by Jo Sandhu
‘I’m going to need you to lift his leg,’ Kaija said. ‘Yorv?’ The boy looked at her, but his eyes were glazed with pain. ‘This is going to hurt, but I need to wrap your leg so the bleeding will stop.’ Then Kaija spoke quietly to Luuka, Tarin and Aba. ‘Are you ready? Aba, maybe you can hold his hand. It will help with the pain.’
Yorv screamed as they moved his leg, holding it just off the ground so Kaija and Vana could wrap the strips of bison hide around it and tie them firmly in place. All of them were breathing heavily by the time they had finished.
‘The herbs will slow the bleeding,’ Kaija said. ‘And willowbark and nettle tea will help the pain and make his spirit strong to fight.’
‘Yorv strong,’ said Narn, looking down at his friend. ‘Fight good. Fight strong.’
Kaija hoped he was right.
Worj refused treatment for his bruised ribs. ‘Cut deer,’ he grunted. ‘Soon, cave hyena come. Steal meat.’
Even as he spoke, the undergrowth rustled. Two eyes glowed briefly, a predator scenting the fallen animals. Narn’s sling whirled and a stone flew into the bushes. The eyes disappeared.
Kaija sat by Yorv, feeding him small sips of tea, while the rest of the hunting party butchered the deer and the donta. Three deer had fallen before the donta attacked. Rohk and Nilkka helped keep the predators away, but a sly wolverine was too fast even for the wolf pups. It sprayed a hindquarter of a large deer with its musky scent. Nord felled the wolverine with his sling, but the deer meat was ruined. He pulled it away from the rest of the hunt and left it for the predators.
Rain started to fall as they finished packing the meat onto sledges made from sturdy aspen poles and bison hide. Yorv would also travel back to the cave this way. Nord and Iva hoisted him up and set off through the forest as it began to rain.
‘Water come from Ice Bringer,’ said Worj. ‘River flood.’
The only good thing about the rain, Tarin thought, was it washed the blood from their clothes and hands. He raised his face toward the falling raindrops and opened his mouth. The ground became slick. Patches of dirty snow mixed with mud made the track treacherous. Tarin stumbled many times, and soon his leggings were caked in mud. The sledge he dragged kept snagging on rocks and low-growing brush. His hair fell limply around his face. The wolves trotted forlornly by his side, water dripping from their tails and their ears.
Ahead of him, Iva and Nord struggled with Yorv’s sledge. Kaija walked beside them, adjusting bandages and offering words of encouragement. ‘It’s not far now, Yorv. You’ll be home soon.’
Each cry of pain was like a flint blade driving into Tarin’s heart. It’s my fault, he thought. If only I had been faster and more accurate. The rain beat down on his bowed head and he plodded through the mud. The closer they got to home, the worse he felt. He had been so proud of the new spear thrower and his flint-tipped spears, but Roba had been the one to save Yorv. Roba and his thick, clumsy-looking wooden spears. Tarin moved closer to him.
‘Roba,’ he said. Roba walked with a slight limp, his head and shoulders bowed. ‘Roba, I thank you,’ Tarin said. ‘You saved my life. When the donta was charging, I felt I was dead.’
Roba looked grave, then nodded. ‘Clan,’ he said. ‘Yarin clan.’ Then he looked down and trudged onwards.
The track was now a quagmire. The sticky mud dragged at their boots and the heavily laden sledges. Worj helped Tarin push his through a deep puddle.
‘Ice Bringer many names,’ Worj said, straining to move the sledge and wincing at his bruised ribs. The sledge slipped sideways and Tarin pushed against it. ‘In Winter, we say “Ice Bringer”. In Spring, we say “Life Giver”. Forest need water. Gives life. But maybe now too much water.’
He straightened and grinned at Tarin as the sledge scraped along firmer ground. His face and hair were covered in mud. It ran in rivulets down his chest. Tarin grinned, too. He was sure he looked the same.
When they reached the stream below the cave, the water level had already risen. Restrained by the ice all Winter, the stream was now a torrent, surging down the mountainside. Tarin watched the other hunters as they slowed to cross. They felt carefully for a firm footing, and waded through the thigh-high water.
Tarin felt the rocks wobble beneath his feet. The water pushed against him. It was still icy cold. A misplaced footing nearly saw him drop the sledge, but Luuka grabbed his arm and steadied him. Luuka then helped Aba and Kaija across, and together they pushed through the heavy rain to the welcoming warmth of the cave.
Novi screamed and flew across the cave as Yorv’s sledge was laid down near the fire.
‘Yorv! Yorv!’ the girl cried. Her pregnant stomach was now so large she had trouble bending over. She clasped his hand and held it to her cheek, her tears running freely. Ruva talked softly to Aba and Kaija, nodding her head as she examined Yorv’s leg. Vana pulled Novi away gently.
‘Ruva good medicine woman. Yaiya good medicine woman. Help Yorv.’ She held the weeping girl in her arms and rocked her as she would one of her children.
Tarin and Luuka helped unload the sledges, but their eyes kept straying to the scene around Ruva’s fire. The mood in the cave was subdued. Even the children were quiet.
‘Yorv strong.’ Yeb sat down near the largest deer. He sliced through the tendons holding the skin to the flesh, then ripped the rest of the deer skin free. Tarin helped him cut the meat into small strips, then Mohv and Zuuv placed the strips over the drying racks.
They all paused what they were doing as Yorv screamed. The women were changing the makeshift dressing on his leg. Ruva chewed the water iris roots and spat the pulp onto the wound. Aba cut long strips of buckskin into bandages, and Kaija prepared a pain-relieving tea. Iva helped them lift Yorv once the bandages were again wrapped around his leg.
As she worked, Ruva sang a low, crooning chant, and Aba joined in. Then Iva’s deeper voice also added to the women’s, and Narn and Yeb left what they were doing to join the chorus. Soon, the entire cave was clustered around Yorv’s bed, singing and chanting to him, calling his Spirit to stay with them. Kaija fed him spoonfuls of tea and he closed his eyes and lay back on the bed of furs. She dipped a soft rabbit skin into a sweet-smelling wash and bathed his face.
‘Novi do?’ The girl held her hand out hesitantly. Kaija nodded and gave her place to Novi. Rohk nosed his way through the crowd and settled himself beside Yorv. He sighed and closed his eyes, his chin resting on Yorv’s arm.
The chanting quietened. Everyone returned to their own fires except Lorv and Novi. They sat either side of Yorv, watching him.
Tarin grabbed a woven basket of stomachs, bladders and intestines. The rain had eased, but the clouds still covered the sky, threatening further storms. It was an uneasy truce. He carried the basket down to the stream, glad to be out of the gloomy atmosphere of the cave. The scent of the wet forest and the wind against his face lifted his spirits. He found a rock to sit on and let the rushing water wash the intestines clean and the blood from his hands.
‘Tarin?’ Kaija approached, carrying a cup of steaming tea. ‘All the hunters need a tonic, I think.’ She passed him the cup. ‘It’s linden flower, camomile and pine needles, with a little bit of willowbark.’
‘Thank you,’ he murmured. Kaija squatted beside him and picked up one of the stomachs. She rinsed it in the stream and glanced at him.
‘Yorv is resting easier.’ She filled the stomach with water and tied a twist of leather around the top and bottom. She put it aside and picked up another. ‘He’s strong. It may take a while, but his leg will heal.’
Tarin nodded. He placed the length of intestine back in the bag, but didn’t take another. He sat and stared at the water, letting his fingers trail in the current. Kaija set the other stomach aside and started rinsing the bladders.
‘It will be hard for Worj’s Clan if they are down one hunter,’ Tarin said quietly.
‘We have three deers and a rhinoceros to add to the stockpile.’ Kaija’s voice was calm and even
. ‘Soon we can hunt for willow grouse and beaver. Uva tells me downstream is well stocked with trout and grayling.’
Tarin nodded. He dipped his hands in the water and splashed his face. ‘The reindeer migration will start soon. Narn says they pass very close to here.’
Kaija studied him shrewdly. ‘So, they are well provisioned for Spring. When we leave, we don’t have to worry that it will cause them any hardship.’
Tarin didn’t reply. He picked up a stone and threw it into the water.
‘Do you want to leave?’ Kaija’s voice was low.
Tarin’s shoulders slumped. He ran his hands through his hair and stared at the tumbling water. Kaija waited silently. Finally, he picked up another stone and threw it into the stream.
‘I want to stay. They will need our help. But I also need to go. I promised Mammoth Clan . . .’ He turned to face her. ‘How do I choose?’
Slowly, Kaija picked up the last bladder from the basket. She bent her head low as she rinsed it clean.
‘My mother always said, sometimes you have to choose the path that hurts, not the path that is easiest.’
‘Easiest?’ Tarin’s voice rose. ‘None of my paths are easy! I promised Mammoth Clan I would go to the Mother’s Mountain, and I will, even if there is no Offering left to give.’ He was glad when Kaija’s cheeks turned pink and she bit her lip. ‘But I also need to help Worj’s Clan hunt. How can I leave them now?’
‘Has Worj told you not to go?’
‘No.’ Tarin frowned.
‘Has he asked you, asked us, to stay?’
‘No, but . . .’ Tarin stopped and glared once more at the water. Another stone flew downstream.
Kaija sat back on her heals and studied him. ‘Maybe there is no choice to make then.’
‘I think if we asked, we would be welcome to stay.’
‘I’m sure we would. But is that what you want?’
Tarin shrugged, not meeting her eyes.
Kaija sighed. ‘You are the only one who knows what is in your heart, Tarin. You have to decide.’ Her hands stilled and the water flowed over the clean bladder. ‘Can’t you ask the Spirits for guidance?’
Tarin breathed in deeply. ‘Do you think I haven’t? I keep calling for Owl . . . but . . .’ He paused, unwilling to admit he was still having trouble reaching his totem guides. Owl was quiet and Wolf was running far away. Sometimes, in his dreams, he thought he heard Wolf calling to him, but the forest was too thick and the shadows too dark. He shivered. What if his guides had abandoned him? What would he do?
‘Think about both your choices,’ Kaija was saying. ‘Which one hurts the most?’ She placed the bladder back in the basket and rubbed her hands with some crushed soapwort. ‘Usually by this time, my clan is fishing,’ she said. ‘We fish for salmon, and a party will make a journey to the river where the giant sturgeons live . . .’ Her voice faded and her hands stilled. Then she shook her head, as though waking from a dream. ‘But that is like another life. It doesn’t hurt me to think of them living their lives without me. What does hurt is knowing my youngest brother is not there to run with the boys and feel the sun on his face. But I have no choice. He is with the spirits and I . . . I am not.’
Tarin thought about his own family. ‘Mammoth Clan will be hunting reindeer.’ He pressed his lips together. ‘If any of them survived the Winter.’ Suddenly he realised that thought still hurt, as sharply as the day he had set out on his journey. The thought of his clan dying, and him failing and unable to help – it was a hurt that gripped his heart and threatened to choke him. He couldn’t let that happen. It was his fault, after all. If he hadn’t ruined that last hunt . . . if he had been stronger, faster . . . if he had been able to fall the donta before it attacked Yorv . . .
‘Everywhere I go, I cause problems.’ He let his head drop back and he stared at the sky.
Owl! Where are you?
‘What are you talking about?’ Kaija couldn’t keep the frustration out of her voice.
Tarin raked his hair. ‘I fail . . . at everything! At everything I do. I endanger my whole clan. You nearly die. And now Yorv’s leg . . . If he can’t walk on it, he can’t hunt. How do you think he’ll survive like that?’
Kaija snorted. ‘You helped me save Luuka. You saved my life. Yorv’s clan will look after him, whether he can hunt or not.’
Tarin sniffed and refused to look at her.
‘And just how are you responsible for the donta attack?’
‘If I had been faster with the spear thrower!’
‘There were other hunters there. Aren’t any of them responsible?’
Tarin shrugged. ‘But I should have felled the donta before it attacked.’
Kaija shook her head and rolled her eyes.
‘I should have been better at it.’ Tarin glared at her.
‘Fine,’ Kaija snapped. ‘Then go and practice. Practice every day until you can fell a charging donta with one spear. Don’t just sit here feeling sorry for yourself.’ She stood up and grabbed the basket.
‘I’m not feeling sorry for myself.’
‘Yes, you are! You sound just like a baby. You think you should be better? Then go and do something about it.’ Kaija picked up the basket and balanced it on her hip. ‘You can’t save everyone, Tarin.’ And she turned and stalked back to the cave.
Tarin stared after her, his insides churning like the stream. He threw a rock into the water and another one into the trees. A startled bird took flight. He watched it wing skywards, struggling against the wind. Fat raindrops fell on his upturned face. The clouds rumbled. Tarin pushed himself to his feet, and trudged back toward the cave.
It was the middle of the night when a noise woke Tarin. It confused him. It sounded like a cry of pain, but Yorv was sleeping quietly by Ruva’s fire. He must have dreamed it, he thought.
Then the cry came again. Tarin sat up and looked around, rubbing his sleepy eyes. Luuka snored softly on the other side of their fire, Rohk curled up on his feet. Rohk opened one eye and sighed. Tarin looked toward Kaija’s sleeping furs, but she wasn’t there. He heard the cry of pain again, followed by a long moan. Kaija was in trouble!
He jumped to his feet and saw her hunched figure against the glow of Uva’s fire.
‘Kaija, what’s wrong? Are you in pain?’ He placed his hand on her shoulder, and was surprised to see her glance up at him in amusement.
‘Not as much as Novi,’ she said. She moved slightly so Tarin could see the girl lying on a bed of furs. Her face was beaded in sweat and she clutched Uva’s and Kaija’s hands. She groaned and arched her back. Uva and Kaija strained against her grip as Novi cried out.
‘Good, good,’ Ruva murmured. ‘Now breathe . . . deep . . .’ She demonstrated how she wanted Novi to breathe.
‘Novi’s having her baby.’ Kaija flexed her crushed hand in between the contractions.
‘Oh.’ Tarin looked at her blankly. He looked down at Nilkka who was sitting quietly at the end of the bed, her glowing eyes fixed on Novi. ‘Can I help?’
‘Yes, you can go away.’ Kaija gripped Novi’s hand as she moaned again. When Tarin didn’t move, Ruva hissed at him and pushed him away.
Kaija grinned. ‘Go and sit with Yorv,’ she said. ‘If he wakes, give him some of the tea next to him. And you can make some fresh tea for everyone else.’ She glanced down at the writhing girl. ‘It’s going to be a long night.’
Tarin didn’t know when he had spent such a sleepless night. When Maikki was born, the children were kept away in another lodge. But in the shared cave, there was nowhere else to go. Soon, most of the clan were awake. They sat huddled in groups, clutching the tea that Tarin had made and staring at the flickering flames.
Novi’s cries grew louder, until even Yorv heard them. He woke and struggled to sit up. Worj joined them at the fire.
‘When Uva have first son very hard,’ Worj murmured, taking the cup of tea Tarin passed to him. ‘All night. All day. All next night.’
But towards dawn, the ac
tion at Uva’s fire changed. Ruva pulled Novi into a squatting position, her arms wrapped around the younger woman’s belly. Novi shrieked, her cry echoing around the cave. A moment of silence followed, and then the cave resounded with the cry of a newborn baby.
Worj nodded, and clapped Yorv on the shoulder. Yorv struggled to see his mate, but Worj pushed him back. Uva approached, carrying a squirming, wailing bundle. She knelt and pulled back the soft rabbit skin, presenting the latest member of the clan.
‘Novi have beautiful girl,’ she said.
Tarin stared in awe at the tiny creature. She was wrinkled and red and waved her fists angrily in the air. He didn’t think he had ever seen such an ugly baby.
‘Novi well?’ Yorv asked, his eyes worried.
Uva nodded. ‘Novi strong.’ She closed the wrapping back over the baby and hurried back to the new mother.
Yorv sighed and leaned back on the furs, smiling happily.
Tarin stood at the side of the stream and scowled. The water rushed down the mountainside, swollen with Spring rain and melted snow. Ice crusted the rocks, breaking off in chunks to swirl and bump as they were carried downstream. In the forest, patches of deep, wet snow remained, protected by low-growing branches, but it was slowly washing away, leaving the ground soft and muddy.
The days were warmer, too, and Tarin no longer wore a heavy fur outside. Night-time temperatures could be treacherous, refreezing still ponds and boggy swamps. Tarin and Luuka were caught early one morning, chasing a light-footed rabbit. A bog had frozen over through the night, and while the rabbit leapt nimbly across the ice, the boys crashed through the thin crust to the mud below. The clan laughed to see them return empty-handed, with mud covering their legs like thick, black fur.
Tarin had talked to Worj of leaving. Worj had scratched his beard and looked out over the forest.
‘People of Wolf can stay,’ he said.
‘Thank you.’ Tarin looked out over the trees as well. A sharp wind blew, making his eyes sting. He rubbed his nose. ‘Always, I will remember Worj’s Clan. But I must go. I promised.’ The wind dried his throat and he coughed.