“I’ve got to get up early tomorrow,” I said, wondering if my excuse sounded as lame as it felt. “I’ll see you at school next week.”
I hurried over to Candy. “What was that about?” I asked.
“Trust me, you don’t even want to know.”
When we pulled up to the house, Daddy’s unmarked squad car was in the driveway, which surprised me. Momma said he had been working a lot of overtime lately, but I didn’t really believe it.
“I’ll see you guys on Monday,” I said, as my teammates chorused goodbye.
The house was quiet when I walked in, and for some reason it scared me. Whenever I went out with my friends, Momma waited up for me, and although I pretended I didn’t like it, it was something I expected.
“Where you been?” Daddy asked from the darkness of our den.
“I went out with my friends. Didn’t Momma tell you?” I asked.
He didn’t respond. I heard ice clinking in a glass, and I knew he was drinking. I hated it when he drank.
“Where’s Momma?” I asked.
“Somewhere upstairs,” he muttered.
“Do you have to go back to work?” I asked, trying to make conversation as I turned on the hallway light.
Daddy and I rarely talked, and when we did, it seemed as though I was always the one initiating the conversation.
“Nah,” he said.
“Where’s your car?” I asked.
He glanced at me like I was annoying him. “Why?” he asked.
“I was just asking,” I said.
“I had an accident, so I have the squad car until I get it fixed.”
I didn’t even bother to ask if he was okay. “Good night,” I said and headed upstairs. Cory was already asleep, and I found Momma in her room reading her Bible.
I knocked on the partially open door. “I’m back,” I said.
She smiled. “Did you have a good time?” she asked.
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Where’d you guys go?”
I told Momma about my evening, and although I knew she was listening, her mind seemed to be somewhere else.
“You okay?” I finally asked.
“I’m fine, baby,” she said.
“What did you and Cory do after the game?”
“Nothing much. I was trying to get ready for church tomorrow. Don’t forget we have to be there early for the annual prayer breakfast.”
I nodded, trying to hide a yawn.
“Why don’t you get to bed? You’ve had a long day.”
“Okay,” I agreed. I walked over to give her a hug.
She didn’t bother to respond. “Momma, are you okay, really?” I asked, searching her eyes.
She patted my hand. “There’s nothing for you to worry about, sweetie. Everything is fine.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I said. “Good night.” I turned to leave then swung back around and gave her a hug. “I love you, Momma.”
She squeezed me so hard I thought my ribs would break. “I love you, too, baby.”
I got ready for bed, all the while thinking about Momma, trying to figure out why she stayed with Daddy. From what I could see, she didn’t love him—I mean they rarely spent time together, and any time Daddy was home, the house was filled with tension. She had a job, so she couldn’t use not having money as an excuse. I just didn’t understand, and deep down, I didn’t want to.
It didn’t take me long to get dressed for school Monday morning since I had picked out my outfit the night before. Knowing I was going to see Allen in class every day, I always tried to dress my best, but I went above and beyond this time because I knew we were going to be studying together. I put on a red wrap dress and some red heels and looked at myself in the mirror, realizing I looked like I was trying too hard. I took off the outfit and tried on three more before I finally settled on some jeans and a wrap top and some heels.
I put on some lip gloss and eyeliner, then took off my wrap cap and styled my hair. Finally I added some gold earrings and my purity necklace.
“You look nice,” Momma said when I finally made it to the breakfast table. “Anything special going on today?”
“No,” I said. “Hey, munchkin.”
“Hey,” Cory said, glancing up from her Game Boy.
“I was running a little late so I didn’t cook,” she said apologetically as she set a bowl of oatmeal in front of me.
“It’s okay, Momma,” I said, digging in after we said grace.
I tuned out the conversation she and Cory were having, focusing instead on my meeting with Allen. By the time I made it to school, I was nervous, but I had no reason to be.
Allen never showed for study hall, and I felt so stupid.
When I met up with Bree for lunch, I tried to play off how much it bothered me, but she knew.
We made small talk all through lunch, and I was just about to dump my tray when Allen walked in. He waved at me like nothing was wrong, but I ignored him. When I heard him calling my name as I walked out the lunchroom door, I thought about not responding. He caught up with me and grabbed my arm, swinging me around.
“I’m so sorry,” he said. “I had to meet with Coach Patterson, and it ran late.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I said, not bothering to make eye contact with him. Instead I spoke to a few kids who were passing by.
“Courtland, please don’t be mad. I promise it won’t happen again,” he pleaded.
“You could have at least texted me,” I said, finally looking at him.
“You’re right,” Allen said, looking at the floor. He glanced back up at me with a huge smile, showing the dimple in his cheek. “I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
Seeing the dimple did something to me, and before I knew it, I had forgiven him.
“Just don’t let it happen again,” I said.
“I won’t,” he said and he reached down to give me a hug. I closed my eyes, loving the brief moment in his arms. It was better than anything I could dream of—until I spotted the hickey on his neck.
three
I know I shouldn’t have been mad at Allen. I mean, it’s not like he’s my man, but seeing that hickey made me so jealous. I wondered if he had been with some other girl when he was supposed to be studying with me, but I didn’t ask him because I didn’t want him to think I liked him.
“So when do you want to get together?” he asked.
I thought about my schedule for the rest of the week, excited he still wanted to see me. Although I could have made the time, I didn’t want him to think he could just see me whenever he wanted. “It looks like you’re going to have to study for this test on your own,” I said. “I’ve got to help my best friend with something during study hall and I have cheerleading practice after school for the rest of the week.”
We had started learning our first dance routine, and Bree was already behind, so I had promised her I would help her. We could have worked on the dance at my house after school, but I didn’t want Allen to think I didn’t have a life.
Allen stood looking at me. “I’ve got to do well on this test,” he said. “I want Ms. Watters to see that I’m serious about passing this class this time. What about if I come over to your house after practice? Your mom said it would be okay,” he said.
I laughed. “I think she was just saying that to be polite. I’m not allowed to date yet, so I don’t know if she’ll really let you come over.” I couldn’t believe I had told him that instead of pretending I just wasn’t interested.
“Well, it’s not like it’s a date, so it won’t hurt to ask her, will it?” Allen said.
I shrugged and looked at the ground since he’d cracked my face. “Why do you want to study with me so bad?” I asked curiously. “I’m sure there are other people who wouldn’t mind helping you.”
“Yeah, but they’re not as cute as you,” Allen said.
I couldn’t help but blush.
“I’ll talk to your mom after school,” he said, “and I promise I’ll b
e there on time.”
Allen kept his word. He was waiting on me when I got out of practice, and together we walked to my mother’s SUV.
“Hey, Mrs. Murphy,” he said, bopping up to the driver’s side.
“Hi, Allen,” she said and gave him a smile that lit up her whole face.
“I was wondering if I could take you up on your offer to study with Courtland. We have a test coming up this week, and I really need her help.”
I didn’t look at Momma because I didn’t want her to know how much I wanted her to say yes. After what seemed like forever, she finally said, “I guess that will be okay. When would you like to come?”
“How about now?” he said. “If it’s okay, I’ll ride with you since my car is in the shop. I’ll have my dad pick me up later.”
I don’t think Momma was expecting his response. I know I wasn’t.
When Momma agreed, I was about to climb into the backseat so Allen would have room to stretch his long legs, but he told me he’d be fine in the back, so he got in next to Cory, who was, as usual, absorbed in her Game Boy.
I was nervous the entire ride home, trying to remember if I had made up my bed. Then I relaxed, realizing Allen would be in the kitchen and maybe the den, both of which were spotless, just like the rest of the house. I still couldn’t believe Allen was headed to my house to sit at my kitchen table and study.
I glanced over at Momma, and she winked at me, and I couldn’t help but grin. She patted my leg, indicating I needed to chill. I turned on the radio, and when I heard Momma’s favorite gospel station, I went to change it, figuring Allen liked 95.7 Jamz.
“Do you mind leaving it? I love that song,” he said as Donnie McClurkin sang his latest hit.
Momma glanced at him in the rearview mirror. “Do you attend church, Allen?” she asked.
I was so embarrassed. I couldn’t believe Momma was questioning Allen Benson about his salvation. The guy was too busy playing basketball to have time for God.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said. “My dad and I are very active—in fact my dad is a deacon at our church. I play basketball for the church’s team, and I help out with the younger kids when I have time.”
Momma nodded in approval, and I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised.
“What does your mother do?” she asked.
“My mom used to teach high school English in Hoover,” he said. He had this expression like he’d been busted.
“Really?” Momma said with interest.
I turned to him. “So if your mom’s an English teacher, why do you need my help?” I asked.
Momma glanced at him in the rearview mirror, also awaiting his response.
“My parents are divorced, and I live with my dad. My mother doesn’t like to get involved with my schoolwork,” he said. “She said since teachers teach different ways she doesn’t want to mess up the way I’m being taught at school.” He shrugged and focused on Cory’s Game Boy, pointing out something on the screen.
“That was a real slick answer, Allen,” Momma said. She tried to be stern, but I could tell she wanted to laugh.
He grinned at her, showing his dimple again, and I wanted to melt. For the first time, I started to wonder if maybe he was coming to my house because he actually wanted to spend time with me, even though he said it wasn’t a date. I decided not to let myself focus on that thought.
Daddy’s car was in the driveway when we got home, and I saw an annoyed look pass over Momma’s face. It happened so fast, I wondered if I had imagined it.
“Your father’s home,” she announced, although I wasn’t sure why since it was obvious he was there.
We piled out of the car, and Allen offered to get the groceries Momma had put in the back, and I hung around to help.
“I see someone around here likes to hoop,” Allen said. He nodded at the basketball rim attached to our garage.
“I fool around every now and then,” I said.
“You do?” he asked, sounding surprised.
“Yeah.”
“This I’ve got to see.”
“Just name the time and place,” I said.
We walked in the back door as Momma was opening the door. She immediately shouted, “Corwin, we’re home. We have company.”
I wondered what was up since we normally didn’t say anything when Daddy was home. He said he hated all the noise we made when we walked through the door, so Cory and I usually headed up to our rooms when he was there.
“Anybody hungry?” Momma asked, glancing nervously toward the den, which is where Daddy normally hung out.
Allen made himself comfortable at our kitchen table like he sat there all the time.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, rubbing his six-pack.
Momma glanced at me, and I had to tear my eyes away from Allen’s stomach, which he had exposed when he rubbed it. “What about you, Courtland?”
“Uh, sure,” I said. I jumped up from the table before my thoughts got me in trouble. “Do you need some help?” I asked.
Allen got up, too. “What can we do?” he said.
I didn’t want to admit how much I liked the sound of that word we. It felt like my heart started doing dance moves in my chest.
Cory continued to sit at the table playing her game, and Allen popped her on her head. “Girl, get up and help your momma,” he scolded.
Cory jumped up, ready to do whatever Allen asked. I’m sure if Allen had thrown a bone Cory would have gone to fetch it. Actually, I probably would have, too.
“All of you, sit down,” Momma said. We did as she asked. “Allen, I’m glad to see your parents raised you right. Maybe you can help me whip these lazy bums into shape,” she joked.
“No problem,” he said, stretching out his long legs under the table.
Momma got busy fixing us a snack, and Allen, Cory and I opened our books so we could study. She placed a plate of cut-up apples and caramel dip along with some plates in the center of the table, and we dug in.
“Man, this is better than those Apple Dippers from McDonald’s,” Allen said. “Thanks, Mrs. M.”
I smiled at the nickname, and reminded myself to remember everything that happened from the moment I saw Allen so I could tell Bree.
“You’re welcome, dear,” she said, patting his shoulder. “Why don’t you call your dad to see if you can stay for dinner? I’m making fried chicken—”
“Trust me, you want to stay,” Cory said. “My momma makes the best fried chicken in the whole world.”
Allen nodded. “Thanks for the heads-up.” He turned to Momma. “Are you sure it won’t be a problem?”
“Not at all,” she said. “We’re happy to have you. After you make the pros, I can brag I had someone in the NBA sitting at my kitchen table.”
We all laughed.
“What’s so funny?” Daddy asked, appearing in the doorway.
I had forgotten he was there. When he walked into the room, the whole atmosphere changed. I prayed he wasn’t going to do or say anything stupid.
Daddy turned his gaze on Allen. “What are you doing in my house? My daughter isn’t allowed to date,” he said.
I couldn’t believe he was being so rude. When I was in elementary and junior high, my friends used to love hanging at our house because they all thought my parents were so cool. The summer before ninth grade that all changed, though. Daddy had been on the force about ten years then, and a pregnant woman had been killed during a hostage situation at a bank. I overheard Momma tell a member of our church Daddy felt bad because he had promised her that she would be okay only minutes before the bank robber shot her. After that, Daddy changed. He started drinking more, and he was grumpy all the time. Whenever he was home, it was uncomfortable for all of us.
Allen didn’t seem fazed. He stood and walked over to Daddy, towering over him by about three inches. “Hi, Mr. Murphy. My name is Allen Benson. Your daughter is tutoring me in English.”
“I know who you are. I don’t want you in my house.”
“Corwin,” Momma said, shocked at his words, although I don’t know why.
“It’s okay, Mrs. M.,” Allen said. “If I had a daughter as beautiful as Courtland, I’d be trying to protect her, too.” He gathered his English book and put it in his backpack, and I wondered how he was planning on getting home. “Is it okay if we study together at school? I’m interested in dating your daughter, sir, but I promise you I’ll wait until she’s seventeen. Until then, I really would appreciate it if you would allow us to study together. I don’t know if you know it, but I want to go pro at the end of the school year, and I need your daughter’s help to make that happen.”
Everyone in the kitchen was silent as we all looked at Daddy. I was staring at him, but I was more focused on the fact that Allen wanted to date me.
“You can stay,” Daddy finally muttered. “At least here we can keep an eye on you.” He walked out of the room and Allen took a seat at the table. When I looked at him, he winked at me.
Momma seemed to relax a little. Allen went to call his dad, and Momma started making dinner. When Allen returned, he, Cory and I sat there studying.
When we finished, Momma said we had about twenty minutes before dinner.
“You up for a little one on one?” Allen asked.
“You ain’t said nothing but a word,” I said, sounding like Aunt Dani. “Momma, we’ll be back. Let me go whip this boy real quick.”
“Oh, it’s like that?” Allen asked.
I just smiled.
We both still had on our practice clothes, so I grabbed a ball from the garage and we headed to the driveway. “Let’s play to twenty,” I said, passing the ball to him.
It took me a second to get in my groove since I hadn’t played in a while, but once I did I showed Allen no mercy. He ended up winning twenty to nineteen, but it was a good game.
“Girl, where’d you learn to play like that?” he asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know,” I said. “I guess I’ve just got skills.”
He laughed.
“Courtland, dinner’s ready,” Cory said from the garage.
The Pledge Page 4