by Ashley, Ava
Liam sits down next to Heather as the show starts. It’s like a home video, but a high-quality one taped by someone who knows what they’re doing.
“There’s our boy!” Liam says.
Michael Bryant doesn’t waste much time before he announces a second guest. I watch in surprise as Mariaso struts across the stage and extends a hand to Rafe.
“Don’t take it!” I say. I wouldn’t trust that guy for anything. But Rafe shakes his hand. The two fighters stare each other down and then start trash talking as Mariaso takes a seat on the other side of the host’s desk.
It isn’t long before things get heated and Mariaso storms off the stage.
Michael Bryant feigns a shocked expression, but he’s not fooling anyone. That was planned, or at least expected. Rafe is shaking his head, laughing.
“Guess he can’t take a little heat.” Rafe leans back like he’s completely relaxed. “But all this talk won’t mean anything. We’ll sort it out in the cage soon enough.”
“Now that’s the spirit!” Michael slaps his desk. “You’ve been doing something else lately, haven’t you? Something outside of the cage? Involving these two ladies?” As he speaks, Melinda and Samantha walk onto the stage. When the camera goes back out, there are more chairs on stage for them. Rafe moves over a chair, away from Michael, so there are two empty chairs on either side of him.
Mel’s wearing a blue low-cut, revealing dress, and she went super heavy on the makeup. Her hair’s done up like she’s going to prom.
Sam went with a dark green satin dress and flat-ironed hair. Her dress is longer and she’s wearing glittery heels that catch my attention. She looks classy compared to Mel... and I still don’t like seeing her with Rafe, especially when I see Rafe’s hand envelop her tiny waist when he gives her a quick hug before she sits down.
I suck in my breath before I can stop myself. I don’t want everyone knowing how much it bothers me to see them there with him. I want to support him!
“Yeah, Michael, this is... Melinda... and Samantha. They won a competition on our dating show today.”
“Dating show?” Michael asks, even though he knows all about it. “Does that have a name?”
“Win the Alpha.”
“And you’re the alpha?”
Rafe holds his hands out in mock apology while Mel and Samantha both try to run their hand down his arms.
“So, Rafe, do you need a show to get a date?”
“Hey now, training and fighting keep me busy.”
“And what do these ladies think of the show? Are you going at each other’s necks trying to win Rafe over?”
“No, not at all. Mel and I are friends,” Samantha answers. Mel’s eyes slide her way but she quickly smiles for the audience and cameras.
“That’s so sweet.” Michael turns to the audience and they make the appropriate “ahh” noises. “So, if one of you wins this dating show, are you going to all of Rafe’s fights?”
“Of course!” Mel chirps as she slides her arm through Rafe’s. “And I’m going to win.” She looks up at Rafe with a surly smile.
“So Melinda Heart, you’re not worried about your own career?”
Mel tsks at him and leans closer. “We’re not in the Dark Ages anymore, Michael! A woman can have a career and support her man. Rafe wants a strong woman with her own life, don’t you?”
“Of course,” Rafe responds. “I want a woman who’ll stand up to me and have my back.”
Mel leans her head on his shoulder for a second, then Michael jumps into questions for them.
But my head is spinning from his comment. Was that directed at me? Does Rafe believe I won’t have his back, because I left before? My stomach fills with a cold dread. I wonder how I’m going to prove to him that I can stick around when things are hard. You’d think being on Win the Alpha would show him how much I want to win his heart again, and how far I’m willing go to. Here I am battling it out with these women and worst of all, Mel, and facing public humiliation if I lose.
The shot pans out so we can see all three of them and I notice Mel is smirking. She ducks her head to hide it, though, just as Samantha says, “Well, the last few women aren’t really cut out to make it.” She turns to Rafe. “Did you know Lily was a stripper? Or maybe she still is.”
What the hell?
The words bounce around in my head. Did I hear her right? Why would they let her say that? I try to convince myself I misheard her, but a quick glance around me reveals a room of surprised faces. They all look away quickly. I try to breathe, to keep my face from turning blazing red, but there’s no stopping it.
Red-hot anger shoots through me, followed by a cold, nervous chill. There’s the public humiliation right there.
If this comes out publically, there could be things circulating online. What would happen with school? I picture trying to find a job later on with that following me around. This could go even beyond that. If I’m with Rafe, would it hurt him and his career?
Quiet falls over the show. Rafe stiffens and his expression hardens. His anger feels like a physical thing, spreading through the audience and freezing them in place.
“What the fuck does that matter?” he demands. Samantha pulls back, stung. Mel looks stunned too. “Who cares what Lily has or hasn’t done? She did what she had to for her mom.”
I love that man. It’s like I’m back in our old neighborhood and Rafe is protecting me again. But he’s a grown man now, and the guilt that flashes through his eyes steals my breath away. Even after all this time, after all he risked to protect me, he still feels responsible for the choices I made, and the weight of that realization nearly crushes me. It’s still quiet on the show and in the room. I can feel the others staring at me, so I focus on the screen. I haven’t said a word to Kara about Mel seeing me on the beach or what she said. It’s been on my mind, though, like an itch. Like a giant rash, actually. I want to ask her if she talked to Mel, but a big part of me doesn’t want to know. The only reason... Kara was awake when I left. Maybe she got jealous and decided to get Mel involved.
Finally, I glance at Kara. She looks upset for me, not worried that I’ll blow up at her.
“No one has any right to ever put her down,” Rafe adds, rising to his feet and walking off the stage. Liam sucks in his breath in an excited whistle, rubbing his hands together.
“Wow,” Kara whispers next to me, and when I glance over this time her expression stops me. Maybe what I’m thinking isn’t too crazy. Maybe Rafe is falling for me again. At the very least, he still wants to protect me. He’s still Rafe. And he just put himself out there for me again.
“They won’t air that part, will they?” I ask Liam.
“Why not?” Heather throws in, her arms crossed.
“Because it’s not going to help the rating for Men’s Minutes or get viewers for this show.”
“Oh, yes it will!” Mike says from behind me. I’d forgotten he came in.
I turn to Liam and wait for an answer.
“It’s their call, really, but no, they won’t want to air the show with two guests walking out.” He gets up slowly and rubs his hands together.
I get up too and walk out of the room. Liam calls my name but I ignore him. I need some air. Kara catches up to me as I head outside.
“Wow, heavy shit there.” She stays with me as I walk through the pool area and out onto the beach. “You okay?”
“I bet Mel put her up to that.” It’s not exactly what’s on my mind but so many things are running around in my head. I want a woman who’ll stand up to me and have my back. Does he think Mel would have his back?
“Of course,” Kara says on a sigh. “And Rafe jumped all over her! I bet it’s not fun being Samantha right now. He really stood up for you in front of everyone.”
He did. Maybe I’m reading too much into that other comment, because he turned into my knight in shining armor when Mel and Samantha tried to embarrass and discredit me.
“So how did Mel know I was stripper
?” I watch Kara’s reaction. Her eyes widen for a second before narrowing.
“I don’t talk to her, and I would never share something like that!”
I believe her, and feel bad for even hinting at an accusation like that.
“I’m sorry,” I say quietly.
“Didn’t you say that Liam came to you about this show? If he was able to find you, he probably found out a lot about you too.”
“Yeah. That’s what I figure. But I wasn’t sure...” I decide not to bring up the fact that I snuck out to meet Rafe. I wait a minute and ask her, “Are you okay?”
And there it is, the elephant in the room... or on the beach, as it were.
“I’m okay. I had a feeling he was leaning toward you.”
Was he?
“I don’t know about that,” I say. She gives me a whatever look. I hope she’s right.
***
When we get back from our walk, one of the staff girls tells me Liam wants to see me. I grudgingly head to the studio, in the next building over. The receptionist is gone since it’s evening, so I head to his office and find it empty. My next stop is the viewing room. As I walk down the hallway, loud voices stop me. There’s an argument underway. Liam’s talking but as I sneak closer, I hear Rafe’s voice. He sounds pissed.
“Who fucking leaked it?”
“I don’t know, man! I don’t know.” Liam’s voice goes up an octave.
“You have to know, Liam.”
There’s a long pause and mumbling. Someone else is talking, then Rafe loses his shit at whoever it is. Liam joins in. It turns into a yelling match, and as it calms down, I gather that one of the staff told Mel.
“Mel kept bugging me for dirt on Lily!” the guy whines. It makes me feel a little better that Liam didn’t do this to me on purpose.
“Mel was behind this?” Rafe’s voice is hard.
So Mel went looking for something to hurt me with, the little bitch. Maybe Rafe will see her for what she is now. I strain to hear their words, hoping Rafe will stand up to them. I want to barge in and stand up for myself, but I also want to hear what he’ll say.
There’s more heated yelling. I tense up, but I can’t leave. I need to hear what happens.
“No one is airing that part,” Rafe says, cutting off several people.
“Who knows if they’ll air that clip?” Liam says. “It might get edited out.”
“It better get goddamn edited out! There’s no reason to air that, especially not when they have the show promo and Mariaso. I’ve got Mic on it. I’m not letting anyone use Lily’s past to increase their show ratings. You got that?”
“Uh... Yeah, sure, of course,” Liam says, but his tone doesn’t completely convince me.
There’s a small pause and I wonder if Rafe believes him. I hope Rafe is right, and this doesn’t make it on the air. I don’t want my personal business out there like that, no matter what people’s opinions are.
“Why would you air that here at the house?” Rafe is asking. “You knew what was on that tape and what it’d do. What’s the point in that, getting them madder at each other? Were you trying to stir shit up?”
“We need more conflict and drama,” Liam shoots back, unapologetic. “This is a fucking reality show! It’s about conflict. Both you and Lily signed up for it.”
He’s right. We did. And I realize with a sinking feeling that if Men’s Minutes doesn’t air that, this show probably will. They were taping us while we watched that video today.
“But it’s mostly been directed at Lily,” Rafe says, and I can tell his teeth are clenched.
“You knew the deal,” Liam says. “She’s your old flame. People will think she has an advantage and we have to throw that into question.” More voices join in, but I stop listening.
I knew going into this it might get ugly. It might get hard, and I might have to pay a price to win Rafe back. I was willing to do it. I still am.
“I don’t care!” Rafe stops all of them. “You didn’t dig up dirt on the other women.”
“You know we don’t care about Lily stripping,” someone says. There’s a round of insidious laughter that makes my skin crawl. “But we need to make this show a hit.”
“And we didn’t do that,” Mike adds. So he’s there too. “Samantha came up with that on her own.”
“Bullshit!” Rafe explodes. “If you didn’t do it, you let it happen. Now don’t let everyone gang up on her.”
I’m frozen in place, listening, when Rafe bursts from the room and almost runs into me.
“Fuck!” He steps back a half step and searches my face. “How long have you been there?”
“For most of it, I think.” It’s quiet inside the room, too, so they know I’m out here. I’m freaking out. What will happen now that my past is catching up with me? It could threaten everything I’m working toward. I feel sick suddenly, picturing people on campus seeing old pictures or something. But I don’t want to unload all of this on Rafe. Not now, and not here. “I can take care of myself, Rafe. You don’t have to worry so much.”
His face goes incredulous.
“What they did wasn’t right.” He takes me by the arm. “You don’t deserve this! Goddamn it!” He releases my arm and turns away, walking down the hall with his fingers laced together behind his head. I’ve seen him do that after running. He turns again and walks back to me. “I’ll fix this.”
I don’t know how he could.
“And I did have your back, Rafe,” I say, surprising myself. I knew his comment on the show bugged me, but I wasn’t expecting to blurt it out to him like that. He’s surprised too.
“What?” he asks. He doesn’t even know what I’m talking about.
“You said you need a woman who has your back...” I gesture with my hand, like the problem is right there in the air. I’m just embarrassed now. Understanding slowly dawns on his face.
“That wasn’t an underhanded jab at you.”
“It wasn’t? Because you felt like I abandoned you before.”
I hold his gaze, and suddenly he reaches behind my head to pull me in for a hard kiss. I’m too startled to react and he breaks it off just as quickly.
Did he do that to avoid answering? Or was that his answer?
My lips feel swollen, but he didn’t kiss me that long. It’s from wanting to kiss him more. He’s close enough that I could pull him in, but he looks edgy from emotion.
“I will fix this,” he says in a quiet, low voice, pointing his thumb over his shoulder, back toward the room. “I know you can take care of yourself, Lily. You’ve been doing that a long time. But I’m here now.”
What does that mean, he’s here now? What is he really saying? I’m searching his eyes when Liam calls me from inside the room. I sigh, frustrated. Rafe leans close again and kisses me softly and runs his knuckles down my cheek. Then he pulls his phone out and asks for my number.
“I want to check on you later,” he adds while typing it in. By then Liam steps outside of the door to hurry me up.
“Okay.” My voice sounds breathless, making Rafe stop and look at me again.
“Want me to wait?” he asks. I shake my head. He walks down the hallway and glances back at me before turning the corner. I’m starting to realize this bond is too strong to be broken by the last six years and what happened. I just hope we’re strong enough to be together now.
Chapter Six
Rafe
I leave the studio house and head around back to the beach side, where I watch the waves and clear my head. The sun has set and it’s starting to get dark. I head out on a run back to my place. I start out hard, pushing myself. Heat spreads through my legs as I warm up. It feels good to see what my body can do. No holding back. No worrying about injuries.
But it also gives me time to think. Why am I so protective of Lily? This is about something inside of me. I want to protect her. I want to stand by her side. I want her.
I can’t let that clip air on either show, so I need to talk to Mic abo
ut it as soon as I get a chance. There might be some kind of slander clause in my contract, or loophole, or some way for me to have a say in what airs. Mic’s a smart guy and he worked with my lawyers to close this deal.
I also wonder what will happen with school if they find out Lily was a stripper. Maybe nothing will happen, but it doesn’t matter. I won’t let that clip air. I told Lily I’d fix this and I plan to. It’s my fault she’s in this position. She came on this show and risked being exposed, risked everything, for me.
I reach my place and keep going at the same pace. I’m covering ground fast and it feels great. I need to clear my head and think about what’s coming up for the show. They want me to spend a day with each of the remaining women. Fuck. I just want some time to talk things out with Lily.
I turn around and run back to my place before it’s completely dark. I get home and shower, then text Lily.
I want to see you soon. Not the middle of the night.
We need to get some sleep for one thing, but I need to see her soon. If I have to spend a few days away from her, I need to talk to her first. While I’m waiting, I get on the phone with Mic and tell him about the shit fest that blew up on me.
“Wow, that’s shitty all right,” he says. “I’ll look into it. I’m not saying I can do anything, but I’ll see.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. Liam and his lawyers are sharks at this kind of thing, but you’re resourceful.”
He gives a dry laugh before asking, “So you and this Lily girl...? You gonna fill me in?”
“Mic, you know the story.”
“I know the past. I’m asking about the present and future.”
“Shit, it’s complicated. How do I just forget the past, as much as I want to?” I ask him.
“You don’t. But why does that past have to ruin now? You forgave her, right? You must have if you’re trying to stick up for her now.”
I don’t answer.