“I don’t know, why?” he answered but not before he hesitated long enough to grab my attention.
“Tell me Sam, where the fuck is he?”
“Ava, just leave him,” he advised quietly as I heard a door click shut and the background noise disappear.
“I will not just fucking leave him Sam, where the fuck is he?” I was gulping for breath in my fury.
“He’s at the club where he told you he would be,” he lied slowly, trying to calm me.
“Okay, so if I come down there; I’ll find him will I?” I asked angrily.
I heard him hesitate again. “Ava, please. You need to let him deal with this on his own. Don’t be up when he gets in,” he warned and I exploded.
“WHAT THE FUCK SAM? WHAT IS GOING ON WITH HIM?”
I could sense Sam’s guilt as he sighed. “Ava, sweetheart. Please . . .” he gulped.
“Oh fuck off, Sam!” I screamed and disconnected.
Courtney looked at me with sympathy and it was only because she was my best friend I didn’t smack her. “I don’t want sympathy Courtney, I want fucking answers,” I growled.
She held her hands up, “Ava . . .” she sighed.
“I’m sorry, hun” I closed my eyes and sagged down onto the sofa. “I need to get to the bottom of this,” I told her. I was determined it was going to be tonight.
CHAPTER 37
COURTNEY LEFT, AGAINST her wishes. She had wanted to stay to make sure I was okay but I sent her home, needing to deal with Mason alone. I turned all the lights off and settled on the sofa, awaiting his return.
At 4:30 he crashed through the front door. I stayed silent as he bumped into everything on his way to the kitchen. I heard him scramble around for something in the cupboards, swearing when he obviously couldn’t find what he wanted.
“Fuck it!” he snarled to himself and walked into the room, presumably to grab the whisky bottle from the cabinet in here.
He dragged himself across the room and switched on the lamp when he finally managed to get to it. He jumped when he saw me and narrowed his eyes. His pupils were shot and bloody, he had a few days growth and his clothes were crumpled . . . he looked like shit!
“Hey, darling.” I smiled sweetly.
“What the fuck are you doing up at this time? You need your sleep,” he admonished sharply.
“As though you care.” I scoffed and he glared at me.
“What the fuck Ava, of course I care,” he hissed and turned round to grab the whisky bottle but his reactions were too slow and I got to it before him, grabbing it and storming into the kitchen, I poured it down the sink.
“What the fuck are you doing?” he shouted and grabbed my arm, trying to pull the bottle back.
I slammed the empty bottle on the counter. “I think you’ve had enough, Mason.”
He grabbed both my arms. “What the hell is wrong with you?” he snarled.
I narrowed my eyes at him. “What the hell is wrong with me?” I scoffed and pushed him back but his grip tightened on me. “Let go of me, Mason,” I demanded slowly but he stood glaring at me, still gripping my arms in a painful hold which I knew would bruise by tomorrow.
I pushed him more forcibly and he stumbled back this time. I stormed into the room, him hot on my trail. The pure rage coursing through me was the only thing giving me courage to stand up to his fury. He rushed around in front of me, his face full of rage and his fists clenched. I regarded him and shook my head sadly. “Why won’t you talk to me, Mason?” I asked sorrowfully. I saw a flicker of remorse in his eyes but he quickly shut it away and glowered at me.
“Ha! She wants to know why I won’t talk to her,” he scoffed and gestured to nobody in particular then settled his gaze on me again. He started slowly stalking me, leisurely walking towards me.
I backed into the wall, I was starting to get a little afraid. It was obvious he was high and I was unsure of what he would be capable of in this state.
His hands slammed at the side of my head as he caged me in and I swallowed heavily. “You want me to talk to you, Ava? Cos’ all I wanna do is fuck you till you shut the fuck up,” he spat coldly. The malice in his voice turned my blood to ice. My eyes widened and my breath halted at his vicious words.
He cocked his head but then grasped my chin harshly in his thumb and finger and pierced my eyes with his dead empty ones.
My breathing sped up along with my pulse. He crashed his mouth on mine, kissing me roughly. I refused to give him a reaction so I stood still as his tongue tried to force its way in but I remained tight lipped.
He pulled back slightly. “Kiss me, damn it,” he ordered and came back down for another, bruising my lips and pulling at my nearly healed stitches. It now was getting painful, I pushed him back and slapped him hard across his stony face.
His eyes widened with shock and then he growled viciously. I wondered if I had gone too far. I gulped as my eyes filled with tears but I refused to let them fall, denying him a reaction to his callousness.
He pulled his lips angrily between his teeth and punched the wall beside me. “FUCK YOU AVA!” he roared as he stepped backwards. I took the opportunity to slide past him, not wanting to be caged in again.
“What do you want from me, Ava?” he thundered.
I turned to him and flung the DVD at him. “ANSWERS MASON, I WANT SOME FUCKING ANSWERS!” I screamed. His face paled as he saw the disc fall at his feet.
He looked up at me, his face now showing pain and horror. “Where did you find that?”
I shook my head. “If you don’t want me to see things Mason you should learn to hide them. You left it in the DVD player.” I told him quietly.
He raked his hands through his hair. “FUCK!” he hissed. “You weren’t meant to find that.”
I scoffed. “Well fucking obviously. What is it Mason, you wanted to keep it to yourself? You like to sit watching us fuck, eh?” I asked full of disgust.
“ARGHHHHH” he screamed, swiping the contents of the sideboard onto the floor and punched the wall again . . . twice!
“Oh for fucks sake, Mason,” I slammed and turned to leave but he grabbed my arm again.
There comes another fucking bruise!
He swung me round and stared straight into my soul. “Ava,” he whispered painfully and lifted his hand to my cheek. I flinched. He gasped and pulled away. “Ava . . . I wouldn’t hurt you.”
I laughed bitterly. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing now, eh? What is it Mason? What are you hiding?”
He spun round, pulling at his hair in agitation. “You won’t understand,” he snapped and placed a hand on the wall, resting his forehead on it.
“Try me, Mason. We can’t work this out if you won’t tell me,” I pleaded, calmer now but he shook his head and sighed.
“No Ava, you won’t.”
I bit my lip, preparing myself for the answer to my next question. “Are you fucking somebody else?” I asked quietly.
He turned sharply. “No! No Ava,” he swore but I shook my head sadly, hurt at his refusal to talk to me.
“I’m sorry Mason. I can’t do this anymore,” I sobbed, the tears now finally flowing.
He dashed over to me. “Ava, please,” he begged but I just shook my head.
“I can’t deal with secrets and lies, Mason. Your fucking mood swings are killing me. You are obviously back on the coke and I refuse to let you make me suffer with you.”
He stood silently begging with his eyes. I sighed sadly and turned to leave. “Ava . . .” he breathed and I paused, waiting for an explanation but he remained silent.
I let out a sob and carried my weary legs up the stairs. Pulling my case from the wardrobe, I flung some clothes in it; not caring that they would be crushed and creased. The need to get away from him spurred me on and after retrieving my toiletries and ramming them into my case, I yanked the zip round, snagging it twice in my haste.
Pulling it behind me I descended the stairs and saw him stood in the kitchen doorway l
ooking broken. “Ava, baby please . . .” he choked out. The ache in his eyes broke my heart. The pure need and desperation in them giving me reason to reconsider my decision.
I walked over to him and cupped his cheek gently. He rested against it, closing his eyes and pressing a kiss into my palm.
“I love you Mason, I always will. You helped heal me and give me back the confidence I needed. I will love you for eternity for that alone,” I whispered.
He opened his eyes. “Then stay,” he begged softly but I shook my head slowly.
“I can’t, Mason. You’re crushing my heart. You make it bleed, drop by fucking drop and soon you’re gonna squeeze it dry and destroy it completely.”
He grabbed my hand. “Please . . .” His own tears were falling now and I broke for him.
“I can’t live with secrets Mason, I can’t. I’m sorry,” I whispered. I turned to leave and walked away.
“Rebecca’s pregnant,” he choked out.
I froze, my heart finally shattering to the floor with my suitcase. “W. . . . w.what?” I stammered, paralysed to the spot, the sight of him might suddenly crumble my composure. “What did you say?” I asked calmly. I closed my eyes as he repeated his words.
“Rebecca’s pregnant,” he echoed softly and sadly, like the tenderness in his voice would make it alright.
I swallowed back the bile and lifted my chin in determination, refusing to break down. “How far?” I asked. He remained silent. “HOW FAR?”
“Four months,” he whispered and my throat closed in. Why did that bitch get the one thing I desperately wanted?
I sucked in my lips, trying to hold back the tears and clenched my fists tightly, “I thought you said you always used a condom with the others.”
For some reason it was this lie that hurt the most; he had said that the lack of protection with us was down to the raw passion we had, but obviously he had the same fucking raw passion with Rebecca and it was this that choked the sob from my throat.
“Oh, baby” he breathed with a choked whisper.
I heard him approach swiftly and I spun round. “DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME!” I hissed acidly.
He reared back at the pure hatred in my eyes. “I’m so sorry, Ava. I . . .” he cried.
I gagged. “My baby is dead you bastard, possibly helped along by your fuck whore, yet you . . . you . . . you and Rebecca . . .” I couldn’t finish as the pain ripped me apart.
I held my hand up as he reached out to me. “No! No! No!” I screeched and turned, walked calmly to the door and left; left him sobbing on the floor. I left my shattered heart right there with him.
CHAPTER 38
I WAS BANGING on Courtney’s door, loudly and repeatedly.
“Courtney,” I screamed. “Courtney . . . please!” I begged and slid down her door, sobbing uncontrollably on the step.
I eventually heard her locks slide. She opened her door and gasped at the sight of me. “Fuck! Ava,” she cried and bent down, lifting me against her and steered me onto her sofa. “Ava babe, what is it?” she begged but I couldn’t calm down. “Ava please,” she sobbed, the sight of me breaking her heart.
I was struggling to breathe, making myself retch with the extent of my crying, so she sat embracing me, stroking my hair until I calmed down.
“Please, Ava,” she wept as I screamed and sobbed and moaned as my heart tore me in two with the physical pain. “Shush Ava, shush sweetheart,” she soothed as she held me tight.
It took me an hour to calm down and by the end Courtney was pulling her hair out in distress. “Ava, please babe,” she pleaded once more. I finally managed to look at her.
“Rebecca’s having Mason’s baby,” I choked out.
Her face expressed every thought that tore through her; her skin paled, her eyes blazed and her breathing sped up. She couldn’t speak through her own fury. She inhaled sharply but stroked her thumb across my cheek gently and tipped her head in sadness.
I nodded in understanding and we wept again together as her heart broke for me, along with my own.
“How far gone is she?” Courtney asked softly as we were sat cradling coffee an hour later.
“Four months,” I answered with no tone or emotion in my voice.
She sighed heavily, “Well that’s one thing. At least you know it wasn’t while he was with you.”
I nodded once. Her hands rubbed her pale face. “Oh Ava, I don’t know what to say, babe.” She sighed sadly and I shrugged.
“There’s nothing to say, is there? Rebecca gets the baby and the man I want so desperately. Maybe God doesn’t think I’m worthy of being a mother?” I conceded nonchalantly and took a sip of coffee.
“Ava, that’s bullshit and you know it!” Courtney scolded as my phone trilled a message.
MASON
I know you won’t want to talk to me but I’m just checking you are okay, you weren’t really in any fit state to drive and I’m worried . . . I’m so sorry Ava.
My heart is broken for you, for every fucked up thing I’ve done to you and I will never forgive myself for hurting you like this. I love you xxxxx
ME
I’m not dead! Sorry to disappoint you.
MASON
DON’T FUCKING TALK LIKE THAT!
I refused to answer and stood up. “Can I borrow something to wear for the barbeque tonight, hun? I don’t want to go back to Mason’s.”
Her jaw dropped. “You’re never still going, Ava?”
I frowned at her. “Of course I am and I’m gonna get thoroughly fucking pissed,” I grinned. “In fact let me text Liv and see if she minds you tagging along and we can get drunk together. I bet there are lots of hot guys,” I teased.
She nodded and stood, walking over to the kitchen to pop some bread in the toaster. “Okay but I’m only coming to keep an eye on you,” she winked and I laughed.
* * *
At 7 O’clock we pulled into a semi-circled gravel driveway and looked in awe at the mansion in front of us.
“Jesus, Ava,” Courtney breathed. I just nodded.
“Yeah,” I puffed as I gawped at the huge home.
We managed to find a spot to park; the amount of cars in the driveway told us the party was already rocking and that Liv and Nate had lots of friends.
We were guided round to the back of the house by an attendant and as we approached the sight of the garden/meadow it took my breath. It was stunning; a real piece of heaven including a secluded brook.
The garden was decorated with tons of tables, a marque and lots and lots of tiny fairy lights. There was an extra-long table set up as a bar and at least three ginormous barbeques were smoking away, the aroma from the food making my mouth water and my stomach grumble.
“Ava!” Liv shouted and came hobbling over to us. “Hey,” she greeted, giving me a hug. “Are you okay Ava? Nate told me about your baby, I’m so sorry,” she said softly. I smiled and nodded.
“Liv, this is my friend Courtney,” I introduced and they greeted each other.
“Come and get some food before the guys demolish it all. What is it with men and meat?” she whispered and then she paused. “In fact, what is it with women and men’s meat?” she winked. We all laughed loudly, already relaxing.
She steered us to the bar and we grabbed a drink each. I piled my plate with steak, coleslaw and salad and went in search of a table.
“So where’s Mason?” Liv asked between mouthfuls and I lowered my eyes.
“Mason and I aren’t together anymore.” I shrugged. I felt a hand rest on my shoulder. I turned round to see Nate’s sad smile.
“I’m so sorry to hear that, Ava. You two seemed perfect for each other.”
I scoffed. “He seemed to be perfect with someone else too,” I laughed bitterly.
Liv’s expression softened and Courtney huffed. “Yeah, let’s just say the bastard tossed Ava’s love and trust away painfully and horrifically!” Courtney slammed.
Liv’s hand settled over mine, “Oh God Ava, you have r
eally been through it a lately haven’t you,” she whispered.
Nate reached over and kissed Liv’s forehead. “Have you seen Beth?” he asked her and she shook her head.
“She’s working late but she’ll be coming later with the new boyfriend. I can’t wait to meet him, she seems smitten.” She grinned at Nate with a twinkle in her eye and then turned to me.
“My best friend is the female version of a manwhore.” She laughed, “and at 41 I thought she would never settle down but fingers crossed, she finally seems taken with this new guy,” she revealed. We all laughed and then her face grew serious as her eyes focused on someone in the background.
“Ava sweetheart, I should warn you,” She grimaced a little. “Kerrie, Mason’s sister is here tonight. Nate knows her husband so they were invited. If I’d have known I wouldn’t . . . you know,” she apologised.
“Hey, Liv its fine. I have a good relationship with Kerrie.”
She breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank god, I thought things were gonna get ugly.” She giggled but I shook my head, a little tremor running through me at the thought of Kade being here.
“Anyway, I better go mingle,” she said and heaved herself out of the chair, her huge belly making the action difficult. Nate grabbed her hands, pulling her out. “Bloody hell big mama” he puffed.
She swat his arm, “Hey you did this to me” she scowled.
He grinned and pulled her into a side hug. “Oh God Yes! And I thoroughly enjoyed it” he winked.
We all laughed. “Typical” Liv chuckled, “See you two later” she beamed and wobbled off.
“She’s lovely,” Courtney said as we stood and made our way over to the bar for refills and Courtney went to refill her plate.
I was stood waiting for the barman to prepare my vodka and cranberry when a hot breath brushed my cheek.
“Hello again Ava,” Kade whispered huskily. I was sure I could feel his erection against my thigh, my body lit up in recognition and I clenched my fists.
I turned and plastered a fake smile on my face. “Kade,” I greeted.
His eyes darkened as he took in my appearance. The only item of Courtney’s clothes that I could squeeze my large breasts into was a pale knee length green wraparound dress that gave my cleavage a lot of airtime and knee high cream boots.
The NSC Boxset: Heart of Stone Page 54