I reach up and lightly kiss his lips. “I’m.” I kiss them again, this time biting his lower lip. “Sure.”
He grabs me, lifting me off the floor and wrapping my legs around his waist. He carries me into his bedroom and places me on the edge of his bed where he kneels at my feet, removing my shirt and bra. He buries his head in my chest, raining kisses across both breasts before finally taking a nipple into his mouth. I moan again and pull him closer to me. He tilts his head back, and I crush my lips against his.
He wraps my arms around his neck and crawls up onto the bed, taking me with him. Once my head is on the pillow, he removes his shirt and lowers his body onto mine. For a moment he just kisses me, and I wonder if things are going to end here. If I’m okay with them ending here.
A rumbling sound near the bed makes me jump, and Darren pulls back. “It’s the air conditioning unit. It’s old, and it makes a weird sound when it kicks on.”
I laugh at my nerves. Maybe I’m not ready for this after all.
Darren reaches around me and tugs the sheets down. “Get under before you get cold. In a minute, it’s going to feel like the arctic in here.”
I scramble under the sheets. “Why do you set the air so high?”
“My landlord does it. I can’t change the setting. Like I said, the unit is old and it doesn’t exactly work well. It’s either too hot or too cold, and being that it’s summer, I prefer the too cold.”
He joins me under the sheets, but he doesn’t touch me and I can’t help wondering why.
“Did I do something wrong?” I hope I don’t sound my age by asking.
“Not at all. I don’t want to do something wrong. You said you don’t normally do this.”
“You said you don’t either.”
He smiles. “Then I guess we should take this slowly.” He reaches for the button on my shorts.
“Slow is good.” Since both guys I’ve been with only knew one speed, fast, I’m more than willing to take my time and make this last.
Darren kisses me as he slips my shorts off. Even though I’m lying naked in his bed, he doesn’t make a move to remove his pants. Instead, he focuses on me. For the first time ever, a guy just wants to please me. I get lost in his touch, savoring every moment and how it sends my blood coursing through my veins. And when Darren finally does remove his jeans, I can barely hold off any longer. But he makes me wait while he gets a condom. I don’t even have to ask or to remind him why he should wear it. And the moment our bodies connect, it’s like they were meant to be together.
***
Darren strokes my hair as we lay side by side in his bed. There are no words to describe what being with him was like. I’ve never felt this way after sex. Never felt this satisfied and content. All I know is I don’t want to give this up. This feeling, Darren—but I’m lying to him. He thinks I’m his age, that I’m attending Timberland as a grad student. If he finds out, this will all be over. We’ll be over.
I look at the clock on his nightstand. “I should go.”
“Do you have an early class?”
“Eight a.m. My roommate is a morning person.”
“Your roommate’s in the same grad program? That should come in handy for studying.”
I smile, not wanting to add any more lies to the heap. “Um, I should text her to come pick me up.”
“I can drive you home. It’s really no problem.” He sits up and pulls his shirt over his head.
“No, it’s fine. She doesn’t mind.” God, I can hear how lame I sound. I pull my clothes back on in a hurry before he can protest too much. “Can you just give me the address so I can tell her?”
“Sure. It’s 114 Sherman Place, but are you sure about this?”
I text as quickly as my fingers will move. “Yeah. Already sent the text. I don’t live far from here, so she should be here soon.”
My phone chimes. You went back to his place?!
Just hurry up and get here, I reply.
“She’s already on her way.” I cringe, knowing I’m lying again.
“Do you want to maybe get dinner tomorrow?” He fidgets with the bottom of his shirt, and I get the feeling that he’s wondering what our little get together means.
“I’d love to.” I smile, relieved that he wants to see me again and isn’t looking at this as a one-time thing.
We exchange numbers, and Darren says he’ll text me when he gets off work. My phone chimes. I’m here.
“That’s my roommate. I guess I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
Darren walks me to the door and kisses me goodbye, his lips lingering on mine in a way that makes me melt.
“Night,” I say.
“Night.” He opens the door and watches me walk to the car. I give a wave before I get in, and Noelle hits me with a very reproachful stare.
“Just don’t,” I say as we pull out of the driveway. “It’s no different than how you and Andy got together so I don’t want to hear it. Look at you two now. You’re driving his car like it’s your own.”
She eyes me before turning back to the road. “You know most hook-ups don’t end up the way Andy and I did. We’re different.”
“And you don’t think Darren and I might be different, too?” I know the odds are against it, especially with our age difference, but I don’t care. Tonight was amazing. I’m not ready to let that go.
Noelle doesn’t say another word to me until morning. “Still feeling okay with what happened?” she asks as we walk to class.
I give her a look over my travel mug.
“Okay, fine. I won’t mention it again.”
“Thank you.”
We walk into Introduction to Art and I head for the back, but Noelle tugs on my arm. “No way. I need to do well in this class, or my parents are never going to let me declare art as my major.”
“You know this class is going to be a bunch of slides on the big screen. We’ll see just fine from the back.”
“Fine. Then we can also talk about what you did last night since we’ll be far away from the professor.” She smiles at me, knowing she’s won.
“You are so lucky I love you.”
“I know,” she practically sings as she pushes me toward the front of the class. She tries to make me sit in the front row, but I refuse.
“What if the professor is a spitter like Mr. Juskus?” Our senior year Trig teacher couldn’t get out a sentence without soaking the front row.
“Ugh, good point.” Noelle moves back to the third row, and I give in because it’s the best I’m going to get out of her. She walks to the middle of the row, so we’re directly in front of the screen.
“You’re going to make me take notes, too, aren’t you?”
“Yup.”
“You know, you could take notes and let me photo copy them.” I raise my brow at her, but she hugs her notebook to her chest.
“Not happening.”
I finish my coffee and set the mug on the floor by my feet. Professor Monahan—according to my schedule—walks up to a podium at the front of the lecture hall and addresses us, saying that he moves quickly through the slides so we’ll need to pay close attention. Thank you, Noelle, for making me take this stupid class. I give her a look, but she just smiles in response. As Professor Monahan puts the first picture on the screen, I pretend to look like I’m going to take notes by taking out my notebook and a pen, but my mind immediately wanders.
I start thinking about Darren and how different he is. Maybe it’s because he’s older and more experienced, but he seemed to know every place on my body that drives me crazy. I look at the clock on the wall. I have an entire day to get through before I see Darren again, but even if I had to spend every one of those hours listening to Professor Monahan drone on and on about slide after slide, it would be worth it. Darren is my chance to have the kind of relationship Noelle and Andy have.
Even though I slept with Darren the first night I met him, I could tell he cared about making me happy. It wasn’t all about him. And he
wouldn’t have asked me to dinner tonight if he didn’t see some sort of future for us—or at least want to get to know me. I smile, and Noelle nudges my arm. I sit up straight, hoping Professor Monahan didn’t call on me to answer a question. Do they do that in college? But he’s looking up at the back of the lecture hall.
“What?” I mouth to Noelle.
“That.” She points to the back of the room, and I twist to see what’s got her so freaked out.
As I turn around, Professor Monahan says, “Please welcome my new teaching assistant for the semester, Mr. McEntire.”
I freeze.
Holy shit, I slept with my T.A.
Chapter Four
Noelle grabs my hand, squeezing it for support. I turn back around in my seat unable to face Darren, but as he steps up to the podium and scans the classroom, his eyes land on me. By the way he grips the edges of the podium, I know dinner tonight is off. Darren is furious. Grad students don’t take Intro to Art, which means he knows I lied.
I can’t believe I’ve screwed this up already, and this bad. The first guy I really connect with and he turns out to be my T.A.? I want scream. I want to jump out of my seat and tear Darren from this lecture hall. I thought he worked at his parents’ pub. What the hell is he doing here? Did he lie to me, too? My God, maybe everything about last night was one big lie.
No. The way Darren made me feel when he touched me wasn’t fake. It was more real than anything I’ve ever experienced. I can’t give that up. I don’t want to. I stare into Darren’s hazel eyes, which are still locked on me in shock. My T.A.? Seriously?
“So,” Darren says, pausing to clear his throat and most likely his head, too. “If anyone needs extra help or misses a class and needs to get caught up, feel free to come see me.” His eyes finally tear away from mine, and he turns and mumbles something to Professor Monahan, who nods in response. I watch as Darren walks toward the back of the lecture hall and exits, the door making a soft click behind him.
He couldn’t even stay and face me. “I have to go talk to him,” I whisper to Noelle, already getting up from my seat. “Before it’s too late.”
She nods and gives me a half-smile for encouragement. Professor Monahan glares at me as I walk down the aisle, interrupting his lecture, but I don’t care. I have to get to Darren. As soon as the door shuts behind me, I scan the hall. The men’s restroom is by the water fountain. Maybe he ducked in there. I look around, wondering if I’m about to make the stupidest mistake of my college career—well, other than having sex with my T.A. God damn it! I can’t believe my bad luck. I push open the door to the men’s room. Thankfully, with classes in session, the bathroom isn’t occupied. Other than Darren, who’s standing at the last sink in the row.
He furrows his brow at me. I’m sure he’s going to ask what the hell I’m doing in the men’s room, but instead he says, “Grad student, huh?”
“I never said I was a grad student. You did.”
He scoffs. “Oh, okay. So you win that one on a technicality. What about the rest?” He narrows his eyes at me. “How old are you?”
I swallow hard because I know my answer is going to make him hate me even more. “Nineteen.”
“Nineteen?” He runs his fingers through his hair. “I served you alcohol in my father’s pub. Do you have any idea how much trouble I can get in for that? My dad is going to kick my ass for this.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t ask for the wine, and I didn’t know how to tell you I’m only nineteen.”
“So you said nothing?” His eyes widen, and his face turns red.
“You might want to keep your voice down, Mr. McEntire. And speaking of, you never mentioned you’re a T.A. You let me think you just worked at the pub.”
He shakes his head. “My job here didn’t come up, and do you really want to compare that to what you kept from me?”
“You thought I was a grad student. That was the perfect time to mention you were a teacher’s assistant. If you had—”
“What? You would’ve fessed up? Told me you were an undergrad?”
“I would’ve had to.”
“Really? And would that have been before or after we had sex in my apartment?” He clutches the edge of the sink, and I can’t help thinking he’s more angry at himself than me.
“I don’t regret what we did.” Not one bit. Darren made me realize what I was missing where sex was concerned. I finally get why some people crave it. Even looking at Darren now, all agitated, I still just want to tear his clothes off right here in this disgusting public bathroom.
He shakes his head again before leveling me with his hazel eyes. “I could lose my job over this.”
“I’m not going to tell anyone.” Else, at least. Noelle knows, and I’m sure that means Andy knows, too.
“Why should I believe you?”
I step closer, getting a whiff of his cologne and breathing it in. The memory of last night, of being in his bed, comes rushing back, and before I know it, I’ve closed the distance between us and my hand is on his chest.
“Don’t touch me.” His tone is serious, but he doesn’t back away or remove my hand. He’s clenching his jaw, yet leaning into my touch.
I want to erase all the doubts he has about us, remind him how great last night was. I take a huge chance and reach up on my toes to place a kiss on his lips. He doesn’t react at first, so I kiss him again, my tongue teasing his lips until they part for me.
His hands wrap around me, and he deepens the kiss, pulling me to him. But then, just as quickly, he grabs my arms and pushes me away. “We can’t do this.”
“Why not?” It was working well for me.
“Didn’t you hear what I said? I could get fired.”
I want to say “so what?” It’s not like he doesn’t have another job. But I keep my mouth shut because I don’t want to make him angrier.
“I’m sorry, but this has to end. You’re a student in my class, Julia.” His voice is low now, like he’s calmed enough to realize he doesn’t want to be overheard.
“It’s Monahan’s class, not yours.”
He sighs and turns toward the sink again, and I can’t help wondering if it’s because he can’t look at me right now. “You like technicalities, don’t you?”
There are so many things I like. The way his eyes change color depending on what he’s wearing. The way his muscles bulge when he moves. The way his hands feel on my skin. “No one has to know about us. We’re obviously into each other, so why does it have to end just because of some stupid rule?”
He turns and motions to the stalls. “Look where we are. We can’t even be caught talking in public, let alone…” His eyes meet mine as his voice trails off.
“Let alone what?” I lean my body into his.
“Don’t do that. You have no idea what being this close to you does to me.”
Actually, I can feel exactly what it’s doing to him right now. “I’m a student. It’s perfectly normal that I’d go to my T.A. for some extra help.”
“Except what we’re doing has nothing to do with art history.”
“I don’t know.” I press my hand to his chest again. “If last night wasn’t a work of art, then I don’t know what is.”
He laughs. “I can’t argue there, but I also can’t risk this job. I’m sorry, Julia.” This time he steps back, and my hand falls to my side. “Maybe when the semester is over and you’re finished with Monahan’s class.”
Go fifteen weeks without touching him again? I’m not sure I can. “I could always drop the course.”
“Yeah, I bet your parents would love that. How exactly would you explain dropping a course after one day in your first semester of college?”
“Technically, I took summer courses, so…”
He nods. “Another technicality.”
I smile, but the sound of the door opening behind me makes it fade. Darren grabs me and pulls me into a stall with him, locking us inside. Without a word, he picks me up, wrapping my legs around him.
<
br /> “Two pair of feet would look suspicious,” he whispers in my ear.
I’m not about to complain. In fact, I’m going to take advantage of the situation. I bury my head in his neck, kissing him in all my favorite places. He lets out a moan, but quickly stifles it. I smile, knowing I’ve gotten to him, and I pull back so I can look into his eyes. He stares at me for a moment before his eyes lower to my lips. I wait for him to make a move, which he does in a matter of seconds, pulling my lower lip into his mouth.
My fingers weave through his hair and then down his back. Even though he’s supporting my weight, his muscles don’t seem to be struggling at all. His mouth trails down my neck to the bare skin just above the neckline of my sundress. Just like last night, I’m caught up in him, lost in his touch and the way he makes me feel so alive.
I hear the bathroom door close as our visitor leaves. That’s all the encouragement I need. I tug at the button on his pants, and he pauses long enough to realize what I’m doing. His hands slide my sundress up above my waist. So much for rules. But there’s one I’m not willing to break. “Wait. Do you have—?”
He stops kissing me and nods, his hand reaching into his back pocket.
“Do you always carry a condom to class, Mr. McEntire?” I keep my voice playful so he knows I’m only kidding. I suspect just about every guy on campus carries a condom in his wallet.
“I’m not like that,” Darren says, sounding hurt.
“I know you’re not. I was only teasing.” I kiss his neck, trying to make up for killing the mood.
He hesitates for a moment before giving in to his desire. He lowers the straps on my dress one shoulder at a time and seems surprised to find I’m not wearing a bra. His head lowers and I can feel his breath on me, yet he won’t touch me.
“What were you saying about teasing?”
Good Lord! I squeeze his waist with my legs, and he smiles up at me before giving me what I want. I’m so caught up in the moment that I forget we’re in a public restroom. Darren doesn’t take his time like last night. He’s inside me now, rocking me in his arms. I move with him, biting my lip to keep from crying out, knowing someone could walk in on us at any second. The thought sends my heart into such a frenzy until Darren and I are both panting in satisfaction.
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