In general, she was right. Both of our positions in life were precarious in that way. The pack was my home, but this individual house was not, just as it wouldn't be for her much longer either. "I hope you find a good mate as well."
She looked to Helena and then back as me. "I do too. Thank you." She roughly wiped at her eyes again. "I'd like to bathe him and then I was going to read him a story. Would you like to help me while Helena and Thomas go do something together for a while? I'd like to show you how I like to take care of him if that's okay. I'm sure you have your own ways and I'm not saying mine are right or anything though."
She'd helped to take care of him for a year. Of course I would learn all I could from her in the hours she still had left with him. "I would love to learn from you."
She smiled at me and touched my shoulder. Helena silently rose and left us, though not before looking at Lily again. I didn't miss the way they looked at each other, but I didn't comment on it either, and it wasn't something I felt needed to be reported to Abraham. They were close, which was understandable. That's all it was.
CHAPTER FIVE
Thomas
I was lying in the grass, doing nothing and trying to remain that way when Helena came over and sat angrily down beside me. "I don't like him here," she grumbled.
"You don't like anyone but my sister and our son," I argued. I actually didn't mind Owen being with us. I did hate what he represented though. By him being here Lily would be leaving us. And his presence meant that Abraham would always be watching us through him. "How often do couples normally have sex? I have no idea how many times a week we're supposed to pretend for his benefit."
She punched me in my shoulder and there was nothing gentle about it. "What?" I grumbled as I rubbed my sore arm.
"I'm planning to kill Abraham tomorrow, not worry about faking having sex with you. If you want to keep Owen as our omega when I'm the alpha that's your choice but I am not handing my mate over to Abraham to do whatever he wants with her."
I stared at her long and hard. If she was serious about then then that's what we would do. I'd always follow her. "What's your plan?"
"To poison him. We have Owen now. He can get close to Abraham. We'll take him with us when we take Lily tomorrow and then Owen will poison Abraham and I'll kill him. I'll be the one to do it that way no one can argue my position of power and say you did it and I just held the bottle or some nonsense."
I rolled my eyes. It wasn't a good idea. "Anyone who knows us at all would know that you'd never be the one just holding the bottle. I want Owen to know what he's doing though. We're not just going to have him poison Abraham and not tell him. He's an omega. It would be cruel to use him in the death of his alpha. He might not forgive himself for it."
Helena gave me a dark look. "You've known him less than twenty-four hours. Don't care so much about someone you literally just met. Not when your sister's life is in danger."
That was where she was wrong. If we started disregarding everyone who didn't immediately serve our needs or comply with what we wanted then we were no better than the alpha we were trying to get rid of in the first place. "I have to. Caring about everyone, and telling you when you're wrong, are how I'm going to be a good beta. You're going to be the alpha. I know you'll be good in that role. But you can't use people and expect everything to be okay because the ends justify the means at the time. Yes, we just met him, but he's got a good heart and he doesn't want to spy on us. I don't think he wants to hurt us either. So tell him what your plan is and then see what happens. If he doesn't want to go with us then we'll tie him up or something but at least give him a chance first."
Helena lay back beside me and sighed deeply. "I need you in my life. You know that right? Of course you're making sense. You're good for me. Not as my mate, but as the father of my son and as my beta."
It was how I thought of her as well. "I'm glad you're the mother of our child. And I'm glad that you'll be the alpha. We should have done this a long time ago, not waited until Lily was actually in danger first."
Helena reached over and took my hand. We laid like that for a long time. I didn't ask her how she was going to poison Abraham. I simply trusted her to have a plan and to tell me when and how to do my part.
"We'll talk to him this afternoon," she said.
"Good. Thank you."
"Do you want him for yourself?"
It was an odd question to ask, and not one that I wanted from her. "He's not a thing to give away," I reminded her.
She huffed at me. "Fine. I'll rephrase the question. After this is all over do you want to see if the omega wants you?"
I considered what she was saying. I also thought about a life where I could be with a man openly. Owen was gentle and kind and he liked my son. I could do worse. "When we get there, I'll ask him."
"I appreciate that you didn't say if."
I wouldn't have. She wanted to kill Abraham. She got what she wanted. Tomorrow our alpha would die. "You work on that plan. Make it perfect."
"Oh, it will be."
She gave me a wicked smile and I grinned back at her.
We headed back inside when it started to get dark. I'd had a good afternoon with Helena, fantasizing about Abraham's death. I didn't know where we would live after that, or even what we would do, but I had faith that Helena would have it figured out for us by tomorrow. I just had to follow her lead.
When we came in I found Lily and Owen sitting together on the couch with Jonathan between them. I touched her hair and then, on impulse, I touched Owen's shoulder as well. He turned to look at me, letting his gaze linger on me longer than I thought he needed to. But I didn't mind his attention either.
Helena pulled a chair up from the dining room table and I grabbed one as well. We needed to talk. All of us. Once we were all seated I let her lead.
"Owen, where do your loyalties lie?" Helena asked him bluntly.
It was enough to get Lily to turn off the TV as she looked between us all. "What's going on?"
"Let him answer," I said.
She pursed her lips, clearly wanting to know more, but she settled in for the wait anyway.
Owen looked at me when he answered Helena's question though. "I'm loyal to my alpha. Always."
That wasn't entirely what we'd asked though. "But not to Abraham necessarily?" I asked him to clarify.
He shook his head and I knew that we had our answer. It was a relief really, knowing that, even if he couldn't help us kill him, at least he wouldn't stop us from doing so. "As of tomorrow night Helena will be your new alpha, if you choose to stay with us. If you don't want to help though, that's fine. It won't be easy, and I don't expect you to do anything. If you can't, you'll stay here, tied up and unable to interfere."
Owen took a deep, shuddering breath while we all waited for his answer. I could practically feel my sister's excitement. She knew something big was going to happen. We all did. And we all had our parts in overthrowing Abraham as well.
"I would like to help. If you'll have me. It would be good not to have to hide anymore as well."
I hadn't considered that an omega would have secrets too. "What is it that you don't want Abraham to know about you?"
Owen didn't look away from me. "If I tell you my secret, will you tell me yours?"
That was a dangerous game, and one that could get us all in a lot of trouble. But I could give him half a secret without much trouble. "I'm bi and I prefer men." He had my secret then but not Helena's and not Lily's. They were both safe.
"I'm gay and I no longer want to be used by any wolf the alpha sees fit to pair me with."
"We all understand that," Helena spoke up.
I nodded. He wasn't alone in what he felt. "Helena won't ask that of you at all."
He smiled and some of my worry about him joining us or turning against us began to disappear.
CHAPTER SIX
Owen
"How do we know we can trust you and that you aren't just playing us to report back to
Abraham and get us killed for wanting to go against him?" Helena asked me.
It was a fair question and I appreciated her directness. I also didn't have a good answer for her though. "I don't know how to convince you that I'm telling the truth other than to say that although I have only just met Abraham, I don't want him as my alpha any more than I'm sure either of you do." It wasn't what either of them wanted to hear. I could tell that instantly. But I didn't have anything better to tell them. I wasn't happy with Abraham being my alpha. That had to be enough.
"Why come to us though?" Helena continued her questioning of me. "There are plenty of other couples in Abraham's pack. Any of them could have been better allies for you than us."
Somehow, I didn't think so. "I don't know what it is about you two, but I feel like I can trust you both. Like I was supposed to come to you two."
Thomas made a face. "Like fate?"
"If you want." I shrugged. I wasn't ruling out the possibility. Whatever got me out from under Abraham's rule. "I think you would make a good alpha." It was interesting to see their dynamic up close. I hadn't expected Helena to be more dominant than him, and I was glad that I was getting to see her as she really was now. She was a strong woman and I liked that about her.
"We can't get close to Abraham like you can so if you're willing to work with us, and do exactly what I say, we'd like your help tomorrow," Helena said. "I needed someone who he'd never suspect to turn on him. We aren't those people."
She was right about that, on all counts. Abraham didn't trust them, which was why I was there, but he had no reason not to trust his omega. "If you succeed, I would like to be in your pack, if you'll let me."
Thomas nodded. "We'll need a good omega."
"I give my approval for you to be in our new pack as well," Helena said.
Lily got up and went to her. I hadn't expected to see them so close together, but then Lily kissed Helena's cheek and took her hand before she turned to me. "As the alpha's mate in this new pack, I give my permission too."
This was the secret they'd been trying to hide from Abraham. I knew that now, and I also knew why Lily could never be handed over to him. "Thank you." I looked at them, at their little family and the secrets they were desperate to try to keep. No wonder they were willing to kill Abraham to keep each other safe. If I'd been a stronger wolf, if I'd had the backing of friends like them, then I would have likely done the same thing.
"What would you like me to do?" I asked Helena.
"Are you comfortable drugging him? If you are, then we could come in and kill him. I wouldn't ask you to do that part."
It was a good plan, in its own right. "If he was drugged, or poisoned, no one would know that it was you. There'd be no way to tie you to his murder. You wouldn't be able to take over his pack."
Helena nodded. "You're right. But then again, I don't want a war on my hands. I just want us all out of his pack. If he dies quietly, and then is found sometime later, there's nothing to say who actually killed him. We'll come back here. We'll quietly continue our lives much as they are now. When people start to tell us what happened, how he was found dead weeks after his death, then we'll act surprised."
"Someone will step up to take his place though. A bunch of lone wolves with no alpha around won't last long," Thomas pointed out.
"He's right," Lily said. She sounded worried. She had every reason to be as well. Unless someone took control of Abraham's pack, then nothing would change. Not for everyone anyway. For them things would be fine, up until the point that another wolf who wanted to be alpha came and tried to take them over again. It would be a fight no matter how they looked at it.
"I'll call him out, challenge his power," Helena said. She sounded excited about it too. "Then the pack would be mine. All of it."
"He'd never accept a challenge from a woman," Thomas replied gently.
I nodded. Abraham would only laugh at her challenge which would bring shame onto her and her family. "He would accept one from you, though, Thomas."
He pursed his lips and shared a look with Helena. "If I did this, if I attacked him, it would put you three in danger as well."
Helena huffed. "We're in danger anyway. You know that."
She was right, though I didn't say anything. As the omega, it wasn't my place.
Thomas sat back. "What if I challenged him, but you were my sword?"
I perked up at that idea. It was an old tradition, one no one had called on for generations as far as I knew, but Thomas's idea would work, if Helena would go for it. Centuries ago an alpha could challenge another alpha but have someone else fight for him. The law was never exclusively worded so that only alphas could use it, though only alphas ever had.
Helena looked interested as well. "We could do that..." She grinned. "I'd be the first female sword in history, I'm sure."
"You would be," I confirmed for her. I couldn't name a single other time when a woman had ever been considered, much less given that position. It was a place of honor and only ever given to an alpha's highest, and most trusted, champion.
"I would still prefer if he was drugged," Lily spoke up. She hadn't moved from beside Helena.
There would be no honor in his death then, but if he was just dimmed enough, it would make their victory more assured. "I could do it, if you had something that would dull him enough."
Thomas didn't look as if he liked that idea much at all. I wasn't sure if it was the dishonor in killing someone who had less of the capacity to fight back that bothered him, or that I would be the one doing it. I had no reason to think he worried about my safety though, so I assumed it was his honor he was worried about.
Helena took Lily's hand and kissed her palm. It was such a gentle, loving gesture that made me wish I could have taken a mate. I looked to Thomas, not wanting to watch them and intrude on them any longer than I already had. Thomas was looking at me too and I held his gaze for a moment before I had to look away. He was a higher-ranking wolf than me. I couldn't look into his eyes for too long.
"I have the sedatives I had when I was going through all that anxiety last year. I never took all that many of them," Helena said after a moment.
"They weren't good for when she was pregnant," Thomas explained to me.
I didn't need an explanation. I was okay knowing that they had something useful. I nodded. "I could put them in his tea or something."
"We would have to take Jonathan," Lily said.
He did pose a problem. He was too young to leave at home and if I was going to help them do this then I had to be there instead of staying here with him. Being at Abraham's house would put him in danger, but it was unavoidable if we were all to be there.
"You're staying here with him then," Thomas told her.
Helena shook her head. "Then Abraham would know something is up. She's right, we all have to go. We'll just keep him and Lily back, Owen too once his part in this is done. It'll be fine. I won't put our son in danger. We have a plan then, the four of us. All we have to do is trust each other and this will be okay. Right?"
She sounded like she was trying to convince herself as much as the rest of us. I nodded. I was in. I hoped that everything worked out, but if it didn't and we ended up getting caught and punished tomorrow then at least I'd tried to have some freedom for once in my life.
I supposed that there was no more reason to keep up the pretenses around me. At least that was how it felt when Helena and Lily went to bed together that night and Thomas put Jonathan to bed on his own. I stood in the doorway, ready to offer help if he wanted it, as he rocked his son and sang a little lullaby to him.
"Did you always want to be a father?" I quietly asked him.
He looked up at me as if he hadn't realized I'd been watching him before he laid Jonathan down in his crib for the night. "No, I didn't. I knew it would be expected of me, but before he came along I never really wanted children. Now I couldn't imagine my life without him. What we're doing tomorrow, for me it's as much to keep my sister safe as
it is to give my son a good way of life to grow up in. I trust Helena to make something beautiful out of the destruction of this pack, and I trust you to do what you can to help her with that as well."
I would do whatever I could to help him with that. He made to leave the room and I stepped aside, letting him go. He hesitated at the door to the bedroom he'd shared with Helena the night before. "Do you want to come in?"
I hadn't expected this from him. I'd thought joining them would have meant something different. "If you want me to I will. I'm your omega. You know that I won't refuse you." I hoped that he understood what I was saying. I didn't want to be that with him. I liked him. I didn't want to be forced to be under him like I had with so many wolves before.
He blinked as he turned to look at me, as if he was only now realizing what he'd said and hadn't meant a word of it. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. Never mind."
I stepped forward though before he could leave me for the night. "Then what did you mean?"
"That I've never had the choice of who I wanted to sleep beside. And I didn't know if you had either. I've never slept beside a man. Ever. I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow but if this all goes down in flames I'd like to have one night where I can say that I shared a bed with an attractive man, even if nothing else happened."
I blushed at his compliment and I came closer to him. "I would like that too. I've never just slept next to anyone either, not without the expectation of there always being more."
"I'd never expect more than that from you or anyone else. I'm not even expecting you to sleep next to me tonight or at all really. That's why I asked."
I came close to him and took his hand. It wasn't something I would have ever done under normal circumstances, but tonight was far from normal to begin with. He led me into the large room with pale yellow walls and a white bedspread with blue flowers on it. I didn't know if he'd picked it out or if Helena had. Right then it didn't really matter. It probably never would.
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