The Ghost of You

by Tori Fox

  “Ahh but you didn’t say no.”

  I crack my knuckles as I look around the bustling downtown streets, filled with drunks who are all hesitant about seeing their families for the holiday. “She isn’t going to go. And I am not asking her. Why did you even bring it up?”

  He burps before answering. “She seemed upset about her family when she left. Mumbling about a letter and a phone call.”

  “What do you mean? Is she with you?”

  I hear him mumble to someone before he answers. “She was. She left.”

  “Fuck.”

  “Do you know about it? The letter?” he asks as I hear someone yell something about shots in the background.

  “When did she leave?” I ask, changing the subject.

  “I don’t know man, like two minutes ago. She came by after work.”

  My immediate reaction is to protect her. “Did she get a cab?”

  “I’m not her keeper bro.”

  “Was she drunk?”

  “Yeah kinda.” I hear him yell back to the guys in the room after he answers me.

  I could punch him right now. “And you just let some drunk girl walk out into the streets of downtown alone at night.”

  “Yo bro, relax. It’s totally safe here. She’ll be fine.”

  I see red as I listen to Mason speak. I can tell he is drunk and probably high on something. “Just like Rosie was safe?” I know it’s a low blow, but he needs to hear it.

  “Dude that was a different situation.”

  “Where did she go, Mason?”

  “She went to get her car, I think.”

  Fuck. She better not get in it drunk. I switch on the lights to my cop car as I pull away from the curb. “You better be somewhat sober tomorrow for Thanksgiving.”

  I hang up before I let him answer.

  “Where we headed?” Niko asks me as I drive toward Jimmy’s.

  “My neighbor is probably making a bad decision.”

  “DUI?” he asks.

  “Yeah and I should stop her before it happens.”

  He looks over at me and smirks. “The hot neighbor?”

  Why does everyone know about Anna?

  “Uhh yeah, sure.”

  “You should give her my number.”

  I punch him in the arm as I pull on the street that Jimmy’s is on. “She’s a nice girl, Niko. She needs a nice guy.”

  “You saying I’m not nice?” he asks me with puppy dog eyes.

  I snort. “Nice. Okay, man.”

  I see Anna walking toward the small parking area in the alley next to Jimmy’s. I pull over and throw the car in park before jumping out.

  “Going somewhere?”

  She jumps. “What the fuck, Noah?”

  “Where you headed?”

  She looks around and I follow her eyes as I see Niko get out of the car and walk toward us.

  “Am I in trouble?”

  “Have you been drinking?”

  She digs her toe into the ground as she looks down. “I had a rough night, okay?”

  “You can’t drive if you’ve been drinking. I could arrest you.”

  She looks up at me, piercing me with her hazel eyes. “You would really do that?”

  Before I can answer Niko cuts in. “It’s his job, ma’am. And since I am also a witness, I would have to support his decision.”

  “Fuck me.” She fumbles in her bag and pulls out her phone. “I’ll call a cab.”

  I push her phone down. “I’ll drive you.”

  She looks at me, then Niko, then the cop car. “Umm, no, that’s okay.”

  “Come on, Mayberry. It’s your safest option.”

  Something softens in her eyes when I call her by her nickname I gave her the other night. “You don’t mind?”

  “Of course not.”

  “Can you bring me to my car tomorrow? I mean, if you aren’t busy.”

  “Of course.”

  She nods. “Okay.”

  Niko sticks his hand out. “I’m Niko, by the way. Lover boy’s, partner.”

  She shakes his hand. “Lover boy?”

  “Oh my bad. I thought you two were… you know.”

  Her cheeks go red. “Um no.”

  Niko is on my list now. He just had to say something. I should put in a request for a new partner.

  “Oh well, then I should give you my number. Show you what a real gentleman is like.”

  I roll my eyes. “She isn’t going to learn from you, asshat.”

  I put my hand on the small of her back as I direct her to the cop car. I open the back for her and by force of habit, place my hand over her head. “Sorry, I’m used to putting criminals in here.”

  “I’m pretty sure you’ve role-played with a few girlfriends,” Niko chimes in.

  Anna’s cheeks flame even darker as she slides in.

  “Don’t worry about him. He’s obnoxious. And on my shit list now.”

  “It’s fine,” she answers.

  Once we are all in the car, we pull away from the curb and in the direction of home. Niko blabbers on about some bullshit as I glance at Anna in the mirror. Mason was right, she looks upset.

  Ten minutes later when I pull into her driveway, she looks like she is on the verge of tears. She tries to open the door but the child locks evade her.

  I jump out of the car and open her door. “I’ll be out in a minute,” I tell Niko before shutting the door.

  “You okay?” I ask her again as she looks for her keys in her bag.

  She just nods her head. She looks flustered as she looks around in her bag, so I take it from her and find her keys immediately. I open her door and she brushes past me, but I follow her inside.

  “Thanks for the ride. I’m just going to go to sleep.”

  I grab her hand as she tries to leave. “Come on Mayberry, what’s wrong?”

  When she finally meets my eyes, hers look like a warzone. “Bad day.”

  “I’m almost done with my shift. I can clock out early.”

  She shakes her head. “I’m fine.”

  “I know you had a phone call that upset you.”

  Her sad eyes turn to anger. “Please don’t act like you can help.”

  “I can’t help when I don’t know the problem. Just thought you might need a friend.”

  She deflates at that. “Oh of course. Sorry I got defensive.”

  “Don’t apologize.”

  She takes a deep breath before giving me an explanation. “I just had a long day and everyone is talking about tomorrow and I just want it to be over.”

  I don’t know why I am about to ask this, but I do anyway. “Why don’t you come with me tomorrow to my family’s house?”

  She freezes.

  “Hey,” I say as I cup her cheek and force her to meet my eyes. “I know you don’t like the holidays and I know your family upsets you. Hell, I don’t even know if that’s the reason you are upset right now. But my family doesn’t know anything about you. They don’t know about your past. They wouldn’t mind if you tagged along. My mom would be happy to have another guest.”

  She closes her eyes and sighs before looking at me again. “That’s nice of you but I can’t.”

  “You are off tomorrow.”

  “I don’t want to be a burden.”

  “You won’t be. My mom always cooks enough for twice the number of people showing up.”

  She pulls away from me. “I shouldn’t.”

  “You should. I insist.”

  “Don’t you have to work?” she asks. I know she is looking for any excuse she can.

  “Nope. I was able to get the day off.”

  “How?”

  I contemplate telling her but choose not to. “Long story.”

  She bites her lip as she steps back a few more feet. “Can I let you know in the morning?”

  “Yeah. That’s fine.”

  She attempts a smile. “Okay. Thanks, Noah.”

  “Goodnight Mayberry.” I walk out the door.

  W
hat the hell?

  Did I really just invite her to my parents’ house? Isn’t that what Mason wanted?

  Shit, I need to call my mom in the morning.

  I feel like a zombie as I finish my third cup of coffee. I only got three hours of sleep. Despite the fact I knew I had to be up early to head to my parents’ house today, I still made sure I worked out and got some studying in.

  I pour two cups of coffee and carry them over to Anna’s house. I hope she is feeling okay. Hell, I hope she isn’t pissed at me for driving her home last night.

  But I also hope she is willing to go to my parents. From everything she has told me, I think she will find comfort there. A stepping-stone before she can reach out and see her own family.

  I knock on her door and can’t help but grin when she answers. She has on a pair of sweatpants that are too short, ending a few inches above her ankles. She is wearing a stained and torn University of Georgia t-shirt. Her hair is half piled on her head, half falling everywhere. She yawns as she answers, covering her mouth with her hands. I can make out the dusting of freckles across her nose. And her eyes are slightly crusted over from sleep.

  She is fucking adorable.

  “Hey, Noah.” Another yawn escapes her.

  “I brought you some coffee.”

  She looks at the cup then rips it out of my hand, downing half of the hot liquid like it’s her lifeline. “The gods do listen. Thank fuck.”

  She walks into her house and I follow, shutting the door behind me. She walks through her kitchen and into her sunroom, taking a seat on a giant beanbag. I take the one chair in her room and turn it around to sit on it backward, leaning my forearms on the back of the chair. I sip my coffee as I wait for her to speak.

  She rubs the sleep out of her eyes as she looks out the window. I’m not even sure she is going to say anything but after a few minutes, she finally does. “I used to love the holidays. All of them. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, Independence Day. Hell, I even loved Memorial Day. Being with family was my favorite thing. Now,” she sighs and looks down into her cup before she continues. “Now I don’t even know what to think. I used to see the beauty of family getting together, laughing over memories, making fun of each other, even fighting over stupid shit that’s forgotten within minutes. Now it seems like a joke. Why do people put each other through that? The fights, the memories… the pain.”

  I try to gather my words. Because all of this is hard for me too. Today is hard for our whole family. “I had a sister.”

  She looks up at me. “Had?”

  I nod. “I was ten years older than her. So, we weren’t close. I always found her annoying, to be honest. And I hate that I felt that way. Because when she died, I felt like it was my fault. Why did I always pick on her? Why didn’t I give her advice as she went through high school? Why didn’t I spend more time with her?”

  “When did she die?”

  “Six years ago. She would have been twenty-five this year.”

  I look at Anna and can tell she is hesitating about what she is trying to ask. “What happened?”

  “Drug overdose.” I keep it simple.

  “I’m sorry Noah.”

  “It was a long time ago. But it still hurts every now and then. Just like all grief. The memories of everyone we lose, fade in and out. Some days are harder than others. But those are the days we need those we love the most around. So we can find comfort in each other.”

  Tears sit in her eyes, but she blinks them away. “Did she umm... die in November?”

  I nod. “Yeah. Two days before Thanksgiving. We hadn’t heard from her but it was normal for her to disappear for a few days at a time. She started getting into trouble a lot after she graduated high school and started dating a loser she met at college.” I take a deep breath before I continue the story. “Everyone was at Mom and Dad’s house for Thanksgiving except Rosie. There was a knock on the door. And I know that knock. At the time I had been a cop for five years. I’ve had to give that news a handful of times. It’s never easy. But it’s never as hard as being on the receiving end. My mom lost it, she was broken, her only daughter was dead.

  “It took us all a while to recover. It was hard on all of us. But Mason and Everett took it the hardest.” I pause as I look back up to Anna. Sympathy is etched across her face but also understanding. “Mason had been partying with her two nights before. He let her run off with some guys. He was wasted and didn’t see the problem with a nineteen-year-old girl wandering the streets of downtown at two in the morning with strangers.” I force the anger out of my voice. I’ll always be angry with Mason for his stupid decisions but I can’t blame him for Rosie’s decisions. “Rosie was Everett’s twin. Everett started beating up Mason. He knew they were at a party that night. Everett was always the good kid though and he was always trying to get Rosie to make better decisions. Despite their differences, those two were closer than any of us, maybe it was the twin bond or just the fact that they always relied on each other. Anyway, I broke up the fight not without getting hit in the face a few times by both of them.”

  “The crooked nose?” she interrupts, gesturing toward my face.

  “Yeah, Everett got a hell of a hit on me as I was trying to break the two of them up. My dad was too busy consoling my mom to even know what the fight was about. To this day he doesn’t know Mason was with her that night. And we all pray to God he never finds out.”

  “I—ugh I don’t know what to say, Noah. It’s so terrible.”

  “It’s life though. We learned to live without Rosie. We all got through it for the most part. Yes, we all harbor a bit of anger about it but we can’t let it ruin our family. Please don’t think any less of Mason. He blames himself more so than anyone else.”

  She nods. “What about Everett? I don’t think I’ve met him.”

  I grab the back of my neck. “And you won’t. At least not today. He stayed here for almost two years after Rosie died but he couldn’t take the memory of her so he moved out west. I talk to him once a month but he hasn’t been back since. It pains my mom because she feels like she lost both her twins when Rosie died.”

  I realize after I say it that Everett’s story sounds a lot like Anna’s.

  “I definitely can’t come now, not after knowing that.”

  I look at her strangely. “Why? That has nothing to do with coming today. Thanksgiving has turned into exactly what it means. Being thankful for what we have, for the family we still have. Even Mason, the self-declared black sheep shows up.”

  She bites her bottom lip as she looks at me. “Yeah but Noah, I don’t know anyone.”

  “You know me and Mason.”

  “I can’t intrude on your family when this day brings so much pain.”

  I sigh. “That’s the thing Anna, we don’t let the pain affect us. We say a prayer for Rosie, we relive the good memories, and then we continue on with our lives. Not dwell on the past.” I pause and sip my lukewarm coffee. “It will be good for all of us. Including you. Besides, Carson is bringing his girlfriend. You won’t be the only one there that’s not a Taylor.”

  “Mason will probably think it’s weird,” she says as she plays with the hem on her t-shirt.

  “He’s the one that brought it up. Inviting you.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes.”

  She goes back to biting her lip. “I’m not sure.”

  “All you are going to do today is mope around,” I tease.

  “I don’t mope,” she defends herself quickly.

  I raise a brow. “Really?”

  “Yes. I have plenty to do. Clean and umm… clean. Maybe some yoga. Laundry.”

  “Just come with me. I promise it will be fine. Plus, it might even make you smile.”

  She rolls her eyes. “Why do you want me to go so bad?”

  I could tell her I think it will do her good to see a family that’s been broken and survived. But she will probably kick me out and tell me to fuck off and never talk to me again.
“If you go then I won’t be badgered so much by my brothers.”

  “So you are using me?”

  “Kind of.” I shrug.

  She squints her eyes and purses her lips. “Does this mean I get to cash in and have you return the favor at some point?”

  If it means I get to spend more time with her, then absolutely. “Whenever you wish.”

  “Okay fine.”

  “Really?” I honestly thought it would take a bit more coercion on my side.

  “Yes. Now get out of here so I can make something and get ready.”

  “You don’t need to bring anything.”

  She looks at me like I’ve grown horns. “Yes, I do. I wasn’t raised by wolves. When did you want to leave?”

  I smile at her as her free-spirited attitude comes out. “Noon?”

  “I can make that work.” She stands and I follow. “Now scoot so I can get ready.”

  15

  Anna

  I don’t know why I said I would do this. I mean, spending time with Noah is my number one reason. But as we get deeper into the mountains, my hands start sweating. I haven’t been around family during a holiday in seven years. It should be easier because it isn’t mine. But after hearing what the Taylors went through, I can’t help but see the similarities. Not to mention they have a son that ran just like I ran when Kyle died.

  I look over at Noah as he drives and see him flicking glances at me. Like he is worried I might change my mind and hitchhike back to Asheville. I know I will not find a taxi service out in these woods.

  I nearly jump when Noah reaches over the center console of his SUV and grabs my hand.

  “You don’t need to be nervous?”

  “I’m not nervous,” I squeak.

  “You sure about that?”

  I shift in my seat. “Will they think it’s weird you are bringing a friend?”

  “I told my mom you were coming. She was ecstatic. She loves company.”

  “Oh god, does she think we are dating?”

  He chuckles and I bask in the sound. I love when he lets down his guard a bit, acts more carefree. “No I made that clear. Said you were a friend of mine and Mase.”

  “Okay.” I take a deep breath. “Okay. That would have been awkward.”