steady stream of drops fall from the icicles lined along the roof.
Filling his lungs deeply with cold mountain air, he ran his wet, gloved hand over his face, coating more moisture on his already-wet skin from the wet glove. Looking up at the great big ocean of sky covering him, he searched for answers. Lord, I need them fast. I wouldn’t mind a helping hand here.
He genuinely cared for Teresa and could see a life together with her. She was special. There was a rarity about Teresa that reached out and grabbed something deep inside, pulling him to her right from the start.
There was nothing more that he wanted right then than to help Teresa break through the pain that had been holding her back. It was a risk, he knew. But it was one he was willing to take if it meant that she could be happy at last.
Chapter Sixteen
The automatic floodligh
ts went on, alerting Teresa when Dennis pulled his car into the driveway. She stoked the fire, opening the damper to give much-needed air to the stove to get it going without having a repeat of her 911 call to the Stockington Falls Fire Department. Dennis was at her door within a minute of her hearing the car door shut.
He knocked on the door before coming in, not waiting for her to respond.
“Are you already packed?” he asked, dragging his black wool scarf from his around his neck.
“Mostly. I still have a few things to get together.” She drew in a nervous breath. “The fire went dead. I forgot to load the stove this morning. So it’s still cold in here.”
“We could have dinner over at the house. Or if you want, we could have Roma fix us something.”
As Teresa gazed up at Dennis, a lump formed in her throat and a fear she hadn’t wanted to feel fully gripped her, holding her tight.
“I’m not sure that spending the evening together is such a good idea.”
Hurt clouded his handsome features. “Why not? It’s your last night here.”
“Exactly. It’s going to be hard enough leaving tomorrow without…us dragging out our goodbyes.”
She sighed, fighting to keep from showing the emotion that was eating her up inside.
Dennis bent down and kissed her on the cheek. She fought against leaning into the kiss, tilting her head so that their lips would meet instead. He smelled too good, and she knew for a fact that his kisses and embraces felt way too good for her to allow them to be her undoing. She knew what she had to do. She just didn’t want to do it. And being in Dennis’s arms would only cloud things for her.
The tired smile on his face wilted. “I didn’t think holding you a little while longer is such a bad thing.”
“I’m going back to Hartford tomorrow, Dennis.”
Dennis let out a slow breath and looked away resolutely. “I know.”
“You’ve always known I would at some point, and as much as I wasn’t sure I was ready to finally do it, working with Benny and seeing his courage convinced me it was important for me to go back whether I think I am ready for it or not.”
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