Thankful for the darkness inside the cell, I quietly pushed the food through the slot. The men could use it. Karl’s disappearance confirmed what I’d known all along. You needed your things to return to present day unless the item was completely destroyed. The lighter was tucked away in my boot. I still had the knife hidden inside the barn. Unless somebody had burned my cape, I needed it to go home. The one I’d lost at the inn.
I had to find it.
Shouting, mumbling and staggering men filled the great hall. Some had passed out where they sat. Some had managed to drag themselves into a corner. Greasy platters, spilled cups, half-eaten roasts, gnawed bones, dried-up bread and assorted fruits nobody mustered to finish littered the tables.
I neither saw Werner and Lady Clara nor Hans and his wife or the minstrel. The few remaining men still sitting upright hammered their fists, sang or told stories, their voices unrecognizable slurs. The stench of stale food, alcohol and unwashed bodies was overpowering.
Bero lay curled up on a bench and was fast asleep. I looked for Juliana. She was probably making out with Enders. My stomach cramped angrily. I snatched a half-empty flagon from the table and gulped down its content. The beer tasted bitter. Just as well.
Feeling the urge for fresh air, I ambled back outside. I really wanted to get drunk now, but the prospect of a hangover the next day without decent water wasn’t appealing. I’d better think about how to get home. Nobody would miss me anyway.
Karl had gone home. Lady Clara and Werner were a happy couple. Bero had a girlfriend. Enders and Juliana were… Shit. I’d better get some wine or I’d never sleep.
“Max?” Juliana stepped from the shadow of the barn entrance.
What did she want now? Did she enjoy twisting the knife in my gut?
“Oh, hi.”
“Did you amuse yourself tonight?”
“Sure.”
“You seemed sad and I wanted… I—”
I turned to face her. With most torches long extinguished it was hard to make out her expression.
“Look, I get it. I left and it’s over. Better go back to Enders.” I walked off. In my confusion and anger I headed toward the portcullis into the outer bailey.
“Wait.” Juliana’s voice sounded small as she hurried after me.
“What for?”
“I am sorry for getting on with Enders,” Juliana said. She sounded breathless as she caught up to me. “What was I supposed to do? I assumed you had left forever.”
“I told you, it’s fine.” The fool in me grew bigger.
“Don’t be angry.” Her hand was warm on my forearm. It positively burned a hole that reached right into my heart.
I cleared my throat, trying desperately to ignore the fingers on my skin. I was sure losing it for feeling this way over a stupid hand. “Ehem, I’m not…angry.”
“But you are.” The fingers started to move toward my elbow, then back down to my wrist. Get a grip.
I asked myself later how things had happened. I couldn’t remember. All I knew was that Juliana pressed against me, her chest heaving and pushing at my ribs, our lips meeting in silent heat. I explored her mouth with my tongue. We stood unmoving for several minutes.
“What about Enders?” I finally managed. I was out of breath as if I’d sprinted uphill. I looked toward the portcullis, but it was quiet except for fall leaves rustling and a faint cough from a window high above me. It was very dark, the blanket of clouds unable to provide more than deep shadows.
“He is drunk—passed out in the barn.”
Now or never. I took Juliana by the hand and led her deeper into the bailey, away from cows and wandering men in need of a piss.
We stopped near the herb garden, my arms finding her again. When she pulled me into the grass, I didn’t complain. I was on fire despite the cool breeze. Every cell that made contact with her screamed and the rest wasn’t far behind. In fact my entire body had turned into an electrical current with one humongous hot spot.
Her fingers wandered along my shirt and caressed my stomach. I followed suit and found her breasts. It was great not to deal with bra clasps and other twenty-first-century contraptions. She whimpered and kept exploring, first my back and then lower. And lower. I moaned in response.
“You sure—”
“Shh.” Juliana’s hand found her target. By the way she moved she’d done this before. I pushed her away and pulled up her linen shift. She was quicker and wiggled on top. The world stopped. She moved above me, her hips against my pelvis, the sensation so intense I wanted to burst.
I had to distract myself. No way I’d last more than a minute. More like seconds. The harder she pushed, the slower I became. Not yet. When she cried out, my insides went into meltdown.
As I returned to earth, I realized I was shivering. The ripe smells from the barnyard drifted across. My butt was wet with dew.
Juliana straightened her dress. “I must go.”
“Please don’t. Stay with me.” I wanted to kiss and hold her.
“I am sorry.” Juliana hurried off into the darkness.
I got to my feet and strolled toward the barn, my body a mixture of satisfaction and exhaustion. I’d just been laid for the first time. My smile faded.
Something was missing, something I couldn’t quite put my finger on. Nothing moved as I crawled into my old spot in the straw of the barn. What in the heck had just happened? How was I supposed to sleep now?
Then I passed out.
Chapter 18
When I woke the next morning, the memories from last night went straight to my stomach as if I’d swallowed a cloud of moths. Shreds of scenes of our lovemaking sent my blood pumping all over again: Juliana moaning below me, her pale skin in the low light. I’d finally done it.
I whistled as I clambered into the great hall in search of breakfast. With that many guests they surely put on some kind of spread. Bero sat propping his chin with his hand, listlessly chewing a piece of bread.
I poked him in the shoulder. “Good morning.”
“Who says it is good,” Bero groaned.
“The sun is out and I slept great. You should lay off the booze once in a while.”
“Booze?”
“Yeah, the wine.”
Bero peered sideways, his eyes narrowed. “What happened?”
I shrugged. “I’m hungry.”
“Something happened last night. Did you finally bed a maiden? Who was it?”
I pretended not to hear and fished an apple from the newly arranged clean table. Around us, knights and soldiers assembled for another meal. Most of them looked like Bero, pale with bloodshot eyes. Despite my best efforts my cheeks grew hot.
“Aha,” Bero hollered. How did he know? Still, the grin stubbornly remained on my face. “Who is it? Tell me.”
I tried concentrating on the apple. It tasted crisp and sour. “You’re still drunk,” I said out loud.
“Nah, not that drunk,” Bero hiccupped. “I need to piss. When I get back, you better tell me.”
It was best if I left before Bero returned. Find Juliana and a dark corner. I shivered as I imagined kissing her. She’d felt so soft and good. I wanted to see in the daylight, all of her. She’d smelled of lavender. Just like Lady Clara. Or was it roses. I chuckled.
“What is so amusing this early morn?” Lord Werner watched me from across the table.
“Good morning,” I said, attempting to bow from my seat.
“You are cheerful, Max Nerds. I take it you enjoyed the feast. Well, today is another special celebration. One of our best squires will be knighted.”
My mind snapped to attention. “Enders?”
Werner nodded. “A good man.”
Just then, the man in question looking wide-awake appeared next to Werner. I turned red all over again as I busied myself with a hunk of bread.
“My Lord, may I have a word,” Enders said. “It is about the wedding.”
Werner placed an arm around his squire. As they walked off speaking qui
etly, I sat staring after them. If I’d been confused about my emotions before, now I was completely baffled.
I was in love and yet… Hadn’t I just had the most amazing sex in my life? Okay, I had nothing to compare it to. But it had been amazing, mindboggling, melt-your-bones kind of sex. Hadn’t Juliana come to me?
How could she get married? Maybe she hadn’t told Enders yet. Or… I shook my head as the realization that she’d get married just the same hit me.
Throwing down my bread, I glanced around the room in search of her. I had to know.
Right now.
I ignored Bero wandering in my direction, undoubtedly demanding an explanation of which girl I’d slept with. I raced past him looking the other way and headed upstairs.
“Juliana?” I yelled as I pounded on the door of Lady Clara’s reception room. When I heard nothing, I entered. Just then the bedroom door swung open and Lady Clara appeared in a cream-colored dress of linen, trimmed with lace. Even with her hair in a simple braid she looked like a goddess.
She only seemed mildly surprised. I envied her composure.
“Max Nerds, you are troubled. What is the matter?”
I bowed a quick one. “Sorry, I’m trying to find Juliana.”
“She is in the kitchen. Discussing the meal for her festivity. Is something wrong?”
“Her wedding,” I said, my voice strangled.
Lady Clara’s cornflower eyes were on me. “I thought you knew. Surely, she told you about her betrothal to Enders.”
I nodded and then shook my head. “I figured…” Suddenly the embarrassment of my miserable love was too much. I turned and raced downstairs. I didn’t slow until I saw the outer gate.
All over the bailey cattle grazed. I noticed a line of archers along the walls. Was Werner expecting an attack? He had retrieved his cattle, but it was clear they couldn’t stay long. The grass already looked trampled and was thin in places. In a few more days, the bailey would be bare dirt.
I balled my fists, nails digging in my palms. Last night I’d been making love out here for the first time. I’d been the happiest man alive. Today, all was forgotten and covered by cow dung for good measure.
I strolled toward a low wall near the herb garden and sat down. The wind was blowing this morning, shoving rain-heavy clouds across the sky. I thought of Luanda and her knowledge of poisons. I could simply put something in Enders drink.
I shuddered. That’s what murderers did. However mad I was with Enders, it wasn’t his fault that Juliana was messing with two guys. I tried reasoning with myself. Even if she’d break up with Enders, where would it leave us? Like Karl I had to… wanted to go home.
I wondered how Karl was doing, if he was in a hospital, being brought back to life. Of course, that was in the past because when I’d met Karl for the first time, he’d been home for a while. Still, the game had destroyed his life, his health, career and family.
At that moment I realized I had to stop Stuler for good. Destroy his game so that people couldn’t get killed. No matter how fascinating time-travel was, no matter how much I’d learned, it was a miracle I was still alive.
You aren’t home yet. Not even close. You don’t have your clothes. Sweat trickled under my arms. I could still die.
A face with frowning green eyes and red hair appeared in my vision. Emma shaking her head at me as if she were scolding me for my morbid thoughts.
Wait a minute. How could I pine over Juliana and think about another girl? What was wrong with me?
I straightened. No matter how I wanted to go tell Emma to mind her own business and interrogate Jimmy’s father after I smacked him in his arrogant nose, I had to finish this game.
“Max,” Bero shouted from the portcullis. “Don’t move.”
Despite myself I grinned. Those were the words Bero had used when he’d found me in the herb garden ages ago. Before I’d died almost twice. Before Juliana…
“What is a lad to do with a friend who acts like a dimwit most of the time?” Bero slumped onto the wall. I tried to recapture my smile, but seeing Bero brought back nasty reminders of reality. Strangely, Bero didn’t say anything else, only threw an occasional glance at me.
After a while, he got back up. “So you want to come along?”
“Where?”
“Watch the knighting…and another feast. Everyone will attend.” He rubbed his middle.
I shook my head. To my relief Bero hadn’t mentioned the wedding.
“What are you going to do?” Bero finally said.
“I’ve got to go home,” I whispered. “For that I need my cape and I have no idea who has it.”
“You left it at the inn.”
I nodded. “You got any coin?”
“Schwarzburg took it, remember? Ask the Lord.”
I shook my head again. I didn’t want to draw any attention to myself. Werner wouldn’t understand that I didn’t care to watch the knighting of Enders. I was still Werner’s squire and not attending was an act of mutiny.
Without another word I got up and headed for the outer gate. I had to leave Hanstein before I changed my mind. Before I ran into Juliana and made a sniveling fool of myself.
“What am I going to tell the Lord?” Bero called after me.
I just shrugged and continued, nodding at the four guards who stood silently observing the path beyond. Four more stood above them on the wall.
I stumbled downhill. A mixture of roasting meat and chimney smoke hit my nose, the inn. Though the path was empty a prickling sensation traveled down my neck. I should hurry before Schwarzburg found me. This time they wouldn’t wait. This time they’d cut off my head. I shuddered while scanning the tree line—majestic oaks turned a thousand colors of yellow, orange and red. Like fire they shone in the sun. The clouds from earlier were gone.
Juliana had picked a beautiful day to get married. Crap.
I imagined blackened faces among the trees. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to stroll through Bornhagen in broad daylight. I considered turning around but dismissed it. Over my dead body would I watch the happy couple. Sore loser.
Ahead, the patio of the inn came into view. Not a single horse was tethered in front. With that little traffic I’d immediately draw attention. My confidence fizzled. I couldn’t just ask the barkeep. If there were any of Schwarzburg’s men within five miles, the innkeeper would alert them.
I hurried past, the sense of isolation and loneliness making me stumble. Again the hair on my neck rose. Schwarzburg’s spies surely did surveillance. I kept going. Bero’s old hut came into view. On a whim I stopped.
Bero’s younger sister Adela and their mother were likely in the field. Still, I pounded on the door, wrinkling my nose and fighting back old memories. The stench was hard to take. A few chickens clucked in the dust.
I almost jumped as the door swung open. Even in the gloom, I could tell Adela had been crying.
“Max,” she choked. After a quick glance up and down the path, she pulled me inside.
“What’s going on?” I asked. Her brown eyes so like Juliana’s stung.
“Mother is dying.” She nodded toward a straw sack near the fire pit. In a matter of weeks, Bero’s mother had turned from a muscular woman into a shriveled skeleton. Her eyes were closed and she didn’t move.
“Schwarzburg’s men broke her arm so she couldn’t work anymore.”
“Why didn’t you get help?” I said, taking in the mother’s right hand which was puffy and sickeningly twisted.
Adela started to sob. “I did not know where to go. I went to the castle to find you or Bero. But you were gone. And the Lord was, too. They refused to let me speak with Juliana.”
“What about Luanda?”
“She was away. I went twice.”
I rubbed my forehead in frustration. Adela’s mother would’ve been just fine in modern day. We’d have taken her to the hospital where they’d put a cast on her wrist.
I wanted to ask why Adela hadn’t left a message for Luanda.
Of course she couldn’t write. I took another look at the crumpled woman, thinking about my own mother who had to be of similar age. Her kind eyes and smile zoomed into my mind. Pain crept across my chest as if someone were squeezing my heart. I couldn’t think about her now.
I knelt next to the bed. This is what death looked like. Even Karl hadn’t been gone this far. I had nothing to offer. I couldn’t heal bones or even reset the break. It had been weeks and the bone was growing together all wrong. By the looks of her parchment skin and sunken cheeks, it was her least problem.
The room was even barer than last time, the table leaning against the wall, one leg propped up with a rock, a single bench in front of it. Terrible guilt bubbled up inside me. I sucked in air and closed my eyes. I’d been the one leading Schwarzburg’s troops here when I first arrived in the game. While I hid on the roof, they’d killed Bero’s mother. It just had taken longer.
“Bero and I returned from Heiligenstadt yesterday,” I said with a hoarse voice. “We sat in prison for weeks. Schwarzburg wanted to burn us at the stake. Lord Werner arrived barely in time.”
A low wheeze emanated from the floor. Adela’s mother sounded like a wounded animal.
“She has not eaten in a week. I even made the pine tea you taught us,” Adela whispered. She kneeled next to me, attempting to spoon a few drops into her mother’s mouth. The woman’s lips didn’t move. “I am pleased you are safe. Is Bero…?”
“He’s fine. So is Juliana.” I straightened. “What are you going to do?”
Adela set aside the mug and slumped on the bench. “I do not know,” she cried. “Lord Ott came by. He says we still owe him and Lady Miranda because of Juliana. He says I must work for him. He scares me.”
She bent forward and began to cry in earnest. Not the loud wailing or theatrical bawling I knew from some of the girls in my class. Rather a quiet sobbing filled with utter hopelessness.
“You can’t go to him. He’ll rape you.” Wonderful how cheery I was.
“What else can I do?” Adela straightened and wiped her face. She was shorter than Juliana and more fragile. Ott and Miranda would finish her off in no time.
“I’ll stay with you if you want. Until…” I looked back at the shrunken body in the straw. When I said it out loud, I knew it was the right thing to do. I owed her that.
At Witches' End Page 14