by R. T. Lowe
“Hello Amber,” Allison said conversationally. “My name’s Allison. I’m friends with someone you know. Felix—Felix August.” She arched her eyebrows at Amber. “You know who I’m talking about, right?”
Amber took a step back, sliding near the window in the center of the room. “Get the fuck out of my room or I’ll call campus security!”
Allison moved forward, keeping the door to her back, cutting off Amber’s only path to the hallway. “I don’t know you,” she began, “and frankly, I have no interest in getting to know you. I’ve heard you have a thing for short term relationships, and honestly, I couldn’t give a shit. Whatever gets you through the day, right? I just don’t care about any of that. But one thing I do care about is Felix, and what you’re doing to him has to end.”
Amber crossed her arms, giving Allison a disparaging look. “So that’s what this is about? What is he, your boyfriend or something?”
Allison ignored the remark. “You tried to sleep with him and he turned you down. I understand how that could hurt your feelings and I don’t want to be insensitive to that, but you can’t ruin his life because he’s not into you. So just let it go, okay? Go to the dean and tell her you propositioned Felix, he turned you down, and in a moment of irrational spite, you thought you’d get him in trouble, but didn’t realize he’d be expelled. Just tell her the truth and it’ll be like it never happened. Borakslovic will totally let the whole thing slide. She’s in the ERA—just like you.”
Amber laughed derisively.
Allison’s jaw tightened. “If you tell the dean the truth, this’ll all go away. You won’t see me again. It’ll be better for everybody. Trust me.”
Amber uncrossed her arms, observing Allison with a cold stare. “Better for Felix, you mean?”
“No, I mean better for everybody.”
Amber glanced over her shoulder at the rain streaked window overlooking the leafless branches of a towering oak. Slowly, she turned to Allison, her face flushed, more sanguine than the mounds of strawberry blonde hair that tumbled nearly to the small of her back.
“Felix is a fucking asshole!” Amber screamed, pointing a finger at Allison. “Who the hell does he think he is? Huh? He can’t just… just say those things and think that’s okay!”
“I get it,” Allison responded calmly, hearing voices out in the hall, hoping Amber’s roommate wasn’t coming back before lunch. “I do. I don’t know what he said, but I’ll talk to him, and I’m sure he’d be willing to apologize for whatever it was, okay? Felix is a standup guy and if he said something hurtful, he’ll own it and make it right. Would you accept his apology? Move on? Can you do that?”
Amber quirked an eyebrow skeptically. “I don’t think so.”
“But it’s a lie,” Allison said firmly, telling herself to stay calm, to leave out all traces of anger in her voice. “He never touched you. He never assaulted you. On two occasions, you tried to convince him to have sex with you and he turned you down. That’s all Felix ever did.”
“So what?” Amber replied and let out a pealing laugh. “I told him he’d regret it.” She smiled coyly. “Maybe he should have just fucked me when he had the chance.”
Allison held her gaze, struggling to control her rage, every cell in her body yearning to slap the shit out of this evil lying bitch. “So you’re going to make Felix burn because he hurt your feelings?”
“Pretty much,” Amber answered flippantly, stepping over to one of the desks that flanked the window.
“But Felix never even touched you.” She spoke the words very slowly. “Felix never laid a hand on you.”
“I know,” Amber replied lightly. “And I’m gonna love seeing that cocky asshole pack up his shit and move the hell back to that dive he’s from.”
“Don’t you think that’s unfair?” Allison said, maintaining a calm and reasonable voice. “Felix did absolutely nothing wrong and you’re going to get him expelled? How can you do that to him?”
“That’s the beauty of it.” Amber checked herself in a mirror beside the bed, smiling at Allison. “That’s why it’s going to hurt him so much. He’ll spend the rest of his life digging ditches and working at gas stations, and he’ll know it’s all because I lied. I lied to the dean and now Felix’s life is going to suck forever. I suppose it will just kill him inside, but isn’t that the point? You can’t make someone understand unless they hurt. When he feels pain, he’ll know how much I hurt. Then he’ll understand he only has himself to blame.” She turned back, facing Allison, her lips curling up at the corners. “He should’ve just given me what I wanted.”
Smiling inwardly (and triumphantly), Allison slipped a hand in the back pocket of her jeans and retrieved her cell phone. She illuminated the screen with her thumb, holding it up for Amber to see. “Thanks for the confession, Amber McSweeney.”
Amber squinted in confusion then her eyes widened as she realized Allison had recorded their conversation. She lunged desperately for the phone, reaching for it with both hands. “Give me—”
Allison slapped her across the face, stunning her.
Amber’s mouth twisted in fury. “You fu—”
Allison, using the same hand, slapped her again, harder than before, dislodging a bolt of snot from her nostril.
Amber put a shocked hand to her purpling cheek, tears forming in her large brown eyes. “What are you, some kind of fucking psycho? You’re done at this school, you bitch! I’m telling the dean! She’s gonna—”
Allison only held back a little with the next one. The force of her open-handed blow sent Amber sprawling to the bed. She gripped the blanket in her fists, turning her hateful eyes on Allison, her mouth beginning to open.
Any thought Amber may have given to calling for help was cut short when Allison curled her fingers around her throat and lifted her to her feet. She struggled for a moment, but that effort too was silenced with a crushing grip that left Amber gasping madly for air.
“I gave you a choice,” Allison said, her eyes blazing. “I was fair with you. I really was. I said I’d get Felix to apologize even though I know he wouldn’t have said anything you didn’t deserve. And now here we are.” She turned Amber’s tear-soaked face so that they were eye to eye. “As much pain as you think you’re in, I promise this is nothing compared to what will happen if you don’t recant your story. Felix loves this school and you will not—will not—take that away. I have your voice on my phone, and if you even think about not coming clean, I’ll upload it for the world to hear. Everyone will know what you’re really all about, and you’ll be the one digging ditches. And if you tell the dean about me and our”—she tipped her head—“conversation, I’ll kill you. I will end your life, Amber, and there’s nothing and no one who can stop me. When I leave this room, you’re going to think about calling campus security or the cops. You’re going to think about running to Borakslovic and telling her I beat you up. You’ll think you’re safe.” Allison released her and she collapsed limply to the floor, sucking in great whimpering breaths, weeping pathetically. “But that would be a mistake.” Allison made her way to the door.
Amber bawled, wiping at her eyes. “You’re fucking crazy. You wouldn’t… you wouldn’t really… kill me.”
Allison held Amber’s gaze. “Wouldn’t I?” She unlocked the door and opened it a crack, peering out into the empty hall. She turned back, her eyes roaming over Amber’s swelling cheek and the streaks of scarlet racing across her pale throat. “You should have that conversation with Borakslovic on the phone. Tell her you’re not feeling well, that the guilt of nearly ruining Felix’s future made you sick. You can pull that off. Just remember that your life depends on it.” She stepped out into the hall and closed the door behind her, silencing Amber’s pitiful sobs.
Chapter 26
COLLISION
Felix had planned to go by himself until Allison convinced him it would be better if she went along with him. She’d told him she wanted to meet Lofton in person, and while Felix believed her, h
e also thought she feared he might do something stupid or reckless. Her suspicions weren’t completely unwarranted. Felix’s anger had swelled incrementally during the day, and by the time he’d texted Lofton “to meet at the fountain,” he was in a near rage over Bill’s murder.
Under a black and featureless night sky, they passed St. Rose and continued on in silence as the bronze deities guarding the fountain appeared beyond a grove of oaks. A statue appeared to move, growing taller, and then another, and as they took in the silhouettes, one a full head higher than the other, they realized Lofton wasn’t alone.
Allison tugged gently on Felix’s sleeve. “Nothing rash,” she warned him. “Wars have started over misunderstandings. Remember Archduke Franz Ferdinand?” She smiled to let him know her World War I reference was intended to be a fairly pathetic attempt at humor.
Felix said nothing. He didn’t need to remind her that Dalton was an AshCorp employee and that whoever had killed Bill had done so under Lofton’s direction.
“Remember what the Protectors tried to do?” Allison persisted, serious again. “Everything isn’t always what it seems. You know that, right?”
Felix slowed. “I’m just here to talk to him. I don’t know what he can say that’ll convince me he’s not responsible, but I’m not gonna do anything stupid.”
Allison nodded, though she harbored a glimmer of doubt in her eyes.
“Hello!” a man’s voice called out.
Felix and Allison stopped just short of the garden. Felix took a breath and clenched his hands, trying to keep his anger in check. Allison swallowed hard.
Lofton stepped away from a bench that sat facing another just like it on the opposite side, the shadowed faces of the gods staring down mutely from their pedestals. Lofton wore jeans and a light jacket. The woman he was with waited a beat and then joined him, her heels leaving behind dime-sized divots as she sauntered through the wet gravel. Her skirt was long and cardinal red and she wore a beret of the same color, cocked fashionably across her forehead. She may have been older than Felix and Allison, but only by a year or two.
“You must be Allison,” Lofton said cordially. “Pleasure to meet you. I’m Lofton and this is Josephine.” He gestured at the woman beside him who extended her hand and walked toward them.
“Back the hell up!” Felix shouted, pointing at her.
Josephine ignored him, cracking a grin.
“Stop!” Felix shouted, the woman’s smile feeling like a provocation, an intentionally belligerent act.
She kept walking, her grin widening, as if daring Felix to do something about it.
“Felix,” Allison hissed out the side of her mouth, “don’t do any—”
Felix gripped Josephine and snatched her off the ground. She made a gagging sound and a red stiletto slipped off her foot, settling on its side in a shallow puddle.
Lofton raised a hand and Felix felt a warm tickling sensation around his ears, and then his mouth began to form words and he spoke them: “His mind was closed to me. It always has been to an extent. He may be my son, but—” The Journal? Felix thought, confused. Why had he recited the last words of the Journal? Then it hit him. Lofton had invaded his mind and forced the words from him.
Felix turned his eyes to Lofton, his anger coming off of him in waves.
“My apologies, but I had to know,” Lofton said preemptively. “It was the only way to find out if there was more to the Journal than this.” From an inside pocket of his jacket he retrieved a small brown book, and even in the dimness of the stone garden, Felix could see that its cover was mottled and worn. He turned it in his hand, showing Felix something he already knew—the back wasn’t bound.
Felix stared at the Journal, his mind flooded with memories of the night Bill had introduced him to the world inside its broken cover. Allison said something but the words were lost in the memories of the past and the emotions coursing through him. Bill had died because of the Journal. Why hadn’t he asked him if—?
It burst in a sudden puff of flames and vanished in less time than it takes to flip a light switch. A trace of smoke lingered for a second and then the winds carried it away and nothing remained. Not even ash or dust. Nothing.
“Now it is gone,” Lofton said solemnly.
Gone? Felix’s fury threatened to consume him. Lofton knew Bill had died for the Journal and he’d treated it like something worthless—like trash. Felix’s eyes moved to Josephine and he strengthened his grip, directing his anger at her.
Josephine shrieked, begging with her eyes for Lofton to intervene.
“Let her go,” Allison said. “Felix!” She tried to pull down on his arm, but it was as intractable as the statues surrounding them. “Let her go!”
“Listen to Allison,” Lofton said evenly, his arm still raised toward Felix. “Josephine had nothing to do with Bill’s death. I asked you to bring me the Journal and you declined. I appreciate the exercise of one’s free will—more than you know—but free will comes at a price. You could have asked Bill for it, even taken it from him, and in either instance, he would be alive today. The consequence of inaction, of doing nothing and hoping everything will turn out okay, is that you relinquish control. You buried your head in the sand knowing I would seek other means to acquire the Journal once it became clear to me you hadn’t accepted the terms of your test.”
“Test?” Felix raged. “This isn’t a game! You killed him just to find out if I’d join you, to see if I’d be one of your”—he raised his eyes to the writhing Josephine—“minions.”
Lofton appeared stunned and he lowered his arm to his side. “Is that what you think you are to me? Someone I can order around like I’m some self-important Wisp?” He shook his head in disappointment. “You’re special, Felix. You are not destined to be a bystander who simply observes the revolution spreading across the planet. You are destined to shape it. The Journal had to be destroyed to preserve our tenuous peace, which you can solidify by proclaiming yourself the Belus and convincing the Order that all Sourcerors must stand as one—united. If you don’t, then I fear the veil will one day be lifted, and when the public knows of our existence the balance will shift.” He paused meaningfully. “I can correct it, but in doing so there will be sacrifices I dearly hope to avoid.”
“You could have told me!” Felix shouted desperately. “I didn’t know you’d…” Finishing the sentence seemed foolish as only a fool could think that Lofton wouldn’t find other ways to obtain the Journal.
“We all fail from time to time,” Lofton said reasonably. “None of us is without flaws. I didn’t wish for Bill to die though I know that’s of no consolation to you. He is dead and that’s what matters. In death, as in life, intent is irrelevant. We are born and we die and what we intend to do means nothing. All that matters is what we do—what we accomplish. You have a role Felix, and though I’ve tried to make you understand the perfect world we can fashion together, only you can make that choice. And if your importance in the universe isn’t sufficient to convince you of the path you must take, I would ask that you remember your connection to me. We are family. You are my cousin, and we were meant to do this together. Think of the good we can do, the kind of world we can build.”
Felix wavered, feeling his grip on Josephine loosen. Family? What did that mean? Together? Could Lofton be right? Were they really meant to be on the same side? To be family? But Lofton was a monster. Wasn’t he?
Allison watched Lofton, brow creased, eyes wide, conflicted emotions warring across her face.
“Let me go!” Josephine screeched. “Jesus Christ! He was just a goddamn Wisp! What is your prob—!”
“You!” Felix roared, tightening his hold on her, watching her eyes bulge. “I’ve had enough of you!” He squeezed, but something felt… off. His vise was weakening, as if he was attempting to clamp down with a hand that had fallen asleep and gone numb during the night. The air around Josephine sparked and swirled in currents of pale red, churning like waves crashing against the shore. Her
eyes returned to their normal size and she blew out a breath of relief. Slowly, she began to descend, rolling her neck on her shoulders as she did so, her feet touching down lightly on the ground.
Felix stared at his outstretched hand and made a fist. He felt the power in his veins and his mind was clear and focused, so why had his powers gone dark? Why had the air turned red? It couldn’t have been Josephine. He hadn’t felt any resistance from—
“Look out!” Allison warned.
Reflexively, Felix whirled toward Lofton and his mind unleashed the energy inside of him like a flare erupting from the sun, and though it carried the destructive capacity to level a forest, it burst apart against an invisible barrier, the collision of forces of equal magnitude exploding around them in light and sound, shock waves warping the air, infusing it with electricity and a power infinitely deeper, pure, ancient and elemental.
Lofton, arm out in front, palm facing Felix, stood placidly.
Felix pushed harder, trying to break down the wall, trying to reach Lofton.
“You can’t hurt me like this,” Lofton told him.
Hurt him? Felix wasn’t sure if he was trying to hurt him. He was angry at Lofton (and himself) for Bill’s death, and he wanted him to know he didn’t appreciate anyone toying with his brain—or neutralizing his powers. He wanted to knock Lofton on his ass, and if it hurt him a little, he deserved it. He pushed even harder and Lofton’s eyes narrowed in concentration, the first signs of strain showing around his mouth. Lofton’s wall absorbed Felix’s energy, soaking it up, and then, like an overflowing vessel, it spilled out and erupted as though they were witnessing the awakening of a long dormant volcano.
In the open air between Felix and Lofton, a column began to form, twisting and shifting, glimmering in blues and reds, stretching up to the heavens. A tremendous tempest arose. Allison’s hair whipped around her face and she staggered, the wind pushing her backward. Josephine clutched the leg of Poseidon and let go just as the statue toppled from its perch and slammed to the ground, the helmeted head breaking off at the neck. Rain began to fall in great soaking drops. The sky flashed red and blue, lighting up the clouds moving in a methodical spiral, like water circling around a drain. The temperature dropped abruptly. Lightning streaked across the sky and hail plummeted to earth, the sound of the barrage diminished amidst the deafening roar of thunder. Josephine covered her head and crawled beneath a bench.