“What was it like? I heard the valley was—bad.”
“Bad is a word for it.” Jenna shook her head and chuckled. “I’ll never forget getting off the helo that first night and having to take cover because the Taliban was trying to pick us off. The camp was maybe a couple weeks old. We were there to replenish the men they’d lost digging in and all I could get behind was this dirt mound. I was so scared. It was the first time I wasn’t just the medic. Anyway, eventually they went away. We didn’t have a big shelter, so I laid on a cot inside the camp and—I didn’t know it then, but they have these howling monkeys. I thought the damn monkeys were the Taliban, and they were coming back for us. I just laid there thinking, what have I done? I’m going to die here.”
“And in 2010 they abandoned the valley.”
“Yup. Right after they yanked us out of there.”
“The Valley of Death. What a waste.”
“I can’t think of it like that.” Jenna propped her chin up in her hand and forced herself to look at Sterling. To see a living, breathing person instead of the mangled bodies that had littered those months.
“How can you not? We put the Taliban down and now we have ISIS. Once they’re gone, who will be next? There will be another group with another cause. It’s an unending waste of life. At least you fix people. I just...killed them.”
“No, you protected them.”
“Doesn’t feel like that. That’s not what I see when I close my eyes or when—when my head goes back there.”
Jenna reached across the table and gripped Sterling’s hand, willing her to feel the connection to here and now. Sterling squeezed her back, holding on tight.
“What happened?” Jenna pitched her voice low.
Sterling swallowed and blinked several times as if she were staving off tears.
“We were attacked. I’d just been moved up to this camp. We were supposed to take the local police under our wing, teach them, patrol the town. I was in the barracks asleep when it started. I got my boots and vest on before they were on us. It was...we were fish in a barrel. They tore through us. I was at the end of this hall in a weird, off shoot, which is the only reason I think they left me. If they’d come down that far they could be boxed in. Me and a couple of guys chased them out, but...it was a massacre.”
Jenna’s mouth dried up. The camp name escaped her, but she’d heard about it. The lives lost. She’d known those people. And they were gone. No wonder she’d never seen them again.
“I held my shit together for a while. They shipped me back, pushed me through all the docs and put me back out there again. I get why...but...I wasn’t ready.” Sterling shook her head a bit, maybe to loosen the memories.
Names and faces scrolled through Jenna’s mind. Those MPs, they’d patrolled around her little hospital at Camp Bastion. They’d been friends. Jenna, Sterling and another woman, a translator named Karri, had played innumerable games of poker, taking the men for everything in their pockets. Karri was dead. And so were the others. All those people.
“Anyway, they sent me back once the flashbacks started happening. I was sleep walking, with my fucking rifle, so I can’t fault them. Two weeks ago I had a flashback so bad I...I grabbed my mom. I thought she was—I didn’t see her. She wasn’t my mom, she was someone else...”
Oh, God.
Jenna squeezed Sterling’s hand so tight the woman’s knuckles turned white.
“I didn’t hurt her. But I almost did. I left, wandered around a bit. Cop picked me up because mom and dad called it in. I asked them to take me to a hospital that wasn’t in Grapevine, somewhere farther away. So they took me to Sundance, and I checked myself in.”
“That’s good. You stopped yourself and you got help. Those are good signs.”
“Yeah, but what about next time it happens?”
“Why did you join the MPs? What was the reason you told me?”
Sterling chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Because all the Kuhns join the army.”
“And?”
“And I didn’t want to join the army to kill people. I wanted to protect them. So I opted to be an MP, so I’d protect the people fighting for this country.”
“That’s who you are.”
Sterling sucked in a shuddering breath and pulled her hand out of Jenna’s to swiped under her eyes.
“Shit, these people are going to think we’re girlfriends,” she muttered.
“Want to kiss and give them something to talk about.”
“Shut up.” Sterling threw the sugar packet at her. “You like dick.”
“I do, but I could like kissing girls. Who knows?”
“You dating yet?”
“That’s...a complicated question.” Jenna buried her face in her hands.
“Come on, tell me the good stuff.”
“God, Sterling, it’s bad. It’s real bad.” She dropped her hands to her lap.
“Bad?” She frowned and straightened, giving Jenna That Look. The one that said Sterling was about to kick someone’s ass. She hadn’t been made Staff Sergeant for nothing.
“Not that kind of bad. I mean...” Jenna sighed. “I’m a paramedic. Well, Ransom’s SWAT includes tactical medics.”
“Fuck. You’ve got to be kidding me?”
“I’m not. I couldn’t pass that up.” Jenna leaned forward. “It’s scary but—there’s no adrenaline rush like being shot at.”
“I know, you crazy bitch. So who is he?”
“He’s the Team Leader of the unit I work with.” Jenna covered her face with her hands again and peaked between her fingers. “It’s against the rules. We aren’t supposed to date, and we kind of aren’t. We’re mostly sleeping with each other. It’s a couple days old, but—oh man. You remember that pilot? The super sexy one that would do pull ups on his jet?”
“You mean the one I fucked?”
“You did?”
“You didn’t know?”
“No!”
“Shit, you must have left. Yeah, we hooked up—three times? Best God damned sex of my life.”
“Okay, bad analogy.”
“What?”
“I was going to say his body was like his, but better.”
“It’s possible, but you never got your hands on that pilot.”
“And you’ve never seen Alex.” Jenna’s cheeks were on fire, but damn, she didn’t care. Sterling was the one person she could tell without fear of repercussion.
“True. So, is this just hook-up sex, or what?”
“I don’t know. He’s not...he’s not hook-up material, you know? I’ve had it bad for him since we met, but I’ve been such a train wreck and busy with work and SWAT that—what the hell would he want with someone like me? But...I think we’re waiting and seeing. In a week, is he over the sex and ready to move on? Or is one of us leaving SWAT?”
“You can’t just keep it between yourselves?”
“Ransom is too small for that. We might have blown our cover last night, anyway. He gets crazy jealous.”
“Uh-ho.”
“Not bad like. I get where he’s coming from, so I’m willing to cut him some slack right now, but we can’t keep going like this. I won’t put up with it and he’s too much of a rule follower to lie for much longer.”
“What’s standing in your way?”
“He’s the best commanding officer I’ve ever worked with. If they lose him, they’re losing a real asset. If they lose me, they’re losing a medic that not only knows how to work under fire, but can handle herself if it comes to that.”
“They let you carry?”
“No, but I don’t always need a gun, you know?”
“Ha, I remember how you took Aaronson to the ground. No, you don’t need a gun to kick someone’s ass. God, Aaronson was an asshole. I loved watching you mop the floor with him.” Sterling wiped tears of a different nature from her eyes, the shit-eating grin splitting her face.
This was the woman Jenna remembered. The take-no-bull Staff Sergeant who had all the men f
irmly under her thumb.
“I hope this works out for you. One of us should be happy, and no man is going to take a chance on me.” Sterling shrugged, but her disposition was different, changed since they walked through the diner doors.
“Don’t say that. Alex doesn’t know what he’s in for with me. It could all go south.”
“You’re a tough cookie. You’ll be okay. How’s the head?”
“Doc said I need sleeping pills.” She rolled her eyes.
“Lack of sleep makes you do some fucked up shit.”
“I know, but it’s more than that.”
“How much did you sleep last night?”
“Eight—nine hours.”
“How’s today compared to a week ago?”
“...Better.”
“Because Alex is fucking your brains out or what?”
“Shut up. Okay, so sleep might play into it somewhat, but I have a hard time believing that’s all it is.”
“It’s never all it is. None of us who come home are all right in the head, we just hold it together.” Sterling nodded at her. “Some better than others.”
“Yeah. Maybe.” The clock on Jenna’s phone buzzed, reminding her she had SWAT practice in an hour. She silenced it and frowned at the time. “Damn, we talked about me this whole time.”
“I’m okay with that.”
“We never even got pie.”
“Because I need more weight on these hips.”
“Shut up. No one cares what you weigh anymore.” Jenna left a couple bills on the table for their drinks and nonexistent service.
They meandered out of the diner and into the sweltering heat.
“Maybe I should move somewhere colder. Maybe the heat is what’s triggering me.” Sterling grinned and winked at Jenna.
“Maybe. Hey, we should do this again.”
“I’d like to.” This time, it was Sterling who leaned in for the hug, squeezing Jenna tight.
“Want to do this again next week? Maybe a different time though.”
“Sure. I’m flexible.”
“Great. Call me if you need me, and I’m serious about that spare room.” It would need to be cleaned up and Sterling would need a bed, but those were minor details. Stuff that could be fixed.
“Will do. See ya.”
They parted, each to their respective vehicles.
Jenna climbed into hers without pausing to think about the threat of a stalker. She only realized it after she buckled in that she should have checked things out.
Had the car been locked?
Yes.
Was it where she’d left it?
Again, yes.
It had to be okay. She was miles from Ransom. If she had a stalker which Alex and her shrink seemed to believe, then they would have had to come a long way to follow her here. But how would they know where she was? She hadn’t been to her house in days, and so far Alex’s place was safe.
She gave herself a little shake and started the car before she baked herself. They had dress rehearsal for tonight’s op and plenty of ground to cover before they took the bad guys down. Essentially, better stuff to think about than her possible stalker.
What was that smell?
Yuck, it was bad.
Jenna wrinkled her nose, but couldn’t pause to look for the source of the repugnant odor. Chances were, the mechanic stepped in something that was now on the upholstery. She’d have to take it to get cleaned, which was a good idea, anyway. She added it to her list of things to do in her spare time and glanced in the back seat. Her gear sat ready and waiting.
The one nice thing about operational practice runs? She got to spend hours with Alex watching her backside.
15.
ALEX DROPPED HIS SHIELD onto the tailgate and tugged off his helmet. The others were similarly peeling their gear off, dousing their heads in water and hydrating while they could. Jenna handed around extra bottles of water, doing her best to keep them all in tip-top shape. He forced his gaze away from her, to keep his attention on the guys. There would be time to tell her about his interview later.
Right now, they had to address the mess that was their intended approach.
“That was sloppy.” He stared around the circle.
Sean in particular dodged his gaze.
Alex strode to the prop pieces they were using to run through tonight’s operation. A couple free standing walls, a door, and they had their house. Their practice set up was located inside the yard behind the station, out of sight and under a large, metal awning. It shielded them from the direct glare of the sun and random observers.
“When we go in, keep it tight. I know you’re thinking Trevor’s right behind you, Liam, but he isn’t. Keep that shoulder in.”
Liam nodded and stared at his boots. The sniper might put on the good ‘ol boy act, but he took his job more serious than most. Alex had to handle criticism carefully with Liam, or else the man would take responsibility for everything that went wrong and start second guessing himself. Liam was best when he operated without doubt.
“Sean, when we go for that door hit it harder. I want in on one swing.”
“How sure are we they’re cooking meth?” Casey eyed his unopened bag of gear.
“Plain clothes say it wreaks of egg, so I’d say pretty certain.”
“Damn.” Casey sloshed water on his face. And of course he’d be disappointed. If it weren’t for the flammable chemicals, Casey could load the house full of non-lethal gas to ease their entry. One spark would spell the end of everything.
“Take five then we need to go through it again. We have to clear the front of the house faster and get to those rear rooms where intel said the cook is working.”
The group of men dispersed, some to the bathroom, but most for coolers of sports drinks and their cell phones. Jenna hung back, glancing over her shoulder.
He remained rooted to the spot which was the only reason he didn’t snatch her up and kiss her right there. Somehow, someway, he was more focused and on his game today. As if knowing that she would be in his bed tonight meant he could focus on the operation better. It didn’t make any sense, but whatever.
Alex grabbed a water and tugged at the neck of his shirt to let some air in. There was just enough of a breeze to tease him with the promise of cooling off, but in reality it didn’t do much. He couldn’t wait to get home and take a cold shower. Maybe he could convince Jenna to join him.
“Myers?”
Alex turned, jerking his thoughts back on track. He scrubbed a hand across his face to hide the undeniable heat he felt whenever he glanced at Jenna.
“Chief.” He extended his hand and shook the Chief of Police’s hand. Sam Taylor was what a person would imagine of a Texas lawman. Boots, jeans, a belt buckle the size of a dinner plate and a pair of hard blue eyes that cut through the bullshit. “We’ll be done and out of the way in another half hour.”
“Take all the time you need.” Sam hooked his thumbs into his belt loops. “I need to talk to you and the girl.”
Shit.
Had Jenna talked to Trevor yet? Why hadn’t he handled that himself?
“What about?” Could Alex head this off? Was there anything he could say to change the rules?
“We need to have a little chat, is all.”
“Sir—”
“Martin, right?”
“Yeah.” Alex glanced at the group. The guys were already eyeing the Chief warily. SWAT attracted thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. They were all good guys, but each had at least a few run-in’s with the Chief over something or other.
“Ms. Martin?”
Jenna froze, a bottle of water halfway to her mouth. Alex could see the wideness of her eyes, the sudden tension. She was a deer poised in the crosshairs because he’d been an ass last night.
Sam waved for her to join them and nodded back toward the building.
“Let’s have a little chat.”
“Yes, sir.”
Sam left Alex no choice but to tur
n and walk slowly toward the brick building. He was conscious of Jenna’s ground eating stride. By the time Sam grabbed the door and held it, she was right there on Alex’s heels.
“What’s up?” Jenna glanced between them. Outwardly, there were no signs, no indicator she had any idea what this was about. But Alex knew her better than that. He’d made a study of her more subtle tells and now he could read her mood in the still way she stood, the tilt of her head and even the way she breathed.
They both knew what this was about.
“Got an anonymous note this morning. Said you two were shacking up together.” Sam didn’t pull the punches, did he?
“Anonymous tip?” Jenna’s eyes widened.
A note?
That was all wrong. It didn’t make sense.
Trevor wouldn’t leave a note. He was too straight an arrow for that. He’d make an appointment then probably even invite Alex and Jenna to it so they’d have it all out in the open.
Which meant there was someone else out there who knew about them.
“Didn’t leave a name. Someone dropped an envelope in the suggestion box and addressed it to me. I’m not crazy about hearing this from outside the department.” If Sam hated one thing it was surprises.
“Oh, God.” Jenna ripped at the Velcro straps and wiggled out of her vest.
“Jenna?” Alex took her vest.
She walked two steps away and shook her head.
Who was the only other person watching them close enough to know they were together?
Who was the one person set to gain anything by outing them to their boss?
Her stalker. This proved it. Maybe now she’d give up the silly idea that something was wrong with her.
“Sir, if I may?” Alex hooked his arm through the straps of her vest and faced his boss.
“Alex.” There was a warning note in her voice, as if she knew he was spinning their story every which way, looking for a cover. Jenna turned to face them. Her cheeks were red and her hair stuck up every which way. “Sir, it’s my fault. We’re...”
“We’re interested in each other. Nothing more than that right now.” Alex stared at her, daring her to say otherwise.
Sam muttered something under his breath and threw up his hands. “Look, I don’t care if you are, I’m happy for you both, but I can’t have the two of you working stings together. Understand?”
Fighting Redemption Page 15