I felt the corner of my mouth tip up, as I envisioned Jayden having a temper tantrum about getting stuck with me as her tutor. We’d reached my house, and I sat on the front step. If we went inside, the conversation would end, but now I was curious. “Why would she think I was anything more than—what’d you call me? A box of rocks?”
“Because Becca isn’t stupid. She’s the one who pointed out that all your classes were in the AP end of the senior hall. If she noticed, I’m positive that others have, too. I doubt you have as many people fooled as you think. Or any teachers, for that matter. Mr. Adams seemed relieved that such a ‘good kid’ had asked his daughter to the dance.” Jayden used air quotes around the words good kid.
I think I might have blushed. “I don’t try to hide it from my teachers. It doesn’t make much sense. They’ll find out the truth when they grade my papers.”
“It doesn’t make sense at all,” Jayden said brusquely. “But if you don’t agree, look at it from the other side. Bianca was super rude to you at lunch. She made it sound like she was teasing, but there was truth behind her words. Her truth, at least. Is she always like that to you?”
“She’s not always rude, but I am most often the butt of her jokes. It’s not like she only picks on me, though.” To an outsider like Jayden, that’s probably exactly what it looked like.
“Mike.” Jayden stared at me like I was pathetic. “That’s exactly what it looks like.” I almost laughed when she repeated my thought verbatim. But for once she was acting more protective over me than mad at me. And that felt kind of nice, so I let it her continue. “She picks on you because you act and talk like a total tool. You don’t have to get physically abused to be bullied.”
“Calling Bianca a bully is a pretty heavy accusation. She doesn’t bully me any more than you do.”
“I don’t bully you,” Jayden insisted. “But even so, you and I are friends. We have an understanding. Do you honestly consider Bianca your friend?”
“Yes,” I replied a little hesitantly. I did consider us friends, even though we were more like friends by default because of Brady, Cam, and Beth.
“Fine. If that makes you feel better, you can have your kind-of friendship. All I’m saying is that she wouldn’t razz you if she knew she couldn’t keep up with you.”
“Bianca isn’t dumb.”
“Maybe not. But is she smarter than you?”
No way, I thought, but didn’t say it out loud because that would make me feel as conceited as Jayden sounded. Plus, it’d make her think she was right, which was a concession I wouldn’t give. Even if she was.
“That’s what I thought,” she said, barely waiting for an answer.
“Let’s say you’re right, and nobody would care. I can’t just turn it off. The way I am at school is a habit now. I’ve been doing it for so long, it feels natural.”
“That’s a poor excuse, if I ever heard one. You turn it off just fine when you’re with me. I honestly think you like turning it off. I think it’s a relief for you to act normal. And if you deny it, you’re a liar. You’re just a big, fat chicken. Besides, if you let people know the real you and they don’t like it, then they don’t deserve you.” Jayden shrugged nonchalantly.
Deserve me? She’d said it like I was worth something to her. Even though she’d been lecturing me when it came out, and harshly at that. Regardless, it made something stir in my gut. “Do you think you deserve me?” I asked.
“Yes, because I’m a good friend.”
“A good friend would accept someone the way they are.”
“I have accepted you the way you are. I accept the real you.”
Man, she was frustrating me. I was beginning to realize I couldn’t win this argument. And I hated that she was making sense. The likelihood that anyone would bully me at this point was slim. I was a three-sport varsity athlete who hung out with the popular crowd. If anyone turned on me, it’d probably be one of them. Except I wasn’t a skinny runt anymore, so even if they did, I could hold my own this time.
I quietly pondered the what-ifs associated with Jayden’s come clean campaign. She must have assumed I was upset, because she moved closer, until we were touching at the hip. Then she hooked her arm through mine and laid her head on my shoulder. “I know you’re…apprehensive. So, if you don’t want to give up the act completely, will you at least tone it down when I’m around? As a favor to your excellent friend.” Her voice had gone from bossy and demanding to soft and pleading.
I chuckled. “Are you trying to manipulate me again?”
Jayden kept her head on my shoulder but peered up at me through her long eyelashes. The gesture put our faces close enough that I could feel her breath on my neck. “Is it working?” she asked with an innocent smile. Her lashes fluttered, and so did my chest.
“Maybe.” My answer was almost a whisper. My eyes locked on her shiny pink lips, and the desire to steal a taste of her lip gloss consumed my sense of reason. What was happening to me? Ten minutes ago, I wanted to shake her silly. Now, I wanted to kiss her silly. My heart sped up as our eyes connected. Half a second slowed down to minutes in my brain, as I carefully weighed the risks of placating my hormones.
I’d almost convinced myself to do it, when the TV blared to life on the other side of the wall, the volume at a deafening level. The twins started shrieking, and Jayden lifted her head to look at the front door. “I suppose we left them unsupervised a little too long.” She laughed.
“Sadly, any time unsupervised is too long with those troublemakers.” I sighed, relieved that I’d been interrupted before I’d done something stupid and reckless.
If I’d kissed Jayden, I couldn’t take it back. And I was finally starting to get along with her. It was almost like we were real friends. I needed people like her in my life, even if she did drive me nuts half the time. I needed to be challenged. Kissing her would throw everything we’d accomplished out the window. At best, it would make things awkward; at worst, it would ruin our tentative relationship. Plus, I’d likely have gotten myself slapped.
We went inside to find the twins huddled together on the couch, covering their ears. I walked to the TV and pushed the power button. “Why didn’t you just turn it off?” I asked.
“Because we couldn’t find the remote.” Jackson frowned.
“You can turn it off without the remote,” I said. They looked at me as if I’d sprouted an extra eye. “Never mind. If I check your homework right now, will I find it all the way finished?” They hopped up and ran into the kitchen without a word.
“Should we try to study?” Jayden asked.
“Yes, but I don’t know how productive it’ll be.” We sat on the couch and pulled out our Spanish books. Then I asked, “What should we work on today?”
“I’m not sure,” she replied. “It would help if I knew what the next quiz would be on.”
I grinned like a fool with a secret, because that’s what I was. “You’re in luck. I happen to have that information.”
Jayden narrowed her eyes. “How did you get it?”
“Let’s just say there are advantages to being Mr. T’s favorite student.”
“Or he feels sorry for you because he knows what a pain in the butt I am.”
“Maybe a little of that, too.”
“Okay, wise guy. What’s the quiz on?”
“Vocab.”
“That’s it? You don’t know which topics? General vocab is pretty broad.”
“Yes, I know the topic. But you have to ask nicely.”
“Please?” Jayden asked.
“You can do better than that,” I encouraged her.
“Pretty please?”
“That was barely better. Try again.”
Jayden slammed her book shut and gave me the sassy face. “You obviously have something specific in mind. Why don’t you tell me how I should ask so that I don’t waste all afternoon guessing?”
I didn’t have something specific in mind, but if she was giving me carte blanche, I
should think of something good. I racked my brain for a second, then said, “Repeat after me. Mike, you’re the most wonderful tutor in the whole-wide world. I desperately need you. Will you please tell me what the quiz is on?”
Jayden snorted. “You can’t be serious.”
I smirked. “Why not? It’s true, isn’t it?”
“That’s debatable. But since we both know you’re being ridiculous, I see no harm in humoring you. Mike, you’re the most wonderful tutor in the whole-wide world. I desperately need you. Will you please tell me what the quiz is on?”
I scrunched up my face. “That was good, but it lacked emotion. Try saying, I desperately need you…” I emphasized the words desperately and need dramatically, and she lifted her textbook to hit me with it. “I’m kidding!” I yelped, as I covered my head with my arms. “The quiz is on vocabulary. Specifically, emotions and terms of endearment.”
“No, it’s not. You’re just trying to get me to say I desperately need you in Spanish.”
“I wish I was that clever. That’s really what it’s on. Honest.”
“How does he expect me to find all the emotion words? They’ve been spread out across every chapter.”
I reached up and tapped the side of her head with my index finger. “You’re a bright girl. Think about it. There’s an excellent resource for this type of thing. Here’s a hint. It starts with a gloss and ends with an -ary.”
“Thanks, smart-ass,” Jayden quipped, then slapped her hand over her mouth.
“Uh oh, you just said a naughty word!” I teased at the same time Joy emerged from the kitchen, her mouth agape.
“Jayden! Did you just say a…?” she started to ask in shock.
“Anna-Joy!” I cut her off sternly.
“But she just said a bad word,” Joy insisted before scolding Jayden, who still had her hand over her mouth. “You’re lucky Mommy isn’t home, or she’d put you in time-out for ten whole minutes. That means you have to sit on the stool and face the corner. And you can’t even talk. It’s the worst!”
Jayden took her hand from her mouth and apologized. “I’m so sorry, Joy. I don’t normally say bad words. But Mike was bugging me, and he made me so annoyed that it just slipped out. It will never happen again.”
“Promise?” Joy narrowed her eyes.
“Cross my heart,” Jayden answered, making an X over her chest.
“Okay, I won’t tell Mom,” she agreed, then grinned impishly. “Besides, sometimes I want to call Mike a bad word, too, whenever he makes us have a healthy snack.” Joy quickly returned to the kitchen before I could yell at her, and Jayden erupted in a fit of giggles.
“You think that’s funny, huh?”
“No. I think it’s hilarious.”
Two could play this game. “Oh yeah? Why don’t you tell me how you really feel…” I ordered, then paused for effect. “Using emotion words—en español, por favor—in Spanish please.”
JAYDEN
Yesterday could have been an episode of Stranger Things—well, without the monsters and the awesome soundtrack. But that’s how freaked out I was—like Demogorgon freaked out—for approximately three very long seconds. You know that moment when you make eye contact with a guy and you’re sitting close and your heart is racing because you think he’s going to kiss you? Yeah, I had one of those moments. They say stranger things have happened, but in this case, there is nothing stranger than me sharing an almost-kiss with Mike McGinnes.
The craziest part is, if he’d actually kissed me, I totally would have let him. I’m not sure how we got to that point; it all happened so fast. One minute I was lecturing him, and then the next I had my head on his shoulder, intoxicated by his cologne, noticing how soft his lips looked and how his breath smelled minty. Maybe I’m delusional, maybe I was hallucinating yesterday, but one thing I’m not is wishful thinking. It had to have happened the way I remember it. Because no way, in a million years, would I intentionally think about kissing Mike. Except when he rolls his R’s—but that doesn’t count. So why was I thinking about kissing him right now? More importantly, why couldn’t I stop thinking about it?
Neither of us had mentioned the weird moment afterward. I was pretending it didn’t happen, to avoid things getting awkward. I was guessing that was his plan as well. Unless he hadn’t wanted to kiss me and the whole thing really was in my head, in which case I needed to be committed to the nearest mental health facility.
I was in the car the next morning, on my way to school with Summer and the guys when my phone dinged, receiving a text message.
Mike: Quiz time… (winky emoji)
I assumed Mike wanted me to supply the appropriate emotion, but the winky emoji wasn’t calling up anything obvious to me. Logan was reading my screen over my shoulder. “Who’s Mike?” he asked. “And why is he winking at you?”
I thought about saying noneya, because it would have been both appropriate and funny, though a bit hypocritical. Instead, I answered, “He’s a friend.” Then I asked out loud, to nobody in particular, “If someone sends you a winky emoji, what emotion or feeling would you think they’re trying to convey?”
“Playful,” Levi suggested.
“I was thinking mischievous, but playful is probably better,” Summer said.
“What about frisky?” Hunter replied suggestively.
“That’s the emoji I send girls when I’m feeling a little frisky,” Lucas added. He held out his fist, and Hunter bumped it in a grand display of moronic chauvinism.
“He sends it to guys, too,” Logan muttered loudly, and I snorted.
“I heard that,” Lucas called from the front.
“You were supposed to,” Logan called back. Then he grinned and nudged me in the side, waiting for me to give him props.
“Nice one,” I whispered.
Logan beamed with pride, and I went back to answering my text quiz. Since I wasn’t sure how to say frisky or mischievous, I went with playful.
Jayden: juguetón?
Mike: That works, but I was looking for coqueto—flirtatious
Jayden: Send me something with less versatility. Something obvious.
Mike: How about…(Kissy face emoji)
My breath hitched, and I felt my face flush. Was this a reference to yesterday, or was the emoji merely a coincidence? I had asked for something obvious.
“Why is he blowing you kisses now?” Logan asked. Boy, he was nosy.
“He’s not blowing me kisses. We’re studying.”
“What the hell kind of studying is that?”
“The language of love.” Summer giggled as she snuggled into Levi’s side.
“Correction—the language of Spanish,” I said.
“That’s a love language,” Summer argued.
“Technically, it’s a romance language.”
“Same difference.” Summer waved her hand at me.
“No, totally different,” I corrected her.
“I’m still trying to figure out what emojis have to do with Spanish?” Logan puzzled. His tone was terse, and if I didn’t know better, I’d have thought he was jealous.
“I’m still trying to figure out why you’re reading my private text messages.” I replied, my own tone a warning.
“And now I’m trying to figure out why you feel the need to hide them?” Logan bated me with a raised eyebrow.
“I’m not trying to hide them.”
“Then why don’t you want me to read them?”
“’Cause, it’s noneya.” I couldn’t help it; the nonsense word just slipped out.
“Noneya?” Summer asked in confusion.
“As in noneya bizz-ness.” I said it the way Mike would have, then felt a sense of satisfaction when Logan looked at me like I’d gone bonkers. In his defense, it was extremely out of character for me.
Summer laughed. “Ha. That’s funny.” Logan continued to glare, but he let it drop. I returned to my quiz question and answered it without help. This one was easy.
Jayden: amor—l
ove
Mike: And what’s the action?
Jayden: The quiz is on vocab, not verbs
Mike: Just answer the question.
Jayden: besar—to kiss
Mike: Correct. Now a term of endearment.
Jayden: This is going beyond necessity.
Mike: Do it woman!!!
Jayden: Fine, mi novia—my girlfriend or mi amor—my love
Mike: Excellent. For the record, I’d have also accepted libidinoso or despertado
Jayden: What do those mean?
Mike: They basically mean horny. There isn’t a direct translation for that one (winky emoji)
Jayden: Pervert
Mike: I’m not being perverted, this is a teaching moment. You could say corneo, but that means literally horny, like having horns, so you’d be saying it wrong.
Jayden: Nice try. You’re still a pervert.
Mike: I’m not saying or thinking things that any other normal guy wouldn’t.
Jayden: That’s because all guys are perverts.
Mike: You might be right.
Jayden: I’m always right.
“Just a friend, my ass. The guy’s totally hitting on you.” I’d been caught up in the conversation and failed to notice that Logan was back to snooping over my shoulder.
“Don’t be stupid. I told you, we’re just friends.”
“Don’t be naïve. I’m 90 percent sure he doesn’t think you’re just friends.” Logan sounded super annoyed now. He was overreacting because he didn’t understand the situation. He put his earbuds in and buried his nose in his phone. Somehow, I felt responsible for the backslide. At least when his nose was buried in my phone, it showed that he was paying attention to me. And that’s all I’d ever wanted from him, really. Though, if this was his way of showing an interest in the things I liked, he needed some tutoring of his own.
The next text came while I was at my locker before first hour.
Mike: Last one was too easy, think outside the box on this one…(crying emoji)
Jayden: So not sad?
Mike: Not sad.
A list of synonyms for the word sad ran through my mind—melancholy, gloomy, bummed, depressed. Or it could be another emotion for which one cried, even though they weren’t sad. But that option gave me too many choices, and after extensive self-debate, I settled on disappointed.
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