Right, breath. I could feel Laura’s fingers taking my pulse on my wrist as she looked at her watch.
“It’s too soon,” I chanted. “Too soon.”
“Focus Allison,” Laura demanded.
“Move out of my way,” I could hear Christina shout.
She was at my side, a fluff of tulle, sparkles and pure beauty. She smiled as she took my other hand. I could see the concern all over her face, but she forced a smile into place. Past her Cooper laid on the floor, my dad holding his wrist and speaking quietly to him. His eyes were closed and he looked a little too pale.
“You just had to upstage me didn’t you,” she teased.
“Sorry,” I managed before gritting my teeth as another contraction hit. “At least I didn’t get knocked up at your wedding.” She smiled as her eyes filled with tears.
“Well, no one can say we don’t have entertaining weddings.” Her smile helped me to focus.
Christina’s hand tightened on mine, tears falling gracefully from her eyes. I could see Sean behind her and I tried to process what he was doing with his cell phone. The small camera light flashed and I understood. He laughed and shook his head before slipping it into his pocket. He glanced at me and shrugged, smiling.
“Had to capture the moment. It is just too priceless.” His voice was unapologetic.
“Idiot.” Christina shouted over her shoulder, but she was smiling. “It really is priceless though,” she whispered so only I could hear.
“I heard that,” Sean called back.
In the distance I could hear muffled sirens and knew help was almost here. I saw Shannon with her arms out to her side, dealing with crowd control. She lived for high pressure situations so this must have been an unexpected delight for her. Sean and Christina’s friends slowly moved back in an attempt to give us space.
“Allison,” Cooper’s groggy voice cut through all the other noise.
“Cooper,” I almost cried with relief.
“I’m here baby,” he said clearer.
My dad had to force him to remain lying down.
“You hit your head son. You need to hold still until the EMTs can take a look at you.” Cooper struggled against my dad, but he looked dazed and kept blinking like he wasn’t sure exactly what was going on.
“Coming through,” loud voices shouted.
The paramedics were here making their way down the side of the church. Laura stood and started firing off all the vital information she had gathered since I announced I was in labor. She told them my heart rate, contraction time and explained that I was high risk. Then my dad started barking orders like he was on the job still, explaining that Cooper needed to be checked out since he had hit his head when he fainted. The male paramedic knelt next to me and smiled. The other one, the woman, was still talking with my dad and Laura as she crouched next to Cooper.
“I’m Matt and that is Melissa,” he said squatting next to me. His eyes were hazel and kind as he smiled at me, making me relax only a fraction. “We are going to make sure you and your baby are just fine, but I’m going to need you get you on the gurney if you can honey.”
I nodded and tightened my grip on Christina’s hand. Cooper’s eyes had opened fractionally and he was looking around like he was confused and couldn’t connect the dots as to what was going on. They lowered the gurney and Matt helped me into place, a few of the wedding guests clapped and cheered for me.
“I got blood here,” Matt said to his partner, his gloved hands moving the fabric of my bridesmaid dress.
“So do I,” Melissa called back.
Her response didn’t make sense to me and I tried to look around Matt’s broad shoulders to see what she was talking about. One of her hands was holding a piece of gauze to Cooper’s head and it was stained red. Her other hand was shining a pin light in his eyes. I was just so relieved to see him sitting up and responsive.
“It appears to be a concussion and he needs a few stitches to close this up,” Melissa confirmed.
“Let’s get them going,” Matt called to Melissa.
“Are you all right to walk?” The female paramedic asked my husband.
“I’m not leaving my wife,” Cooper told her with a large amount of ferocity. Hearing his voice back to normal was such a rush of relief that I almost felt lightheaded.
Melissa laughed. “He’s going to be just fine,” she confirmed.
Chapter Twenty Six
Cooper
Allison held my hand in a death grip while we rode in the ambulance. The paramedics had her hooked up to all kinds of machines that were beeping in sporadic rhythms. The look on her face took me to the scariest day in my life, watching as the aortic wall gave out before she went crashing to the ground. This time it had been me who had collapsed, but we were both once again riding in the back of an ambulance on the way to the hospital. One of the monitors started beeping more rapidly and Ali’s grasp grew tighter.
“Hang in there Allison, we’re almost there,” Matt told her.
Melissa wrote something on her clipboard and showed it to Matt. Matt ran his hand over his shaved head and frowned. He checked the monitor and then Ali’s radial pulse. They made a few more notes then handed me a fresh piece of gauze. I had soaked though several pieces already. I hit seems I had hit my head on the edge the pew when I went down. It was minor, but it was bleeding like I was dying. The EMTs intermittently took turns asking me random questions to make sure my head injury wasn’t more severe than they suspected.
The ambulance slowed and turned into the emergency bay at the hospital. They pulled out the gurney and someone was waiting with a wheelchair. Robert and Laura pulled in behind us and Laura jumped out of the car. She immediately went to Ali’s side, a cell phone pressed to her ear.
“Yes, I’m with her now,” she paused and listened. “Okay,” she said solemnly before hanging up.
They started to wheel Allison in on the gurney and I followed.
“Hold it,” Melissa said putting a firm hand on my chest. “That chair is for you. You’ve lost a lot of blood and they need to stitch you up before taking you up for a cat scan.”
Anger burned inside me. “I won’t leave my wife,” I challenged and tried to push by her.
“Yeah, I got that part. But you won’t be any good to her if you pass out again.”
Her brown hair was pulled back into a ponytail and her strong arms were covered with tattoos. She cocked an eyebrow which served as further evidence that she was a badass who would get her way, but I was more frustrated than I was intimidated. I tried to move from her grasp, but she held me in place with her piercing blue eyes. I hated that she had a good point. I sighed and slumped in the wheelchair, folding my arm across my chest.
“Good boy,” she teased and left me in the hands of a nurse.
Matt was still standing with Allison, holding her hand. He smiled and nodded pointing in my direction. Nurses were buzzing around her, hooking her up to new IV bags and resetting the monitors.
“Can you please wheel me next to my wife?” I asked the nurse curtly.
“I really need to suture your cut sir,” she protested. “And they are waiting for us upstairs for your scan.”
“Please,” I begged. She sighed and pushed me in Ali’s direction.
“Here he is now honey,” Matt said soothingly to Allison.
“Cooper,” she whimpered.
“I’m here babe. I’m right here.” I reached out and Matt put her hand in mine. He smiled down at me, his light brown eyes full of humor and compassion.
“All the luck in the world to you two,” he said before leaving us.
“Mister Perez, I’m going to stitch you up here next to your wife. I’m going to numb the area first and I need you to be very still.”
A poke to my scalp was followed by a slight burning sensation, but soon I couldn’t feel anything. The nurse sutured my head within a few minutes. Ali kept squeezing my hand every few minutes, either checking that I had not passed out on the floor again or because
she was having contractions.
“Ali-Ooops,” Robert Starr’s voice cut through the busy emergency room.
“Over here daddy,” Ali called to him.
He came charging our way, fear across his face. Before he could reach us, Doctor Johnson was at our side.
“What an exciting day you two have had. A wedding and a baby!”
“And he fainted,” Ali told her.
The doctor laughed and placed a hand lightly on my shoulder. “Well, we’ll be prepared if you are planning on doing it again. Things are going to move fast now. Ali, you’ve already been in labor for approximately twelve hours and your heart is showing signs of distress. Both Doctor Gilchrist’s and I were concerned about this very thing, putting the strain on childbirth on your heart. They are going to take you up to Labor and Delivery so we can properly determine what our next step will be.”
“Am I still going to have a cesarean?” Allison’s voice was filled with fear and tears were running freely from her eyes.
“That’s the plan. I have you on magnesium and terbutaline, both which should slow down the progression of your labor. Now, let’s get you upstairs.”
I tried to stand, I felt completely helpless in the wheelchair, but I couldn’t seem to make my legs work because they were shaking too much with terror.
“Mister Perez, please hold still. I’m still working on closing your wound.” The nurse barked. I had forgotten she was even working on me.
Robert stood next to me and I could see it in his posture. He was just as fearful as I was. Nurses in light blue scrubs worked together to move Ali onto her bed without disturbing all of the tubes and wires attached to her. There wasn’t enough room for us to fit in the elevator with her, so Robert took over pushing me in the wheelchair. The nurse followed behind us.
“It’s all happening again,” I choked out. Robert didn’t respond, tears of his own toppling over his lashes. “I can’t lose them.”
“Neither can I,” he whispered.
The elevator opened and we all piled in. Robert pushed the button for the second floor, Labor and Delivery, and the nurse pushed the button for the third. I turned to look at her and I could feel the scowl on my face.
“You still need your cat scan,” she said putting her hands on her hips, ready to combat me.
“It can wait,” I growled at her.
Her face was stone. “No. It can’t.”
I wanted to argue, to fight, but Robert’s strong hands held me by the shoulders, keeping me firmly seated in the wheelchair.
“Son, you hit your head hard. There is no use fighting us. The quicker you go up, the sooner you get back to your wife.”
I sighed hating the fact they were right. I looked up into Robert’s fierce eyes.
“You aren’t going to punch me in the face again are you?”
“I don’t know yet, son,” Robert smiled. “Maybe.”
Chapter Twenty Seven
Allison
“I feel funny,” I told one of the nurses who was helping me from my ruined dress and into a hospital gown. “Like I’m floating.”
She smiled at me. “That’s the medication honey. Enjoy it while you can.”
“Okay,” I smiled and closed my eyes.
When I opened them again my dad sat next to my bed in vigil, holding my cold hand with his eyes closed. Doctor Gilchrist and Doctor Johnson were talked to each other in hushed tones in the corner of the room.
“Hey baby girl,” my dad said softly, startling me. I smiled at him, but my eyes were scanning the room in search of Cooper.
Panic thumped through my veins. “Where is he?” I asked, trying to sit up. However, dad wouldn’t let me.
“He should be down here any moment, honey. They had to check his head and make sure he was all right.” My dad’s voice was almost too calm. I narrowed my eyes at him and took a deep breath. Coop had to be okay. There wasn’t any debating it. If he wasn’t, then I wasn’t. That is just how it worked with us.
The squeak of wheels brought my attention to the door. A very cranky Cooper came into the room being pushed by an exasperated nurse. She settled him next to my bed.
“He’s all yours,” she sighed. “I’ll be back soon to check on him, but if he shows any signs of distress page the nurse immediately.”
“We will,” my dad answered for us.
Coop’s brows were furrowed and he was biting on his thumb, a nervous habit. His eye blue eyes flickered toward me and then locked on my face. His features immediately softened. He pushed to stand, taking a few unsteady steps toward me. A calm settled over me as soon as his lips touched my forehead.
“You changed out of your tux,” I commented.
A smile pulled at his mouth. “They were nice enough to loan me a pair of scrubs since my clothes had a bit too much blood on them.” His hand ran gently over the top of my head and he kissed me again.
“How’s your head?” I tried to sit up remembering all the blood.
“Shh, it is fine. I’m fine. Lay back down babe.” His hands pushed me gently back to the bed.
“Allison,” Doctor Gilchrist came to the foot of my bed as Doctor Johnson checked the fetal monitor. “We were able to stop the contractions completely and need to proceed with the cesarean very soon. I don’t like what the stress is doing to your heart.”
“The baby appears to be doing well,” Doctor Johnson added. “But I agree, the sooner the better.”
“How soon?” I asked with a shaky voice.
“Within the hour,” Doctor Johnson answered. “The operating room has been booked, we just need you prepped.”
Cooper squeezed my hand and then kissed it. “This is it,” he whispered.
I felt cold and shaky. “It’s too soon,” I said to no one in particular.
“Well, that is a valid concern, but her lungs are developed enough. It’s going to be all right,” Doctor Johnson added with an encouraging smile.
Laura came striding into the room wearing her light blue scrubs. Her brown hair was neatly tucked into her surgical cap. She gave my father a quick kiss and whispered to him briefly. He nodded and smiled, but never took his eyes off of me. She gave him one last kiss on the cheek and then came over to us.
“There is a frantic bride and groom at the nurse’s station, along with your Aunt and mother-in-law,” she told me. “Christina got so feisty with one of the nurses that she almost called security. I have them settled in the waiting area.”
“Are they coming in here?” I asked.
“No, honey. It’s time to get you ready to deliver your daughter.”
The room was busy for a few minutes as IV bags were changed and vitals were checked. Laura helped me put on a surgical cap of my own as Cooper was putting covers over his shoes. It felt very surreal, like I was in a dream or the onset of a medical drama. After what felt like hours later Cooper stood next to me and we began the trek down the hall.
“Wait,” my dad called. The nurses stopped as he made his way to my side. He took my hand in his and bent closer to my level. “You’ll do just fine in there.” I didn’t know if he was trying to convince me or himself.
“I love you daddy,” I kissed his cheek and inhaled his familiar scent.
“I love you so much baby girl,” he said with a heavy voice.
“I’ll see you in just a little while and you can hold your granddaughter.” A genuine smile crossed his face.
“I’ll be with her the entire time Robert,” Laura promised him. She made no promises that I would be fine, just that I wouldn’t be alone. He nodded once and reluctantly released my hand. Before we left he hugged Cooper and whispered something that only he could hear.
The procedure room was very similar to the one where I had my heart surgery. Big lights blazed overhead and the scent of disinfectant filled the air. Both Laura and Coop helped me sit up. A tall man in the uniform blue scrubs stood in front of me, a mask covering his face.
“I’m Doctor Youngquist, the anesthesiologist,”
he told me. “The nurse is going to help you to hold still while I get your epidural going.” He turned to Cooper and said “You’re going to need to step out of the room.”
Cooper’s blue eyes closed for a moment before he kissed my hand. “I’ll be gone for just a few minutes,” he promised me. Ice cold apprehension gnawed on my nerves. Watching him leave made me want to break into a fit of tears.
Laura came around the table and pulled my head to her chest, then wrapped her arms around my shoulders. I put my hands on her waist and held as still as possible. The anesthesiologist draped my back with a sheet then sprayed it with something cold. Laura hummed and I focused all of my attention on the melody. If I even thought about what was being inserted into my spinal column I probably would have gone into a full blown panic attack.
“Can you feel this?” Doctor Youngquist asked.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I answered.
“All right, she’s ready.” He moved out of view.
Laura helped me lie back down. A sheet was set up to block me from the chest down. Cooper came bursting back into the room, his surgical cap crooked. It was a sign that he had taken it off and had been running his fingers through his hair. Doctor Gilchrist stood watch at my heart monitor and Doctor Johnson entered the room, hands up in what almost seemed to be a surrender position. Someone helped her into a coat and gloves. A mask already covered her face and her dark hair was hidden in a dark forest green surgical cap. She stood at the other side of the sheet. I could feel pressure at my abdomen, though it wasn’t painful, just uncomfortable.
“We’ll get started here in just a minute Allison,” she called over the soft seventies rock music that played in the background.
“I love you so much,” Cooper chanted in my ear. He put his forehead to mine and comforted me.
Suddenly it felt like all my insides were missing. I felt hollow and empty. The pressure on my stomach felt different, but the pressure in my chest grew. The operating room flew into action. Orders were being shouted from every direction. It seemed noisy and chaotic and I couldn’t understand why. Doctor Johnson said she would tell me when she started. The chatter and sounds became too much until I heard the only sound that mattered.
Lessons Learned Page 15