by Tang Qi
The Sky Palace was very different from Qingqiu and even the Purple Light Palace. Their regulations were strictly adhered to, and their clan’s sacred artifacts never freely lent out. If I were to go to the Sky Palace to meet with the Sky Emperor and ask to borrow this sacred lamp, it would wipe the Ninth Sky’s debt to Qingqiu clean off the abacus. The fact that Ye Hua had lent me the lamp like this touched me deeply. I turned to him, holding the lamp. “You’ve done me such an enormous favor,” I exclaimed. “I worry that this must have incurred you quite a loss. If there’s anything you want in return, all you have to do is say. I will grant you any favor I am able.”
He sat in the chair opposite me, looking tired. He gave a faint frown and said, “There’s nothing I want.”
His expression pulled again at my heartstrings. Before Fourth Brother’s lecture, I could not really explain these strange occasional tugs I had been feeling. But after Fourth Brother’s revelation, I had started to think he might be right and explored my own emotions further. I was already beginning to expand my awareness of how I felt.
The soul-binding lamp was in my hands now. Should I turn around and leave, or stay there and straighten things out with Ye Hua? Perhaps he did not wish to talk, and would rather be left alone there?
I hesitated as I thought it through. “Is there really nothing you want? If so, I will leave now.”
He raised his head sharply and looked at me, his face calm. “You want to know what it is that I want?” he said slowly. “It’s the only thing I have ever wanted.” He looked at me, his face immutable. “Only you.”
I started to tremble. What was happening to me tonight? Hearing those romantic words did not make me feel nauseated, instead they moved me, as did the expression on his face. He was handsome at the best of times, and when he said beautiful things like that, who could possibly have resisted him? Under his deep gaze, I heard some words escape my mouth.
It took me a moment to realize what I had just said. When I did, I wanted to drop down into a deep pit and be buried in the center of the earth.
The words that had escaped my mouth had been “Would you like to spend a night of intimacy with me?”
I recovered my wits before Ye Hua had recovered his. With my face flame red, I packed away the lamp and went to leave, but Ye Hua came over before I got to the doorway and was holding me from behind.
I lifted my head to the rafters, wanting to just fall down dead from the shame. The alcohol fumes surrounding Ye Hua gave me spell after spell of dizziness, and he held me so tightly that it made all my regret disappear. All I felt was a brilliant peach blossom haze, as if my soul had left my body. My soul might actually have left my body, because I followed up with more audacious words.
“It’s rather indecent to just do this in the doorway. Shall we just move to the bed?” I cast a spell and changed my body back into its female form . . .
I woke up in the middle of the night with my head in such a confused state it felt as if someone had replaced it with a big wok of rice porridge. Ye Hua must have cast a spell to shield some of the night pearl’s glow. He had me in his arms, holding me tightly against his chest, and my face was resting against his long scar.
I thought back over our night of union, but all I could remember was the fluttering of the bed curtain. After all the physical excitement, I had floated into a hazy sleep in which I vaguely remember him saying, “If I only have you completely this one time, if only for tonight, even if you are just doing it to get the soul-binding lamp for Mo Yuan, I still have no regrets.” I think that was what he said. I did not hear his words clearly, and because of those strange, disjointed voices and hallucinations earlier, I no longer completely trusted my own brain.
Unfortunately, being with him like that did not give me the kind of clarity that the beautiful women in my play scripts experienced, and for the first time I wondered if these mortal-world plays painted an overly simplistic picture.
Ye Hua was fast asleep still, but after waking suddenly like that, I was unable to drift back off. As I ran my hand down his chest scar, I suddenly remembered something I had heard.
There was a rumor that three hundred years ago, the Shark Clan from the Southern Sea had sent their troops out to revolt, vying for independence. Unable to hold them off, the Southern Sea Water Emperor sent a letter to the Nine Skies, pleading for his help. The Sky Emperor put Ye Hua in command of the army he sent to quash the unrest. But the Shark Clan had fought with unexpected bravery and ferocity, and during this Southern Sea battle, Ye Hua was almost killed.
I had remained in Qingqiu for so long without leaving that I knew little about this event, and it was only today that I was reminded of it. When I finally awoke from my great slumber following the battle with Qing Cang, Fourth Brother had mentioned it a couple of times, wringing his hands in anguish each time he recalled it, a pained expression on his face. “Can you believe that Shark Clan, revolting like that without rhyme or reason? This younger generation of immortals is becoming increasingly unruly. The Shark Clan was such a fine specimen of immortals, and because of this their entire clan has been destroyed. But they almost turned the young Nine Skies heir into dust flying and flames dying, and they paid the price.”
Sometimes Fourth Brother’s incessant chatter used to exhaust me, but it was thanks to him that I knew a few things about Ye Hua’s impressive military might. Any battle waged in the Four Seas and Eight Deserts over the last twenty thousand to thirty thousand years in which Ye Hua was in command, the troops seemed invincible, obliterating everything in their path. Ye Hua’s almost fatal blow at the hands of the Shark Clan had come as a shock to everyone, Fourth Brother in particular.
Ye Hua woke up as I was pondering all this. He looked down at me. “Why are you awake?” he asked quietly. “Aren’t you tired?”
I had never been good at keeping my questions in my head. I stroked the prominent scar on his chest before my question inevitably popped out.
He clung to my arm, and his voice floated over, sounding desolate. “Please don’t mention that battle. Their whole clan was destroyed, and I didn’t get what I wanted. Both sides ended up suffering greatly.”
“You nearly died in the Southern Sea,” I said, giving him a bright smile. “You should be happy that you survived. What else did you want?”
“If I hadn’t thrown the fight, do you think there was a chance they would have been able to harm me?”
A loud boom resonated from within my head.
“Thr-thrown the fight? You put your life at risk on purpose?”
He clasped my arm tightly. “It was just to trick the Sky Emperor,” he explained.
“So you were trying to feign death?” I said, thinking I understood, before starting to feel confused again. “But why would you want to lose your reputation as the undefeated-in-battle heir to the Sky Throne? Why on earth would you want to feign death?”
For a long time he said nothing, and I started to wonder if he might have drifted off to sleep once more. But he suddenly looked down at me, and in a bitter voice he said, “I never knew what envy felt like until I felt it for my second uncle, Sang Ji.”
His alcohol tolerance was obviously not as good as I had thought. He had consumed four or five jars of wine earlier, and while he had seemed fairly clearheaded earlier, he was now talking as if he were drunk. He was not usually a big talker, but as soon as he had mentioned the Sky Emperor’s second son, Sang Ji, the floodgates opened, and a barrage of words flooded out. I imagined that all those jars’ worth of wine must have finally reached his head.
During this ramble he revealed a surprising piece of gossip about the way in which Sang Ji and Shao Xin had eloped, and I listened with rapt interest. I lay in his arms, listening in fascination, racing ahead, trying to fill in the gaps in his story, and ending up quite confused.
All I had known previously was that after stealing Shao Xin away, Sang Ji had gone to the Sky Emperor’s court and knelt down before him. He had made such a fuss about the
affair that before nightfall the whole of the Four Seas and Eight Deserts knew about it. This had been extremely humiliating for our Qingqiu clan and had enraged Father, Mother, and my older brothers. But before hearing Ye Hua talk about it, I had been unaware of all the twists and turns that had led up to this pivotal event.
Sang Ji was utterly in love with Shao Xin, and taking her to the Ninth Sky was a grand gesture of his deep affection. Sang Ji had always enjoyed the benefits of being the Sky Emperor’s favorite son. He thought that if he expressed his true love for Shao Xin, he could win over his father, who would give the devoted young couple his blessing.
But instead Sang Ji’s declaration of his affection for Shao Xin provoked catastrophe. The Sky Emperor refused to give his blessing and felt extremely humiliated by the fact that his second son had fallen in love with a ba snake. Not only this, his son’s actions had also caused terrible humiliation for the Qingqiu goddess and were likely to have repercussions for the friendship between the Sky Clan and the Qingqiu Nine-Tailed White Fox Clan.
The Sky Emperor was not yet aware that his son had been brazen enough to leave a letter in the foxhole, breaking off the engagement. He was still hoping that for the sake of these two clans’ friendship, he might be able to resolve things, covering up the hornet’s nest that his second son had stirred up. One bright and clear afternoon, the Sky Emperor came to a decision. He grabbed Shao Xin, who doting Sang Ji had ensured had been treated very well in the Ninth Sky up until that point, and locked her up in the demon tower.
Sang Ji was extremely upset when he found out what his father had done. He rushed to the Sky Emperor’s bedchamber and knelt down outside it for two whole days, until his knees were covered in bruises. All he had managed to get out of the Sky Emperor was that the little ba snake was just a good-for-nothing demon spirit who not only had the audacity to seduce the Sky Emperor’s second son, but had also caused huge waves during peacetime. According to the sky regulations, her punishment should have been having her spiritually cultivated energy destroyed and being banished to the mortal world, never to rise back up as an immortal.
Sang Ji was just a prince and powerless against his father’s awe and majesty. He had no idea how to save Shao Xin. He reached such depths of despair that he eventually threatened to kill himself. He begged to be allowed to go down to the mortal world with Shao Xin so that the two of them could be together. He was willing to sacrifice his life to be with Shao Xin, turn to ashes and dust if that was what it took to be alongside her.
Sang Ji’s declaration was so full of desperation and melancholy that all in the Ninth Sky who heard it would start to weep. But the Sky Emperor, being the Sky Emperor and the head of the Sky Clan, had his ways of dealing with things, and he destroyed Sang Ji with a few simple words.
“If you wish to take your life, I won’t stop you,” he said. “But it will leave me with the life of your little ba snake in my hands. Go ahead and destroy your own soul, but know that as soon as you have turned to ash flying and flames dying, I will devote myself to tormenting your little ba snake. I will inflict so much pain and suffering onto her that she won’t know whether to beg for her life or the sweet release of death.”
Sang Ji was still in a complete state, but he made no more mention about dying in the name of love; he just sat in desolation in his palace. The Sky Emperor was relieved to see that Sang Ji had finally calmed down, and his mind moved away from dealing with this unfortunate event and on to new matters. As soon as his back was turned, Sang Ji, who had only been acting desolate and resigned, took advantage of a loophole. He burst into the Sky Emperor’s court and knelt down before him, causing such a hullabaloo that in no time at all everyone between the sky and earth knew what had happened.
It was at that point Zhe Yan and my parents had come up to the Ninth Sky, seeking justice. If Sang Ji had not turned this into such a public and high-profile matter, the Sky Emperor could have quietly dealt with Shao Xin as he wished without anyone being any wiser. But now everyone was talking about it, and while the Sky Emperor had every right to exclude Shao Xin from any special favors within the Sky Palace, she had not done anything that could justify him punishing her with death. The Sky Emperor had his hands tied. He had no choice but to release Shao Xin and banish Sang Ji, thus allowing the two of them to be together.
“Sang Ji asked for clemency and received it,” Ye Hua explained. “It was a rocky road, but in the end he got what he wanted. The Sky Emperor still doted on him, but there was no longer any question of him being heir to the Sky Throne. He was free from the shackles of that title. He had earned his freedom, his utter freedom.”
I hugged his arm and gave a yawn. “What about you?” I asked.
“Me?” he said at last. “When I was born, seventy-two multicolored birds spiraled around the rafters and a hazy light shone over the East for three whole years. Mo Yuan was the only other god whose birth was marked with such honor and respect. The Sky Emperor saw the unprecedented glory surrounding my birth and named me heir to the throne straightaway, although it was only when I turned fifty thousand that I was given my official heir ceremony. All the time I was growing up, I knew that Bai Qian from Qingqiu would one day be my wife.”
I had not been aware that his birth was such a spectacle. “Were you not curious about me when you were younger?” I wondered out loud. “What would you have done if you hadn’t wanted me as your wife?”
He was quiet and hugged me even tighter. “If it hadn’t been Bai Qian from Qingqiu I’d fallen in love with,” he began slowly, “I would have tricked the audience of pedantic old sky immortals into thinking I had turned to dust flying and flames dying and left the Three Realms and the Five Phases to find a completely new place to live happily and nurture my love.”
All this talk was making me dazed and sleepy. I gave an admiring sigh about the lucky way that things had worked out. “Fortunately you did fall in love with Bai Qian from Qingqiu,” I said, pulling up the cloud quilt, finding a comfortable position in his arms, and falling back asleep.
Halfway between sleep and waking, I suddenly heard him say, “Qian Qian, if anyone tried to seize your eyes and left you unable to see, would you be able to forgive them?”
I was thrown by the oddness of the question. “There’s no one in the whole of the Four Seas and Eight Deserts who would dare to try it!” I said flippantly, feeling confused.
He was silent for a long time. Just as I was drifting back off, he said, “What if that person was me?”
I touched my eyes, still very much within their sockets, feeling completely thrown by his crazy words. I hugged his arm. “I am afraid it would mean the end of our relationship,” I said casually.
“You really don’t remember, do you?” he said.
“Remember what?” I asked, not understanding the grave tone in his voice.
“A long time ago, before I had been officially named heir, I was sent to the mortal world to slay a red-and-gold-flamed lion beast,” Ye Hua said. “I was able to slay it, but I was badly wounded. So badly, in fact, that I turned into a small dragon. While recovering, I found a small thatched hut on Junji Mountain and fell into a deep sleep. When I awoke, I saw a woman with a beautiful face. She wore white clothes, and for many weeks she cared for me as a dragon. At night, while she slept, I would turn into a human and hold her in my arms.”
Ye Hua paused. I thought he might be worried that I would be jealous of this woman, but strangely I was not. His words seemed to stir something in my mind, but I said nothing, and he continued.
“One day while I was with her on Junji Mountain, she brought home a crow and kept it as a pet along with me. I couldn’t bear having to share her attention, so when her back was turned, I changed back into a man, summoned a cloud, and returned to the Ninth Sky. But I couldn’t stop thinking about her, so I set a plan in motion.” Ye Hua paused again, but still I said nothing. My mind was clouded with strange thoughts, but I couldn’t make them out.
Ye Hua spoke again. �
��I cast a barrier around the mountain so no one from the Ninth Sky could see, and then I returned to her, this time as a man. I cast a spell on myself so it looked like I was gravely wounded. I appeared in front of her, and she did her best to save me. I let her nurse me back to health even though I had been fine all along. When I had healed, I told her that I must repay her for her kindness. She asked me to repay her with my body, and we were married in the mortal world.”
Ye Hua fell silent.
“Go on,” I said before I even realized it. It felt like I was in a trance. I felt no jealousy. I wasn’t even surprised at Ye Hua’s trickery. All of it seemed so strangely familiar.
“I had fallen in love with this woman. I did not wish to be heir anymore. I wanted to stay on the mountain with her. This scar,” Ye Hua said as he ran a finger down the scar from the battle against the Shark Clan, “is the result of my deception of the Sky Emperor. When the Shark Clan revolted, I was dispatched to fight against them. I let their chief gravely wound me to make it look like dust flying and flames dying. My plan was to make the Sky Emperor believe this and then return to the mountain to be with her. But while I was gone from the mountain fighting the Shark Clan, she ran away, breaking through the barrier I had cast that shielded us from the eyes of the sky realm. The Sky Emperor saw that she was pregnant with my child. There was no way to escape our fate. I abandoned the plan to feign dust flying and flames dying. The Sky Emperor summoned her to the Ninth Sky to have my child, but I was wary of him after the way he had treated Shao Xin and Sang Ji. I had to be very cold to her. I couldn’t let the Sky Emperor know that we were in love.”
Ye Hua spoke calmly so as not to upset me, but I was strangely numb.
“What happened to her?” I asked.
“The Sky Emperor could not be fooled,” Ye Hua said. “He sent me away to fight, and then . . .”