by Leanne Banks
She sucked in a shocked breath and he felt her gaze on him. “Is this about me and Kiki or Jenny and the baby you lost?” she whispered.
He blinked at her blunt question.
“At some point, you’re going to have to realize that I’m not Jenny and this baby is not the one you lost. I’m doing the best I can to live my life to the fullest at the same time I nurture my baby. Don’t accuse me of being a bad mother again.”
“I wasn’t,” he said.
“It certainly sounded like it,” she said and looked out the passenger window.
They rode several miles in silence. Zach struggled with her accusation. He wasn’t sure she knew how fragile her life or the baby’s life could be, and he couldn’t begin to make her understand.
Zach pulled into the garage and stopped. “Thank you for the ride home. Good night,” she said and stepped out of the car and away from him.
For the next several days, Tina slept in the guest bedroom and avoided Zach at dinner. After a week passed, he approached her in the hallway late at night.
“Are you still mad at me?” he asked.
She crossed her arms under her chest. “I wouldn’t use the word mad,” she said, lifting her chin.
“Then what word would you use? Furious? Murderous? Beyond angry?”
“Murderous is close,” she said, her sexy impudent gaze meeting his.
“Why murderous?” he asked. “All I did was drive you home from the doctor.”
“While you accused me of being a bad mother,” she said, her own green gaze turning dark.
“I didn’t say you were a bad mother,” he said.
“Close enough,” she retorted.
“How could you be a bad mother when you fled all your royal crap to search out what was best for you and your baby?” he asked.
She paused a long moment. “Do you realize what I turned down?”
“I have an idea,” Zach said. “Even though you were pregnant with another man’s child, you could have married an English earl, an Italian count or a Spanish prince.”
She appeared surprised at his knowledge. “They wanted my title. They didn’t want me.”
“I want you,” he said.
“How do I know you don’t want me just because of the baby?” she asked.
“Because I wanted you before the baby existed,” he said.
She searched his gaze then looked away. “I hadn’t thought about that.”
“Why don’t you think about it some more while you sleep with me?” he asked.
“I’m not a good sleep partner,” she said. “I wake up every hour, go to the bathroom, toss and turn.”
He took her hand in his and pulled her against him. “Come to bed with me.”
“As long as you understand there’s no sexy hootchie koo in your near future,” she warned.
“No sexy hootchie koo,” he agreed and reveled in her warmth. “But that’s not because I don’t want your sexy hootchie koo.”
Tina sighed. “That’s good to know.”
With each day that passed, Tina felt as if she must be gaining at least a pound. Her back hurt, her thighs ached and her abdomen seemed to cramp every other hour.
“This sucks,” Tina said to Hildie and Eve. “If every woman felt like I did, there would be no population explosion.”
“Sit down and put your feet up,” Hildie said. “You need to focus on the gorgeous baby you’re going to have in just a few weeks.”
“Easy for you to say,” Tina said. “You don’t have hemorrhoids.”
Eve winced then patted Tina’s hand. “I have to tell you that the assistant to the assistant of your brother got in touch with me.”
“Salvadore,” Tina said, astonished, but at the same time not. “Stefan wants to steal you away to manage his prize horses. What did you say?”
“Two words I learned from Zach,” Eve said with a wily grin.
“What’s that?”
“More money,” Eve said.
Tina laughed. “Good for you. You will earn every penny if you work for my brother, so make sure you negotiate a fantastic salary. Are you really willing to live in another country to work and earn your living?”
“I’m not happy doing what I’m doing. We’ll see how the Devereauxs come through.”
“I should warn you that my brother is ruthless when he finds something he wants. Be careful,” she said.
“I’m a big girl,” Eve said. “As much as I like you, I’m not at all susceptible to a royal title. In my mind, you are the amazing exception that proves the arrogant rule.”
“I’ll take that as one of the highest compliments I’ve received,” Tina said.
A week before Christmas, Tina hid in her bedroom so she could wrap the gifts she’d ordered online for Zach, Hildie, and Eve. She’d already ordered gifts for her family and Zach’s brother and sister that should arrive any day.
She felt more crampy than usual but put it down to bending and stretching. Crankiness went against her usual nature, but she was also still bothered about what she was going to do after her agreed-upon time with Zachary passed.
The closer the time came for her to deliver the baby, the more she wanted to be home, but now she wasn’t sure where home was for her.
A cramp twisted her muscles, momentarily stealing her breath. The intensity of it took her by surprise. Labor? she wondered, then pushed the possibility aside. She’d been having cramps for weeks. This wasn’t any different, she told herself.
But then she felt a gush of water rush down her leg.
She gasped in shock. Her water had broken. She was in labor. She was going to have her baby very soon. Her heart hammering with excitement, she didn’t know what to do first. Tell Zach. Change clothes.
She decided to change clothes and told herself to stay calm. Women did this every day. Everything would be okay. Her abdomen tightened again, this time stronger. She took another breath.
In the past two centuries of the Devereaux women giving birth, none of them had done it naturally, and she didn’t plan to be the first. Right now she wanted to get to the hospital to get her epidural as quickly as possible. No need fighting the contractions.
Despite her discomfort, excitement rushed through her. Kiki was coming soon.
She went to the bathroom to change. As she looked at her clothes, she saw blood instead of water. Alarm shot through her. She panicked at the sight of bright red. Was her baby okay?
Tina smothered a sob. She had to hold it together. Zach would be nervous enough for both of them. Quickly changing her clothes, she grabbed a towel and went downstairs.
“Hildie,” she called. “Hildie, where is Zachary? I need to speak to him immediately.”
Hildie poked her head out from the kitchen. “He went out. Some calves got caught in some barbed wire. Poor animals are dumber than dirt….”
She must have read the alarm on Tina’s face. “What’s wrong?”
Tina swallowed over the knot of fear forming in her throat. “My water broke.”
Hildie’s eyes rounded. “Oh my goodness. We have to get him here right away. Call him. Call him.”
“I hope he’s reachable,” Tina said, taking the house phone from Hildie. Zach’s cell rang once, twice, three times. Her nervousness ratcheted up another notch.
“Hello,” Zach said, sounding out of breath. “What do you need?”
“It’s time,” Tina said.
“For what?” he asked, sounding distracted.
“For you to take me to the hospital. My water broke,” she said. “I need to go now.”
“Damn,” he said. “Hell,” he said, then swore again. “I’m on my way,” he said and hung up.
With trembling fingers, Tina called her doctor and was put on hold. She stepped away from Hildie, who was watching her like a hawk. Finally a nurse came on the line.
“Dr. McAllister is with a patient,” the nurse said. “How can I help you?”
“This is Valentina Devereaux. I’m in lab
or. My water has broken.” She lowered her voice. “And I’m bleeding.”
“Go to the hospital immediately,” the nurse said. “The doctor will meet you there as soon as you arrive.”
Go to the hospital immediately. As if she were planning to go shopping or get a pedicure on the way.
Hildie walked toward her, face wreathed in concern. “Would you like some water? A cup of tea?”
“Thank you, but I’m fine. On second thought, perhaps I should take a bottle of water with me.”
“I’ll get it right away,” Hildie said as a vehicle screeched in front of the house.
“That must be Zach,” Tina said, feeling a sliver of relief. She walked toward the door, feeling another trickle run down her leg. Was it water or blood?
Determined to keep herself together, for her sake and Zach’s, she carefully descended the steps. Zach jumped out of the car.
“I’ll get your suitcase,” he said.
He was speaking of the bag she’d packed in anticipation of this day, but Tina didn’t want to wait one moment longer. “I’d rather leave now,” she said.
He stopped in his steps and stared into her eyes. She tried with everything inside her not to show her fear. He gave a slow nod. “Okay, let’s go.”
Hildie scrambled down the steps with a bottle of water in each hand. “Here’s one for both of you,” she said, shoving them at Zach. “Call me the second you have any news.” Hildie turned to Tina. “You’re going to do great. You’re going to be fine. I know it,” she said and gave Tina a tight hug. “Now go have your baby.”
“Thank you,” Tina said, feeling a sudden knot form in her throat, but not giving in to it. Then she slid the towel under her seat before she stepped inside the SUV.
Zach got into the driver’s side and put his foot on the accelerator. “Are you in pain?”
“I’m having contractions,” she said. “My water broke.”
“That’s why you brought the towel?” he said. She nodded.
“That’s the last thing you need to worry about,” he said.
She shrugged and focused on the pavement in front of them. She felt the moisture seep into the towel. Was it blood? Why was she bleeding? She steeled herself not to panic.
She cleared her throat. “Can you please go a little faster?” she asked. “Not too fast, but faster.”
She felt him shoot a look at her. “Yeah, I can do that. I’ll get you to the hospital.”
“I know you will,” she said and felt herself grow light-headed. Oh, God, she couldn’t lose consciousness. Adrenaline pumping through her, she used her fear to stay awake and aware.
The contractions grew more intense and she struggled to remember the breathing techniques she’d learned during her two private prepared childbirth classes. Drawing deep breaths, she wondered if they would ever get to the hospital. The trip seemed to be taking years. She fought dizziness.
“We’re close,” he said.
She glanced over at Zach. His face was grim and taut. She could easily imagine what was going through his mind, the agony of his memories as his wife and son died on the way to the hospital.
Fear clutched at her. Please let her baby be okay. Please let everything be okay.
She saw the sign for the hospital and a spurt of relief rushed through her. Zach swerved into the half-circle in front of the E.R. entrance.
“Thank you,” she whispered, pulling at her door before the vehicle even stopped.
“Whoa, whoa. Wait,” he said, slamming the car into Park and running around to her side to help her out of the car.
As soon as she stood, Tina wove on her feet. Zach caught her against him, but he must have seen the towel on her seat. “You’re bleeding.”
“Sorry,” she said, but the weakness she’d fought during the drive took over, and everything went black.
Chapter Eighteen
They took Tina away.
The same way they had taken Jenny away.
Zach had an ugly feeling of déjà vu. Why hadn’t she told him she was bleeding? He would have driven faster. He would have gotten her to the hospital sooner.
Pacing from one side of the waiting room to the other, he checked with the receptionist twice. The hospital worker shook her head in sympathy. “I’m sorry, sir. She’s in surgery. Why don’t you go up to the fifth floor waiting room? Someone will give you information as soon as it’s available.”
Zach rode up the elevator, racking his brain for how he could have handled things differently. What could he have done to keep her and the baby safe? Maybe he should have kept a helicopter on call. Maybe he should have kept a nurse at the house.
“Mr. Logan?” a woman in scrubs asked.
He nodded, bracing himself for the worst. “Yes?”
She gave a tentative smile. “You have a baby girl. She’s healthy and screaming her lungs out. As soon as we get her cleaned up, I’ll bring her out to you.”
Zach slumped in relief. “Oh, thank God. Thank God. Tina, she’s okay, right?”
The woman paused. “Dr. McAllister is still working on her. There were complications.”
His gut clenched. “But—”
“He’s doing everything possible, but Miss Devereaux lost a lot of blood. She’s weak, but she’s fighting,” the woman said and patted his arm. “I’ll bring your daughter out soon.”
His mind spinning, Zach sank onto the couch in the waiting room. Tina? Weak? Fighting? Oh, what if he’d lost her? What would he do?
His heart felt as if it was being ripped from his chest. His mind flashed through poignant images of the baby without her precious mother. How would little Kiki survive without her mom?
How would he?
The question shook him to the core. Tina had become as vital to him as oxygen. He couldn’t imagine life without her.
He began to pray, awkward, begging prayers. He didn’t want to lose her. Before he told her that he loved her.
A nurse brought his baby daughter to him. She was wrapped in a flannel blanket and wore a pink cap. He took her soft weight into his arms.
Staring into her little face, he was filled with wonder. She had Tina’s lips and his hairline. Her stubborn chin might give him trouble. Oh, how he wished he could share this moment with Tina. He glanced away for a second, feeling his eyes burn with unshed tears.
The baby screwed up her face and gave a cry. Scared, he surmised. So was he. Zach began to pace, trying to comfort his brand-new daughter and himself.
After a while, a nurse came and took the baby to the nursery. Zach waited. He paced and sat, turned off his cell phone because he couldn’t bear to try to explain the situation. Hours passed and it felt like days.
Sometime in the middle of the night, he leaned his head against his hand as he sat on the waiting room sofa.
“Zachary,” the doctor said.
Zach looked up, fighting fear and dread. “How is she?”
“She’s had a rough time. Stabilizing her was a bit tricky, but she’s going to make it. We’ve put her on a monitor for observation and moved her to a private room.”
“I can’t tell you how grateful I am,” Zach said.
The doctor nodded. “Everyone was rooting for the princess. She’s made an impression on this community.” Dr. McAllister shook his hand. “You can go into her room, but try to let her sleep. She needs her rest. She fought hard. With the way she demanded an epidural the first time I met her, I would have never imagined her to be such a warrior.”
Zach felt his spirits lift a bit. “She’s stronger than she lets on. Can I see her now?”
“Of course,” the doctor said.
Zach went directly to her room. The sight of her so pale, her skin matching the white sheets of the hospital bed, twisted his gut. Monitors beeped in the background. He tried not to give in to his fear, but she was so very, very still.
He wanted to touch her, but more than that, he wanted her to rest. She’d earned it. He resisted the urge to put his hand on her arm and too
k comfort in the steady beat on the monitor.
“Hang on, darlin’,” he whispered. “Kiki and I need you. Kiki and I love you.”
Sinking onto the chair beside her bed, he rested his chin against his hands and watched over her. Looking at her, he realized she’d changed him. She’d forced him, kicking and screaming, out of his tomb of grief. She’d inspired him to look outward instead of focusing inward. She made him want to be different, better.
Hours later, a sound awakened him. He opened his too-dry eyes and saw Tina twisting from side to side. She gave a soft moan. Pain, he suspected. The nurse had told him they’d performed a C-section.
He rose and punched the call button for the nurse. Minutes later, a young man entered the room. “Hey,” he said. “How’s our little mama doing?”
“She seems restless,” Zach said as Tina rolled her head. “Is she hurting?”
The man checked her chart and took her blood pressure. “I bumped up her pain relief so she’ll rest a little longer. When she wakes up, though, she’s going to feel like she’s been run over by a truck.”
“And my face will be the first she’ll see,” Zach said dryly. Zach sank back into the chair and watched over the woman who had stolen his heart.
The sun finally rose the next morning, peeking through the window blinds. Zach rubbed his beard-roughened face and stretched to get the kinks out of his back. His gaze automatically went to Tina. She still looked too pale.
Her eyelids fluttered and Zach stared at her in disbelief. She blinked again, opening her mouth as if she wanted to speak.
Zach jumped from his chair and gently touched her arm.
She stared into his eyes. “Zach,” she whispered. “Our baby. Where is our baby?”
“She’s fine. She’s perfect,” Zach said quietly, his eyes filled with tears.
She closed her eyes and tears ran down her cheeks. “She’s perfect. I knew she would be.”
She drifted off again before he could tell her how much she meant to him. He called the nurse to check on her and she confirmed that Tina was stable.