by Christina OW
“I’d rather be numb than feel like a raw nerve,” she mumbled.
“You can blame that on your hormones.” Jolie smirked at the bad joke. “How are things at home?”
Jolie sighed. “My mom has taken over everything, including running my life. Apparently, keeping busy leaves no time for depression—as per her experience.”
“And how is Miles taking his new living arrangements? It must be very confusing?”
Confusing? She wished! “He blames me for his father moving away. He doesn’t understand why I drove his daddy away, why he won’t come into the house when he comes to see Miles or pick him up. Why he asks Miles how Mommy and baby are instead of asking me himself. He’s even more confused by his two new uncles and grandparents. He wants to know why he didn’t know them before.”
“And what did you tell him?”
“That they tried to beat him out of me and were therefore cut off from my life.” Jolie sighed at her raised brow. “I’m joking. James and father dearest don’t care to visit, but he knows they exist thanks to my mother. Jake however tries his best to be friendly. I bet his wife is forcing him because she wants their son JJ, to know his cousin, which means James will be trying to make nice soon because he does everything Jake tells him. And Jase, he’s doing his best to help Miles out.”
“Why Jase and not you?”
She laughed bitterly. “That would be a case of the blind leading the blind don’t you think? I’m confused, broken, and going off the deep end. I shouldn’t be taking care of anyone.” She pressed the heels of her palms against her eyes. “My life has turned into shit!”
“What about Mac?”
Her heart leaped like it used to over five years ago. What did that mean? How was she supposed to interpret that?
“What about him?” she echoed.
“Has he tried to speak to you? Did you ask him what I asked you to?”
She lowered her hands, crossing them over her chest defensively. “I’m not ready for couples’ therapy.”
She leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. “Jolie, we’ve talked about your life, discussed it extensively. You have a number of issues all revolving around rejection. Clearly the rejection from your father and two brothers doesn’t matter as much as Mac’s. You won’t invite Mac or your family to discuss this, how exactly do you want me to help you get to the bottom of it all? Truthfully, I believe you wouldn’t have reacted so explosively that day if you had a strong, loving and supportive family. Because of what you didn’t have, you built a life around Mac and he was the last person you believed would betray you.”
Jolie sighed again. She had a point there. Ever since the beginning she’d wished her family loved her. When she finally realized they would never give her what she needed, she went across the street and adopted Mac’s family. For the longest time she’d been looking forward to being a part of the Masters, to feel like she deserved the love they showered on her. Their deaths stole more from her than it did Mac. They stole her hopes and dreams, crumbled her fairytale life to dust, robbed her of the love and care she’d craved most of her life. She hadn’t just lost parents-in-laws that day she’d lost her parents, her family and was condemned to a bunch of people who probably wished she never existed.
She looked up at Dr. Patel. “What are you doing this weekend?”
* * * *
Jolie stood hidden by Miles’ door and listened to him laugh as he played with Jase. It was the first time he’d laughed so hard since Mac left. She felt his joy right in her chest. It was relieving, like she had a chance to be absolved of the mistakes she made, for ripping his home, his family apart.
But I’m going to fix it, for Miles. Today was the day to start new.
She stepped into view. “Hey, kiddo, ready to go to Daddy’s place?”
The laughter stopped and Miles’ face dropped. He jumped off Jase’s lap and dragged his feet with hunched shoulders to his closet. He pulled out his backpack and it dropped with a dull thud on the floor. Then he dragged it behind him as he walked to her, his head hanging low.
Jolie sighed, grabbing hold of the back of his T-shirt as he passed her and pulled him back as she walked to his bed. She sat down and pulled him onto her lap.
“You want to talk about what’s bothering you?”
“When is Daddy coming home?” he mumbled.
Jolie hugged him, resting her chin on his shoulder. The first time he’d asked her that, she said never. Then Dr. Patel’s magic began to take root in her mind and the next time he asked her, she said she didn’t know. And now, what was she going to say?
“Soon, Baby. Mommy just has to fix a few things.”
He turned to her, his eyes sparkling at her for the first time since the whole mess began. “Promise.”
She held out her little finger. “Pinky swear.”
His face lit up with his grin as he looped his little finger with hers. “Pinky swear! Thanks, Mama. I want us to be a family before the new baby comes,” he declared, pressing his free hand on her growing belly.
Jolie placed her hand over his. “Well then, we better get to work on fixing this family, huh?”
He nodded vigorously. “I’ll tell Daddy to do his part. I’ve got to go now.” He jumped off her lap and took off out the door.
“Tell him to come in. I need to speak with him. Miles?” she called after him.
“Okay, Mama,” he yelled back.
Jase placed his hand over hers that still rested on her belly. “You made him really happy, Jolie.”
She nodded, turning to face her twin. “I hope it works out because Mac and I have disappointed him enough.”
“He does have a point. You guys need to get your ducks in a row before this little one comes along.”
“I know...but I’m scared,” her voice cracked.
Jase wrapped his arm around her. Since the transplant, he’d recovered well and soon he’d be his old self body-wise and she was grateful. Mostly because it brought them closer together with their mother. She was different without their father lording over her. And they liked that difference, in fact, Jolie wasn’t looking forward to giving her back to her father.
“Jolie, I had a failing liver and if I can come back with that all right and with a stronger relationship with Mom after she stood up to Dad to save my life, you and Mac can solve your problems. The truth, I have no idea why you blew up on him like that.”
Jolie groaned. Of course her brother knew about her crazy episode. She was lucky no one recorded it and uploaded it on the internet. “My shrink says my reaction was amplified by my family’s rejection.”
“Hey!”
She laughed kissing his cheek. “Not you, of course. I have never doubted your love for me, but the rest...sometimes it felt like they wished I was never born.”
“They weren’t like that all the time. They were good brothers until...well...”
“The day they did nothing as Dad beat me?”
“Yeah, then. So why did you call this family reunion?”
“Because I need to know why they hate me.” Jolie tightened her hold on her brother’s hand. “That scares me too. I don’t think I’m ready to find out what I ruined by being born.”
He pressed his forehead against hers. “Either way, you have the people who truly love you in your corner. Hold on to that. I think you should ask Mac to stay.”
She shook her head. “That would be too embarrassing.”
With a coy smile he said, “But he can break a few heads if you need him to.”
She chuckled at the memory of Mac pinning her father to the wall. “That was funny to watch.” She stood up, pulling her brother up. “Let’s go face the truth.”
“I need to ask, how did you explain the baby being inside your belly to Miles?” he asked with a cheeky smile.
She chuckled. “I told him to ask his daddy. You’ll have to ask Mac how he made it through that mine field.”
They’d barely gotten halfway down the stairs before t
hey heard the yelling coming from the living room. Jase turned to her with a worried look, probably wondering if the shouting would set Jolie off. That’s what she’d become, someone that needed a warning label—‘beware, will explode when triggered’. Jolie lifted her chin and pushed her shoulders back. It was time to show them she was saner than any of them.
“That’s my girl. Go show them who’s boss,” Jase cheered with a beaming smile.
It gave her more courage to know that someone always had her back. If she had leaned on him from the start, that thread that tethered her would have held in the face of Mac’s betrayal. She wasn’t super human. She needed support even if it hurt her pride.
She marched into the living room, her hands resting on her belly because she had no idea what to do with them and stood watching the screaming match between the men in her family and her husband while her mother and son stood to the side watching with wide frightened eyes. With them were three other ladies. Leah, the beautiful redhead, Jase’s girlfriend, she knew and was close to. One of the other two looked like she’d walked out of a society magazine and the other looked more down to earth as she held a little boy to her chest. The boy she recognized from the pictures her mother had sent, but the ladies, though she could guess who they were, she’d had no good pictures of them to recognize.
“I’m not sure how you run things in your homes, but in mine, guests don’t engage in a shouting match with their hosts,” she spoke directly, her voice loud enough not to be a shout. The room went quiet and they all turned to face her. Jolie smiled at the room, looking each one of the men in the eye. Her confidence almost faltered when Mac quickly looked away, giving her his back.
“Good, I like silence. It’s calming. Now, why don’t we all take a seat—after proper introductions have been made, of course.”
The room stayed quiet as everyone stared at her like she’d grown two heads.
Jase chuckled behind her before stepping forward. “Why don’t I start? Hi, my name is Jase Simmons and I’m a recovering transplant patient and a college graduate.” He signaled to Leah who moved to stand by his side. “This beauty here is my girlfriend Leah O’Connor. She’s a graduate too; aspiring to be an architect like me. She took great care of me and Mom while we were recovering and I love her for that. Leah, say hi to this dysfunctional clan you’ll be joining sometime in the future.”
Leah’s cheeks were close to the red of her hair as she gave the room a short wave with a shy, “Hi”
Jolie bit her lips shut to keep from laughing. God, they were such a dysfunctional family.
Jake cleared his voice, gaining attention of the room before he stretched his hand out to his wife. She took it and stood by his side, shifting the boy to her hip.
“I’m Jake Simmons, I own a construction company in Nevada. And this is my wife Katie. We’ve been married for three years and have a son,” he chucked the boy’s chin provoking a giggle from him, “JJ—Jake Junior. And this is officially the first family gathering we’ve attended.”
And with a cocky smile on his face, James stepped forward with his fiancé’s hand in his, “I’m James Simmons, paralegal and soon to be a successful lawyer. This is my fiancé Amy Deschanel, daughter of the owner of the best law firm in Washington DC. We will be married in three months.”
Jolie looked Amy over. She looked a little embarrassed and peeved. It was sad she was going to move from ‘daughter of’ to ‘wife of’, never to be known for just being herself. And to think that was the life she had wanted with Mac. She turned to her husband, wondering if that was who she was for the past five years.
No. I’ve been Jolie Masters, mother of Miles Masters. He never gave me a chance to be a ‘wife of’.
“And I guess our wedding invitations got lost in the mail?” Jake snickered.
Now Amy’s cheeks resembled Leah’s hair as she glared at her fiancé. James was going to pay for that in some way.
“I’m John Simmons. Father to these three ingrates and husband to that traitor, Ana Simmons!” her father’s voice boomed as he pointed at her mother, and Miles visibly flinch.
Jolie moved to stand next to Mac, who was visibly surprised by that and beckoned Miles. He ran across the room and right into his father’s waiting arms. Pressing his head to Mac’s, his arms tightly wound around his neck, Miles looked around the room with big eyes. She couldn’t blame him for being scared. She stroked his cheek and gave him a reassuring smile before she turned to the rest.
“As much as you deny it Dad, I’m your kid too, but that’s a topic for later on. I’m Jolie Masters, formally Simmons and that’s a heart break for another time.” She placed her hand on Mac’s arm. “This is my husband of five years Mackenzie Masters. He’s an aeronautic engineer, and even though he also flies for the Air Force he has this thing for helicopters. He can build one from scratch and that’s what he currently does for Uncle Sam.” She moved her hand to Miles’ who wrapped his fingers around hers. “This is our son Miles, named after his grandfather. The best man I’ve ever known.” She caressed her belly tenderly with her free hand. “This little Masters doesn’t have a name yet, but she is my turning point.”
“Why are we here?” her father barked—that’s all he seemed to do most of her life and the years hadn’t changed him.
The doorbell rang and Jolie lifted her finger before she walked to answer it. Dr. Patel had finally arrived and she looked ready to take on the crazies.
“Are you ready?” she asked as she stepped in.
Jolie closed the door and faced her. “There are a lot more people here than I anticipated. I’m actually shocked to see the ones I did invite let alone that they brought their other halves along. Stranger things have happened.”
Dr. Patel smiled patiently at her. “Don’t worry, everything will be okay.”
Jolie didn’t want to dispute her so she just led the way back to the living room. Everyone had taken a seat, leaving one single chair and space on the love seat next to Mac. Miles and JJ weren’t in the room though.
“They are watching cartoons in the TV room,” her mother answered her silent question.
Jolie nodded her appreciation before she made final introductions. “Everyone, this is Dr. Patel. She’s my psychiatrist and she’s going to help me get through some stuff with all your help.”
Mac blanched while everyone else looked around confused.
“Yeah this isn’t a barbecue but a family counseling session,” she added and immediately her father shot to his feet. She moved in his path intercepting him and that brought Mac up on his feet. She appreciated that because she wasn’t so sure her father wouldn’t hit her to get her out of his way. “I just want to find out why you hate me so much. Once I get that answer, I promise you’ll never see me again if you don’t want to.”
His hands clenched into fists as he glared down at her and Jolie unconsciously took a step back. It brought too many bad memories of another time when she was pregnant and his fists clenched in the same way but were swinging.
Jase was immediately by her side, placing himself between them. “This time Mac’s here to break your neck and I’ll help,” he whispered harshly.
“What does that mean?” Mac demanded.
This wasn’t what she wanted, or needed. It was all going wrong.
“Please, Dad, just answer me that and I swear I’ll never bother you again.” she pleaded close to tears.
“When James was three and Jake five, I left your father,” her mother blurted out.
“Shut up, Ana!” her father barked making her jump.
She spared him a quick glance before she faced Jolie again. “I couldn’t take his controlling me anymore. His jealousy was driving us apart and one day I left. I just needed a break, just a few days to breathe. We got married so young, a year older than you. I never got a chance to find myself.”
Her father snorted. “Yeah, you found yourself in the arms of another man!”
Jolie felt her heart jump. Even though his voic
e and face showed so much rage, she could see the hurt in his eyes. It was amazing to see her father actually possessed a heart that was broken.
“We talked about this, I thought you understood! I thought you forgave me!” her mother cried.
“I never did! And this was the product of your adultery!” he bellowed sneering at Jolie.
Jolie felt the room tilt. She needed to sit down.
She felt a hard mass press against her back as large arms wrapped around her holding her up on her shaky legs.
“I’ve got you,” Mac whispered in her ear.
Jolie’s head dropped back on his chest with relief. They may not be on good terms but she really needed him to tether her to the ground. She couldn’t fall apart, not now.
“So...does this mean...I’m not his kid either?” Jase asked with a shaky voice.
Her father placed his hands on his shoulders with a wide smile. “Of course you’re my son! You look just like me, a true Simmons!”
“But the DNA results showed—”
“They made a mistake,” he cut Jase off. “You are my son, but she is no daughter of mine.”
Jolie sagged against Mac. How was it that still hurt as much as it did the first time?
“Jake, James, is this also the reason why you despise your sister?” Dr. Patel’s calm voice filled the room.
Jolie looked at her two older brothers as they stared at each other. She chuckled shaking her head. “You should have just asked Jake that question because James does whatever he does.”
James’ lips twisted in a sneer. “I have a mind of my own. That, always calling me Jake’s puppy is one of the reasons I hate you. And Dad always complained about feeding and clothing a kid that wasn’t his. All those things I never could get I would have had if he wasn’t supporting Mom’s bastard!”
Mac quickly released her and she had to hold on to him to keep him from ripping her brother’s head off. His words may have hurt but she didn’t want him dead.
“You fucking asshole, I’m going to kill you!” Mac hissed.