by Mia Villano
By the time the doctor came back to see them, Lydia was asleep again and Jeannie paced the floor.
“Mrs. Franklin, I’m Doctor Thompson. What’s wrong with your daughter?” he asked. He looked too young to be working on her daughter. His voice was cold, and not at all reassuring. Jeannie told him the history of the migraines, and what Lydia told her. He wrote what she said down and asked her questions she couldn’t answer. Jeannie didn’t know if she saw double, slurred her speech, or lost her balance. She just didn’t know.
“I’m going to order tests. How long has she been this bad?” he asked, writing on a chart and not looking up at her.
“Well, today was the worst. She told me this pain in her head has been going on for six months. She just told me, the throwing up started last month, and the dizziness as well. She had lost weight too. She has been hiding her weight loss from me. I hadn’t noticed till I picked her up to get in the hospital. She was too weak to walk.”
The doctor walked over to Lydia and tried to wake her up from a deep sleep.
“Lydia. Lydia can you wake up?” he asked, shaking her on the shoulder.
Her eyes fluttered open which took a great effort.
“Lydia, its Dr. Thompson. I’m here to help you. On a scale of one to ten, can you tell me what the pain in your head is?” he asked.
“Twenty,” she whispered and fell back to sleep. Dr. Thompson turned back to Jeannie.
“I’m going to give her fluids. She may be dehydrated, which could be causing her headaches. Along with that, I will order pain medicine and a CT scan to rule out anything serious. We want to rule out a bleed or mass, which is standard. You said she had a history of migraines?
“Yes, they started when her dad passed away. We thought she got over them, but obviously they came back.”
“The blood work should tell us a lot. I want to give her something for her headache so she can rest. Her blood pressure is elevated and I think it’s from being in pain,” he said, this time looking at Lydia. Jeannie tried to take in everything he said in her tired, over-thinking mind. She just wanted them to fix her and get her back home.
Jeannie continued to hold her daughters hand. “Thank you, Doctor. Yes, she had suffered from migraines after my husband passed away. They stopped a year ago.”
“Did they give her a CT scan then?”
Thinking back, Jeannie tried to remember.
“No, they didn’t feel it was necessary at the time.” Jeannie felt guilt build up insider her. She remembered being asked if she wanted them to give her daughter one, though they said it wasn’t necessary, and Jeannie declined because of the cost.
“I will send the nurse in and we will get her down for a CT scan and go from there. Do you have any questions?” he asked. A commotion erupted in the hallway after several accident victims were brought in. The doctor drew the curtain around to keep their conversation more private.
“No, not now,” said Jeannie. Questions? What should she ask? Her mind was a muddled mess.
He left out the curtain and promised it wouldn’t take too long. Sure, she heard those words too many times being in the hospital. Everything took too long. A nurse came in and quickly put an IV in Lydia’s arm. Her arms looked so skinny, Jeannie wondered how they would find a vein.
As Jeannie gazed at her daughter, she stroked her arm, careful of the IV. Lydia always hated shots of any kind and if she would have been awake, she would have put up a fight with this IV. Jeannie couldn’t help but notice how young she looked. Her face at that moment, looked the same when she was six years old. She would walk around with a tiara, a tutu, and her tennis shoes every day. How quickly the time had passed. One of the most magical days in Jeannie’s life, was the day she gave birth to her precious daughter. She had suffered two miscarriages and gave up the idea of having children. Low and behold, she became pregnant again after she and Vince decided more children wasn’t meant to be. This time, Jeannie accepted the fact she would more than likely lose that baby too. She didn’t tell anyone, not even Vince right away. It wasn’t until she made it to four months, when she knew they were going to have a baby. That was the farthest she had ever carried without miscarrying.
Delivering her at nearly ten pounds, Lydia Rose Franklin came into the world to the happiest two people on the planet. Born two years to the day she lost her first baby, Jeannie felt Lydia was a blessing, an angel sent to them. Jeannie remembers her daughter lying next to her after she delivered, staring up at her with these huge brown eyes and it was love at first sight. There became a solid bond between mother and daughter, even during the tough teen years. Lydia looked like her father with his dark eyes and dark hair, and had her mom’s stubborn personality. Vince was beside himself with joy, and took Lydia with him everywhere. Four years later, after the birth of Michael, Jeannie and Vince were happy and complete with two children. Though they were young when they started their family, two was enough. She had a life many envied, and the most beautiful family anyone could ask for. She was more than blessed until it all fell apart.
Seeing her daughter sleeping with her hair spilling over her face, reminded her how young and innocent she still was. She turned sixteen last month, and Jeannie was unable to give her the birthday party they had planned since she was ten years old. Vince had always promised he would buy a car for her and they would go out driving the day she turned sixteen. The only thing they did, was go out to dinner with coupons at the local restaurant. Not much of a Sweet Sixteen for her daughter that was her world. Lydia didn’t care or complain. She accepted their plight, and even thanked Jeannie for the dinner and the small gift card to her favorite clothing store. Lydia didn’t complain about anything. She accepted the fact that their life of privilege and happiness was now poverty and sadness. That didn’t turn her into a different child like a change would have done with most girls her age. She took the blow of moving out of her beautiful home, and said God had a plan for them. When Jeannie suffered from depression, and barely made it out of bed, Lydia was there to help her. Lydia pulled her out of the depths of despair and reminded her a better life was coming. Her dear, sweet Lydia was more concerned for her mother than anything else at the time. When her friends would be spending the weekends at football games or sleepovers, Lydia spent the time with her mom. Lydia was her world.
Jeannie stepped out of the room and bought a cup of coffee from the vending machine when they took her daughter down for a CT scan. They wouldn’t let her go with them, even though she begged. They would be right back they told her. She took the time to call and check on Michael.
“Hey, how’s my girl doing?” Steven asked.
“We don’t know anything yet. They took her down for a CT scan, but I’m sure they’ll confirm its migraines. How’s Michael?” asked Jeannie.
“He’s fine. We did his homework, and he’s watching television. What time is he to be in bed?” asked Steven.
“By nine, and no later. I’m sure I will be home before then. Thank you so much, Steven. If we are here too much longer, I’ll call someone to come and get Michael. I’m sure you have school work to do,” said Jeannie.
“Its fine, Jeannie. I’m fitting in here. A guy with a wife beater asked if I wanted a beer when I took out the garbage. Not my type, though he’s cute in a white, trashy way,” he said. She couldn’t help but laugh a little. Steven lightened up any situation. He must have met Ralph, the guy living in the trailer next to hers. What a character. He and his wife didn’t work, fought all day long, and drank until they passed out. They didn’t cause a ruckus or bother anyone, and he would give you the wife beater off his back if you needed it.
“I’ll be home as soon as I can. I want you to know how much I appreciate this, Steven.” Jeannie started to cry again.
“Stop it now, Jeannie. Take care of our girl and give her a kiss from me.”
Jeannie rushed back to the room to find Lydia asleep. As she sat and waited for results, she prayed to whoever would listen to her for a miracle, on
e more time. She tried to keep her mind off everything by reading signs and checking the messages on her phone.
The doctor came in quicker than she expected. Jeannie thought she was in for a long night of waiting and worrying. She noticed by his voice, something was wrong, and Jeannie’s stomach rose to her throat.
“Mrs. Franklin, we are seeing something on the CT scan that has us concerned. We saw a mass in the left side of Lydia’s brain. We don’t know for sure what type or what it is. This mass concerns us enough, we are going to admit her and get more tests done. I want to send her to Children’s for a pediatric neurosurgeon to take a look at her CT scan,” said Dr. Thompson.
Everything faded to black.
Chapter 4
Jeannie woke up to a nurse in her face saying her name.
“Mrs. Franklin? Mrs. Franklin, can you hear me?” Jeannie found herself in someone’s arms and half sitting on a chair. The room was coming back into focus.
Jeanie came back around, as her eyes fluttered open. She forgot where she was until she smelled the pungent aroma of alcohol, and remembered what happened. The shock of what he told her, and the fact she had not eaten, led to her passing out in Lydia’s room. The doctor grabbed her before she hit her head on the floor. She sat up fully and remembered what the doctor said to her. There was a mass on the left side of her daughter’s brain. A mass was not good, and even in her limited medical knowledge, Jeannie realized that was bad news.
If it wasn’t for the fact she was Lydia’s mother, she would have run out of the hospital. She wanted to run and not face what lay before her. Why? Why was Vince not there with her? Why could he not be alive to stand next to her and hold her hand as she tried to comprehend the fact her sixteen year old daughter may be very ill. How could God be so cruel?
The nurse handed Jeannie a bottle of water and she accepted the cold drink with a shaky hand. The doctor came back in with a forced smile and hesitantly began to speak.
“Are you feeling better, Mrs. Franklin?” he asked, pulling up the stool next to her.
“Better, no I’m not. What are you saying Doctor? She has a …brain tumor?” asked Jeannie, trying to whisper so Lydia wouldn’t hear them.
“From what I saw on her CT scans and talking with Dr. Waterhouse the neurosurgeon on staff, we are seeing what looks like something on her brain. We want to send her to Children’s for an MRI and take a biopsy to make sure. We don’t know if it’s cancerous yet.”
“Can this mass be taken out if it’s a tumor?” she asked.
“I’m not sure. Her condition will be determined more with an MRI and biopsy. We are going to call down to Children’s and get a room ready for her and you can stay with her tonight, once we get this worked out,” he said, trying to look hopeful.
“She’s sixteen. How could this have happened? She was at the doctor last year for headaches and it wasn’t brought up anymore. They said she had migraines, brought on by stress of her father dying,” Jeannie fought back tears, trying to explain this to the doctor.
“That may have been the case last year. I don’t know how long Lydia had this or the extent of the problem. Everything is up in the air until they do further testing. I want her admitted to Children’s and they can get a better understanding when they have a specialist in tomorrow. I know it’s a lot of news in one night. Don’t start worrying. We have the best doctors around to treat your daughter and because she’s so young, most of the time it’s benign. I’m going to have Lydia transported by an ambulance. You can follow over in your car. Do you know how to get to the hospital?” asked Dr. Thompson. Jeannie nodded, yes.
Most of the time benign. She didn’t like what he said. Most of the time was not all the time. Jeannie looked down at her hands still shaking and she couldn’t make them stop. She reached in her bag and found an Ativan. Jeannie hadn’t had one since after Vince died. She kept them in her purse just in case. This was, “just in case” time.
Everything moved in a dreamlike state for Jeannie. She called Marsha and told her. She hated to impose, but she needed help, and Marsha would help with no questions asked. She told Steven to go home because Marsha was coming to get Michael. Steven asked to come to the hospital. Jeannie told him to wait till the next day, when they knew more. Jeannie drove herself to Children’s, though she didn’t remember the drive. Her head was going in different directions. She needed Vince. There would be more tests and more news to follow and she didn’t know how she could get through the hell without him.
Jeannie slept on a chair next to Lydia’s bed that night at Children’s Hospital. Her restless sleep was spent on a vinyl blue chair that reclined into a sleeping contraption. Lydia woke up a couple of times and asked where she was. Jeannie rubbed her back and told her everything would be okay and to go back to sleep. She woke up again around eleven, this time more alert and in pain.
“Hey sweetie. We had you moved to the Children’s hospital so they can run tests on you in the morning. You rode in an ambulance, and slept the whole time. Michael is going to be jealous. They wanted you to have a doctor specializing in children’s issues. They are going to do tests tomorrow. Are you hungry, or thirsty?”
“A little thirsty. Can I have a Coke?” asked Lydia, in a whisper.
Jeannie stood up and pushed the call button. “Let’s ring the nurse and ask if you can have one, okay?”
A tall, blonde nurse walked in with a smile. With her hair pulled straight back in a ponytail, pink lipstick, and a tan, she didn’t look like the typical nurse, her name said Carol and she was the friendliest person they had met.
“Can I do something for you?” She asked, still smiling.
“Lydia, would like a Coke. Can I get her one?” asked Jeannie, starring down at her innocent looking child.
Carol looked at her watch.
“We can manage. Let me get the Coke for her. She has to get it down before midnight. After midnight, no drinks or food are allowed. Lydia are you hungry, honey? I could get you Jell-O, applesauce, or maybe a Popsicle.”
“No, I’m good. Coke and well, maybe some graham crackers, if you have them,” said Lydia.
“I’ll be right back. Jeannie, do you want an extra blanket? Lydia, if you are cold I can get you a warm blanket to put on you.”
“I’m fine, Carol. Just get one for Lydia,” said Jeannie, sipping her cold coffee.
“How about fresh coffee for Mom?” asked Carol.
“You read my mind,” said Jeannie. She wondered how such a beautiful girl stayed so upbeat when there was so much sadness around her.
“You okay, sweetie?” Jeannie asked her daughter.
“I don’t know. My head stopped hurting, but I’m dizzy and in a fog. I hate being in here, Mom. This is why I didn’t want to come. All of this is going to be so expensive,” said Lydia, looking at her mom.
“Don’t worry. We will be out of here and home again. We have to get you better and find out what’s happening. Tomorrow we will know more. I want you to stop worrying about how much this costs. I don’t care if it’s a million dollars.”
“Where’s Michael, and what about work for you?” she asked.
“Steven stayed with Michael till eight, and Marsha and John took him home with them. He loves hanging out with John. I called my two jobs, and I’m not worried. Steven asked to come here tonight. I told him to wait till tomorrow. He sounded exhausted from watching Michael,” she said.
“I love Steven,” said Lydia.
“I know, and he loves you. He is a wonderful friend. Too bad he didn’t like girls, he would make a great husband,” said Jeannie.
“Mom, you’re gross,” she said.
The nurse came back in with the Coke, coffee, and graham crackers. Lydia was too weak to put her straw in, or open the can so Jeannie opened it for her.
“Thank you, Carol. You might as well hook an IV’s up to me filled with coffee. I’m obsessed,” said Jeannie.
“You and I both. It’s my one obsession,” she smiled and winked.
<
br /> “I have a couple. Coffee is my worst.”
Lydia managed a few sips of Coke and a couple bites of crackers. They turned on the television and tried to watch something. Jeannie just stared at the screen uninterested in anything. Lydia finally fell asleep again after another dose of pain medicine. Jeannie sat in the plastic blue chair next to her bed. Even though the chair reclined, she couldn’t sleep. She watched something on television that didn’t make sense, and she nodded off throughout the night. Her sleep was muddled with dreams of Vince. He was sitting with her on a park bench, they danced at a bar, ate ice cream on a beach. She would sleep for a while and jump awake.
Chapter 5
The next morning rushed in hard on Jeannie and even worse for Lydia. The nurses did a shift change, and Jeannie had to say goodbye to Carol. She would be back if they were still there in the evening. Her sweetness made their nightmare a little easier and Jeannie hated to see her go. Marsha strolled in around seven. Jeannie breathed a sigh of relief to see her when she walked in. She also had a bag with a clean pair of jeans, and a shirt for Jeannie. No questions asked. She was just there once again for her friend.
“Marsha, I’m so sorry for ignoring you so much. My life has been hell. Thank you for coming.”
“Stop it. I don’t want to hear you say you’re sorry again. I’m here now, and I won’t leave you.” Jeannie couldn’t believe what she heard. The tension in her body eased ever so slightly.
Marsha caught Jeannie in a hard hug. “How are you holding up, sister?” She wore a pair of flared jeans, a flowing peasant top, and a floppy hat, with her usual round glasses. She had a ring on every finger and her arms full of bracelets, clanging when she moved.