“Is this a job interview?” she asked.
“Something like that.”
“Hmmm. Let me think.”
Drew couldn’t see her expression. Was she leading him on, or did she not have a plan? She’d always had a plan in college.
“I guess I haven’t taken the time to think about exactly what I want or where I want to be in five years— shocking, I know— but I’ve been trying to take things as they come, and I hadn’t expected this job to last, but I like it a lot. I’ll keep working there for as long as it make sense. I enjoy traveling and meeting new people all the time. On the other hand, I’m not exactly getting any younger, and I’d like to have a family— maybe not five kids.” She turned to look him in the eye.
Drew laughed. “Would you want to stay home with the kids?”
“I think kids benefit from a parent at home, but I’m not sure I could see myself as a soccer mom. I guess the important thing is that I’m open to it, depending on how things go and the circumstances surrounding whenever my husband and I get to that point. Or maybe I’ll be the working parent, and he’ll be a stay-at-home dad.”
“Are you serious?” He knew it worked for some families but wasn’t sure if he would want to take time off work to raise the kids, even if his wife could make enough money for them to easily afford it.
“I don’t know, but it’s always an option. It’s a lot to figure out without any specifics. How about you? What do you see for yourself in five years?”
Drew didn’t know. He had thought he did, before this weekend, but after running into her again, he felt like looking at the matter with new eyes. Upon reflection, he supposed that it wasn’t a fair question— they hadn’t even figured out what they wanted, or didn’t want, from each other. Had it really only been a day since they had found each other again?
His head was so full of Colette that he couldn’t think straight. She had broken his heart once before— was he ready to put his heart on the line again for her? “I want a family and a wife who wants to build a life, not one who’s looking for separate lives, but using the same name. I’m not saying spouses can’t have their own interests, but I want to make sure we’re on the same wavelength and headed in the same direction.”
He realized why he had really brought up the whole discussion. He’d been brushing off echoes of the anxiety that had filled him in college when he told Colette how he felt about her, even though she had been dating Nick. No, because she had just started dating Nick. Normally, he was deliberate and thought things through— except, apparently, where she was concerned.
“I’ve been thinking that I wasn’t sure what I wanted, because I’ve been more than a little mixed up since seeing you yesterday. The truth is that it’s not complex, it’s actually very simple. I still want the future I see when I look at you; when I look to the future, I think of you and me. But you broke my heart, Colette. It messed me up, so I need you to be sure that you want to pursue something with me, wherever it might lead. That it’s not just the excitement of seeing each other again keeping us together.”
Colette opened her lips to say something more, then closed them again. “I don’t think we’ve known each other enough to be sure of what either of us really wants.” She looked at him for a long moment before pursuing what had been lingering behind her eyes. “I really wish I hadn’t been such an idiot when it came to you in college. And I wish you hadn’t turned your back on me. I understand why you did— or I tried to understand, anyway.”
Drew brushed the hair back from her face. “Me, too. More than ever. But I couldn’t stand to be your second choice when things imploded with Nick, and I was afraid you’d turn to me only because there was no one else there, and it wouldn’t mean what I wanted it to mean.”
“You could never be second best.”
The muscle of his arm contracted under her touch as he held back his immediate response to pick his words more carefully. “That’s nice of you to say, but we both know better. You turned your back on me the moment someone more interesting came along.”
Colette shook her head. “That wasn’t it at all.”
“It looked that way from where I was standing.”
“Maybe if you had stuck around a little longer instead of cutting me off, you would have learned the truth. You didn’t leave me a chance to explain or reconsider— you were just gone. The one time I tracked you down, you refused to listen. You weren’t the only one who was hurt, Drew. I needed you, and you wouldn’t listen. You knew I didn’t have anyone else, but it didn’t matter.”
Drew stood, surprised that he was worked up about it after so long; he had told himself he was over it, but apparently not. He needed a few minutes of space to process so he could finish the conversation calmly. “I need a minute.”
“Of course you do,” she muttered under her breath.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“You figure it out.”
He stalked down the next terminal, considering her words. Had cutting her off all those years ago been wrong? Besides the fact that it had obviously left her no one to turn to when things had ended with Nick, had it hurt himself, too?
By the time he made it back to Colette’s parting gate fifteen minutes later, he was calmer and ready to have an actual conversation. They were running out of time, and he wanted to get through this problem before it was too late. Otherwise this could end up in the pile of regrets he already lived with.
“It was hard watching you fawn over Nick,” he said when he reached her again. “I didn’t know how to deal with it, and I reacted badly.”
The look of irritation in her eyes hadn’t subsided while he’d calmed down. “It was hard being torn between you two. I didn’t think you saw me as anything but a friend until after I started dating him.” She lifted a palm to stop his retort. “Yes, we did things together, but it wasn’t like you ever told me that you liked me. Was I supposed to read your mind? Whenever you were uncomfortable about a topic— especially when it was about dating in any form, past or present, you would duck out of the conversation or change the subject.
“Nick was persuasive, actually making me feel guilty when I hesitated to make it exclusive. Deciding to date him was stupid. I know it now, but I didn’t see it at first. Then you suddenly decided to kiss me, out of the blue…”
It had been a stupid move. Maybe if he had done it a couple months sooner… “It didn’t feel at all out of the blue to me. I wanted to show you how I felt, but I wasn’t great with words then.” Not that he was feeling like a linguistic giant at the moment.
“You were great with words,” she corrected. ”You totally aced the poetry reading.”
“That’s different. They may have been my words, but they didn’t come from my heart; I wasn’t putting anything on the line. I risked something with you, and you rejected what I offered. I was humiliated, so I couldn’t face you again.”
“I was new to the area, I didn’t get along with my roommates, and you abandoned me. And as soon as you were out of the picture, there was Nick, tearing my confidence to shreds.”
Drew kept his mouth shut so he wouldn’t respond without thinking it through first. He had promised himself that he was going to listen this time, consider what she said, and face it. Today.
“You don’t have anything else to say?” she asked.
“Give me a minute. We obviously remember the past differently. I thought that I made it clear that I liked you. I spent practically every free minute with you.” Had it all been his fault— well, mostly been his fault, for not saying something sooner? It wasn’t like he forced her to go out with Nick— that was on her. But the rest of it, had he been so bad at showing her what he felt? Or had she been bad at reading the signs? Or both? He had known Nick was a jerk, but he hadn’t seen him with another girl enough to know he would tear her down like that.
“I can’t be sure about how I was really acting, but I admit that I was scared to talk to you about us. You weren’t like
any of the other girls I had spent time with, and you were too young for the way you made me feel.”
“I wasn’t that young.”
He smiled, remembering the unusually innocent eighteen-year-old. “Yeah, you were.”
Colette took his hand, her gaze searching his. “How do you feel now?”
He had been trying to figure that out since the previous day. This could be his last chance, and he didn’t want to lose her again. “I think we could actually make this work. Seeing you again has shown me that I’m not really over you.” He felt like his stomach was going to turn inside out and his heart was being slammed repeatedly by a lacrosse stick.
“Wow.” Her response was as dry as fading autumn leaves. “I feel positively blown away by all the love.”
“I told you I’m not very romantic.”
“No, you didn’t. You said you don’t believe Valentine’s Day is about real romance.” She paused and took in two deep breaths before finishing. “I think you’re probably a real romantic at heart. I thought so in college. I liked you then. A lot, but I was an idiot who gave up on getting your attention in that way just as Nick showed up, showering me with attention. It turns out that I still like you. A lot. I’m not sure if what I feel is a remnant of leftover feelings, or if it’s something we can actually build on.”
Drew was glad to at least have the truth— he figured he could work with that, one way or the other. “Then maybe it’s a good thing I have a wedding to go to, and you have a sister to sit and watch adrenaline-filled movies with.” He picked up her hand and held it loosely. “If you decide that you really want to see what’s between us, let me know.”
Colette nodded, wetting her lips and drawing his attention. “Okay, but I’ll need your number for that.” She pulled her cell phone from her pocket with her free hand.
Drew typed in his phone number, address and email— just to be thorough. He didn’t want any excuse for her to not be able to reach him. He took down her information as well, fully intending to use it.
They called the first boarding for her flight, and Drew looked up, surprised at the time. Where had it gone? He wasn’t ready.
Colette didn’t leave him a few minutes later when they called out that they were boarding zone two— her zone of the plane. She did, however, finally stand.
Drew joined her, taking her hand in his.
“Promise you’re not going to forget me as soon as I’m out of sight?” she asked.
“I promise.”
The woman at the counter announced, “Boarding all zones for flight number 346 to Kansas City.”
“Okay.” Colette’s gaze studied his face.
Drew glanced up and saw there were only a handful of people still in line to board.
He thought of the last time he had said goodbye to her, and of the awkward kiss he’d given her— at twenty-two he should have been a lot better at it, but she’d made him feel like he was fourteen all over again. He felt an echo of that while he studied her face, trying to memorize it before he leaned down and gently pressed her lips with his. If this was all he ever got, then he would take it while he still could.
Colette’s arms came up around his waist and pulled him closer. The softness of her fingertips brushed against the nape of his neck, and he forgot momentarily about the crowds of people around them.
“Last call for flight number 346 to Kansas City.”
Drew pulled back, though he didn’t want to. “Go, before you miss the flight.”
“I’ll call you,” she said, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and adjusting the purse over her shoulder.
“I’ll be waiting.”
She was the last one to enter the ramp. In the instant before they closed the door, Drew could have sworn he saw her looking back at him.
Her plane hadn’t even disconnected from the gangplank before he sent her a text message asking her to dinner the next weekend.
Chapter Six
The crowds at the airport after Colette left seemed considerably thinner. Drew was almost sure it wasn’t only because she was no longer there. Shortly after her plane touched down in Kansas City, she texted back that she was definitely up for dinner Saturday.
He slept a few hours using his duffel bag for a pillow, then grabbed a bite to eat from the food court before returning to his terminal to wait for his new flight. He felt grimy and rumpled and before they started boarding his plane, he sent his brother a text that he needed a shower first thing when he arrived.
Keith popped back that Drew could have anything he wanted, and that someone would be waiting for him at the airport.
Before the plane finished climbing to cruising altitude, Drew was asleep again. The chair was more comfortable than anything the airport had provided— not that the terminal chairs were much of a standard to beat— plus, he wasn’t worried about someone walking off with his stuff or one of the kids. He didn’t awaken until the captain announced that they would be landing in ten minutes.
“How long were you at that airport?” the old man beside him asked.
“A day and half.”
“Wow, I don’t envy you. That must have been horrible.”
It would have been without Colette, but Drew didn’t explain that to his neighbor, choosing to give the easy answer that it could have been worse.
Flynn, one of his cousins, was waiting by the time Drew reached the baggage claim area. “You arrived alive,” Flynn greeted. “You look a little worse for wear, though.”
“I feel it, too. I want a regular meal, a solid twenty minutes in the shower and three hours in a soft bed. Or maybe ten.” He still felt groggy from the long nap.
“Can you settle for two out of three? The bed will have to wait.” Flynn took the duffel from him as they moved to the baggage claim area.
“I’ll take what I can get. Keith said the rehearsal went well. How was the bachelor party?” Drew did his best to focus on his cousin and the wedding ahead, instead of letting his mind wander back to sitting on the airport floor playing Slapjack with Colette.
The shower was heaven, a bowl of Frosted Flakes never tasted so good, and the weather was beautiful. It was times like these when Drew seriously considered moving to Oregon, the way his brother was always coaxing him to.
He felt his phone buzz in his pocket when he had donned his rented tux. He pulled it out to see a note from Colette.
I hope you made it safely to Oregon. Sarah is doing much better today. I miss you already.
Drew grinned. I’m here, showered, had a proper breakfast of cold cereal, and am dressed for the wedding. I think I might even be able to stay awake for the ceremony. Maybe.
Colette: I wouldn’t be unhappy with a picture of you in that tux. I hope your brother has a lovely wedding.
Drew: I’ll be sure to send the picture. Thanks. Take care, I better get moving or someone is going to come up to find out why I’m not down there doing my job of best man.
Colette: TTYL
Considering that a good sign, Drew slid his phone back in his pocket and headed down the stairs to the room where Keith was getting ready for the ceremony.
“Wow, you look human. Flynn said you were pretty rough-looking when he picked you up.” Keith greeted him with a hug. “I’m glad you made it on time.”
“Me, too.” Drew hugged him back. “I still feel pretty ragged, but at least I don’t smell like it anymore. You ready for this?”
“Totally. This woman is amazing. Wait until you meet her.”
Drew was glad that even on his wedding day, Keith was still sure about his choice. He hoped to experience the same thing someday.
Chapter Seven
A decent night’s sleep in her own bed, a healthy breakfast, and some exercise had rejuvenated Colette, but she couldn’t help looking at her watch and wondering what Drew was up to, how the wedding was going, and if he was struggling to keep his eyes open.
After another long shower, Colette made a shopping list, rotated her laundry, and went ou
t to run her errands. For the next two weeks she’d be at home, training people who would be flying in to her office. She was glad to be in a familiar place and to have a chance to think through her feelings for Drew.
Spending two amazing days— okay, one and a half— with someone she was sure she could love gave her a better perspective on life. Everything in her snug little apartment seemed drabber. The week stretched out before her, and the time she had to get through before she could possibly see Drew again, seemed never-ending. Darn three-hour distance between their cities.
She received a text message from Sarah at three. The movies and cheesecake are waiting for whenever you get here.
Colette shot back that she would be arriving soon, and then she stopped for a bunch of roses and to pick up the pizza she had pre-ordered. It wouldn’t be the most romantic Valentine’s ever, but considering the evening she had spent with Drew before boarding her re-scheduled flight, she didn’t feel deprived.
“Happy Valentine’s Day!” she called to Sarah as she entered the house.
“You seem awfully chipper for someone who spent almost two days in an airport.” Sarah greeted her at the door and wrapped her in a hug.
“What’s not to be happy about? Did you get the movie?”
“Sorry, it was already rented, but I did pick up the first three Rush Hours.”
“That will have to do.” And it would fulfill Colette’s quota for explosions and suspense beautifully.
Sarah chatted away, obviously feeling much better a few days post-chemo.
They watched the first movie, eating their way through half the pizza, then paused between movies to put the food away and get out the cheesecake Sarah had ordered from an amazing local bakery.
“Why do you keep checking your phone?” Sarah asked, pausing the second movie. She looked worn out from the party, despite relaxing on the sofa most of the time.
“I don’t. I’ve only done it a few times.” Colette slid the device into her pocket. The wedding would be over, the dinner at least in full swing if not finished, and she hadn’t heard from Drew since that morning.
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