by Jo Leigh
“Why?’
He turned his attention back to her, expecting her to burst into flames at any second. But she’d lowered her hand and the blush was already fading. “Because we’ve just made a sex tape,” he said.
“I know.”
“Sam.”
It seemed she couldn’t tear her gaze away from the wall. “What?” She finally spared him a quick glance. “Aren’t you curious? I have no idea what went wrong, although I’ve had some issues with the programming in the past. It might stop or go back to thermal. Then again, it might not.”
“You want to watch us?” He sat forward, leaning on his elbows. “Really?”
“I don’t know.” She gave a small shrug. “Do you?”
“Is that a trick question?”
She laughed, but he sensed the nervousness behind it. “I’m going to destroy it, of course, but before I do— I mean, why not? It’s just us.”
“It’s one angle, and that’s not going to change. It’s focused on the whole bed. Are you sure you’re ready for that?”
She grinned and nodded.
“Jesus, you’re full of surprises, aren’t you?”
Her expression fell. “Look, we don’t have to watch it. I just thought—”
“I want to.” He caught her arm when she started to get up. “I’m sorry—I just don’t want you to become uncomfortable.”
She pulled him down into a quick kiss. “If either one of us says stop, we’ll stop it. Okay?”
“Okay,” he said, not sure if this was a mistake or not. He was tempted to skip watching the tape and just watch her.
She perched on her knees, running her hand over Matt’s chest as she watched. “This is weird. Do I really look that pale? And awkward?”
“What the hell are you talking about? You have porcelain skin, the softest I’ve ever touched. As for awkward, oh, honey, you are no such thing.”
“But look,” she said, pointing at where her legs were akimbo and her hair was half in her face.
“All I see is a beautiful woman. Nothing about you taking pleasure from your body is awkward.”
“You’re prejudiced.”
“Yep.”
They were quiet for a moment. Watching. It wasn’t the kind of sex you’d see in porn. It was slow. No music. But it was raw and exciting. The feeling of being inside her swept over him, making his cock harden, which was quite a feat, and his belly tense. It was a little crazy, considering what he’d just figured out. He touched her cheek, wondering if she was seeing the same thing he was. They weren’t just having sex. They were making love.
By all rights the realization should’ve scared the hell out of him.
“This makes me want you all over again,” he whispered.
“Prove it,” she said, her voice huskier than normal.
She lifted herself up, turned around and straddled his thighs. After studying him for a moment, she smiled. “I think there’s a way we can both watch the tape and do a live re-creation. If you’re up to it, that is.”
All his blood rushed south, but he was still able to nod.
* * *
A TICKLE WOKE Matt from the best dream he’d had in a long time. When he swiped the offending source of that tickle, he remembered. An even better reality was in his arms, her hair wandering over from what had become their pillow.
He’d imagined waking up to a note, with only the cold dent in the pillow to remind him of the night they’d shared. But he’d finally got his wish: he would get to spend a morning with Sam. They’d have some great coffee, take a shower together, and with any luck—
“What?” Sam turned and nearly beaned him with her head as she sat up. “Oh.”
“Good morning to you, too.”
She blinked at him, last night’s makeup giving her adorable raccoon eyes. “Sorry,” she said, trying to hold back a yawn, then giving it up. It was a very big yawn that made him yawn in return. “Did I wake you?”
“I think I woke you, even though I’m not sure how.” He turned on his back and checked the light behind the shades. It looked weirdly bright. “What time is it?”
“Oh, my God.” Sam let out a soft squeak. “It’s almost eleven.”
“Seriously? I never sleep this late.” He braced himself, expecting her to shoot out of bed.
But she didn’t. “Me neither.” She lay down again, on her side, her gaze meandering down his body as she rested her hand over his.
“Thank you,” he whispered.
“For what?”
“Spending the night. I liked waking up with you.”
Her lashes came down. “I’ve never done this before. Slept all night with someone.”
“Ever?”
“Nope.”
He turned his hand up and threaded their fingers. “Well, I’m glad to be the first.”
“It’s not as if I’ve been with many guys. So you might be the first and last.”
Matt had no idea what to say to that. Something about how she should make more time in her life for dating? That he wanted to be the one and only?
Did he want that?
“I don’t recall sleeping till eleven, either,” she said. “Well, obviously I must have when I was very young.”
“Sleeping late stopped for me my first year of law school,” Matt said. “Since then I’ve always had work to do. Even when I want to sleep in, my body is on a strict schedule. Makes hopping time zones a pain in the ass.”
Sam squeezed his hand but didn’t say anything, although it looked as if she might.
“What is it, Sammy?”
She kept her lashes lowered. “I was just wondering how much longer you planned on being here.”
Matt held back a grimace at the sickening thought that she’d overheard something about London last night. It wasn’t as if it were precisely a secret. But the fact remained—he hadn’t mentioned the possibility of his moving.
“Not that I’m trying to get rid of you.” She was looking at him now, but the little crinkle above her nose told him his answer mattered. “It’s just that Clark might have booked someone to come stay here next week. And since the gala is over and your, um, board meeting is tomorrow...” Her hand slipped away and she grabbed the covers that had fallen to her waist and pulled them up to her chin. “You’ve probably already booked your flight to New York, so I was just...wondering.”
Ah. This wasn’t about London.
His relief lasted all of five seconds.
It was still possible she did want to get rid of him. She was behind with work and he’d been a big distraction, so he couldn’t blame her if she did. Jesus. It had been her hesitation that made him nervous. She wasn’t normally like that. Sam just said whatever was on her mind.
This must be Sam at her most vulnerable. She’d been more relaxed at the damn gala. A few more seconds and the cloud lifted from his sleep-deprived brain. The question wasn’t about logistics or the apartment; it was more personal. Sam wanted to know about them.
“Don’t mind me,” she said. “I’m just rambling. I mean, this is why Clark handles the business side of things. You don’t have to leave unless you want to. It doesn’t matter, and I should get up because it’s eleven and...”
He kissed her, then moved back a little. “I’ll probably be in Boston through the week, but if you or Clark has booked the apartment, I can always stay at the hotel.”
“No,” she said, and there was the happy Sam in her voice again. “No, seriously. Stay as long as you like.”
Now he was really worried. There wasn’t a way this thing wouldn’t end with them apart. He’d probably be in London, and she’d be in her lab, too busy to get away for a day, let alone a couple of weeks. They’d both be up to their ears in work. But he wasn’t about to bring that up n
ow. Not until he knew for sure if he had the London job.
“So are we staying in or going out for breakfast? We can get dim sum at Myers & Chang,” he said. “Unless you have to work.”
“Nope. I’m not going anywhere near the lab today.”
A few days ago he would’ve been sending up fireworks that she was willing to spend all this time with him. Now he was wondering if he’d done her a huge disservice.
Hell, he’d worry later, he thought as she snuggled closer.
For now, he kissed her. Until her stomach grumbled so loudly they both cracked up.
* * *
“THERE’S EVERYTHING WE need to make waffles,” Sam said. “I specifically made sure of that.”
“I have no objection to waffles,” Matt said, amused by the argument they were having. “I’m just saying eggs and bacon would make a nice addition to the menu.”
“But I like my waffles a lot.”
“And...?”
“Notice I said waffles.”
“Ah, so no room at the inn, eh?”
She walked between his legs, which wasn’t difficult, because he was sitting on the counter that faced the living room. “Exactly,” she said. “Although what you said about bacon has a certain...”
“Je ne sais quoi?”
“I was going to say salty flavor, but je ne sais quoi works, too. Dammit.”
He wondered what she was cursing about until he recognized her ringtone coming from the purse she’d put on the couch.
“I should get that.” He watched her go. Damn, she looked good wearing his T-shirt and boxers.
“Yeah, what’s up?” she said.
As she listened, he could see her good mood dissolve like Alka-Seltzer in water. It had to be Clark. No one could douse her mood like him. At least, from what Matt had observed. For all he knew, Clark farted rainbows when he had Sam all to himself.
“What, so he can’t wait a few extra days? Screw him.” Now she was pacing. Matt deflated. He had the distinct feeling their breakfast was going to be a nonstarter. But what made him really uneasy was thinking about their earlier conversation. While he was jetting off to his job, he’d be leaving her with a shitload of work to do. Well, hell. He might not see a solution to their work conundrum, but at least Sam was going to get a damn waffle.
As he took out the waffle maker and the ingredients, he listened to Sam.
“I know we have a contract, Clark. What I’m saying is that even people with a contract can take a few days off. I told you he wanted it too soon to begin with.”
Matt paused between cracking two eggs. That didn’t sound like—
“Ugh, fine. You said that. Who cares? It was true.”
Matt nodded to himself and cracked the second egg.
“No, I don’t want to get sued. Come on. Offer something constructive instead of just being a butthead.”
Matt smiled as he measured flour and poured oil into the bowl.
“Oh, nice. So now it’s threats? You’re not farming out my work to Tina. She’s got a project, and she isn’t familiar with the job.”
Matt got out the whisk, but before he put it in the bowl, he turned, trying to get Sam’s attention. He wasn’t very subtle about it, waving the whisk in the air.
“Hold on. I— Hold on.” She pressed a button on her phone. “Yes?”
Her voice was a little sharp, which he understood. “If you need to go to the lab, that’s fine. I’ve actually got a few hours’ worth of work to do before the board meeting tomorrow. We can meet up later.”
“I don’t know. We were going to have breakfast and—”
“We’ll still have breakfast. Then I was planning to kick you out anyway, so you might as well go into work.”
She just looked at him.
He knew she could see through part of his lie. They’d already talked about spending the day together. But he could’ve just remembered he had something to do before the board meeting. He didn’t, but this way, she wouldn’t feel guilty.
“Fine.” She pressed another button on her phone. “I’ll be there in an hour.”
Matt started whisking the batter, satisfied he’d done the right thing, even though it felt like hell to give up a whole day alone with Sam. He’d wanted that. Badly.
The light had turned green on the waffle iron, so he poured the first batch. It was an odd machine. Much thinner than the kind that made the Belgian waffles he was used to. But it looked foolproof.
He glanced at her again. “Why don’t you go change while this is cooking?”
She looked sad but nodded.
“I’ll have your waffles and coffee waiting for you,” he said, keeping his tone light when all he wanted to do was throw everything at the wall.
She smiled. Took his face between her hands and kissed him soundly.
He put an arm around her. A mistake, for sure. Because now he didn’t want to let her go. But he did and then watched her hurry from the room.
The food was ready by the time she returned. From the damp ends of her hair, he could tell she’d taken a very short shower. Dammit, he’d wanted to take a long one with her.
She took a stick of butter, the maple syrup and the whole plateful of waffles to the counter by the stools.
“Huh.” He’d planned on sharing, but he guessed he’d have to make his own.
“This is delicious,” she said through her mouthful. “Better than the mix in the pantry.”
Well, shit. “There was a mix?”
* * *
AN HOUR LATER Matt was watching a movie on HBO when his dad called. “Hey, Dad.”
“Good afternoon, Matthew.”
“You sound cheerful.”
“Do I? Well, that must be because it looks as if we’ve got a lock on that London job of yours. Truit is still a holdout, but we don’t need that old windbag anyway. I don’t expect any surprises, but I won’t say congratulations yet.”
Matt should have been on his feet doing a fist pump, excited as hell. “That’s fantastic, Dad. How’d you get Bannister and Lee on board?”
His father went into all the details, and Matt had to force himself to pay attention. It wasn’t meant to feel like this. All the effort, the planning, the hours spent. Now taking over the London office had lost its luster. No, that wasn’t exactly true. He welcomed the challenge. Or would have if it didn’t put this thing between him and Sam into the dead file.
“What? No, I’m excited. I am. I just don’t want to go overboard until the votes are in, that’s all.”
His father agreed that was smart. They talked a few more minutes and then said their goodbyes.
The movie was no longer of interest to Matt, and sitting there with nothing to do but think was out of the question. He paced to the window, smiling as the floor tiles lit up with each footfall. Sam had an amazing imagination. No wonder she was slammed with orders. And as far as he knew, the apartment’s innovations weren’t actually on the market yet.
Goddammit. He ran his hands over his face. Was he ever going to be able to stop thinking about her? The mess he’d created was growing by leaps and bounds inside his head. Sticking around would just make him crazy.
There was only one thing he could do right now that might help. For a split second he experienced a prick of fear that he was reverting to his old destructive habits. But no, this was about needing some release. A workout was better than downing half a bottle of scotch.
Carrick was at the Southie gym when Matt showed up. But since it was a Sunday, there were fewer boxers around. He’d make do with the bags, but that wasn’t what he wanted.
“What are you doing here, son?” Matt noticed the older man was walking with a slight limp. He’d missed that last week.
“Looking for some ring time.”
“I might be able to fit you in. Hank,” he called out, “put Matt’s name on the big board, will ya? See who wants in.”
Someone from the benches on the other side of the ring called out, “Hey, pretty boy. We still got to be careful around your ugly mug?”
It was tempting to throw caution to the wind and just go for broke, but he still had to meet with the board. “Yep, watch the face. But everything else is fair game.”
He didn’t care about the taunting. While it should have felt good to realize he wasn’t a completely reckless kid anymore, all it did was make him feel...sad.
14
HER CELL PHONE RANG. It was Matt. Foolish of her to give him his own ringtone when he’d be gone soon.
Not a good thing to think about now.
She checked the time. Damn, she was already ten minutes late meeting him. “Hey.”
“Hi. Listen, I’m heading your way. Should be there in under five minutes. Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. I’m going to be even later. Anyway, I didn’t mean for us to meet here. I meant the apartment. But I’m not done my work, and there’s no way to put it off.”
“Oh,” Matt said, his voice dipping.
She knew she shouldn’t feel so pleased that she’d disappointed him, but it was reassuring. “I’m probably going to be another hour. I can’t imagine it taking much longer than that.”
“Tell you what. Since I’m already close, why don’t I come by the lab? I can amuse myself while you work. I promise not to bother you.”
Clark would freak out. There was no way. “I’ll go you one better,” she said. “You know my house is behind the lab, right?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll have Tina dash over there and turn off the alarm system and leave it unlocked. It’s still a mess, but it’s more comfortable than here. I’ve got a lot of stuff to play with. You’ll have a good time.”
“The only thing I want to play with is you.”
Sam pressed her lips together. “Stop it,” she said, glancing around as if someone could’ve heard him. “And don’t be afraid to touch the games. I break things regularly. Okay?”