“You slept well,” I said.
“I did. How about you? Have you been able to rest?”
“A little.” I went to try and sit up but Jack laid a gentle hand on my shoulder.
“No, stay down,” he suggested and I nodded. Lying flat was better for me, especially my shoulders. “How is your pain?”
“Okay,” I replied honestly although Jack didn’t believe me.
“Are you just saying okay for the sake of saying okay?”
“No, it is okay. Lying down helps.” My words were coming a little easier and I hoped that meant that Vivienne was done lacing the fluids I was still receiving. Jack sat up, careful of his feet.
“How is your pain?”
“Better as long as I do not bump my feet,” he replied and picked up a bottle of water. He drank half and then helped me drink the remainder. My stomach growled. “Maybe we will get some food soon,” Jack suggested.
“Pizza.” The word popped out of my mouth automatically. It was the first food item to come to my mind and Jack responded with a groan.
“That would be delicious,” he said with a smile. “With lots of veggies.”
“And gooey cheese.”
“Maybe soon we will be freed and we can split a pie,” he suggested. His voice was sad. Neither one of us believed that soon described our release.
“You were dreaming of home when you slept,” I said.
“I was? How did…”
“You were talking in your sleep,” I interrupted him. “Which is something new for you to do.”
“Probably because it is something I want with all my heart, to be home with you and the children.” Jack’s hand slid under the blanket and found mine. His squeeze was gentle, careful of the manacles that were chewing at my wrists.
“I miss it so much,” I confessed.
“So do I.”
The door to the cell opened and Vivienne and William entered. I tried to put on a brave face although seeing them brought back so many terrible memories.
“I see you’re having a nice little chat,” noted William. “Vivienne, take care of that.”
“Please, no,” I begged. I knew what was coming.
“Bypass the IV, Vivi. Give it to her straight.”
“What are you giving her?” Jack demanded and was met with a backhand from William.
“Will you ever learn!?” William screamed.
“I… I… I am sorry,” Jack stuttered and drooped in submission. Vivienne kneeled next to me and despite my fear, I stared intently at the ceiling. I knew what she was going to do; she was going to inject me with Cat. Straight into a vein meant it would work within minutes. I would not be able to talk to Jack. Tears came to my eyes but I willed them not to fall. I didn’t want to appear weak. I had to be strong.
Vivienne whipped back the blanket and I briefly shook from the sudden chill. She was not gentle as she wrapped a tourniquet around my upper left arm and then roughly stretched my arm out as much as possible despite the manacles. I clenched my jaw in pain. She made a grand show of filling the syringe. It was full; more than she had used at once during my torture. Was it really so bad that Jack and I were talking? Then I realized the order to silence me probably came from Crystal.
I felt the pinch of the needle in my arm and the slight chill of the drug as it entered my bloodstream. As soon as Vivienne was done administering Cat, she and William left with William leaving us two protein shakes. The door closed and I looked at Jack. His face was one of sad disbelief. He was also bleeding from the nose after the hit from William. I said my words quick before they were gone.
“It’s going to be alright,” I said and Jack looked at me. “It won’t last for long. Maybe we’ll just have to be careful.”
“It is not right,” he replied and wiped tears away from his eyes. This tore at my heart.
“No, it’s not but it’s our reality. Let us just try and get… get through this.” My words were starting to disappear. “Jack… I’ll need your strength.”
“I will always be here for you,” he said. “I just do not like to see them hurt you.”
“I… know it hurts you but… but we just have… have to…” Talking was becoming near impossible. Cat was working faster than I anticipated. “Strong.” It was the last word I could get out.
“I wish I had your strength, Penelope,” Jack said as he recovered me with the blanket. “You are the strongest person I have ever known.” I looked away from Jack; his words were getting to me. I felt his hand on my cheek. Despite the chill in the room, it was warm and I closed my eyes to let the warmth overcome me.
After a few moments, Jack removed his hand. “Are you ready for a protein shake?” he asked and began shaking one of the bottles. I nodded. It wasn’t pizza but at least it was something. Jack fed me first although I wanted to tell him to go first. We were done with our moment of nutrition and Jack looked around.
“Excuse me,” he said and carefully crawled over to our waste bucket. I turned my head to give him privacy. The act made me realize I needed to pee also. How was I going to communicate my need? Jack was ahead of the game, however. “Do you need to go?” he asked when he was finished and I nodded. I wasn’t looking forward to moving but it had been a while since I last relieved myself and I didn’t want to get another urinary tract infection.
Jack was gentle as he helped me sit up and then brought the bucket over so I didn’t have to travel far. Getting to my knees was so painful even with Jack’s help and when the task was over, I couldn’t help but cry both from the pain in my knees and having peed as Landon had done so much damage. Jack held me gently until the pain had passed and then tucked me in. The room was chilly and although Jack wore shorts, I didn’t think it was fair that I was the only one using the blanket. As best I could, I lifted the blanket and motioned for Jack to join me under it.
“I am okay,” he insisted but I insisted right back. With a slight huff, he lay down facing me and adjusted the blanket. This was actually a better arrangement as his body heat helped to warm the space up a little. I looked at his face and my heart ached when I saw the dried blood beneath his nose. I hated to see him the victim of violence.
Jack stretched his right arm out for us to use as a pillow. I wanted to talk to him but my words were also prisoners. I hated not being able to speak and it was my turn to huff.
“What is wrong?” Jack asked. How was I to answer? And why was Jack asking me a question knowing full well I couldn’t answer? Anger swept through me and I went back to staring at the ceiling. “Penny?” Jack called but I ignored him. A bad mood came over me. Jack touched my cheek again but I moved my head away. Jack was silent for many moments. He was thinking and I knew he’d figure it out. I was not disappointed. “I am sorry for asking a question. That is not fair for me to do when you cannot speak. I am sorry.” He touched my cheek again and after a moment’s pause, I turned towards him. There was genuine sorrow in his face and my anger left as quickly as it came. I nodded in understanding and Jack leaned over to give me a kiss. The generally normal action meant ten times more in the situation we were in.
Chapter 6
Penny fell asleep soon after he apologized and he continued to mentally kick himself for what he did. As happened so often, he wasn’t thinking right. He made Penny angry which did neither of them any good in their situation. Think of something else, he thought to himself and his mind flitted through various events in his life. It finally landed on a sad event, the first time he had to say goodbye to his family for an extended period of time. Jack was emotional when it was time to say goodbye to Crystal. His schedule during the summer after graduation was packed and he would not be back home until after Labo
r Day.
“This is what you’ve been working for,” Crystal said as she hugged him as they stood in the driveway waiting for the taxi to come and take Jack and Danny to the airport. They were flying out to Los Angeles for a series of appearances on both TV and radio. The next single was ready to be released and another video needed to be shot.
“I know but I guess I never thought about this moment where I would have to say goodbye,” he said and took her hands in his. Despite the success the band was experiencing, she had not asked for anything more than a gold band to wear and hers matched the one he wore.
“I’ll be here waiting for you,” she said, “and besides, I can always fly to meet you somewhere.”
“Yes, we did talk about that but I do not know if I can go the whole summer without seeing the children,” he confessed. “If Penny comes along, the kids could come too. How does that sound?” For a brief second, he thought he saw disappointment in his wife’s face but it quickly disappeared.
“Of course, Jack,” she said and kissed him. With a sigh, he turned towards the swing set where Penny played with Millie and his children.
“Now for the hard part,” he said with a frown and he walked to the play area. Millie, a little Big Brain, knew exactly what was going to happen.
“I hate you, Jack!” she screamed and ran into the house. Millie was not taking his imminent departure well.
“I’ll talk to her again, Jack,” Penny said. “She’ll be okay. It’s just going to take her a little time.”
“I know,” he sighed and then knelt down in front Natalya who was fifteen months old. It would be the easiest child to say goodbye to. He pulled her out of the baby swing, hugged her, and kissed her two chipmunk cheeks. “Do not grow up too much, Nattie. Promise?” She raspberried her father and then laughed. When she saw Crystal approach, she squirmed in his arms.
“I’ll take her,” Crystal said and he handed her over. “It’s time for her nap anyway.”
“I will miss you, Crystal,” he said and kissed her one last time.
“Call me when you get to LA,” she replied and then walked off with tears in her eyes.
“Papa?” Jack turned around and saw Sasha standing in the fort part of the swing set. He would be four in September but he talked like a ten-year-old already. He adjusted the glasses he wore to help his terrible eyesight. Jack thought he looked so cute in glasses but every time he said that, Sasha admonished him.
“Yes, moye solntse?”
Sasha looked at Jack and suddenly, his face crumpled. Jack knew this was coming; Sasha had shown no emotion yet in regards to him leaving. Jack climbed up into the fort and held his son for several minutes.
“I know this is your dream, Papa, but I’m going to miss you,” he said as his chin quivered and tears flowed down his face. “Penny reads my bedtime stories okay but only you do the voices right.”
“How ‘bout this, Sasha? When I can, I will call you at bedtime and read your story, okay?”
“Really, Papa? You would take that time for me?”
“Of course, Sasha. I will always make time for my children and if you ever need to talk to me, just have Mama or Penny dial the phone. You may need to leave a message but just as soon as I can, I will call you right back. I promise.” Sasha threw his arms around Jack then quickly let him go.
“I have to go get my books, Papa, so you have them to read to me,” he said.
“Pick out your favorite five and then I will send you new books from out on the road. I will buy two copies, one for you and one for me. How does that sound?”
“That sounds perfect!” he exclaimed and flew down the slide and ran towards the house. Jack chuckled a sad chuckle. This really was harder than he expected. He had one child left to say goodbye to and that would be the hardest for him. Ellie was playing with her blocks and Penny on a blanket a few feet away from the swing set. Jack sat down next to them.
“Poppy,” Ellie said quietly and handed him a block.
“Thank you, Ellie,” he said and picked her up and set her down in his lap. She snuggled against him. It was her naptime also. He wouldn’t actually say goodbye to her; she didn’t understand what was happening. He chose to take the moment to say goodbye to Penny instead. “I will miss everyone, including you.”
“I’ll miss you, too, Ivan,” she said. Her voice was shaking and he wondered if she would cry. It would be the first time for that. “But as hard as this is, it is your dream.”
“I know,” he said and chuckled again. “I keep saying ‘I know’ but honestly, Penelope, I do not know. I have never been separated from you guys for this long. I am a little bit frightened.”
“It’s daunting, I admit, but you’ll have Danny with you and the guys in the band. Stick together, make smart choices, listen to Emerson’s advice, and work hard. Do your best, as I know you will, and try to also enjoy yourself. Soak up the unbelievable experience you will have over the next few months and years. This is the beginning of something magical, Jack. So many people have dreams and you are actually having yours come true. That is something very, very special,” she said. Her voice was still shaking but where he had to let his tears go, there were none to be found on her pretty face smattered with early summer freckles. He was so amazed by her strength. She leaned over and hugged him until Ellie began whimpering as she was smooshed between them. They laughed and so did Ellie.
“Penny, what is your dream?” he asked. A cloud came over her face.
“I don’t have a dream,” she said and looked at her hands.
“Everyone has a dream, Penelope. You can trust me with yours. We are best friends and I would like to know what your dream is. If I can help you achieve that dream, I will do whatever I can.” She looked up at him. There was such a sadness to her face. It took her a few moments but she eventually spoke.
“I want my dad to tell me he loves me,” she said, her voice so quiet and gentle. Jack didn’t know what to say and with a honk from the taxi, his home time was up. Penny pulled Ellie from Jack’s lap and stood. Jack kissed his daughter and hugged Penny.
“We will talk later.” That was all he could get out and he quickly walked to the waiting vehicle that had Danny inside of it already. Jack couldn’t even wave goodbye to Penny. As he opened the back door of the taxi after putting his bags in the trunk, Sasha ran up to him with five books.
“Here, Papa!” he cried. “Don’t forget these!”
The goodbyes did not get any easier over the years and the ache he felt now as a prisoner was so great it consumed him. Having Penny with him helped a little but that brought on unbelievable guilt as she shouldn’t have been a part of this to begin with. Actually, the goodbyes to Penny and the kids never got easier but after the big blowout with Crystal over the house, he found it easy to bid her adieu the next time he had to leave. That should have been his first clue things were not right between him and his wife. Actually, that should have been the second clue. The fact she ran off to Atlantic City for two weeks after Little Sofie’s birth was the first clue.
Chapter 7
Penny was not doing well. Her pain level had increased and she could no longer find a comfortable position to sit or lie in. The communication problem was frustrating her and the protein shakes were not sitting well in her stomach. She’d thrown up the last one which added to Jack’s worry for her. Penny was also not sleeping. It was due to a combination of pain and the nightmares that plagued her. She tried to hide both facts from Jack but that lasted only a couple days.
“Do not be afraid of the nightmares,” he said, trying to goad her into sleeping. “I will stay awake and if you have a nightmare, I will be here for you.” She shook her head and then indicated to him that he should be the one re
sting. “If you are not asleep, I am not asleep,” he insisted. She wasn’t happy with his words but he was insistent.
Without the ability to communicate, the hours stretched even longer. William and Vivienne would visit where the maniacal doctor would exam Penny and then Jack. For sustenance, they were just given protein shakes. They both needed real food but Jack was afraid to ask. This made him feel weak but there was so much fear over what William might do if Jack questioned anything that it left him submissive.
Penny sat back against the brick wall, the blanket wrapped around her. Jack wanted to ask for something for her to wear but again, he was afraid. Jack sat opposite her, the best position for him to be in if she tried to communicate with her bound hands. Her wrists were terrible looking from the manacles and he pondered the scars they would both have from the ordeal. How would he explain them to his family? He looked down at his gauze covered arm. There would definitely be a scar there but he could not see himself telling his children how he was first forcibly tattooed and then had a sadist burn that tattoo off with a butane torch.
He often thought about how the kidnapping ordeal would leave them. They both would have the physical scars but the mental scars he could see being the hardest to overcome. Mentally, they were both not themselves. How changed would they become?
Jack sighed and opened a bottle of water. He offered some to Penny but she refused. “You need the water, especially since you vomited up your protein shake,” he explained but for a second time, she shook her head. Arguing with her would do no good so he screwed the top back on the bottle and set it back down.
He really wanted to pace but with his beaten feet, that was impossible. Any slight bump caused them pain but he did his best not to let it show since Penny was in pain also. His back, which had been thrashed, hurt also. All the pain just left him weaker. Again, he sighed and his hand went to his matted, short hair. He couldn’t remember how long it had been since the last time he bathed but he would not turn down a chance at a hot bath. The thought of soaking in warm water was almost as torturous as thinking about real food.
Aftermath (The Deceptions Trilogy Book 2) Page 8