I opened my mouth to speak, but then I noticed his eyes landed on Ivy. He wanted her feedback, not mine.
Oh. So it’s like that. Heat blossomed under my collar.
Ivy’s eyes drifted down to her phone as her expression became thoughtful. “I think your instincts are right. She’s taking the fight to the city to ensure that you have to observe protocol while she fights dirty. She cares not about our rules and laws. She’ll do whatever she can to finish you off.” She said these words so coldly, but there was a flicker in her beautiful features. Ivy felt for Black Rock. She just didn’t want anyone to know it.
Too late, sister.
“Well, trap or no, I have to deal with it. Get Joaquin and Silver. They can go with me. If I need backup, I’ll send for it.”
“Joaquin is ready. Silver is already out on assignment. I sent him. I needed more medicine for the boy. I’m sorry. If I had known…”
“It’s no matter,” Black Rock said, opening the door. “Joaquin and I can handle it. Keep the com open, though, just in case.”
“Wait. What about us? If it’s Tara, we need to be there.”
Black Rock whirled, his face falling back into that hardass leader expression I’d grown to hate. “If Tara’s there, that’s exactly why you shouldn’t be. She wants you dead most of all. If you’re here safe, she’ll have to pivot and change plans.”
“I’m not staying here,” I said, striding forward.
Black Rock held out his hand. “I could compel you to stay, Lila, but I don’t want to.” His expression and voice softened. One large hand reached out and tenderly tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “Please, just trust me on this.”
At his touch, the passionate fire that I’d managed to douse flared back up. My eyes lingered on his lips, soft and pink. “Okay.”
He smiled, then turned and was gone.
I watched him disappear around the corner as my emotions swirled as if I were a hormonal middle school girl with her first crush. What was wrong with me?
But then Ivy shifted and I realized she was watching me.
“He has that effect on women when they first meet him,” she said, studying my face. “You aren’t the first.”
What did that mean? Had she and Black Rock been a thing once and now they weren’t. I straightened my face and shoulders. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Sure,” she said smirking. “Whatever you have to tell yourself. Just, be careful. He isn’t one for keeping promises.”
“How’s Ki?” I said, changing the subject as fast as humanly possible.
“He’s resting peacefully. He has a kind way about him. When he’s well, maybe I’ll spend some time and get to know him better.” Her green eyes flashed. She was trying to use Ki to make me jealous, but I refused to bite. Was she doing the same with Santiago? Or did she have other motives?
“Yes, Ki is kind,” I said, “and I appreciate you saving his life. I’m not ungrateful, but don’t mess with him. Or Santiago. Or any of the others, for that matter.” Then, making sure I kept eye contact and spoke with as cold a tone as Ivy herself liked to use, I said between gritted teeth, “I would give my life for them”
I’d intended my last sentence to sound as a threat and I’d succeeded, surprising even myself with the intensity of my ferocity.
After holding her gaze for a moment longer, I whirled, stalking out of the room. I had another stop to make on my nightly tour of ridiculousness.
“If you’re looking for Santiago, he’s up on the roof,” Ivy called after me. Her tone was still barbed, like she was well aware I was cutting a swath through the men in this compound, torturing them and leaving them hanging. None of which I’d intended to do. Why did everyone around me have to get hurt when all I did was try to protect them?
Without responding, I trekked down the hallway, getting lost only twice before I found the stairs to the roof. Willing my exhausted legs to work, I managed the four flights of stairs, wishing desperately for a barista coffee stop on the way. This trip was really burning the candle at both ends, but this couldn’t wait.
Stepping into the bitter cold, I clutched my arms around myself, using a little bit of magic to push heat out of my ring. It helped to cut the chill as I searched the icy platform for Santiago.
I spotted him past the glass confines, standing at the mountain ledge, a solitary form peering into the moonlit mountain tops. His windbreaker fluttered around his muscular frame, but his posture spoke volumes about his mood. Just seeing him like this cut at me more than the mountain chill. My words and actions had sent him up here, had sent him to Ivy. I should’ve thought before speaking, a problem that kept repeating itself over and over. When would I learn to shut my damn mouth?
Sensing my approach through the crunchy ice, he turned, curls wiping across his forehead. I couldn’t read his expression so I sent him a telepathic message.
Okay to talk?
He nodded, turning away from the icy drop and walking toward me. We met halfway across the rocky ledge, the heat from my ring enveloping us as the wind howled.
You okay? I asked.
I’m alive, he answered, his shoulders slumped. Ki?
I sent him an image of Ki, awake on the hospital bed, leaving out the kissing part, of course. He’s going to be fine.
Good. He shuffled from foot to foot, hands deep in his pockets with nothing more to say to me. I had erected this wall between us. I needed to tear it down.
“Santiago, I’m sorry about what I said. It wasn’t fair. You have every reason to make choices about how you use your magic. I know I hate it when Black Rock forces us to do what he wants.”
The wind seemed to carry my words away, but as his sad eyes lingered on my face, I knew he’d heard me. He sighed, his expression remaining as closed as before. It was obvious my apology wasn’t enough.
I tried again. “I lash out when I’m mad, and it’s crap. I’m stupid.”
Santiago held up a hand. “I deserved it. I’m a coward.”
“No,” I put my hand on his shoulder but could tell he didn’t want it there so I withdrew. “You are anything but a coward.”
His eyes glistened behind his glasses. “I’ve seen many die in my father’s care, Amor. I tried to make myself believe it would be different for me, but it’s clear it won’t be. All my life people have said how I take after my dad, how I’ll be a great healer one day. The possibility both excited me and frightened me. I want to be able to heal, but I’m afraid of the deaths I may cause, of carrying that responsibility with me.”
Santiago paused, then straightened his back as if drawing determination from the chilled air. “When it comes to healing, magic is uncertain. You can never be sure if it will work. But science…”
I shook my head, afraid of what he would say next.
“Science is different. Its limitations don’t come from within you, and you can work with others to make the right decision.”
“No, Santiago…” I didn’t want to hear it. If he didn’t tell me, it wouldn’t be true.
His wavering eyes finally met my gaze as the wind cut across us like blades of ice. “I’m going to join the Erudite Society.”
“No, you can’t do that.”
“It’s already decided. I’ll make sure I can never use magic to hurt anyone again.” His eyes wouldn't meet mine anymore.
“You mean…” I reached for my ear, “you will have that surgery, let them cut your magic from you? Let them… let them… ” My words failed me. I had no idea how they took the magic away, what he would give up to become this… this different Santiago. “When?”
He nodded, then added, “Ivy called a Erudite Society surgeon who can do the operation here. Tonight.”
“What?! No. You have to think about this.”
“I have,” he said in a firm tone that left no room for argument. “After that, I’ll go to France and train.”
“France? You’ll leave us?” This kept getting worse. It was a nightmare.
&
nbsp; He didn’t answer.
“What about your father? What will he think of your decision? Have you talked to him?”
His jaw tightened. “I make my own decisions,” he said, reminding me of what I’d told Black Rock.
You can’t do this, please, I said into his mind, then, in a desperate attempt to stop him, I projected images of us together. Him and I. Then the five of us flying. His whooping dive into the river before we met my aunt. Him carrying me on his back as I laughed. Us, side by side on the lighthouse railing, our heads pressed together, hands interlocked.
He touched his head, wincing as if my telepathy hurt him. “Lila.”
I stopped, heart aching. “Please, don’t do this. Don’t do something so irreversible just because you’re mad at me. I’m sorry. We need you. I need you.”
He winced again even though my words were spoken aloud. Putting his hands back in his pockets, he hunched against a biting wind I didn’t feel. “Sometimes it isn’t about you.”
Then he shouldered away from me and disappeared.
I stared at the spot where he’d been, the tears prickling at my eyes.
Sometimes it isn’t about you.
His words echoed in my head like a gong. They pounded at my temples until I clutched at my skull, willing it to be over.
This was my fault. All I did was hurt people. I was a menace. A plague.
Broken, I stumbled downstairs. Nearly blind with tears, it took me awhile to find the door to the room Mercedes and I shared. I threw it open, nearly crashing into her.
“Hey, mama. I was just about to come looking for…” She stopped, her mouth agape. “Lila, what’s going on?”
I fell into her arms, sobbing. It was all too much. Everything was too much.
She pulled me to the bed and sat, holding me as I cried. She stroked my hair as I soaked her shirt. At one point, she slipped back, reaching for the phone. At first, I thought she was calling in backup until I heard the room service order. Then she was back, holding me, brushing back my hair.
“I’ve done it. I drove him away. Everyone… It’s all a mess.”
“Listen, mama, it may seem bad now, but there’s nothing that can’t be fixed with a good cry and a big cup of coffee. The cry is taken care of and the coffee’s on the way.” She twined my hair behind my head to keep it off my sticky face.
“This can’t be fixed. I pushed Santiago away. He’s getting rid of his magic and leaving us. And Tara’s back and I kissed Black Rock.”
Mercedes leaned back. “You kissed Captain Douche?”
“General Douche, but yeah.”
“Oh, Lord.”
I pressed my face to her leg, wanting to hide there forever.
“Look, things seem bad. Really bad. But you’re a badass chick. You can fix this.”
There was a knock on our door and a waiter wheeled in a cart with a steaming carafe and a tray covered by a silver dome. The wonderful scent of coffee and some confectionery sweetness filled our room.
I sat up, staring at the mouth-watering goodness she’d ordered for us. “What would I do without you?”
Mercedes shrugged, getting up to investigate the tray. “For one you’d have to eat a whole cheesecake by yourself. As it stands, you’ll only have to eat half. Dig in.”
Chapter 15
Several hours after binging on cheesecake and falling asleep on Mercedes’s bed, I startled awake. The lamps were still on, and my friend was lying in an uncomfortable-looking position that would leave her with a crick in her neck if I didn’t help her straighten.
For the most part, Mercedes slept like a log, and she barely stirred when I nudged her into a better position and slid a pillow under her head. I needed a shower and probably a hell of a lot more rest, but I couldn’t take my mind off of what was going on with Black Rock. I know they’d told me to stay out of it, but they apparently didn’t know me very well.
I was on my way to the bathroom when a gentle knock sounded at the door. Heartbeat speeding up, I raced over and threw open the door, expecting Black Rock or Ivy, but Fang and Tom waited there instead.
“Hey,” Tom said, dark blond curls hanging into his blue eyes. Their normally sparkling luster was dulled, adding to my suspicion that they’d not slept much lately either.
“What’s going on? Is it Ki?” My tone was flooded with worry as I imagined blinking monitors, flat green lines, and nurses rushing into his room, but Fang put me at ease.
“He’s fine. Ivy’s got him. She made me leave.” Fang rubbed the back of his neck, looking as exhausted as Tom.
“I got kicked out, too,” I said. “‘It’s not good for the patient.’” My tone was mocking.
Fang snickered. “‘Fang, don’t touch the equipment. You’ll break it.’” He did a spot on Ivy, too, jutted hip and pointed, finger wagging.
Tom laughed, but added, “To be fair you did break that finger-oxygen-thingy while you were in there.”
Fang threw up his hands in dismay. “Why are there so many cords on the floor? And who makes blinking red buttons, but then doesn’t want anyone to touch them?”
Tom and I exchanged a glance as if to say we loved our accident prone, bull-in-the-china-shop friend.
“What’s going on?” A groggy Mercedes appeared behind me. “Oh, hey guys.” She straightened up and smoothed her hair back when she spotted who it was.
“Sorry to wake you,” Fang said. “We were just wondering if… ah… well…”
“What my big friend here is trying to ask is if you ladies want to go exploring with us. See, we can’t sleep and we figured you might not be able to either, but since you actually were we’ll just—”
“Give us ten minutes to get ready,” Mercedes said brightly, tugging me back into the room and attempting to close the door.
I grabbed the doorframe. “Mercedes, wait. I don’t think I should leave. What if Black Rock comes back? Or needs us? What if Ki gets worse?”
“We’ll stay inside the building, right guys?”
They nodded. I was pretty sure Fang would have consented to being hung by his thumbnails if it meant spending time with Mercedes at this point.
“But, but,” I stuttered.
“But nothing. You need a distraction and so do I. So do we all. There’s nothing you can do right now and clearly you aren’t sleeping, so let’s go.” She gave me a final tug, dislodging my fingers so I stumbled back. She shut and locked the door before I could even regain my footing.
I rubbed where she’d tugged me. “Did Ivy genetically enhance you or something?”
Mercedes’s teeth flashed brightly. “Nah, girl. This is all me. Now, get dressed.”
We spent the next ten minutes brushing, washing, changing, and makeup applying. Well, Mercedes did the lion’s share of makeup applying. These boys had seen me in all my naked glory so no amount of lipstick would change their opinion of me now. To her, it was more like a date, to me it was just as she said, a distraction. Though, I doubted I would have any fun worrying like I was.
When we opened the door ten minutes later, Tom and Fang were patiently waiting, leaned against the hallway wall. They straightened at our approach. Nervous anticipation played over Fang’s features, but Tom just seemed amused. He was wingman tonight, I could tell.
If Fang was nervous and reserved, Mercedes had none of those issues. She strode up to him, put her arm through his and said, “Take me somewhere, handsome.”
The blush that lit up Fang’s features was legendary. He did as requested.
Tom and I followed behind, leaving enough room so we could whisper behind their backs.
“He really likes her, huh?” I said behind my hand.
Tom nodded heavily. “He’s only talked about two things this entire trip—Ki getting hurt and her. Mostly her. He keeps asking if I think she likes him. What kind of shirt he should wear. What her texts mean.”
“They’re texting?” A tiny kernel of anger flared in my gut as I realized Mercedes hadn’t told me. Then again,
I’d barely seen her since we’d arrived. I’d been a bit preoccupied.
Tom shook his head in frustration. “Are they ever? I’m in bed trying to sleep and all I can hear is the tapping of Fang’s thumbs and an occasional giggle.”
My eyebrows shot into my hairline. “Fang giggles?”
“When it comes to Mercedes, he does.”
We walked down the silent corridors, passing only the occasional worker. Even though we’d been at the conciliatory for a few days, I still marveled at its size. There appeared to be at least seven floors of which I’d seen only three. The staff had to be the size of a major hotel chain with housekeeping, cooks, maintenance and more. Along with the members of the conciliatory and their guests, we were in a mini, underground city.
“Are all these people dragons?” I asked Tom after we’d passed yet another of the housekeeping staff.
“Some are. Most are humans who’ve sworn an oath and agreed to work for the dragons for a while.”
“Isn’t Black Rock worried about his precious secrets getting out?” I asked.
“The staff signs an agreement to have their memory magically wiped when they’re done here. They wake up with some false memory of serving in the military or winning the lottery and have the fat bank account to prove it. Pretty sweet deal if you ask me.”
I gave him a skeptical look. “If you mean losing months, maybe years of your life, for money then yeah, I guess.”
“They agree to it, Lila. For the poor, it can change their lives. No one stays more than a year.”
I nodded, realizing it wasn’t my battle to fight. Plus, I would have done it too, if it meant giving Dad better care and a better life.
“How are you holding up?” he asked, turning his penetrating blue eyes on me.
I stalled, not ready to be vulnerable with Tom. Good thing he wasn’t Ki or he’d have all my secrets laid out on the carpet like face-up playing cards. “I’m fine.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Lila.”
“I’m coping, okay? It’s what I do. I just wish I had somewhere to kick some ass. That always makes me feel better.”
“Wish granted,” Fang said.
Perilous: The Dragon’s Creed Series Book 3 Page 10