by Lisa Jordan
She scraped her thumb across his five-o’clock shadow. “Nick, I don’t think—”
“Then don’t.” Nick placed his finger to her lips. “Stop thinking and just be in the moment. I want to kiss you.”
She swallowed, drowning in his melted-chocolate eyes. “I, uh, don’t think that’s such a great idea.”
“There you go thinking again.” He stroked her cheekbones.
She reached for one of the chenille throw pillows and clutched it to her chest.
Nick pried her arms off the pillow and tossed it over his shoulder where it thunked against the wall. Her eyes darted, searching for something else to hold. Something to put some distance between them. She started to stand.
Nick grabbed her hand and gently pulled her back to the couch. “Josie.”
The way he whispered her name caressed her soul. She closed her eyes and breathed in the faint scent of leather and soap tangled in the knitted fibers of his light blue V-neck sweater.
His hands moved along the curves of her neck. She stifled a shiver. Her stomach fluttered. He lowered his head, his lips caressing hers with the barest of touches. Holding her breath, she hesitated for half a second. Her lips parted as he kissed her again and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. This time, there was no uncertainty. She slid her arms around his neck, sinking into his gentle embrace.
Nick pulled away. She pressed a hand against his chest. His heart raced beneath her palm.
She stole a glance at his face. The tenderness in his eyes awoke a feeling of longing for what could be. If she let it.
This wasn’t like the tentative kisses he used to give her in high school. This kiss came from a man who knew what he wanted and made no apologies. But he still had the potential to break her heart.
Josie tried to move away, but Nick anchored an arm around her shoulder. “Don’t run.”
“I wasn’t.”
“Tell me what you’re thinking.” The huskiness in his voice sounded like silk over velvet.
How could she tell him she wanted to spend the rest of her life wrapped in his arms? How could she tell him being close to him made her wish she could turn back time for a do-over? How could she tell him loving him made her heart ache so badly she wanted to curl up in a ball until the feeling went away?
She couldn’t. She couldn’t tell him any of those things because he’d do what he just accused her of doing—running.
She pulled her gaze away and reached for her now-cold cup of tea. She needed something to hold on to so he wouldn’t see the way her hands trembled. “We, uh, probably shouldn’t have done that.”
He leaned back against the couch, one arm still wrapped around her shoulders. “Seemed like a good idea to me.”
“It just makes things more complicated.” She shifted away from his arm. She couldn’t think when his fingers moved over her skin.
Nick glanced at her, but she couldn’t hold his gaze. He blew out a long breath and shifted until both feet hit the floor. He rested his elbows on his knees. “How do you figure?”
“Nick, I have a lot on my plate right now. When you’re around, I tend to forget about everything else.”
He grinned and waggled his eyebrows. “Oh, really?”
Good grief.
She set her mug on the coffee table and stood. “I can’t afford to forget about everything else. I have a daughter who needs me, a business to run. I need to stay focused.”
“What about me, Josie?” Nick slowly moved to his feet and faced her. He placed his hands on her shoulders. “I get complicated. But I need you, too.”
She gripped his forearms. “For how long? Until someone with fewer problems comes along?”
A muscle jumped as he clenched his teeth together. He stared at her. “Are you serious? You really think you’re just a diversion?” He took her hand and placed it against his chest. “Josie, there is no one better. You…you fill this huge space that’s been vacant in me for so long. You and Hannah—you two complete me.”
She wanted to believe him. Really, she did.
*
Nick stared at the split-level ranch with its gray siding, blue shutters and white trim owned by his soon-to-be
father-in-law. Or so he hoped.
Nothing to be afraid of. Except the latter. The core of his anxiety.
But he had promised Josie he wasn’t going anywhere. What better way to prove he was in it for the long haul than to propose? She’d say yes and then he’d have the family he craved.
Before he asked Josie, he needed to settle things with her father. Call him old-fashioned, but before he proposed, he needed Mr. Peretti’s blessing.
If the man didn’t slam the door in his face first.
He straightened his collar, brushed invisible lint off his jacket and rang the doorbell.
When the door opened, Mr. Peretti’s frame filled the threshold. “Nick, come in.”
Nick held out his hand. “Thank you, sir. I appreciate you meeting with me.”
Mr. Peretti shook Nick’s hand. “You said it was important.” He stepped aside and let Nick pass.
Noticing Mr. Peretti’s sock-covered feet, Nick slipped off his loafers and toed them on the mat near the door. The house smelled like freshly baked cookies and lemon furniture polish.
“Have a seat in the living room.” Mr. Peretti nodded to the room to the left of the door. “Gracie made coffee and just pulled a fresh batch of cookies from the oven. I’ll be right back.”
Nick moved into the living room. White upholstered furniture outlined a large Oriental rug patterned in blues and greens covering the gleaming hardwood floor. Framed photos hung on light green walls. White curtains hung from the ceiling-to-floor windows, allowing natural light to warm the room. A brightly lit aquarium filled with colorful fish gurgled in the corner of the room near one of the windows.
He picked up a photo in a silver frame that showed Mr. Peretti in a dark suit standing next to Mrs. Peretti wearing a lace gown and holding a bouquet of flowers. Their wedding picture.
Mr. Peretti returned carrying a tray. He handed Nick a thick ceramic mug full of steaming coffee. Nick sipped it. Not bad. Nothing like Josie’s coffee, but drinkable.
Grabbing his own cup, Mr. Peretti sat and leaned back, resting his ankle on his knee. He gestured for Nick to sit. “So, what’s on your mind?”
The older man’s relaxed demeanor didn’t deceive Nick.
He set his cup on the floor, away from his feet so he wouldn’t knock it over. That would go far in making a good impression. “Sir, we didn’t meet during the best of circumstances. I’m sorry for that. I’ve missed out on so much of Hannah’s life. If I could turn back time… Well, anyway, regrets won’t get me anywhere.”
“The past is in the past.” Mr. Peretti reached for the plate of cookies and handed it to Nick. “Focus on the present and don’t make the same mistakes in the future.”
Nick took a cookie. Instead of eating it, he rotated it in his fingers. “I’m trying not to. I mean I don’t plan to.” Why did he have to babble like an idiot?
Setting the cookie on his knee, Nick tugged on his collar. He had been less nervous when he’d had to defend his doctoral thesis. Sweat trickled between his shoulder blades. “I’m still trying to wrap my head around the idea of fatherhood, but I couldn’t ask for a greater gift. Hannah’s amazing.”
“She’s a lot like her mother.”
“Yes, she is. The thought of going back to work and seeing her only a couple of times a week isn’t something I really want to think about.”
“So, what are you going to do?” Mr. Peretti took a sip of his coffee, his eyes not leaving Nick.
“Well, that depends on Josie.”
“In what way?”
“Before I answer that, sir, there are a few things you need to know about me. About my past.” Telling Josie about what had happened that night had been tough. But facing her father—man, he needed strength greater than his own to get through it. Nick exhaled
and shared the same sordid story with Josie’s father and prayed the man didn’t kick him to the curb.
“That’s everything.” Nick stopped talking and focused on the fish swimming in the aquarium. His gut churned. A mantel clock ticked in the quiet room.
“Son, you’ve had it rough. I’ll give you that. When I married Josie’s mother, she wasn’t a Christian. I was so in love with that girl and thought I could change her. I was wrong. Being married and having a family wasn’t a part of her life plan. She left us to go find herself. I don’t want Josie facing the same thing. So I have to ask—where does God play into your life?”
“I gave my life to God back in college. Since the accident, though, I doubt He wants much to do with me. I’m not going to be listed in the Christian Hall of Fame or anything.”
“Only One is good enough for that honor. Thanks to God’s grace, we can be used by Him for His purpose. Don’t let evil pollute your thinking—God still loves you, no matter what. Keep trusting in Him. A few minutes ago, I asked what you were going to do about Josie.”
Nick closed his eyes, scrubbed a hand over his face then faced Mr. Peretti. “Even though I haven’t been back in Josie’s life very long, I can’t imagine my life without her now. I love her, sir. And I’d like your permission to marry your daughter.”
Chapter Sixteen
Only a fool would let a man break her heart twice. And Josie Peretti was no fool, despite her recent heart revelation.
Watching Nick help Hannah untangle the kite string—the patient way his large fingers worked at the tiny knots—crumbled the last brick around her heart. Apparently he was successful because Hannah started clapping and jumping up and down, her hat flopping against her forehead. Nick picked her up with one arm and pulled her to his chest. Hannah wrapped her arms around his neck.
When Nick left, Josie’s heart wasn’t going to be the only one to break.
She had to protect her daughter. Isn’t that what good mothers did?
If only she could believe he was really in it for the long haul.
Josie stretched out, leaning back on her elbows. She drew in a deep breath, filling her lungs with the crisp April air soaked with the promise of spring. Fingers of sunshine caressed her face. In front of her, the lake lapped at the shoreline. The breeze rippled the surface of the bluish-gray water. In the budding branches above her, birds tweeted to their neighbors.
What a rare treasure today turned out to be. In more ways than just the weather.
She had finished the lunch rush—Thank You, God, for answered prayers about business picking up—when Nick and Hannah came into the shop, carrying a wicker picnic basket and a multicolored butterfly kite.
Hannah’s gentle pleading had Josie doing something she hadn’t done since she opened the shop—she played hooky. The joy on her daughter’s face shoved away any traces of guilt.
Josie dug through her tote bag for her digital camera. She set it to video, zoomed in on father and daughter and recorded their first attempt at getting the kite in the air.
Nick held on to the kite as he walked backward on the sand in bare feet and jeans rolled above his ankles. His untucked white button-down shirt billowed in the wind.
Josie shifted the camera to Hannah, who kept one hand pressed to the top of her floppy denim bucket hat and gripped the spool of kite string with the other. With the weather in the low 50s, Josie hoped her daughter was warm enough in her cropped denim jacket, teal T-shirt and white leggings. Her cheeks had a tinge of color.
Nick released the kite. It buoyed in the air and then hitched a ride on a wind current, gliding higher into the sky. Nick jogged across the sand and knelt behind Hannah, showing her how to let out just enough string to let the kite dance.
The butterfly with its purple, green and bright pink wings dipped and soared, its turquoise tails trailing behind.
Hannah giggled.
Josie zoomed in as Nick pressed a kiss on Hannah’s cheek. He looked over at Josie and waved at her to join them. Still filming, she walked slow and steady until she reached the lip where grass and sand met.
Nick strode over to her. “Why don’t you take a turn with her and I’ll man the camera?”
“Thanks.”
Josie hurried to Hannah and wrapped an arm around her daughter’s shoulders. “You doing okay, babe?”
“Yes, this is fun. Thanks for coming, Mom. Want a turn?”
“Sure.” Josie accepted the plastic reel, surprised by the pull of the kite still soaring above the trees. Hannah’s joy buoyed Josie’s heart as the two of them guided the kite higher. A few minutes later, she handed the reel back to Hannah. “Can you handle this on your own for a couple of minutes? I need to talk to Nick.”
“I’m not a baby.”
Josie dropped a kiss on her daughter’s forehead. “You’ll always be my baby. Shout if you need a hand.”
Josie returned to the blanket where Nick sat with his knees pulled up and elbows propped. The camera lay on the red plaid blanket. Josie sat next to him and scrubbed her feet in the cool grass to get rid of the sand before she pulled her socks back on.
Still focused on Hannah, Nick nudged her with his shoulder, causing her to topple sideways. “Remember the Ridgefield Kite Festivals?”
“They were a blast, especially when your dragon kite took off Mr. Malone’s toupee.”
“He was a good sport about it. After that, he left the tacky thing at home and proclaimed bald was beautiful.” He grinned, his eyes hidden behind his aviator sunglasses.
A pod of butterflies did their own soaring in the pit of her belly. She reached for her other sock just as Nick slid an arm around her and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. Her hands stilled. She stared at the white cotton in her hand. Two more inches and she could rest her head on his shoulder.
Was that what she wanted?
Oh, yes.
She turned to find Nick staring at her. This time, his sunglasses were off. She could see her reflection in his chocolate-brown eyes.
And she wanted him to kiss her in the worst way.
As if reading her mind, Nick slid his hand around the back of her head, twining his fingers in her short layers. His thumb brushed the sensitive area behind her ear. She shivered. His warm breath caressed her cheek as Nick lowered his head and claimed her lips as his own.
He smelled of fresh air, springtime promises and hope. The sensation of his lips over hers, the awareness of his closeness dogged her. Love didn’t stick around. She knew that. But if only she could convince her head and her heart to come to some sort of an agreement. Otherwise they’d have to go into mediation, and she didn’t even want to consider that outcome.
“Are you two going to get married?”
Nick and Josie jerked apart. Hannah stood in front of them, her twiglike arms crossed in front of her, one foot tapping like a disapproving parent. Except instead of a scowl, a grin creased her heart-shaped face.
Chuckling, Nick scrubbed a hand over his face, but not before Josie caught the red darkening his neck.
Nothing like a kid to put them on the spot.
Josie shoved her feet into her shoes and stood, brushing the seat of her pants. Over the top of Hannah’s head, she saw the kite lying on the beach. “What happened to the kite?”
“I got bored standing there by myself.”
“I’m sorry, babe.”
“So, did you and Dad have a lot to talk about?”
Josie felt heat climb her own neck. Instead of answering Hannah’s question, she asked, “Hungry? Ready for lunch?”
“Can I make a sand castle first?”
“As long as you promise to stay out of the water.”
“I promise.” Hannah grabbed her pink bucket and net bag full of sand toys. “Dad, wanna help me?”
“I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
“Okay.” Hannah returned to the sand and dumped out a shovel, bucket and plastic shapes.
Josie knelt on the blanket and opened the picnic basket.
The back of her neck prickled. Without looking over her shoulder, she knew Nick was watching her. Hopefully if she pretended like nothing happened, he’d forgot about their kiss and their daughter’s insane question.
Marriage. Right.
Like Nick would want to marry her.
But what if he did?
What would she say?
She gave her heart to him once, only to have it returned in pieces. Would he handle it with care this time?
“Josie.” Nick whispered her name as he touched her elbow.
Eyes fixed on the egg salad sandwiches and carrot sticks inside the basket, Josie sat back on her heels and wiped her hands on her jeans. “Nick.”
“Look at me.”
She did as instructed. The tenderness in his eyes and the slight upward tug of his lips nearly had her launching herself back in his arms.
“Hannah.” Josie gestured toward the sand. “She’s just…she doesn’t understand.”
Nick leaned back, stretching his long legs out in front of him. “Actually, I think she understands perfectly.” He shifted and reached for Josie’s hands.
She had no choice but to sit and face him. Otherwise, she’d be off balance and end up in his lap. Facing him was much safer.
“We can tiptoe around the elephant or we can deal with it.”
He was right, but she was a little afraid of Nick’s response.
“Josie, from the moment I met you back in high school, I knew you were something special. The girl I once knew has been replaced by a woman whose heart and generosity are larger than anything I’ve ever experienced. You’re a terrific mother who will do anything for her daughter, including letting a guy like me into your lives. These past weeks have shown me how important family really is. I want a real family, but I want it with you and Hannah. I can help you out with the shop and be there for Hannah.” Nick pulled a small black box from his front pocket, flipped it open and presented it to her. “Josephina Elenora Peretti, will you marry me?”
Afternoon sun reflected off the princess-cut solitaire flanked by two smaller diamonds on a platinum band and sent a prism of color across the ivory satin.