by D L Lane
“Oh, stop it, Samuel,” her mother admonished, then looked at her. “He won’t be doing any such thing.”
“Watch me, woman. Our daughter about gave me heart failure with that routine.”
Her parents started in, arguing as her gaze shifted over to her grandfather, who’s lined face didn’t look any too happy either. Then she looked at Gage and Mason. They were doing that thing they do—having an entire silent conversation with their eyes and body language as they stared at each other.
“Guys?”
They looked at her in unison, aqua blue eyes, and stunning silver.
“What did you think?” Biting her lip, she waited for the verdict.
“You were pretty awesome,” Mason said, taking hold of Breckin’s hand. “Congrats on winning.”
Her heart swelled. “Thanks.”
She looked at Gage, who didn’t have any expression at all as he said, “You did an amazing job, Danny.” His was the opinion she wanted to hear the most, so she smiled wide until the, “But, your dad has a valid point. It was a bit risqué for someone your age.”
Someone your age.
Just like that, all her buoyancy left—a hole punched into a tire, she went flat.
“Exactly!” Dad patted Gage on the back like a proud father agreeing with a son
.
Chapter Nine
Bouncing a fussy boy who was hanging on her hip, listening to his sister start to whimper in solidarity from her highchair, Danica was warming up some leftover green beans from the dinner she had made for Marcus the night before. The dinner he didn’t make it to. It had been three days since he’d left her at Breck and Mase’s wedding reception, and she’d scarcely seen him at all.
“Ya, ya, na!” Ari screeched, little palms slapping the tray of the chair.
“Hang in there, love,” Danica said.
“Ba-ba.” Aaron’s chin started to quiver, a sure sign of doom.
Putting a little dance move into the bounce, hoping to settle her baby down, she watched the carousel go around inside the microwave, taking the beans with it. Once done, she’d smash them with a fork and put the veggies into the divided plates, making sure not to get them mixed into the soft carrots, or cut up hotdogs. If she did, Ari would scream bloody murder. Baby girl didn’t like any of her food to touch.
Aaron arched his back, and kicked his feet. “Aaahna!”
“Hush, now.” She took the bowl out of the microwave. “Mommy is hurrying as fast as she can.”
All that did was make him cry, big fat tears falling down his angry face.
“Look,” she said, opening a kitchen drawer and pulling out some utensils, allowing them to clatter because he usually liked the sound. “We’re almost done here, then you can eat.”
“Na, na!” Ari bellowed, reached and pulled off one of her socks, curling her tiny toes.
“Mommy will take you guys to the park later to play. Wouldn’t you like that?”
A disgruntled squawk was her daughter’s response.
Trying to make quick work of destroying the texture of the green beans, the double whammy came. Both of Danica’s children were bawling and vocalizing at the top of their lungs.
She loved her babies with all her heart; she did, but sometimes she just wanted to run and hide out in a nice, quiet place, maybe do nothing but stare at the wall. A couple of months after the twins were born, there was only one word to describe her. Exhausted. It was bone-deep, a result of the wake-up cries coming over the baby monitor. They arrived at all hours of the night, and she was the only one to get up and handle whatever the crisis was—dirty diaper, needing a bottle, etc. so due to her lack of quality sleep, she had a horrible pounding headache.
“Marcus, my head is killing me,” she’d said. “Could you watch the twins? Maybe read them something from one of the children’s books Breckin bought them so I can take a bath?”
She had been envisioning a long, languorous soak in her jetted tub, but he had paperwork to do, and so came the words she would hear time and time again. “I can’t right now, honey,” before shutting himself up in his home office.
Just one fifteen-minute bath would be a luxury at this point. Danica even had daydreams about being surrounded in warmth and bubbles but had resorted to taking showers so fast it was if she were on water rations. And alone time in the bathroom to do her other business? Yeah, didn’t happen.
“Babe,” she’d said, barely keeping her eyes open one evening when he was home. “I’m so tired.”
Marcus kissed her forehead. “You need to learn to nap when the twins do.”
Sounded reasonable, right? She’d tried a few times, but the moment she would lie down, she’d need to get back up and take care of one or the other crying kids, sometimes both at the same time. So, naps? What were those?
From day one, Marcus had never so much as changed a diaper, and she wished he’d help with something.
During the summer, she’d come down with a nasty flu and was seriously worried, not knowing how she was going to take care of Aaron and Ari since it felt as though her head had turned into a swollen pumpkin and her throat flamed. When the vomiting started, all she wanted to do was curl up and die. But Breck and Mase, God bless them, came over and took care of things so she could burrow under the covers in her bed.
Danica’s days were filled with bottles to wash, mountains of laundry to do, toys to pick up and sanitize, floors to clean, bedding that needed changing, dishes to pop into the dishwasher, then take out and put away, diaper pales to empty, baths for the babies. And don’t even get her started on the monumental chore of grocery shopping!
Aaron’s high-pitched squeal of discontent pierced her ears, followed by Ari’s accompanying shriek.
Danica blew out a breath. “Sometimes, Mommy wishes she could clone herself.”
If she were lucky enough to see her husband before going to bed that night, she was finally going to talk with him about hiring someone to help her; sure, he’d be okay with it.
The thought of assistance made her smile.
Putting a wiggling Aaron into his highchair was a task, but she managed to get him seated and the seat belt on, then went back to get the plates. She knew from experience not to place them on the trays—small hands would grab, lunch would go flying or end up smooshed into their hair, so from her position in front of them, she sat, forked a bite of food, blew on it to make sure it wasn’t too hot and started in on the ‘event’ of feeding her children.
~
Her babies were having a bad day, which meant she was also. Nothing seemed to settle them down, reading, cartoons, soothing music—their favorite, “Clair De Lune” by Debussy. However, no matter what she had tried to get them to take a nap, it was a no go. So, Danica loaded everything into her Escalade (diaper bags, a few toys, snacks, stroller), put the twins in their car seats, and went for a drive, taking the long way into town, thinking that would surely work.
It didn’t. It had become a fuss-fest of tears. She even wanted to cry.
Pushing them in their double stroller around the park was going to be her next attempt at calming Aaron and Ari down, and she prayed they would nod off to dreamland.
Now they were parked, the babies still upset. After telling them to give her a minute, Danica clambered out, went to the back, the power liftgate a blessing, and started fighting with the stroller, trying to get it out of her vehicle. One of the wheels had somehow become entangled into the strap of the backpack full of clean baby clothes she carried in case of disasters, which had happened. Another thing learned the hard way after changing both of them out of the mess of dirty diapers that oozed nasty out of the legs. It was like she needed a biohazard suit; it had been that bad. But she washed them up as best she could in the restroom sink at the Food Barn, and put a fresh change of clothing on them—two new outfits she’d purchased for them that day or else they would have been in nothing but diapers. Of course, that then meant she had to disinfect everything not only before but after the sink bath. So,
besides the extra clothes and baby wipes, Lysol wipes were another of the many items Danica always carried. Oh, and hand sanitizer!
Irritated, she couldn’t get the wheel untangled, she grumbled—the twins screaming at the tops of their lungs. After two more yanks, she stopped, turned around, slumped her backside down, resting precariously upon the carpeted area, and put her head into her hands.
Danica and Marcus had tried for years to have children. It never happened. He suggested fertility treatments when she was twenty-eight, something she didn’t want to do after witnessing all the expense and disappointment J.J. had gone through when those treatments didn’t take. So, when she had hit the big three-oh, she gave up on the thought of being a mother and asked God to help her accept it. Eventually, she did, busying herself with multiple committees around town and at church. She would have gone to work, maybe putting her Fine Arts degree to good use and teach dance, perhaps open up her own studio. However, Marcus didn’t want her to work, and she tried to make him happy, so she was a stay at home wife.
When they found out she was finally pregnant, her surprised joy had been overshadowed by Marcus’ concern.
“You’re over thirty-five,” he’d said, deep lines overtaking his brow.
“Are you saying I’m too old?”
“At your age, it will be considered a high-risk pregnancy, Danica.”
The thing was, she hadn’t had a single issue. Everything went smoothly from the beginning to the end. It wasn’t until those first few weeks after the birth of her twins, when she was home alone, she couldn’t help but wonder if she was in over her head. Though if she was, Danica could do nothing but tread water. And she had done a whole lot of treading.
“Yah-ma, ma!” Ari screamed in harmony with Aaron’s, “Gaaa!”
On days like that one, Danica considered maybe she had been too old.
I’m sorry, Heavenly Father. I shouldn’t be having a pity party. I know you knew what you were doing when you gave me the gift of twins. I just need a miracle today.
~
Gage was on his way back to the station when he saw Danica’s vehicle under one of the large trees that dotted the edge of the park, doing something at the back of it. Well, maybe struggling with something was more like it as the top half of her seemed to be inside, her backside out, wiggling. It was a nice view, especially since she was wearing what appeared to be yoga pants (got to love those), then she stomped her sneakered foot and started wiggling again.
What is she doing, fighting a bear?
He slowed, and when she turned around, not wearing a stitch of makeup and uncombed hair in a knot of a twist, multiple tendrils loose, but not in a deliberately messy way, more like she’d been in a catfight, he had no doubt something was wrong. While she was just as stunning without all that stuff she wore, it was out of character. She usually looked as if she just walked off the pages of a fashion magazine—poised and polished.
Not today.
No, she appeared to be on the verge of an earnest cry. Then she sat down and dropped her face into her hands. He didn’t need to think about it, Gage pulled over, hurried out of his SUV, and went to her, listening to her twins cry as if the world were ending.
“Danny?”
She peeked up at him, her soft, “Gawonii,” doing something to his chest.
“What’s wrong?”
“What isn’t.”
“Are the babies sick?” He stepped up and looked inside, seeing the back of their heads, the two of them secured in their car seats.
“No. They’re mad, and I can’t do anything right today. No matter what I’ve tried, they won’t settle down. Taking them for a walk in the stroller was going to be my next strategy, but I can’t get the wheel untangled from the strap of my backpack.”
Tears started streaming down her cheeks in silvery lines.
“Danny.” His heart hurt as he swiped the glistening moisture away with his thumbs. “Don’t cry. I’ll fix it.”
She took him in, her gaze going from his head to his feet. “Shouldn’t you be at work or something?”
While he shouldn’t enjoy the appreciation he saw in her expression, he did. “I’m at work, just getting back from a late lunch. I spotted you here and thought I could help.”
“Oh.”
“Come on. Get up, and I’ll take care of the stroller for you.” He gave her a hand which she took, and he tried to ignore the zap of sensation at her touch. “Go see if you can quiet the twins some,” he said, then grabbed the stroller, working at the tangle of the wheel and strap, freeing it rather quickly, then tugged it out, doing what needed to be done to get it unfolded and assembled into the rolling position.
“You got it!” Her voice had some life to it as she held a squirming and teary Ari.
“Give her to me and get Aaron,” he said, taking the little blonde girl from her.
A wet palm came to his cheek, and blue eyes, just like Danica’s, looked up at him with glistening tears on her lashes. She locked her gaze on him as if he were the most interesting thing ever.
“Hi there, cutie.” Ariana’s little bow lips turned into a smile. “You sure do take after your mommy.”
She cooed and rocked her small body in his arms, legs kicking.
When Danica came back, her own beautiful lips were parted as she stared at him.
“What?”
“How did you do that?”
His brow creased. “Do what?”
“She’s giggling.”
He shrugged and looked down into the angelic face. “You just think I’m pretty darn awesome, don’t you?”
When Gage gave Ari a little bounce, she squealed, but unlike the banshee he’d heard when he first arrived, it was one of pure delight.
“Wow.” Danny put Aaron into one of the stroller seats. “You are a miracle worker.”
“Naw.”
“No. Seriously. I had just asked God for a miracle, and here you are.”
Gage frowned. “I’m not a miracle.”
“So, you think He didn’t send you to my rescue?”
“No.”
It was Danica’s turn to frown. “Why not?”
“God and I haven’t seen eye to eye for quite some time, Danny. So I’m positive he didn’t, or wouldn’t, send me.” Especially to you, a woman I shouldn’t crave.
“That’s why you don’t come to church anymore? You're mad at God for something?”
Not just something. A lot of things. “Let’s not talk about it, okay?”
She studied him, saying nothing for a long moment then nodded. “All right. If that’s what you want.”
“It is.” Taking her daughter over, he placed the little one in the other stroller seat, then tapped Aaron on his red-from-crying nose. “Hey there, buddy. I think the whole neighborhood heard you were having a bad day.”
Her son smiled, and Danica punched Gage in the bicep. Not hard, a tap really, but he complained with, “Ouch,” anyway. “Don’t you know assaulting an officer of the law is a Class D Felony?”
She rolled her beautiful blue eyes, making the corners of his mouth twitch. “I’ve been trying everything, and you get the babies to smile, coo, and giggle for you.”
“I’m just something more interesting to look at than the back of your Cadillac seats,” he teased. “Give me the stroller, and I’ll take them for a lap around the park.”
“You don’t need to do that.” Danny shook her head. “I’m sure you have better things to do, like arrest someone or something.”
Gage chuckled. “Luckily, arresting people around here doesn’t happen too often. So, no, I don’t have anything pressing I need to do at the moment,” he fibbed, and off they went, him pushing Danica’s twins, her at his side, the afternoon breeze rustling the leaves and blowing the scatter of yellow on the ground across their path.
Halfway down the long stretch of sidewalk, all was quiet, and Danica whispered, “Thank you for this.”
He stopped their progress and glanced at her,
a thousand thoughts on his mind, the first and foremost, Does Marcus make you happy? Followed by, Is he good to you? “Danica, does—” Gage paused, fought himself, kept his hands white-knuckled on the stroller bar, then smiled. “You’re welcome.”
They started their journey once more, then slowed when they came to the white, wrought iron bench on the outer edge by the swings and sandbox. “You want to take a breather?” He only asked because Danny seemed tired in a way that concerned him.
“Sure.” Without saying anything else, she started in that direction as memories rolled over him.
Chapter Ten
Before
The muscles in his legs were ‘loving’ him today as they protested half-way through his run. It might have been the first of October, but cool it was not. No, the sun beating down on Gage’s back wasn’t doing him any favors either.
As he passed the baseball diamond, the burning claws of exertion dug in, but he pushed past it and kept on going. Football practice during the week and weight training put him through the paces, so he probably didn’t need to jog, but Mase insisted they did. Although he was solo, which meant he could have stayed home and maybe taken a hot tub since last night’s game bashed him up some. However, he didn’t do the lazy thing.
“You boys need to give your bodies some downtime,” his father had said on many different occasions. “Rest is important too. Essential for repair.”
“That’s what Sunday’s are for, Doctor Harrison,” Mase would say.
Though his best friend usually joined him on this three-mile jaunt around town, he’d passed up their mutual torture that week since Breck had a rare Saturday afternoon off from work at the book store.
Flying down the street, he was finally in ‘the zone,’ and nothing would stop him. Or so he thought until he saw her.
Curled up on one of the benches in the park, sitting sideways, a book in her hand she wasn’t reading, Danny appeared to be far away in thought.
Slowing, he jogged up, took a moment to catch his breath, and then, using his t-shirt, lifted the hem of it and wiped the sweat from his face.