There’s a nervous fluttering in my stomach. I should at least be upset with him seeing as he is the reason I lost my job and home, but deep down I know that’s not the truth. “Yeah, I’m still looking for a place to stay and work,” I take a step towards number eight. “Look, I’ll see you around. We can catch up some time. I have to get going.”
I don’t wait for his reply and have to use everything I have not to run the last piece to the apartment. Only when I close the door behind me, do I take a deep breath.
I didn’t know Seth moved in there! I thought he’d let the place go. I wonder what he’s going to do with the café.
~*~
It’s been two weeks of searching for a job, but there is nothing for someone like me, someone who didn’t finish school. I’m so screwed.
Well, there are two things I could do; either stripping down town or I can become a cleaning lady at one of the hotels around here. Not exactly what I had in mind. I hope to find something at a restaurant, something similar to what I was doing at Jan’s café.
“Are you ready for tonight?” Fede asks as she comes into the living room. I toss the newspaper aside feeling frustrated. Fede raises an eyebrow. “What did the paper ever do to you?”
I sigh and fall back onto the couch that has doubled as my bed. “It’s not making a job magically appear for me, unless I want to strip.”
“I could teach you some moves,” Fede shakes her butt, and then comes to sit next to me. “Don’t worry. You know you can stay here as long as you need to.” She pats my leg. “Now go get ready, we’re having our monthly party tonight.”
“Do I have to go?” I whine.
“Oh, come on, girl,” Fede laughs and then pulls me up from the couch. “All you have to do is walk outside the door, sit in the courtyard and get drunk with us. It’s not like we’re going somewhere.”
I drag my feet as I follow Fede to her room. I’m not in the mood for people or any kind of party. I just know this night is going to suck.
~*~
Fede grabs a pizza and shoves it into my hand. She takes the other pizza and smiles innocently at me. “Candice and Dawn said they’d bring some wine. I hope it’s white wine. I hate that red stuff they brought last time. Mrs. Ferry said she’ll bring a pie. I don’t know what the Carter’s are bringing, Kelly talked to them.” She heads for the front door and calls over her shoulder. “Gemma says that new guy, Seth, is also bringing wine. Maybe he has better taste than Candice and Dawn.”
I stop walking. “What?” But Fede ignores me and slips out the door. I run after her, not happy that she’s only now telling me about Seth. “Are you sure he’s coming?”
Fede stops by the table next to the fountain and places the pizza on it. I place the pizza I’m holding next to hers and turn to face her. She shrugs as if it’s nothing. “You know the building has these meetings once a month, of course he’ll be coming. He lives here which means he has a right to attend.”
I sigh, knowing she’s right. “Why do we have these stupid meetings anyway?” I’m acting like a teenager right now, but I don’t care. I need more time to prepare myself to face Seth. I’ve been avoiding him since he said he wanted to talk to me.
“You know why we have them. It’s so everyone can complain over a glass of wine. Personally, I come for the food, but I know for a fact Mr. Ward comes to complain, or maybe he’s just checking out Mrs. Ferry,” Fede says giggling. “He loves her pie!” She starts to laugh at her own joke.
One by one everyone comes out of their apartments. Soon most of the tenants are seated around the fountain, talking about the week they’ve had. Everyone but Seth and Candice.
“You’re kidding,” I hear Candice laugh. I glance over my shoulder and I’m stunned to see her walking with Seth. I didn’t even know that they knew each other, but then again, they are neighbors so it would be expected.
Seth’s eyes catch mine and I quickly look away. I’m so glad I’m seated between Gemma and Mrs. Ferry. When I hear chairs scraping over the ground, my eyes flit up. I watch as Candice moves her chair closer to Seth’s. She leans into him and starts to introduce him to the tenants he hasn’t met yet.
“Have you met Lacey, she’s our resident ghost,” Candice says and then laughs.
I glare at my hands, deciding to ignore her.
“Why is Lacey the resident ghost?” Gemma asks next to me, her voice carrying a biting tone.
“We know she lives here somewhere, but we never see her,” Candice says. “Except that one night I saw her going up to the roof, other than that she keeps to herself.”
“Did you make your famous apple pie,” I hear Mr. Ward ask Mrs. Ferry. I hear Fede laugh under her breath, and just like that the tension is broken.
I listen to the various conversations, choosing to ignore Candice.
After a while everyone gets up to get a plate of eats. I just want this night to be over already.
A glass of wine appears in front of me and when I look up, Seth is standing there holding the glass out to me. “Aren’t you going to eat?”
I take the wine and gulp down a sip before I answer, “I’m not that hungry. I had something earlier.”
He takes Gemma’s seat and I stop the groan building up inside of me just in time. “Is it just me or are you avoiding me?” Wow he’s direct!
I take another sip of wine and shake my head. “I’m not avoiding you. I’m just busy.”
“With what?” he asks leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees. He holds his glass of wine between his fingers, twirling it.
I can’t help but notice how handsome he is. He was good looking when we went to school together, but now he’s just gorgeous. The old familiar feelings I had for him flutter in my chest.
“I …” I clear my throat when it comes out squeaky, “I’m looking for work. I can’t live with the girls forever.”
“Then why did you move out? Why did you stop working at the café without so much as a word?”
My jaw drops to the ground. “Because it’s yours!” I snap.
I get up not ready to have this fight with him, and I start to walk away. “So you leave it all because of me? What the hell did I ever do to you?”
I don’t answer him at first, taking a few more steps. Then I stop and as I swing around the wine splashes all over me. It only causes my temper to explode and I don’t care who hears me. “You kissed her!” I shout. “I loved you, Seth. I let you kiss me and straight after that you went and kissed Paige!” A sob builds up in my throat and makes my voice hoarse. “I thought you liked me as much as I liked you.” The stupid sob escapes and I hic-up on it. “I thought you were the one person I could trust back then. You broke my heart and somehow that was worse than what your dad did to me. He wasn’t the one that broke me, you were!”
I watch Seth’s face turn pale. When he gets up and takes a step toward me I shake my head. “Don’t even try. I’m over it. I just don’t want to be reminded of it every day.”
I turn around and run to the apartment, ready to take that stripping job if it means I can get away from here.
I go to the bathroom and I wet a cloth. I try my best to get the red wine out of my shirt.
Suddenly I’m plunged in darkness, as the light goes out.
I reach out in front of me and try to make my way to the living room. I keep the flashlight next to the couch and I’ll be okay if I can reach it. I need the light!
I keep to the wall, but it’s so dark! I bump into something and I let out a frightful shriek. The sound of my own scream echoes in my ears and I lose it. I lose the last bit of strength I had.
I drop to my knees as the darkness crushes me. I hear a dripping sound and it becomes louder and louder, until it’s all I hear.
~*~
Chapter Thirty-Six
Seth~
I’m stunned out of my mind. Lacey saw me on the beach with Paige and thought I kissed her. She didn’t see me push Paige away?
Her words hit hard, f
inding just the right spots to stab at. I’m about to go after her when the lights go out, enveloping us all in darkness.
“Oh no,” Candice gasps.
“Not again!” Mr. Ward complains. “When are they going to fix the wiring?”
I take out my phone to shine some light around me. When I hear a shriek, my heart jolts in my chest. Lacey! Shining the dim light in front of me, I quickly move to the apartment she’s in. When I walk in the door, I let the light move over the furniture, looking for Lacey. I don’t see her and walk towards the hallway. “Lacey!” I call out, but there’s no answer.
My foot hooks on something and when I look down I see a foot being yanked away from me. Lacey scrambles across the floor until she slams into the back of the kitchen counter.
“Lacey,” I say, keeping my tone gentle. I move slowly to where she’s cowering against the counter. I remember that time I found her in the store room. She must be scared of the dark! I put my phone away and kneel down in front of her. She makes that same whimpering sound she did the last time and again it tears at my heart. I take hold of her arms and pull her to me. Her body is trembling so badly, I’m afraid she’ll shake apart.
Her body starts to jerk and I grab my phone to shine some light on her. Her mouth is open, as if caught in a silent scream, but then I see the tears streaking down her face. She tries to gasp for breath, making a horrible choking sound. She grabs at her chest and that’s when I realize the panic attack is so bad that she can’t breathe!
“Lacey,” Her name is an urgent whisper, “you need to calm down.” I feel like an idiot as soon as I say the words. I pick her up and let her sit on the counter. I cradle her face in my hands and lean in close to her. “Shh … you’re safe.”
I wish the lights would go on! The light keeps dimming on my phone, plunging us back into darkness.
Lacey keeps making the strangled sounds. Not knowing what else to do, I wrap my arms around her and hold her as tight as I can. “You’re safe. Please breathe.” Then I remember that one day I choked on some water. Mom told me to breathe through my nose. “Breathe through your nose,” I say urgently, hoping she’ll listen.
Her hands dig into my shirt and I watch as she struggles to take a breath through her nose. “Again, Sweetheart. Try again,” I whisper. She manages a full breath and then sobs again. “That’s my girl, take another one. You’re doing great.”
She manages another few breaths, all the while clinging to my shirt.
The lights suddenly flicker on, and Lacey closes her eyes against the bright light, another whimper slipping through her lips. I pick her up and hold her close to my chest. “We’re going to my place. I’m not leaving you alone.”
She doesn’t say anything. She just holds onto me.
I carry her past the crowd still standing by the fountain. “What happened?” One of the girls calls out.
“She’s just scared of the dark. Nothing happened,” I say too harshly, but I couldn’t be bothered right now. Calming Lacey and making her feel safe is all I want right now.
~*~
I manage to open the door and as soon as we’re in, I kick it closed behind us. I flip on the light and go sit on the couch with Lacey on my lap.
For a long moment I just hold her, my mind racing with a million thoughts. Lacey needs help, she can’t go on like this!
I hate that man for taking her, for hurting her like this.
“I’m so sorry, Lacey.” I lean my cheek on top of her head and take in the flowery smell that always hangs around her like a soft cloud. She still smells the same. She still feels the same in my arms. I don’t think - I just start to talk. “I hate him for what he did to you and Mom. I don’t know if you heard, but he was sentenced. The judge said they should lock him up and throw away the key. I hope they did.”
“What did he do to your mom?” I hear her small voice.
I thought she knew. I mean, everyone knew all of it. My life was public knowledge. “She was his first victim. He killed her. For the longest time I thought she just left, until he was caught. Aunt Janice is my mom’s sister, she always believed something happened to mom, but I was too young to understand. I was so absorbed in myself.”
Lacey pulls away from me, but stays on my lap. She takes a shuddering breath, looking down at her hands. Her face is red and puffy, but she’s still so beautiful. “Don’t do that, Seth,” she whispers. “Don’t blame yourself for what he did.”
Anger for Dad and what he did flares hot through me. “But I should’ve seen the signs! I could’ve found you sooner if only I opened my eyes.”
She shakes her head and she finally looks up at me. “You were seventeen. We were seventeen! We were only kids. I shouldn’t have gone with him, but…” she drops her eyes back down, “I was so in love with you back then and I wanted him to approve of me.”
I realize that if Lacey didn’t know me she wouldn’t have gone with Dad. “It’s because of me he took you. If you didn’t know me, you wouldn’t have gone near him.”
Her eyes turn wild. “No, Seth! I saw your dad a lot while I waited for the bus in the morning, and whenever I walked past your RV. He would’ve taken me whether we knew each other or not. You had nothing to do with it.”
I smooth some of her hair back and see the truth in her eyes. She really doesn’t blame me for what happened! “I didn’t kiss Paige,” I blurt out.
She frowns lightly and I see a look of hurt flash over her face. “I saw you. I saw her kiss your cheek and then you hugged. I saw her lean in for the kiss.”
“And I pulled away. I told her I was with you,” I smile sadly. “I left her there and went back to your RV to tell you how I felt, that I wanted us to be together.” I see the sadness creep into her eyes and I drop my forehead against hers. “But you were gone.”
~*~
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Lacey~
I can’t handle all these emotions swamping me. Seth came back for me? He didn’t kiss her! He wanted to be with me?
“Have you seen your parents?” Seth asks, his hand moves up and down my back in gentle circles.
“I wanted them to be happy again. I really believed that if I left they could be happy again.” I look up at Seth, hoping to find some answers in his eyes. “I went back a couple of times. I watched them from a distance. They don’t look happy. I was seventeen, Seth. I was stupid and I was hurting. I thought running away would solve all my problems.” I sigh heavily. “But it didn’t.”
Seth takes hold of my hand and lifts it to his chest. “You know what I think?”
I shake my head, begging him with my eyes to tell me what to do.
“I think you should go see them. I think you should start to deal with everything,” Seth’s right, but then he says, “and I think you should get help.”
“No!” The word bursts from my lips. “I’m not going to see someone. I’ll deal with it in my own way. I can’t,” I start to stutter, my heart leaping to my throat, “I can’t talk to a stranger!”
“Okay,” he says quickly, taking both of my hands in his, “you don’t’ have to talk to a stranger.” His thumbs caress the back of my hands and it’s soothing. “Talk to me then. Let me try to help you.”
Seth would be the perfect person to talk to. He suffered through it all, as well.
~*~
“I’m so scared of the dark,” I say softly, embarrassed to admit the fear to him.
Seth lifts a hand to my cheek. His eyes are warm on mine. He’s just about to say something when there’s a knock at the door. His head snaps up and he glares at the door. I slip off his lap and take a step back. “It might be one of the girls,” I say quickly, feeling like I got caught red-handed doing something I shouldn’t be doing.
My cheeks flush red and I look everywhere but at Seth. He gets up and brushes his fingers lightly over my cheek. “I missed that,” he whispers. There’s another knock and I swear I can hear a growl come from Seth as he goes to open the door.
“Wh
en are you coming back?” I hear Candice whine. She walks in and her eyes land on me. “She looks all better.” She takes hold of Seth’s arm and pulls on it. “Come on back.”
Looking everywhere again but at them, I say, “I should be going. Thank you for tonight, Seth.”
I start to walk towards the door when Seth’s voice slices through the apartment. “Lacey, stay right where you are!” I stop and look at him with wide eyes. He’s never taken that tone with me before. “Candice, I’m not coming back. You go have fun with your friends.” He pushes a very stunned Candice out the door. “Have a good night,” he says and then he closes and locks the door.
I’m very aware of the fact that he just locked the door with me in the apartment. He turns around and I take a step back from the intense look in his eyes. “Seth?” My voice is too soft, giving away how fragile my nerves feel right now.
“You’re not going anywhere,” he growls and then he starts to stalk in my direction. My heart leaps and my mouth dries right up. I’ve never seen that look on his face before. He walks right up to me, slips one hand behind my neck and tilts my face up. His mouth crashes onto mine.
My mind stops racing, my heart stops beating, and my lungs stop breathing. Every one of my senses zooms into the feel of Seth’s lips on mine.
Then he pulls back and I’m flushed with confusion and embarrassment. What’s going on? Being around him is like being on a rollercoaster!
His eyes search mine and then his lips tug up in the one corner, into the sexiest smile I’ve ever seen. “I just wanted to make sure I saw right,” he murmurs.
“Saw what?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
He brings his other hand up to my face and with the back of his fingers, he caresses softly over my flushed cheeks. “This blush. It’s one of the first things I saw that I loved about you, and one of the first things I missed.”
He ducks his head and I pull away. I don’t know why I pull away. It’s too soon? Isn’t it?
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