DI Steel laughed, thumbs jabbing away at the keypad on her mobile phone. ‘Aye, right.’
‘You will not consume alcohol outside of your place of residence.’
‘Pffffff…I’m surprised you got that one past a judge.’
‘You will not accost any member of the public-’
Frown. ‘What?’
Danby’s voice rumbled out from the corner. ‘It means if you’re alone with anyone, and you make them feel uncomfortable, we can lock you up for five years.’
‘That’s not fair! I can’t control if someone feels uncomfortable, can I?’ Knox waved a hand at him. ‘Anyway, what about confession? Have to be alone with me priest, don’t I?’
Danby scowled. ‘You’re a Protestant, you don’t have confession.’
‘Well…what about the people watching us then? Me keepers?’
PC Hamster fiddled with her glasses. ‘You don’t have to worry about that, Richard, there’s going to be two of them at all times. We’ve got a specialist team from Sacro who’re going to keep an eye on things. You’ll be fine.’
‘You will not drive any vehicle without a member of your supervisory team present.’
Knox shrugged and collapsed backwards until he was lying down, staring at the ceiling, his legs dangling over the side of the bed. The mattress creaked.
‘When I was little, I remember hearing them in here. Granny Murray and Grandad Joe. They must have been in their sixties or seventies, but they still did it every Friday night, regular as clockwork. You could hear the squeak of the springs from me room…’
He swung his legs, making the mattress groan in time to the motions.
‘The pair of them going at it in here while I was in the next room. Don’t think she really enjoyed it like, but it was her duty, you know? Keep the old man’s urges satisfied.’
‘Right.’ DI Steel pushed herself away from the wall and slipped her mobile back in her pocket. ‘I’ve had enough of Creepy Sod Theatre for one morning. We done here?’
Logan checked. ‘Two more: you shall not visit any gay bars, clubs, or associations. And you will not obstruct the efforts of any supervising agency. That’s the lot. Do you understand these restrictions?’
The weedy little man flopped an arm over his eyes. ‘I suppose.’
Logan passed the paperwork back to Danby. ‘You want a lift back to the station?’
‘What?’ Knox sat up. ‘You’re not leaving us, are you Graeme? You were right quiet on the plane. I was hoping you’d join us for dinner: you know, get a nice curry and some poppadoms? We can catch up a bit, like. Reminisce about the good old days. You, me, and Billy Adams…’
Danby stiffened, then turned to look out of the bedroom window. ‘A lift would be good.’
‘So,’ Steel cracked open the passenger window and flicked a disk of chewed gum at a passing taxi, ‘you want to tell us why a detective superintendent traipses halfway up the country to babysit a manky wee rapist like Richard Knox?’
Danby shrugged, his huge shoulders going up and down as he stared at the passing scenery. ‘Maybe I just fancied a jolly to Aberdeen.’
‘Aye, and maybe my arse is made of Toblerone.’
Sitting in the back with the DSI, Logan tried not to picture that.
They’d let PC Guthrie drive. He joined the queue of traffic waiting to turn left onto Westburn Road, juddering to a halt inches from the back end of a bendy bus.
A park ran along the side of the road, complete with pond and bored-looking ducks, the dark scribble of bare trees. Other than that, the place was nearly empty, just a mother and her small child hauling a yapping terrier across the wide expanse of browny-green.
Danby sniffed. ‘Can’t believe you’ve got no snow. We were up to our ears in Newcastle this morning.’
‘OK, let’s try this another way, shall we?’ Steel produced a packet of nicotine gum and popped a white pellet out of its foil blister. Chewing with her mouth open. ‘Who’s Billy Adams?’
‘It’s not important.’
‘Sounded important.’
Danby’s face hardened. ‘Drop it, you know what I’m saying?’
‘That an order, sir?’
‘Call it a request.’ He turned to Logan. ‘These Sacroid people, they up to keeping an eye on Knox?’
‘Sacro: Safeguarding Communities — Reducing Offending. It’s a charity, biggest provider of supported accommodation for offenders in Scotland, got teams of volunteers watching people like Knox all over the country. Well, maybe not exactly like Knox, but yeah, they’re up to it.’
Steel rolled her window back up. ‘You know, I’m going to find out eventually, so you might as well spill the beans.’
Silence.
‘See, I’m what you’d call a tenacious wee sod.’
More silence.
‘Seriously, I can be a right pain in the arse when I put my mind to-’
‘That’s enough Inspector. You do your job and I’ll do mine, know what I’m saying?’
And this time the silence lasted all the way back to the station.
‘I love a good mystery.’ DI Steel sat behind her desk, one hand stuffed down the front of her shirt, rearranging the contents of her bra. ‘God gave me a nose for a reason — so I could stick it in other people’s business. Who do you think this “Billy Adams” is?’
Logan shrugged and dumped the plastic bag from Marks amp; Spencer on the inspector’s desk. ‘They didn’t have any of the big ones left.’ He cleared a space between the burglary reports and trial-preparation documents, then pulled out two little boxes of sushi, a packet of cheese and onion, and a bottle of Diet Coke.
Steel popped open the crisps, stuffed a handful into her mouth, then followed it up with a California roll. ‘Maybe he’s Danby’s boyfriend?’
Logan dug into the bag again: prawn salad and a sparkling mineral water.
Steel scowled at him. ‘Salad? Jesus, all this time and I never knew you were turning into a shirtlifter. Still,’ a smile spread across her face, ‘if that means your tasty IB tart’s up for a bit of extracurricular…?’
‘I’m on a diet, OK?’
‘Bout time. You’ve turned into a right porky wee sod.’ Something in her pocket went ‘bleep’ and Steel pulled out her mobile phone, frowning at the screen. ‘Sodding hell…Thought it was my chiz. Been trying to get hold of him all day.’ She washed a salmon nigiri down with a mouthful of Diet Coke. ‘Finish your gayboy salad, then get digging: I want to know who this “Billy Adams” is, and I want to know how he’s connected to DSI Fat-and-Shouty: anything you can find.’
‘Beattie wants me to-’
‘Don’t care.’ She stuck her fingers in her ears. ‘La-la-la-la-la. Can you see me no’ caring?’
‘You’re not the one he’s whinging at the whole bloody time.’
‘Which part of “La-la-la-la-la” do you no’ understand?’ She popped a fingernail of wasabi into her mouth and made dog’s-bum faces for a minute. ‘Then we’re going to have to go do something about these counterfeit twenties.’
‘I mean, why did they bother promoting him? My arse would make a better DI.’
‘Get onto that bank. Tell them I want security camera footage, see if we can’t find out who made the deposit.’
‘Do you never read the stuff I give you?’ Logan went digging through the pile of paperwork in the inspector’s in-tray, coming out with the printouts he’d slapped down on her desk before the morning briefing. ‘Here.’ He tried to pass them over, but Steel had a cucumber maki in one hand and a bunch of cheese and onion crisps in the other.
‘Eating. You read it.’
‘We’ve already got an ID — the guy tried to deposit the cash into his own account. Kevin Middleton. Only prior he’s got is for drink driving twelve years ago, wrapped his Jag around a lamppost in Cults after some charity auction.’
Steel smiled as she chewed. ‘Perfect. Arrest the silly bugger, then we can all get on with our lives. You thought any more about being God
parent, by the way?’
Logan almost choked on his salad. ‘I…Erm…’ Mouthful of water. ‘I don’t know if…Ahem.’ Pause. ‘Anyway, how come the Perv Patrol aren’t dealing with Knox? How come this is our problem?’
The inspector’s eyes narrowed, making all the wrinkles stand out. ‘Our lord and master DCI Finnie thinks the Offender Management Unit need someone senior to personally oversee Knox’s case. Apparently it’s too high profile. Apparently I have experience with sexual predators. Apparently I’m the best person to support the Diddy Men in this difficult and delicate operation.’
She scrunched up her empty crisp packet and hurled it at the bin. Missed. ‘Which means Frog-Face Finnie knows Knox is an odious wee shite, and if anything goes wrong, I’ll be the one carrying the can.’
‘Maybe it won’t be that bad?’
‘Course it bloody will: Knox’ll need someone watching him till the day he dies. So I’ll no’ get shot of him till I retire. It’s the gift that keeps on sodding giving.’ Steel scowled. ‘But don’t you worry: I shall have my revenge. Meantime, you go see what you can get on this Billy Adams bloke Danby’s being so secretive about.’
6
‘Aw, Jesus, not again!’ Detective Sergeant Mark MacDonald wrinkled his nose, then slapped a hand over his face, hiding his wee goatee beard. ‘Ack…’ He grabbed a folder from his desk and fanned it back and forth, sending paperwork fluttering across Logan’s desk.
‘What are you…’ Logan frowned, and then the smell hit him. ‘Bloody hell, Bob!’
DS Bob Marshall just grinned. If God existed, He hadn’t been paying a lot of attention when He’d put Bob together. Big ears stuck out at right-angles from a square head with a bald patch at the back and a single, thick eyebrow at the front. Arms like hairy string. A monkey in a machine-washable suit.
‘Christ!’ Mark blinked, then hauled the door open. ‘What’ve you been eating?’
Bob patted the sides of his stomach. ‘Can’t beat cauliflower cheese and chips.’
‘Oh no it’s everywhere…’ Logan stood, backing away into the corner of the little walled-off section of the CID office, built to house the detective sergeants. Six desks — four for dayshift, two for night — all but one covered in drifts of paperwork and ring binders, monitor, keyboard, and overflowing in-tray. The walls were just about visible between the procedural flowcharts, a corkboard covered with mugshots and memos, a whiteboard with each DS’s name written above a list of active cases, another one with a schematic of some drug dealer’s house scrawled in blue marker pen. And a yellow-and-black biohazard triangle mounted above Bob’s desk.
Mark wafted the door open and closed, and open and closed…‘Never mind fucking Iraq, bloody United Nations should invade your arse. That’s a weapon of mass destruction, right there!’
‘I can’t help it if I’m talented.’
Gradually the smell faded, and people got back to work.
Logan finished a report on two indecent exposures in Trinity Cemetery — you’d have to be a brave man to wave your willy about in January in Aberdeen — then called up his internet browser and went looking for Billy Adams. 12,900,000 results in Google.
He refined the search criteria, narrowing it down to Newcastle. 358 results. Apparently there was a featherweight boxer called Billy Adams in the fifties, a guitarist with Dexys Midnight Runners in the eighties, a bunch of businessmen, some football fans…Then Logan included Knox’s name in the search.
An article from the Newcastle Evening Chronicle was top of the list: ‘MISSING OFFICER’S BODY FOUND.’
There were more links to the Newcastle Journal, News Post Leader, Sunday Sun, Morpeth Herald, and Whitley Bay News Guardian. Even a few of the national broadsheets had got in on the act. Logan clicked on the Chronicle link.
Under the headline was a photo of a blue SOC tent, the kind you put up to preserve a crime scene. It was surrounded by patchy bushes with some trees and the leg of a pylon in the background, an IB technician in protective gear walking towards the camera, carrying a black plastic box. Further down the article there was another photo: a smiling man with short blond hair, squint nose, blue eyes. According to the caption, it was ‘DETECTIVE INSPECTOR BILLY ADAMS (42)’
Apparently they’d found his body in the family Ford Mondeo on a patch of wasteland to the north of Newcastle. The story didn’t have a lot of detail on the cause of death — not surprisingly — concentrating instead on how police search teams had been looking for Adams since he’d gone missing from his home the Wednesday before. There was a quote from his wife. One from the detective inspector who’d headed up the search. Another from the young man who’d found the car. And a small potted history of DI Adams’s career. Drug seizures, three murder enquiries, one high-profile kidnapping that ended in disaster…
Logan dug the phone out from under a pile of partially completed crime reports and called Northumbria Police Headquarters.
‘Well?’ Detective Inspector Beardy Beattie’s office was crowded with box files — piled up on the carpet, the shelves, the windowsill, even the visitor’s chair. So Logan had to stand. The only place not covered in boxes was Beattie’s desk. That was covered in biscuit crumbs and paperwork.
Logan handed over the indecent exposure report. ‘He’s done it twice that we know of, probably more. Young mothers with pushchairs every time.’
Beattie sat forward, eyebrows raised. ‘Maybe he’s not flashing the mothers at all, you think of that? Maybe he’s flashing the kids!’ The DI smiled, obviously pleased with his deductive reasoning. Like a podgy Sherlock Holmes, who’d been dropped on his head as a child.
‘Don’t be daft George. He’s picking victims he knows aren’t going to chase after him. You going to abandon your baby in a graveyard to go running after some pervert who’s just shown you his dick?’
‘Oh.’ Beattie picked at a coffee stain on his new desk. ‘What about the counterfeit goods?’
‘Did you speak to Trading Standards, like I told you?’
‘I…erm…was hoping we could go over there together. You know, show a united front?’
‘Just call them, OK? We shouldn’t even be dealing with it: hookie goods is a job for the Shop Cops.’
‘Yes, but the sheer volume of-’
‘Still their job.’
‘Finnie wants us to do that Interagency Cooperation thing: us, Trading Standards and Customs.’ Beattie shuffled through some of the mess on his desk. ‘It shouldn’t take long, just a couple of hours and-’
‘You’ll have to take it up with Steel. I’ve got stuff to do for her all day.’
Beattie’s bottom lip protruded, his eyebrows pinching up in the middle. The ‘lost puppy’ look. ‘But Finnie wants to see progress.’
‘Then go get Biohazard Bob or Mark to help. Or Doreen. Eh? How about giving her some sodding work for a change instead of lumping it all on me?’
‘Fine.’ The inspector went back to his files, face turning pink. ‘I’ll call Trading Standards myself.’
Logan left him to it.
‘Bloody thing…’ DI Steel jabbed at the latch of her office window with a fork, digging the tines into the mechanism.
Logan closed the door and slumped in the visitor’s seat. ‘Tell me again why they promoted Beardy Beattie?’
‘It’s no’ safe making the windows so you can’t open the bastards more than an inch. What if there’s a fire?’
‘Useless tosser couldn’t investigate a septic tank for jobbies.’
She jabbed the fork into the catch again. ‘Give us a hand, eh?’
‘Thought you were supposed to be cutting down on the fags?’
‘This is an infringement of my human rights…Open you bastard!’
They struggled with the mechanism for a minute, before Steel managed to stab herself in the thumb with her fork. ‘Fffffffffffffffffff…’ She screwed her face up, then hurled the stainless steel thing in the bin. ‘FUCK!’ Steel slumped into her office chair and stuck her bleeding thum
b in her mouth.
‘Why can’t you go outside for a cigarette, like a normal person?’
Steel just scowled at him.
‘Whatever.’ Logan pulled out his notebook. ‘Billy Adams. AKA: Detective Inspector Billy Adams, Northumbria Police. Did a lot of anti-gang stuff, and some undercover work on a big Newcastle mobster called Maitland. Killed himself about six weeks after Knox got sent down. And I mean seriously killed himself.’
She pulled her thumb out of her mouth. ‘What the hell’s that supposed to mean?’
‘According to the sergeant I spoke to, DI Adams swallowed enough antidepressants to cheer up a whole bouncy castle full of goths, a bottle of gin, and the barrel of a shotgun.’
‘No sodding about for our Billy, then.’
‘Blew a big hole in the roof of the family Mondeo, in the grounds of some disused factory. Been there four days in the sun before they found the body. The magpies had been at him.’
Steel went back to sucking her thumb, mumbling around the digit, ‘So why’s Danby being all touchy about it?’
‘No idea.’ Logan shifted forward in his seat. ‘I went for a dig in Knox’s file too, in case there was a connection there. He’s got big chunks marked “restricted”. No details.’
‘That’ll be those other rapes Danby was waffling about. Would’ve been before the Soham murders, back when we all thought we had to be so sodding sensitive about unsubstantiated accusations going on some dirty bastard’s permanent record. Bloody Data Protection Act bollocks.’
Logan shrugged. She was probably right.
Silence.
Then she stood. ‘Get your coat, we’re off to see a man about some dodgy twenties.’
‘Nah, business is shite, truth be told.’ The man in the oil-smudged blue boilersuit spoke over his shoulder while a scabby kettle grumbled to a boil. ‘Bloody recession barely made a dent in Aberdeen, but suddenly no one wants to buy a car. You know? Hypocritical bastards.’
The office faced out onto what looked like an old cattle yard, the grey concrete floor host to a multicoloured array of second-hand cars crammed in bumper-to-bumper with ‘DEAL OF THE WEEK!!!’ signs taped to the windscreens. A couple of calendars hung on the white breezeblock walls, all featuring spanners and bits of mechanical equipment. DI Steel finished flipping through one and pulled a face, before perching herself on the edge of the battered desk. ‘Whatever happened to nudie women?’
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