by Doporto, CM
“I’ll be working in the sales and marketing division.” He cleared his throat a few times.
“Makes sense, since you like people. I wonder if you and Lise will be working together. She’ll be interning in the marketing department too.”
“Hmmm, I don’t know. I guess I’ll find out week after next. What department will you be interning at?”
“The main lab.”
“That’s awesome. I wonder if you will be working with Dr. Kronberg?”
“I hope so. I can’t wait to meet him.”
Natalie struggled to keep her attention on the path they rode down. Her gaze kept wandering over to him, admiring the way he looked wearing a cowboy hat and fitted shirt which outlined every bulge in his upper body. Not to mention the jeans that hugged his body perfectly. Cowboys never caught her attention in the past but he sure grabbed her’s.
“It feels so free out here. Free from stress, free from the worries of life.” She breathed in the fresh country air, clearing her mind. It felt good to get away and enjoy nature. Something she hadn’t done in a while.
“It is nice out here. That’s why I don’t mind coming home on occasion. I’m glad ya came over.” Ryan reached his hand out and she latched on to it.
“Me too.” They held hands for a short while until the horses drifted further apart and her hand slid from his.
She continued to take in the pure air, allowing it to filter through her airways. She loved the way the air blew through her hair and it made her eager to feel the wind against her entire body. Adrenaline flowed through her veins and she yearned to let Freedom ride freely.
“I’ll race you to the creek!” Natalie leaned forward and gripped the reins tightly and ordered the horse to sprint.
“Natalie….wait! I don’t think —” Ryan yelled out as she darted off.
She ignored his warning and pressed forward. Several yards later she looked over her shoulder and saw Ryan close behind. She laughed and leaned into Freedom, encouraging him to go faster. This was not like her to do something so reckless, but she couldn’t help it. The wind felt liberating as she sped across the open land.
Slowly, she raised her body up and took a deep breath. She felt brave and strong. Without much thought she let go of the reins and raised her hands up high toward the sky. She closed her eyes and imagined herself flying through the air; soaring over the vast open land to the wooded areas and down to the lake. She blocked everything from her mind and concentrated only on the sweet smell of the white jasmine shrubs blooming nearby.
“Natalie. Natalie. Stop! Stop!” Ryan yelled.
Natalie paid no attention to Ryan’s pleas. The feelings going through her body consumed every part of her. Her body was becoming one with nature. The wind seemed to flow through her, lifting her higher and higher. It howled and lashed against her body giving her the sensation of power and strength.
“Natalie….Natalie! Look! Look!” Ryan continued to holler in the distance.
Natalie struggled to separate herself from the wind and break the trance that consumed her. She sensed something was wrong and quickly opened her eyes when she heard Ryan’s frantic cry.
“Natalie. Stop! Stop!”
She grabbed the reins and pulled on them tightly urging Freedom to halt. The horse came to a sudden stop. She looked around trying to figure out why he sounded panicked. He pointed toward the horizon.
“What is that?” Natalie steadied the horse while her eyes took in the implausible sight. “Easy Freedom.” She coaxed the horse but he skittered around nervously.
In the near distance a warm reddish brown haze expanded across the open land. It rolled in, taking the form of a massive cloud, billowing and consuming everything in its path. The haze was headed in their direction.
Breathing heavily, Ryan struggled to speak. “It’s…it’s a dust storm. And it’s moving toward us. We gotta go… now.”
She watched the haze roll in like smoke billowing up from a forest fire. “In North Texas? I thought only West Texas gets dust storms?”
“My family said we’ve been getting them here lately, and they’re violent.” Ryan guided the horses to turn around. “C’mon, let’s go!” Ryan made a tsk tsk noise with his mouth and commanded the horses to move forward. Even though the horses panted heavily, they didn’t hesitate and quickly shifted into a sprint.
“We’ll shoot for the barn... over there. It’s a mile. See it?” The wind made it difficult to hear him, chopping every other word off. She followed his hand in the direction he pointed to and she saw their target destination.
“I can see it. Do you think we’ll make it?” she shouted back.
“I hope so.” Ryan yelled at the top of his lungs.
She glanced over her shoulder. The storm had to be only a few yards away. It didn’t take long for the fresh country air to be replaced by thick, gritty dirt. The horses slowed down as the storm surrounded then. Natalie coughed, inhaling the reddish dust with every breath she took.
Ryan pulled out the handkerchief from his back pocket. He guided his horse closer to Natalie and handed it to her. “Put this on. It’ll help,” he choked out the words, coughing and wheezing.
Natalie nodded and grabbed it from his hand. “What about you?”
Ryan let go of the reigns and took hold of his shirt and ripped it open. “I’ll use this.” He tied it around his face, covering his nose and mouth.
Darkness swiftly filled in between them and she lost sight of him. She reached up and pulled off her sunglasses only to realize that she needed them on. They protected her eyes from the dirt that now stung her eyes and made them water.
“Ryan…Ryan…Where are you?” she called out, her hand wavering back and forth in the dust. The thick and dark air made it impossible for her to find him. Freedom scampered and skittered around nervously in a circle and she struggled to get him under control. Then she heard his horse neighing.
“I’m right here. Where are you? We’ll have to walk the horses.” His voice trailed off, lost in the whirling wind.
She fought to remain calm. “Ooohhh...Ookkaaay,” she muttered under the cloth. Then Freedom came to a complete stop and refused to move.
“Whoa…. Whoa Girl.” Ryan suddenly yelled and she turned, searching in all directions. Then she heard him command the horse. “Stop! Stop!”
“Ryan… Ryan—” Natalie reached out into the darkness, not finding him. “Where are you?” she continued to call out. The dirt burned her eyes and a lump formed in the back of her throat. Flashes of her near death plane ride a few months ago crept into her mind and caused fear to take over. She swallowed back the tears. Now was not the time to give into it.
She got off the horse and pulled his face close to hers. Freedom kept his eyes closed apparently trying to avoid the needle-like pricks of the whipping dirt. She checked his saddle, searching for something to cover up his head. Then she remembered she had on a tank top under her shirt. Thank God. Quickly she took off her shirt and put it around the horse’s face.
“You’re okay boy.” She patted Freedom, reassuring him. She hugged the horse’s neck and spoke into his ear. “Freedom we will make it to the barn. You have to trust me, okay. Let’s go boy.” She pulled on the reins but he hesitated at first. She persuaded him until he followed her lead.
Natalie had no idea if they were headed in the right direction. The thick air caused visibility to be near zero. Completely alone and in the middle of a storm, she feared the worse. She could see it all happening again, just like the storm that hit the plane. Would she make it out alive this time? She fought the feelings of despair and fear, determined to survive.
She closed her eyes and focused on her surroundings. She shuffled her feet along the ground, persevering through the storm. The dirt-filled wind thrashed against her face, stinging her skin like a horrible sunburn after a day at the beach. She itched and burned as the dust entered in through her pores.
She kept her eyes closed, allowing her senses to fully
take over. Somehow, the dirt gave her confidence and strength. It allowed her body to connect with the earth until she became one with it. She felt the ground moving and the entire earth rotating along its axis. Guide me mother earth. Guide me. At that moment, something deep within her stirred. All her surroundings aligned perfectly, like a navigational compass, telling her the cardinal directions. It pulled her body and guided her footsteps along the right course.
Natalie opened her eyes. Through the thick brownish-red dust, she saw something. She kept her eyes fixed until the air thinned enough to reveal the green barn straight ahead of them. The sight of it brought instant relief and calmness to her. Step by step she made her way to the barn, pulling Freedom at her side.
“We made it, Freedom. Thank God, we made it.” She reached for the handle on the barn door to open it. At the same time, it slid open and a hand reached for her.
“Natalie, oh thank God, you’re okay.” Ryan pushed the door open further allowing her and Freedom to get in.
“Yes, we made it.” Natalie leaped into his arms.
Ryan embraced her, holding her close. “I was so worried about you.”
She took off her sunglasses and buried her face against his chest. Tears streamed down her face, scalding her eyes. “I was so scared. I thought I might die out there.”
He leaned his head back and cradled her face with both his hands. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t leave you out there on purpose. Please believe me.”
“What happened to you?” Her voice quivered and she swallowed several times, trying to clear her throat from the dust and dirt that scraped her mouth like sand paper.
“My horse took off riding like a bat out of hell. She brought me straight to the barn. I felt horrible leaving you behind. I was waiting for the storm to pass before I went out to look for you. I’m so sorry I left you out there by yourself.” He wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs in soft gliding movements.
Her heart told her he didn’t leave her intentionally. She just happened to get caught in another freak of nature storm. Why did these things keep happening to her? First it was the plane ride and now the dust storm. She had potentially come close to death not once, but twice now.
Natalie sighed heavily, still crying. “Thank God, I made it to the barn alive. Freedom got scared and wouldn’t move. I used my shirt and put it around his head. Oh no, I think I lost your sister’s hat.”
“It’s okay. It’s over.”
“Then….then something overcame me and my body…” she couldn’t stop the sobs.
Ryan placed his index finger over her lips. “Shhhh. You’re gonna be alright. You’re safe now. That’s all that matters.” He pulled her close to him and began to stroke her hair, easing the fear away with the gentle caress of his hand.
Her tears slowly ceased. Being in Ryan’s arms did make her feel safe. Safe from everything. She didn’t want to leave his arms ever. She nestled herself closer to him, allowing her hand and cheek to rest on his chest. The warmth of his skin relaxed her and that’s when she realized she was touching his bare skin. Through all the pandemonium she failed to notice he didn’t have a shirt on. How did she miss that?
She kept her hand steady and allowed her eyes to survey his finely sculpted pecks and abs. What her hands felt that night on the dance floor was real, very real. Ryan’s body was damn hot. A fine layer of dirt covered his bare chest and his hair stuck up in all directions. The scruffy look only made him sexier.
He lifted her chin and stared into her eyes. “You are so beautiful, Natalie.” His hand glided down her hair to her arm sending chills all over her body.
She gazed into his bloodshot red eyes. “Even with all this dirt on me?”
Ryan nodded. “Yes, beautiful. Dirt or no dirt, you’re gorgeous to me no matter what.”
Either he was crazy for thinking she looked good sporting the UT burnt orange dirt all over her body or somehow her beauty blinded him. Regardless, he knew the right words to speak. “Oh Ryan, you are a sweetheart.”
He picked up her hand from his chest and brushed his lips across the top of it. She closed her eyes, savoring the touch of his dry lips against her scorched skin. She wanted to feel his lips against hers. Glide her body against his bare skin. The demand of his touch focused her mind on one mission and one mission only, she wanted him. Then she remembered they both agreed to take it slow and get to know one another. What was wrong with her? She didn’t want to have sex with him. She barely knew him and it went against all her rules. Why couldn’t she control her emotions? She convinced herself that it had to be the near death experience driving them closer together.
Ryan tightened his arm around her waist and pressed his body firmly against hers. He released her hand and then cupped her cheek. The warmth of his breath spread across her face, inviting her lips to meet his. She moved in toward him, moistening her lips with her tongue. Her heart drummed in her ear and her lips quivered waiting to surrender to his call.
A loud thud sounded, calling their attention away from one another. The barn door swung open, allowing a ray of light to shine directly upon them. They pulled away, and used their hands to shield their sensitive eyes from the blinding light.
“Thank God, y’all are safe. That was one heck of a storm.” Lance walked in rambling on and on. They stood looking at him, but neither one spoke a word.
His eyes darted back and forth between them and he cleared his throat. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to… ummm.”
“Yeah, we didn’t think we would make it.” Ryan drew Natalie close to him. “But we are safe.”
She looked up at Ryan, “Yes, I’m safe now, safe in your arms.”
Chapter 5: Unexplainable Changes
“You’re glowing. Don’t deny it. You spent the weekend with Ryan, didn’t you?” Lise glanced up from her text book, eyeing Natalie.
Natalie fumbled to unpack her clothes from her bags, avoiding her friend’s gaze. “What?”
“You can’t play dumb with me. I see it written all over your face.” Lise motioned with her finger and then went back to reading her book.
Natalie finally looked up. She pressed her lips together, trying to conceal her happiness. It was no use. Her lips parted into a wide smile. “Not the entire weekend, only Saturday.”
“I knew it.” Lise shut her textbook and tossed it to the side. “Why didn’t you text me back?” She sprang up off her bed and rushed to Natalie’s side.
“Sorry, I got side tracked.” Natalie shrugged and then walked over to the bathroom to put up her toiletries.
Lise followed her around the room. “Tell me all about it? Did you sleep with him?”
“What? No… of course not.” Natalie continued to put her things away, still avoiding any direct face contact with Lise.
“Oh man.” Lise pouted and sat down on her bed. “Nat, please tell me you at least made out.”
Natalie walked out of the bathroom. “Ummm, no Lise we didn’t.”
“Then why do you keep smiling?” Lise pounded her hands into the mattress.
Natalie turned around, trying to hide her happiness. Nonchalantly, like she didn’t know her friend was dying for information, she dumped a bag of clean clothes on the bed and began to fold them. She knew Lise would hound her until she told her every last detail.
“Nat, tell me.”
Natalie tossed the pair of socks in her hands to the side and fell back on the pile of clothes. “Because I had another near death experience and it was wonderful.” She crossed her hands over her heart and closed her eyes. Thoughts of Ryan flooded her mind. Even though the dust storm scared her to death, she didn’t regret the time they spent together. She could still smell him, taste him, and feel him.
“What? You had…I’m confused. You’re happy because you almost died, again?”
Natalie opened her eyes and focused in on what Lise said. She sat up. “No. I mean, yes. I did have another near death experience but it ended quite well.”
Lise smiled. �
�I guess so, because you’re still alive and smiling like he rocked your world.”
She giggled. “Let me explain. We went horseback riding on his ranch—”
“He invited you over to his house? His parent’s place?”
Natalie narrowed her eyes at Lise, warning her to stop. “Yes. Can I finish?”
“Sorry.” Lise chewed on her lower lip.
“What? Go ahead, Lise.” Natalie got up and then scooted over the pile of clothes, clearing a spot on the bed to sit down.
“He must really like you. If a guy invites you over to meet his parents—”
“Wait. I didn’t say that. His parents weren’t home. I did meet his brother and his brother’s family.”
“Still. Okay, you met half of his family… which means he must really like you.” Lise’s voice escalated. She did a happy dance staying seated and for a moment she acted like her world had been rocked.
Natalie shook her head, unable to understand how everything excited Lise. “I guess if you say so. Anyhow, we went riding and there was a horrible dust storm. Violent.”
“OMG! Seriously?”
Natalie put her finger to her lips, instructing Lise to stay quiet and let her finish. Lise pretended to zip her mouth close.
“Yes, a horrible storm. I honestly thought that I might die. She shivered, recalling how the thick clouds of dust surrounded her and blinded her sight. We got separated. Eventually we both found our way back to a barn.”
Lise smiled. “Let me guess. I know what happened next.” She grabbed a small bed pillow and held it tightly to her chest.
“Not what you think. It was intense. He held me, caressed me, and told me I was beautiful. I got to bury my face against his bare muscular chest. Boy, does he have muscles. Whoa.” Natalie fanned herself. “Let me think what else.”
Lise practically cried over the story. “You two kissed and it was wonderful.”
Natalie sighed. “Actually, no. We didn’t.”
“No? You didn’t kiss?” Her smile quickly turned into a frown.