by Kit Tunstall
Suddenly, Rafe issued a sound eerily like his bear counterpart as his cock hardened further before it twitched inside her. Seconds later, his release painted her insides and triggered her own.
As the wave of her orgasm crested, he bent his head, and his teeth raked across her shoulder. Instead of tempering her ecstasy, the flash of discomfort only fueled her pleasure, increasing the intensity of her orgasm as she shook and shuddered underneath him.
It was only several moments later, when she came down from the emotional high of sexual release, that she curled against him and remembered his bite. “When you bit me at the end, was that the marking thing you were talking about?”
He nodded. “Yes. That marks you with my pheromones and lets other male bear-shifters know you’ve been claimed as my mate. It will protect you, and it’s also some pure macho bullshit that goes back to ancient days of territorialism.” He grinned and winked. “Bears occasionally share their mates, usually due to lack of females, but bear-shifters aren’t generally so open to the idea. When it comes to our mates, we’re possessive and don’t usually like to share.”
She arched brow, intrigued by the idea of a bear ménage. “Polyamory is accepted in your culture?”
He laughed. “My culture is basically the same as yours, sweetheart, with just a few more complexities. But, yes, it’s okay for triads or more to be out among bear-shifter communities, though as I said, it’s relatively rare. Usually, it’s confined to just brothers or very close friends who share a woman.”
“How does that work with babies? Do they know who the father is?” Suddenly, Breanna groaned. “Oh no.”
“What?” He had stiffened, the hair on his body bristling as though he was preparing for attack. “What’s wrong?”
She shook her head. “It’s just that I’m not using any birth control, and you definitely didn’t either.”
His eyes sparkled, and he sounded gruff, but lovable, when he said, “Nothing would make me happier than to see you round with my cubs, even though it’s early in the relationship.” He closed his eyes and brought his face close to her stomach before inhaling deeply. “You don’t appear to be fertile at the moment.”
Breanna’s mouth fell open. “You can tell that just by smelling me?”
He shrugged. “It’s not one hundred percent, but it’s pretty accurate, especially the closer you get to ovulation. When we’re ready to have cubs…babies…it should be easy to conceive.”
Part of her tingled with excitement at the thought of bearing his children, but she couldn’t deny she was also fearful of the prospect. “Will our babies really be cubs? Will they be born looking like bears?” That was too much for her to accept, let alone embrace.
He shook his head again. “No, the shifter gene doesn’t usually kick in until puberty, when it goes from dormant to active. In the meantime, our kids will appear to be as human as you are. They’ll still have certain bear characteristics, of course, but the actual ability to shift won’t be there from the start. It comes later.”
“That’s somewhat reassuring. I couldn’t imagine breast-feeding if they had little bear teeth.” He laughed along with her, and she relaxed in his arms. There was still a lot to work out, and she had to know more about him, but as he lifted and carried her to the bed before joining her in it, she was certain she was where she was supposed to be. Wrapped in Rafe’s arms, as she drifted off to sleep, she had no doubt he was her mate.
***
Sometime in the middle of the night, she woke with music thundering in her head. He was still asleep, so she slipped out of bed in search of anything she could use to record the notes darting through her brain. She often composed music mentally, but it never came this easily, and she never wrote it down. There had been no reason to do so.
After her parents had deemed her musical talent a waste, since she had no intention of using it publicly, she had kept it locked away inside herself. She hadn’t touched a piano in four years, but her fingers itched to do so now.
She couldn’t believe her luck when she entered his den and saw a small electric keyboard on one of the shelves. It was no baby grand, but it would do.
Breanna was even more delighted to learn it had a record function, and she pressed it before she began to play. She hadn’t formally composed the music, but it flowed from her easily, as though each note was inserting itself into her mental sheet music before her fingers could play it.
It was a beautiful piece, with hunting moments, highlighted by happier notes. She didn’t have a title for it, and it might never see light-of-day, but when the music had ceased to flow through her, she was satisfied with what she had produced. Considering she hadn’t played in four years, and she hadn’t composed music other than in her brain for even longer, the sated, pleasantly exhausted feeling sweeping over her was a welcome sensation.
Rafe had given her back the music. Her new outlook and hope for the future had restored her ability to play. She would never fill concert halls, because she was too shy to be confident in front of crowds, but she could play.
She could have always played, but her parents had stifled that when she hadn’t used her gifts the way they had deemed appropriate. Her cherished dream of being a piano teacher had been insignificant to the Dawsons, and she had let them steal it from her.
That realization left her sad. How could she have been so meek? New freedom swelled in her, reinforcing the determination she had made the right choice fleeing from her parents’ household and her arranged marriage to Richard.
Empty of the music that had flowed through her brain until she had woken to free it, she returned to the bed and curled against Rafe, pleasantly sated in more than one way. The emotional bliss of finding her music again almost rivaled the physical bliss Rafe’s lovemaking inspired.
Chapter Six
It took eight days for the snow to stop falling, and she spent those days falling ever deeper in love with her mate. They filled the time with loving, but also a lot of talking. She learned about his life as CEO of a small tech firm in Seattle, and she shared some details of her life, though she omitted the broken engagement. It was wrong to hide it, but she was embarrassed by how she had handled the situation.
The more they learned about each other, the closer they became.
That evening, they were wrapped in a comforter in front of the living room fireplace, trading kisses as they shared a bottle of wine. She leaned closer to Rafe, putting her head on his shoulder. “I could get used to this life.”
She snuggled closer. “It’s so different from my life in California, but that’s a good thing. It has none of the fake bullshit the people there feel like they have to project, and I’m not pressured to conform, to lose weight, and to be perfect all the time. Living here in your cabin is pretty amazing.”
Rafe wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer. “It is amazing here, and I come during the winter months since it’s the closest thing to hibernation I can find. It’s not practical for the CEO of a company just take off and sleep for ten weeks out of the year.”
She laughed softly. “No, I suppose it isn’t. It would be hard to maintain your company that way.” Breanna tipped her head sideways, so she could see his face better. “How does that work? Do you do everything from your computer?”
“Mostly. In the fifteen years I’ve been coming here to the cabin, I’ve rarely had to return to Seattle before my pseudo-hibernation is over. It’s happened a few times, and when it does someone usually sends the company helicopter for me. I can be back in the city within two hours if I absolutely have to be. Otherwise, I enjoy the solitude and the winter snow, embracing my bear nature in a way I can’t living in the city. It’s stifling there sometimes.”
She nodded. “Like you’re barely breathing, but you don’t realize you’re being suffocated until you get away from that and can take a deep breath.” Her words were a metaphor, but not just for his situation. They were spot-on the life she had left behind in California.
> Breanna hadn’t realized just how stifling it had been to live with her parents and always try to win their approval until she had fled and given up the attempt. It was liberating to no longer have to worry so much about how she looked, how she thought, how she spoke, or what she did.
There wasn’t anyone from her old life that she really missed aside from Lupita. How pathetic was that? She had spent so long trying to win the approval of the people who’d given her life, and now she was relieved to be away from them instead of missing them. It was like she had wasted the last twenty-four years. A small shudder ran through her at the thought, and she suppressed the urge to cry.
Perhaps his bear senses allowed him to tune in to her emotions, because he seemed to realize she had entered a sad state. His hand was soothing on her back, and his embrace was comforting without being sexual. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
She sniffed a couple of times and swallowed thickly before she could answer, determined not to cry. “I guess I just realized how much of my life I wasted trying to please people who are never going to be happy with me. I love my parents, but I don’t think they feel the same way. I could never make them happy, even with my music. I don’t know why I’ve tried for so long. I guess I’m just pathetic.”
He growled softly, he and his bear clearly not liking her words. In one smooth motion, he flipped her so she sat on his lap, his hands cupping her face so she couldn’t look away from him. “You aren’t pathetic. Just the sexiest, most amazing woman I’ve ever met, and you’re my mate. Everything that’s happened to you and me has happened to bring us to this point. We can’t change the past, but we can embrace the future.”
Her lips trembled, and this time the tears she wanted to cry came from happiness rather than sadness. Determined not to let them fall either, she sniffed a couple of times again before leaning forward to kiss him slowly. “We do have a future, don’t we?” she asked as she pulled away slightly.
“We have whatever kind of future you want, Breanna. If you don’t want to go back to the city, we’ll stay here forever. I have enough money that we can have this life, and I could walk away from the company.”
She shook her head, her chest tight at the thought. “No, I wouldn’t do that to you. I definitely like your cabin, and I can certainly envision spending weeks here at a time, but you’re not giving up your dream for me. I know what that’s like, and I won’t let you do that.”
His eyes were soft, and he kissed her again gently before speaking once more. “The company isn’t exactly my dream. It was my dad’s, and I’m just running it since he’s retired. I enjoy it, but it isn’t something I’m passionate about.” His eyes shadowed. “Which dream did you give up and for whom?” There was an underlying growl in his words, and he was clearly angry at the thought of someone forcing her to do that.
She hesitated, wondering for a moment if it would color his opinion of her parents should they ever meet. Then she decided it didn’t matter, because her parents were capable of making their own bad impression, just as he was capable of determining what they were like all on his own. He was too strong to let her influence him.
“I was an average child, just like I’m an average adult. I made okay grades, but I didn’t stand out. The only area where I have any real talent is with music. I’ve been playing the piano since I was little, and I could pick up a tune without any training.
“My parents lavished lessons on me to prepare me for Juilliard and a career in music. I learned a lot in the two years they let me stay at Juilliard, including the fact I would never be able to perform in concert halls. Stage fright paralyzes me, and the music won’t come when I’m facing others. Small groups are fine, but I could never do large concerts.”
He scowled. “So? That doesn’t mean you can’t use music in other ways.”
She nodded, wholeheartedly agreeing, though her parents didn’t. “To their way of thinking, that was another failure, so they forced me to drop out of Juilliard. I could have stayed and try to go it alone, but I had no way to pay for it. Student loans wouldn’t even begin to cover the tuition, and what would be the point? I’d end up doing something behind-the-scenes and probably with low pay, so why did I need a degree from Juilliard for that?”
He bared his teeth slightly, clearly grinding them to keep in angry words—words directed at her parents that she imagined would be fitting. As soon as she stroked his shoulder, his agitation eased, though his eyes remained shadowed. “I’m sorry. You had the right to finish school and do whatever you wanted with your life.”
Breanna managed a small smile. “Oh, I finished college. They would be terribly ashamed of a dropout, but to punish me for my weakness, they sent me to state college instead. I actually liked UCLA, and that’s where I met my friend Grace. Now I have a useless degree in music that I don’t use, parents who will never approve of me, and a directionless future until I met you. Somehow, none of that matters now that I have you.”
“I’m happy to hear that, but you should find a way to use your music when we return to the city, if that’s what you want to do.” They kissed again, this time not as gently. His mouth moved over hers, tongue sweeping inside to plumb the depths of her mouth. She met each stroke of his with her own tongue, determined not to be a passive participant.
Because they were naked under the comforter, a side effect of previous lovemaking, it required little effort to wiggle down his lap, pushing on his shoulders in the process. He laid down on the carpet, his stomach muscles contracting under her palm as she steadied herself to bring her mouth near his erection. She had yet to taste him, and she worried she wouldn’t be very good at it. Her previous attempts with other partners had been lackluster, and the inconsiderate men she had been with hadn’t hesitated to tell her.
Forcing herself to proceed, she bolstered her courage and wrapped her mouth around his shaft. He would like whatever she did to him, she reminded himself. He had so far. He seemed just as enamored with her and her body as he had the first day they had made love. He seemed to want her forever, so even if she performed an inadequate blowjob, she would have plenty of time to hone her skills.
Fortunately, passion kicked in, and her own need easily swept away the voice of doubt inside her mind that always held her back. For the first time ever, she enjoyed giving her lover oral pleasure as she tightened her mouth and bobbed up and down on him, gently massaging his testicles with her fingers as he groaned and grunted. It didn’t take long before she could feel him trembling on the edge of release, and he sat up abruptly.
The rough side of him came out to play, and he rolled her over until she was on her stomach. Breanna let out a little yelp, but it was one of excitement instead of fear as he grasped her hips and lifted her buttocks into the air. A second later, his cock slid inside her heated folds, and her sheath contracted tightly around him. She was accustomed his size now, and both rough and gentle possession from him, depending on his need level, so her body welcomed her mate easily.
He held her hips in a hard grasp as he pushed in and out of her, his frantic urgency feeding hers and fueling her own arousal. She clutched handfuls of the comforter, using it as a makeshift pillow to steady herself as she arched backward in an attempt to match his deep, rapid thrusts.
They were making love fast and frantically, but each stroke of his erection in and out of her provided the perfect stimulation against her clit, and she came seconds before he did, letting out a small cry of release that his bellow of satisfaction blotted out.
She giggled into the comforter, unable to believe how much she loved the rough, bear-influenced side of him. He could be smooth and sophisticated, sweet and tender, or rugged and wild. He was the perfect combination of everything she could ever want or need in a mate.
To think she had nearly settled for something that was a pale imitation, that she had almost married Richard to please her parents, made her stomach churn with nausea. Even if she had never questioned her decision before—which she had for months�
�there was no way she could ever go through with such a match after seeing how love should be.
***
Sounds of helicopter blades woke them early the next morning. The sun was barely over the horizon when the whomp, whomp, whomp of the engine grew closer and closer. Rafe was immediately alert, jumping from the couch where they had ended up sleeping, too tired to go farther after hours of lovemaking.
She followed a moment later, stifling a yawn. Having looked forward to sleeping in, the interruption of the helicopter was unwelcome, even if it meant she could get back to civilization. Her heart dropped at the thought, because she had no desire to go anywhere away from Rafe or his cabin.
“I wonder what they need you for?” she asked as she wrapped the comforter around her and followed Rafe to the door.
He had paused briefly to shrug on jeans and his coat before shoving his feet into boots. “I don’t know, but it’s unusual for them to just show up without emailing or calling first.”
She chuckled softly. “I’m not sure cell service has been restored, and you have to admit we’ve been pretty busy. Too busy to check email or even hear the ping notifying us of a new message.”
He chuckled as well before his amusement turn to grimace. “They’d better not expect me to go back to the city, no matter how urgent the issue. There’s no way I’m tearing myself away from you right now.”
Her heart leapt with joy, and she knew whether or not Rafe went, she would be at his side. If she caught a ride on the helicopter back to Seattle with him, she wouldn’t be going any farther than his home.
She hadn’t yet told him she loved him, and he hadn’t uttered the words either. It felt too new and fragile, perhaps even a little crazy, to be falling in love so early in their relationship, so she held back. She hoped his reasons were similar, rather than he was doubting his bear’s insistence she was his mate.