by Mignon Mykel
Copyright © 2016 by Mignon Mykel
All rights reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a media retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the copyright owner and the publisher of this book, excepting of brief quotations for use in reviews.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblances to actual persons, living or dead, are entirely coincidental.
ASIN: B01N1M7Q4G
Cover Design: Designs by Dana
Formatting: oh so novel
Editor: Jenn Wood
All images have been purchased.
He calms me.
An unexpected long-distance friendship showed Gracelyn Dewey the ease of some relationships. Very few people could get past her walls and even then, fewer had the ability to see through her anxieties.
With him, she finds more—but circumstances wouldn’t allow them to keep it. Instead, they find an easy friendship with one another.
Until it wasn’t easy any more.
She grounds me.
In his line of work, Sawyer Meadows sees some gut wrenching things. He sees broken people, wounded people, fearful people. He loves his job, yet is losing a piece of himself in the mix.
But there was always her. Drawn to her quiet smile, he has always known she was meant to be something special to him.
A fact that became painfully evident when she found someone else to hold her.
Somewhere along the way, we lost it.
They are given one weekend together to fix their friendship.
The days can’t go off without any hitches though. When her recent past and his career collide, they’ll have to decide—is the distance enough to keep them apart? Or are they through letting everything else dictate their happiness?
She’s my saving grace, and I plan on saving her in the process.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Epilogue
About the Author
“I need you to love me a little louder today…”
Grace
I walked up to the mantel, picture frame in hand. I lifted the wood and glass frame and, without looking at the subjects, dusted off the glass with the sleeve of my sweatshirt.
I’d taken it down a few months ago out of respect for my then-boyfriend, but the picture deserved to be placed again. It was a good picture of a happier time.
Rising up on tiptoes, I placed the frame back in its once-before spot, visible but behind pictures of my pseudo-niece and nephews, and family.
Now…
Now I took a deep breath and looked at the people smiling back at me. My eyes teared up at the happiness beaming toward the camera, through the lens, and toward me. Happiness that was captured and would live on in photographic form forever.
If only friendships could stay like that—happy forever.
The picture was taken a couple of summers back, at my friends’ house.
Caleb and Sydney had invited me over for my birthday and, drinks and grilled food in our bellies, we moved on to a small bonfire after the baby was asleep. This particular picture was taken then, as Sydney’s brother, Sawyer, whispered something in my ear.
Quirky, if I remembered correctly.
He was grinning as he leaned into my ear and I was openly laughing.
I hadn’t even been aware that Sydney was taking the picture from the other side of the fire, but it was one of my favorites.
For five years, Sawyer had been my closest friend—even closer than Sydney was. He was one of the few people I could voice my fears to, could share my worries with, and still not feel shamed by the anxieties coursing through my head.
And then things changed.
There was once a time I didn’t go a day without receiving, or sending, a message of some sort from the man. We met and an easy friendship formed. I could still remember the first time I nervously played a voice mail from him. It took an hour for me to actually dial my number, my heart pounding in my chest…
First skipped message. October tenth. Three p.m.
“Hey, you’ve reached Grace. You know what to do.”
Beep.
Hey, Grace. It’s Sawyer. Sydney’s brother? We met last week at her engagement party. I mean, you gave me your number, so yeah. You must know who I am. *nervous chuckle* Anyway, I was wondering if you were going to be in the San Diego area next weekend. I was thinking of visiting her and the kids, and thought maybe we could grab dinner? Or coffee. Coffee’s good too. So yeah. Right. Anyway. I’ll talk to you later.
Click.
The months between Sydney and Caleb’s engagement party and the actual wedding were where our friendship easily blossomed. He came out to San Diego at least one weekend a month and if I didn’t see him at the Prescott house, we still managed to catch up over coffee before he flew back to Utah.
By the time the wedding came around, I was almost more comfortable with him than I was around Caleb, who I absolutely adored as a friend.
Grace, August 2nd, 8:14 am: Hey, Soy! The wedding of the year is this weekend; want to hang out before?
Sawyer, August 4th, 9:03 pm: What time was your layover in SLC?
Grace, August 4th, 9:05 pm: Why, you planning on changing flights ;)
Sawyer, August 4th, 9:16 pm: Would be more enjoyable…….
That weekend brought the slightest of changes to our friendship.
Sex did that.
Yes, I slept with the guy and while that could have done disasters for our growing friendship, it actually brought us closer. Gone were the sometimes awkward moments when we talked to one another. We were both well aware that our work and living situations didn’t jive well, so sex really had been a one-and-done kind of thing.
Sure, it was hard to look at him and not remember that, but it was what it was and even if we could have done that night over, I likely wouldn’t.
I was justifiably afraid that the wedding would bring a negative change to our friendship, of course.
Because sex did that, too.
The first time I called him after returning home…
I laughed lightly to myself at the memory. I was more nervous then than I had been when he first introduced himself to me at the engagement party! Thankfully, he hadn’t answered his phone.
“This is Sawyer. Sorry I can’t answer your call, but I’ll return it when I can.”
Beep.
Hey, Sawyer. Um. I had a lot of fun this weekend at the wedding. If you visit Syd anytime, call me. Maybe we could hook up. I mean, not hook up hook up, but you know. Hang out. Yeah. Um. Yes. Alright, yeah. Bye.
Click.
Soon, one year turned to two. We didn’t see each other as much, but we still talked. However, that was about the time that many of my anxieties started to set in. I’d al
ways been an anxious person, but there were times that not seeing Sawyer felt like he was pulling away.
The longer I didn’t hear from him, the more the thoughts started to swirl in my head. Did I text him? Call him? What if he didn’t want to hear from me and that was why he was being distant?
I knew he’d been busy with work but that did little to ease the worries.
I went from being excited to hear from him, to so nervous it would sometimes take hours, if not days, to reach out to him.
Sawyer, July 13, 6:55 am: How was the 4th? Wish I could have made it but WI wasn’t in my plans.
Grace, July 14, 9:00 am: Sorry I didn’t get back to you yesterday! It was good. We had fun. I mostly hung out with the baby ;)
Sawyer, July 14, 9:01 am: God I gotta see that kid before he turns eighteen ;)
Grace, July 14, 9:05 am: That busy huh?
Sawyer, July 14, 9:07 am: Btwn moving to SLC and training it’s been hectic that’s for sure.
Grace, July 14, 9:08 am: Syd can’t stop gushing over your promotion ^_^
Sawyer, July 14, 9:09 am: Lol
Grace, July 14, 9:15 am: Well I g2g. Good luck, Soy!
Sawyer had a way, though, of managing to calm my worries. He surprised me by showing up to my birthday that year, the year of the photograph. The moment I saw him, everything quieted.
I knew he’d been busy with work.
I knew he wasn’t blowing me off when he couldn’t talk or text.
And seeing him in person, so damned happy in life, turned my fears and worries where he was concerned, around. He’d made detective in a pretty harrowing division but he was so incredibly proud of his accomplishment. He’d been excited to work on the cases he would soon be receiving.
Before he flew back to Salt Lake City, I told him my biggest plans—I was going to open a store-front for my online boutique, Sweet Grace. It was terrifying, the thought of having to deal with people, face-to-face, on a near daily basis, but I was ready to bring on the next challenge.
Sawyer became my biggest cheerleader. Whenever I’d voice concerns over actually opening the store, wanting to scale back again, he helped me see the light. He didn’t push me into doing something I didn’t want, no, but he listened to my fears and helped direct me.
While I would have loved to have him at the store for its grand opening, hearing from him that night was just as good.
Sawyer, December 20, 7:56 pm: Heard congrats were in order.
Grace, December 20, 9:00 pm: Thank you! :D It was an exciting day.
Sawyer, December 20, 9:32 pm: I’ll have to stop in over Christmas.
Grace, December 20, 9:33 pm: I don’t carry anything in your size ;) But you’re coming for Christmas?!
Grace, December 20, 9:33 pm: I’m not that excited >?! It was a typo.
Sawyer, December 20, 9:34 pm: lol, uh huh sure. But yeah. The fam is going to Syd and caleb this year. Will you be around?
Grace, December 20, 9:36 pm: I can make time…….
Things stayed pretty much the same from that point forward.
If he could make it out to San Diego, I would see him at least once. I never made it out to Salt Lake City, and for that I felt like a crappy person, but it wasn’t something Sawyer ever brought up. Him coming out to the coast got him away from his day in and out.
But then there was this year.
I’d never been a dater. I didn’t care for the meeting of a person and awkwardly sitting across from them at a dinner you didn’t want. When I met Jeremy though, I decided that he was going to be my newest challenge.
I’d already accomplished moving away from home, opening up a store, opening up a store front…the next challenge I wanted, was dating.
And like any excited girl, I wanted to tell my best friend.
I refocused my eyes, pulling myself from my reverie, to the picture on the mantel. I wished I could have that happy again. I wished I could have that friendship again.
Because telling my best friend about Jeremy had been a colossal mistake.
Happy 5 Year Friend-iversary!
Grace July 10
to Sawyer
Happy 5 years-as-friends, Soy Sauce! ;) You must be busy, we haven’t text in a few months and I haven’t seen you in longer, but Sydney tells me you’re ridding the Salt Lake City area of nasty crimes. She also told me you’d been shot a few months ago and I was pissed I didn’t hear from you >:( But I’m over it now.
No really, I am ^_^
Sweet Grace has been doing really well. God, I can’t believe I opened the little boutique three years ago already.
Well, I know you’re busy saving the world and everything, but if you make your way out to the Bay, let me know. I have someone I want you to meet….
--Grace
Re: Happy 5 Year Friend-iversary!
Sawyer July 10
to Grace
Sorry I’ve been a terrible friend. That’s awesome about SG. I’m proud of you for accomplishing something that scared you. Don’t let those nasty voices tell you you aren’t good enough, Gracelyn. You’ve got this shit ;)
Sydney tells me you’ve met a guy and if that’s who you want me to meet…..? Be prepared for me to judge……..
& sorry I didn’t tell you about the massive bruise I was sporting for two weeks. I got hit in the Kevlar, it wasn’t too bad. We caught the guy and that’s all that matters.
I’m not on call next weekend; maybe I’ll fly out.
Your friend, Sawyer
Re: Happy 5 Year Friend-iversary!
Grace July 11
to Sawyer
You matter too, Sawyer Meadows.
-G
Grace, July 21, 20:34 pm: What did you think?
Grace, July 21, 21:03 pm: Your flight landed dude. Don’t you ignore me.
Sawyer, July 21, 21:04 pm: I’ll email you.
(no subject)
Sawyer July 21
to Grace
Drop him.
He’s a douche.
Re: (no subject)
Grace July 21
to Sawyer
What do you mean, drop him?! He’s a good guy…
Re: (no subject)
Sawyer July 21
to Grace
No. Just no, Gracie. He’s too possessive of you. Yet he couldn’t take his eyes off of Syd or any other female. No.
You could do so much better. Don’t settle for the first guy who gives you attention. He’s not going to understand you when it comes down to it…
Re: (no subject)
Grace July 21
to Sawyer
Maybe he already knows about my anxiety problems? You think of that?
And I’m not settling. That was mean of you to say.
How could I do better? Hmm? You? Oh yeah. We tried that already.
Re: (no subject)
Sawyer July 21
to Grace
We live in two different states, Grace.
Look, you wanted my opinion. That’s my opinion.
…I didn’t mean to hurt you.
-Sawyer
December
Sawyer
My brain hurt.
I was so fucking tired and my goddamned key wouldn’t fit in the lock.
Cases like last night’s were killer.
No pun intended.
A called in rape that turned into a missing person case, which fucking unfortunately turned into a homicide. This job was going to kill me.
At the very least, it was going to kill my personality.
I finally managed to get my key in the lock and pushed through my apartment door. I dropped my backpack near the door and closed the door quietly behind me. Just because I was awake at ten on a weeknight didn’t mean my neighbors were.
God, I needed a drink.
I toed off my shoes as I locked the deadbolt. When I turned, I tripped over the damn bag I put there.
“Fucking bag.”
When I went to pick it up though, I was reminded of my s
ister.
Sydney was notorious for leaving her bag by the door—from childhood to, as far as I knew, now. I squeezed the bridge of my nose when I realized I never called her today. I called her every day, no matter what the day brought to my doorstep.
Even though I knew it was ten, I glanced at the clock, trying to figure out what she and her husband would be doing right now. It was nine in San Diego; my nephews and niece were likely already in bed. My brother-in-law was a professional hockey player, but I didn’t know if he’d had a game tonight. If he did, the house would still be up. If he didn’t…
Maybe they’d still be up. It was only nine.
I picked up my cell and decided to call their house phone. That way if the two of them were out on a date or something, I wouldn’t be a bother.
As the phone rang in my ear, I took off my dark Ralph Lauren suit jacket, laying it over the back of my second-hand micro suede couch. Spotting the television remote, I picked it up and pulled up the viewing guide, trying to figure out if the Enforcers, the team my brother-in-law played for, had a game tonight. At the fifth ring, I was about to hang up and just text Syd, but the phone was answered.
“Hey, Soy.”
Caleb.
So, no game.
I turned off the television, now knowing that he hadn’t played tonight, and not needing the background noise to add to the stress going on in my brain. I needed quiet tonight.
I tossed the remote on the couch. “Hey, Caleb. No game?” Obviously, I now knew this, but sometimes making small talk with my brother-in-law was awkward. My very first impression of him hadn’t been the best.
Nor had my second.
But he was a good guy in the end.
“Nah, no game. You looking for Syd? She’s out.”
“Shit,” I mumbled, tucking the phone between my shoulder and ear to untuck my dress shirt from my dark jeans. I lost my tie and unbuttoned the top of my shirt long ago.