Flash O' Lantern: 13+ Stories

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Flash O' Lantern: 13+ Stories Page 2

by Todd Russell


  Soon, he pulled back his coffin and crawled inside.

  October 7, 1849

  Edgar Allan Poe died of

  "acute congestion of the brain"

  wearing someone else's clothes

  Classic master of mystery and macabre, Edgar Allan Poe was born January 19, 1809 and died October 7, 1849. He is considered the inventor of detective fiction with famous tales "Murders in the Rue Morgue" and "The Purloined Letter."

  At 26, he married his 13-year-old cousin Virginia Clemm who died of consumption—today known as tuberculosis—on January 30, 1847. Poe was paid $9 for the publication of his famous poem "The Raven." Poe frequently wrote about death of women which mirrored what he experienced in his own personal relationships.

  Strangely, Poe's death remains something of a mystery as all medical records, including his death certificate, were lost. Newspapers suggested he died of "acute congestion of the brain." Another report says he disappeared for three days and was found incoherent in the gutter wearing someone else's clothes. He was taken to the hospital where he died a few days later on October 7, 1849.

  Poe was responsible for timeless short fiction like: "The Tell-Tale Heart," "The Cask of Amontillado," "The Masque of the Red Death," "The Pit And The Pendulum" and more.

  One of the things making Poe's fiction so endearing is how he wove gothic tales of mystery and horror with romance. His characters and stories were as tortured as Poe seemed to be in real life.

  Dressing up in different costumes is part of what makes Halloween, but what makes a great costume? Marnie thinks she knows . . .

  A Non-Boring Costume

  "Don't take this the wrong way," Marnie said, who was dressed as the Headless Horseman, shifting uncomfortably, "but your surgeon costume is boring."

  Muhammad agreed. He needed to add something to the blue-green scrubs. Perhaps some blood and gore? Like he'd emerged from the operating room?

  This was his third date with Marnie and he could sense the coolness developing between them. By the end of the first date they were both being more like themselves. Marnie was a strong woman with strong ideas, a Taurus too. He was a more mild-mannered Sagittarius—or so her belief in astrological signs said. She checked their horoscopes.

  No kiss after the first date.

  On the second date he'd taken her to a fancy steak restaurant. Turned out once again Muhammad had goofed. Marnie didn't like steak. She pushed a chicken breast around on the plate and complained about the service.

  And tonight Marnie invited him to the Halloween party for date number three.

  There might not be a fourth date if he didn't show a little more spunk. When he stopped to gas up the car, an idea struck him.

  As he emerged from paying for gas, he started to strip.

  "What are you doing?" Marnie asked.

  "Changing costumes."

  "What are you going as now?"

  "Tarzan." He pounded his chest making a jungle yell he'd seen in the movie.

  Marnie laughed. "That's even worse than the surgeon."

  Muhammad's cheeks flushed red. He didn't like being mocked. A third costume idea came to him.

  * * *

  "Marnie, is that you in there?" Sylvia, the person holding the Halloween party, asked.

  The Headless Horseman shook its head.

  "Do you know where Marnie is?"

  Nod. Muffled: "Like my costume?"

  "Sure. Where is Marnie?"

  Muhammad's hand emerged holding the bloody, severed head of Marnie. "Here."

  October 11, 1991

  Luby's Cafe Massacre in Killeen, Texas

  George 'Jo Jo' Hennard was responsible for the deadliest shooting rampage in America history since the 2007 Virginia Tech massacre and it all happened at a restaurant in Killeen, Texas.

  Why did Hennard barrel his 1987 Ford Ranger through the front window of Luby's cafe and start shooting people he didn't know? Witnesses heard Hennard yell it was "payback day" and "take that!"

  According to TruTV, Hennard watched a documentary about another disgruntled man, James Huberty, who went into a McDonald's and killed 21 people.

  After police arrived and exchanged gunfire, instead of being captured alive, Hennard committed suicide. The police discovered he was running low on ammunition with only twenty-eight bullets left. They are convinced that if they hadn't arrived and engaged him when they did, more than the 23 people he killed and the other 20 that he wounded would have been murdered.

  The first victim was a local veterinarian, Dr. Michael Griffith. What did he do to Hennard? He went up to the truck to try and render aid and was shot dead through the truck window.

  Disturbed, deranged people like Hennard don't deserve to be remembered.

  Luby's Cafe reopened after clean-up and redesign until going out of business in 2000. In 2011 as of this writing, it's operated as a Chinese-American buffet.

  Where is the house that Michael Myers lived in the movie Halloween (1978)? Andy and his brother Frank wondered the same thing . . .

  Website Scares

  THIS WEBSITE IS HAUNTED. DO NOT ENTER.

  "Just a picture of the original Michael Myers house," Andy said.

  "Before it was fixed up and moved across the street in Pasadena, California. A chiropractor office these days," Andy's brother, Frank, answered. They were checking out scary websites to share on Halloween.

  Andy clicked on the Myers house picture. A spoon lay on the counter with light shining through a cobweb-filled window. No young Michael Myers with butcher knife in hand, no film crew munching on donuts, nothing happening.

  "So this picture is supposed to be scary?" Andy said with a smirk and clicked the picture.

  They were in the living room next and a picture of a basket on a coffee table. The basket was empty, but the table was familiar.

  "What the—?" Andy said.

  Frank pointed. "That's our living room!"

  "No way."

  "Ok, that's weird. How did a picture of our table get on this random website?"

  Andy clicked again.

  Now they were in Frank's bedroom and there were red stripes on the wall. Like bloody fingers had slid down the wall.

  "Frank, how did that blood get on your—" Andy turned. "This is your website, isn't it?"

  "Yeah," Frank said, laughing. "Got you, bro!"

  Andy got up and left the room to go the bathroom.

  Frank grabbed the mouse and hovered over the picture. That should have been the last clickable picture.

  But it wasn't.

  The next picture was shot in their bathroom. It showed Andy with a butcher knife wearing Michael Myers' mask.

  Frank clicked.

  The next picture Andy was in their living room heading toward the kitchen.

  Click.

  Frank saw Andy's crazy eyes through the mask. "Now who's scared, brother?"

  Frank gasped, eyes widened.

  Andy lowered the knife, smiling. "Got you back. We're even."

  October 15, 1981

  The Evil Dead first debuts in theaters

  In The Evil Dead a group of friends travel to a cabin in the woods and find a tape that, once played, releases unspeakable evil. Compared to other movies discussed in Flash O'Lantern it ranks number three out of four among IMDB movie raters and higher in gore quotient (perhaps #2 behind Saw).

  1. Halloween (1978) - 7.9 / 10 with 74,000+ ratings,

  2. Saw (2004) - 7.7 / 10 with 141,000+ ratings.

  3. The Evil Dead - 7.5 / 10 with 55,000+ ratings

  4. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - 7.5 / 10 with 41,000+ ratings

  Like several other horror films, The Evil Dead release was met with controversy due to its graphic violence, blood and gory scenes. It was initially banned in Finland, Germany, Iceland, Ireland and others. The credits promise "the ultimate experience in grueling horror."

  What makes this film compelling is the dread immediately from the opening scene. The movie wastes no time delivering the spooks
and scares.

  Speaking of spooks and scares, Halloween wouldn't be complete without spiders and games. It's time to check in with Steven . . .

  The Spider Cometh

  Steven disliked spiders long before the Pin The Legs On The Spider Halloween game in first grade. He refused to leave his chair and pin the giant eighth black leg on the creature. The spider had no eyes (where were its eyes?)—only a body with legs pinned crooked.

  He slept in three blanket layers with head sandwiched between two pillows, fearful that a spider might drop from the ceiling onto him. Mom didn't understand. Dad said he'd grow out of it.

  Conversely, Steven liked two-wheel machines: bicycles and later motorcycles.

  On his eighteenth birthday, stuck in a long line of traffic, he decided to cruise up the center line. He tried crossing a narrow bridge when an oncoming black car clipped and threw him from his motorcycle. He tumbled, rolled and blacked out in the roadside grass.

  When Steven woke he could not feel his fingers, toes, legs or arms. A nurse stood over him feeding him through a plastic straw, and he couldn't taste if it was hot or cold. He could not move his mouth.

  He could only blink and see.

  And when the night fell he saw its shadow rise in the room. A huge black spider with crooked legs. It dropped down on his chest, slowly moving across his body and resting on his right leg. He saw the spider had seven legs.

  The missing eighth leg he didn't pin on it in first grade.

  It turned and had no eyes.

  It started methodically wrapping a web around his leg. And around...

  * * *

  Later that night, the nurse jumped when she saw the spider skitter across Steven's wall. She jumped again when she saw Steven's right leg was missing. The young, mute patient could only blink repeatedly.

  She started screaming after noticing Steven's eyeballs were gone.

  October 16, 1946

  Convicted Nazi leaders of main Nuremberg trial are executed

  The despicable treatment of the Jews in Nazi Germany at the command of Adolf Hitler could easily be regarded as the most heinous horror perpetrated against human beings. On October 16, 1981 ten of the Nazi leaders were hung. One took the cowardly way out and swallowed a smuggled cyanide pill.

  If there is a Hell in the afterlife, it's not difficult to imagine these SS commanders roasting there eternally.

  And what about Heaven? What decides who really goes there? Benton is about to explore this very question . . .

  Yep, Error

  Benton didn't feel a thing when the bus lost control, swerved, and hit his tractor. When Benton opened his eyes, all he saw were clouds. He looked beside him and panicked.

  "Where's my dog?"

  A short man in a white suit approached from a plume of clouds.

  "Mr. Benton, can I help you?"

  "Seems to be somethin' wrong here, sir. Missin' my dog, Yep."

  "Your dog's name is Yep, Mr. Benton?"

  "He'd done been left outside to starve. He kept scratchin' at my door. I opened it and said: 'Yep, come on in and have supper.'"

  The man studied a handheld computer screen. "Sorry, Yep is not on the list."

  "No?" Benton stared at the white pillow clouds. He remembered seeing the bus swerve, Yep bark, and then . . . here. "If this is heaven, Yep must be on the list."

  "Sorry, no," the man replied. "This is where people come before they continue on their journey."

  "Like the way station in Heaven Can Wait starring Warren Beatty? The pearl gates?"

  "Not quite. And you mean pearly gates, I think."

  "I'm not goin' without Yep. We're best friends."

  "We're on a tight schedule, Mr. Benton."

  "What did Yep do not to be here with me?"

  "Says here that Yep bit two children."

  "You mean those scoundrels that threw firecrackers at him? Recheck that computer of yours."

  The man rechecked. "Sorry, there's been an error. Yep does belong here." He pushed a button and Yep appeared and started wagging his tail and licking Benton's hand.

  "So the kids threw firecrackers at Yep while trying to escape?"

  Benton laughed as the clouds darkened and turned to smoke. "Yep trapped 'em and then I shot 'em. Their skin made good lampshades and I cooked 'em for supper."

  The gates of hell proudly opened.

  October 17, 1931

  Infamous gangster Al Capone convicted of tax evasion

  The 1920s through 1930s saw the Great Depression, prohibition and plenty of gangster activity. One prominent mob figure, Al Capone, quit school in the sixth grade at fourteen and drifted into the open arms of crime.

  The number of people Chicago mob gangster Al Capone either ordered killed or killed himself remains unknown. What ultimately brought Capone to justice wasn't murder, strangely, it was money. The government busted him for evading his taxes.

  Yes, money and murder can go hand in hand, just ask Arnold Binbrath, caretaker of the Woodhills Cemetery . . .

  Payday Assistance

  Arnold Binbrath jerked the mower across the grass, his face swathed in red. If they thought he'd keep mowing, clipping, edging and taking care of Woodhills Cemetery without paying him, they best find another sucker. Carelessly, he mowed over a grave marker. He stopped to see what grave he had mown over.

  HERE LIES BEN WATERS. GONE TOO SOON. MARCH 3, 1944 - SEPTEMBER 27, 2010.

  "Drinking to you, Ben," Arnold called as he reached into his jacket and pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels. He took a long swig and stared up at the dark, cloudy sky. The idea struck him with sudden clarity:

  The dead know.

  GONE TOO SOON applied to his paycheck. The dead knew his fat, tightwad owner, Phelps, was at the casino that very moment blowing Arnold's paycheck on some slot with a unicorn. Arnold realized the dead were talking to him through their grave marker epitaphs. Now he had a mission: mow over the epitaphs and the dead would show him the way.

  A cold wind stroked Arnold's face. He started pushing the mower again, swerving around tombstones and over grave markers. He paused for more swigs with his friend, Jack.

  SLEEPING PEACEFULLY. MARTHA WATTS.

  Martha. Ben knew after mowing this grass, he should march over to Phelps house and see his wife Martha. It was well known in Woodhills that Martha slept around. That settled it, don't pay Arnold Binbrath, and he will bang your wife. It's only fair. No pay, wife lay.

  Arnold mowed across Martha Watts' tombstone taking out bright yellow and orange Marigolds.

  Down another row he zigzagged with the mower. A rotted fist emerged four rows down on the right. The fist shook in the wind and as Arnold closed in with the mower, the middle finger raised toward him.

  "What the—?" Arnold said and then realized the dead were testing his strength. He pushed the mower toward the hand. Nobody flies the bird at Arnold Binbrath. Especially not some worm-riddled hand. He pushed the mower over the hand, laughing as the blade ripped through the small remaining flesh. At some point he looked down at the epitaph.

  I'LL BE BACK.

  Going all Terminator on me? Arnold thought, and mowed over the marker. He loved the Terminator movies but didn't like being dissed. He turned and saw more skeletal fists raised throughout Woodhills cemetery. An army of skeletons pumping their fists to him, Arnold Binbrath.

  "I just sharpened my mower blades. I'll mow you all!" Arnold cried. He moved down row three.

  NO MORE WAR. The crunch of bones under metal made a loud sound: crump-crack.

  Crump-crack. NEVER SAY DIE.

  Arnold mowed over thirteen more skeletal fists poking from the grass when fast beads of sweat started to roll down his face. Hard work chopping up skellies.

  On the seventh row he began to see more than fists emerge from the ground. Some of the dead still had flesh attached to their skulls poking from the dirt. Arnold knew he couldn't go through human skulls with his hand mower, the blades weren't sharp enough. He finished off his Jack Daniels
and took the mower back to the shed.

  Time for the riding lawn mower.

  If Phelps saw him take the riding lawn mower over grave makers he's be pissed, but Phelps was too busy button mashing unicorns. Phelps could go to hell.

  Arnold fired up the green riding mower and rolled.

  More than heads and fists had emerged from the dirt. Some whole bodies had crawled out. He would have to move fast playing Death Race 2000 with his mower. He caught the first skeleton dressed in a tie and it made a terrible grinding noise as it got sucked under the blades of the riding mower and crushed into pieces flying into the catch bag with grass and dirt.

  The dead lumbered toward him with outstretched hands, easily outnumbering Arnold. The faster he swerved to take them out, more shambled aboard the mower.

  His heart started pounding his chest as one of the dead raked across his cheek with a sharp, bony finger. He noticed that the hand contained no other fingers. He swatted the hand away but three more grabbed him. Soon they pulled him off the mower. He saw their faces, some with dripping pieces of flesh falling to the ground.

  "I didn't get paid!" Arnold screamed.

  They dragged Arnold over to a freshly dug grave site and threw him in the hole. Three half-flesh, half-skeletons followed him into the hole, holding him down as the others started to grab handfuls of dirt to cover him. One of the things bit into Arnold's leg.

  As they covered Arnold Binbrath a low, guttural moaning sound filled Woodhills cemetery.

  * * *

  As Phelps pulled into the cemetery he immediately saw the riding lawn mower atop one of the grave markers. His face flushed and he started cursing Arnold.

 

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