by Lois Richer
“He let you?”
“I think he realized he had nothing to fear from me. Whenever I come to this area, I usually see him. I always leave something for him so now I guess he’s come to expect a treat.” He dug in his saddle bag and pulled out a plastic zipper bag. “This won’t take long.”
Jaclyn watched him remove a large steak. Kent laid it on a boulder, tucked the bag back into his pocket and got back on his horse.
“He’ll wait till we’re away from here then he’ll come over to check. Do you want to watch?”
“Yes.” Jaclyn followed Kent for a minute, then they dismounted and sat on the ground, holding the horses’ reins.
“I’ve come across lots of different injured animals since we moved here when I was a kid,” he told her, his voice low and even. “I try to help them if I can. Some of them remember.” His hand stilled hers as she reached to touch her hair. “Don’t make any sudden moves.”
“What kind of a wolf is it?” she breathed.
“Mexican wolf. Not too many of them left. Come on, fella. Come and taste your dinner.” Kent kept up a low monotone until the animal emerged from the woods and loped toward them. “Okay?” he asked.
“Stunned, but yes. I’m fine.” She tightened her grip on the reins as Tangay shifted. “It’s okay, girl. I think this is a friend.”
“It is,” Kent assured her. “He’ll inspect the area first. He doesn’t know your scent so he may be a bit shy. But the scent of that meat will bug him and eventually he’ll take it. Just don’t move.”
“Not going anywhere,” Jaclyn whispered and threaded her fingers through his without even thinking about it. When she realized what she’d done, she hesitated. But she could hardly jerk her hand away now. “Here he comes. How his coat shines.”
The wolf halted about fifty feet in front of them, lifted his head and sniffed the air.
“Talk calmly. Don’t raise your voice or you’ll frighten him. He’s not a people person.”
She leaned close to Kent’s ear and whispered, “I’m not sure I’m a wolf person, but I’ll try to behave properly.”
Kent’s eyes met hers in a connection that sent frissons of shock waves straight to her heart. He didn’t let go of her hand until Tangay’s whinny broke the spell that held them.
“Give me those.” He slid the reins from her nerveless fingers and with a whisper calmed the horse.
The wolf studied them from his safe vantage point. Kent studied him just as hard. Riveted by the expression on the vet’s handsome face, Jaclyn couldn’t look away. This was a Kent she’d never seen.
“Look, our boy is coming a little closer.” Kent’s lips grazed her ear. “Stay as still as you can.”
Breath suspended, Jaclyn watched the wolf pace off the area, constantly sniffing, occasionally lifting his head to check out some movement. Finally he stopped about twenty feet away from Kent’s left side.
“Hello, big fella. You’re looking good. You been riding herd on my cattle?” The wolf tossed his head. Kent grinned. “Well, thank you. I appreciate that. I left you a little snack. I know hunting’s not as good as it once was. A guy has to work hard to get a decent meal, doesn’t he?”
Jaclyn didn’t move, entranced by Kent. His entire demeanor altered as he interacted with the animal. The irritation that had permeated his behavior when he’d talked about the longhorns was completely gone. Now his voice was full of tenderness. Totally relaxed and in the moment with this magnificent wild animal, Kent’s face radiated bliss.
“You enjoy your dinner, fella. And take care of yourself. We’ll meet again.”
The wolf waited a moment, as if to signal his agreement then loped toward the steak. After several sniffs he grabbed the meat in his powerful jaws and raced across the valley, heading into the trees. He turned once to look back, as if to say thanks, then disappeared. When she could see him no more, Jaclyn finally let out her pent-up breath.
“That was amazing!”
“Yeah.” Kent grinned at her. “They’re incredible animals. Clever, resourceful and extremely intelligent.”
“He certainly responded to you. I’ve never seen anything like that before.” She looked at him carefully. “You should get to work on your animal shelter—you do still want to build a sanctuary, don’t you?”
“Yes.” He sat up. “I often get to treat injured wild animals but they usually end up going to a zoo or something. If there was an area where they could be free instead of confined to cages or stalls...” His voice drifted away.
“Forget those longhorns, Kent. Your calling lies elsewhere. I think your father, if he were here, would agree.”
“My father was all about ranching.” Ice cracked his voice.
“But—”
Kent cut her off. “We should head back before it gets dark.” He helped her rise and handed Tangay’s reins to her. “Ready?”
The vibrancy that had transformed his face and sparkled in his sapphire eyes dissipated. The impassioned wild-animal caregiver had changed into a cattleman doing his duty.
Oh, Kent.
But all Jaclyn said was, “Ready.” She mounted up.
He led her back on a different route, this time more open with sweeping vistas on all sides. The silence between them stretched until they arrived at the rear entrance to his ranch.
“You know, I understand why you came back to the ranch.” She felt oddly diminished and yet expanded by the beauty of his land. “I feel very close to God out here.”
“Do you?”
“It’s almost like I can reach out and touch Him.”
Kent didn’t respond.
As she followed him into the barn, she noticed blackened sticks poking from the earth. “How did the fire start?” she asked quietly.
“Lightning. It was a very dry year and everything went up like tinder.” His voice hardened, his words emerging short, clipped. Gone was the gentle whisper. Cold, hard anger burned in his eyes as he removed their saddles. “Once lit, the wildfire became massive.” His fingertips whitened as he gripped the curry brush and swept it down his horse’s sides.
She wanted him to talk about it, to let out the festering hurt. That’s what the counselor had told her parents when Jessica died, though they’d never done it, at least not in Jaclyn’s presence. Maybe that’s why they were so far apart now.
“And Lisa got caught in it.” Jaclyn began brushing Tangay.
“Not exactly caught.” He stopped brushing and inhaled. When he spoke again, his words emerged in tight, controlled snaps. “I lit a backfire to stop the wildfire. It was so dry. We didn’t have enough water. I was desperate. The barns, the sheds, maybe even the house were in its path.”
“So you had to cut off its fuel.” Jaclyn waited while he put the horses in the paddock to nibble on the fresh grass. “Do you have any iced tea? I’m terribly thirsty.” She didn’t want to leave him with the sad memory of Lisa’s death. He needed to talk; she needed to listen. Maybe that was the only way she could help him. “What I don’t understand is why Lisa would go out in it.”
“Nor do I.” He waited till she was seated at the kitchen table before sitting opposite her. Condensation ran down their glasses and puddled on the table. He studied the surface, avoiding Jaclyn’s eyes. “I doubt I ever will.”
“Maybe she didn’t understand what you were going to do?” Jaclyn suggested.
“She understood. I told her. And yet she walked right into it.” He sucked in a breath. “I’d already lit the fire when I saw her. I tried to reach her, but it caught fast and I couldn’t control it.” His gravelly voice became hoarse. “I couldn’t get to her. The flames were too much.”
“You saw her?” Horror shuddered through her at his nod. She could only imagine carrying that image around every day and the blame that would magnify over time. Jaclyn too
k his hand, cradling his icy fingers, speaking fast, urgently. “You listen to me. It was not your fault, Kent. Do you hear me? It was not your fault.”
“Whose then?” The bleakness in his voice matched the utter despair in his dark eyes. “God’s? Hers?” He gazed at their clasped fingers then slowly drew his hand away. “I made her stay here. Lisa never wanted to come back to the ranch. But after Mom and Dad died, I had to come here, to straighten things out and try to make a go of it. I owed them that.”
“You were their son, Kent. Of course you handled their estate.” His tortured voice touched the deepest part of Jaclyn’s heart. She’d suffered with Jessica’s death, but at least she’d never felt she caused it.
“I didn’t have to stay here.” His head lifted and he stared at her.
“What do you mean?” Jaclyn didn’t understand the blazing anger on his face.
“I could have sold everything and left. But I broke my promise to Lisa that we’d go back to Texas. I kept her in a place where she was desperately unhappy. And do you know why, Jaclyn?” Harsh laughter cracked the silence as he waited for her answer. “Of course you don’t. Nobody does.”
“Kent, this is upsetting you and I never meant to do that.” She wished she hadn’t pushed him to talk just to satisfy her need to know what happened.
“Can’t take the truth, huh?” His smile didn’t reach his eyes.
“I blamed myself for Jessica’s death wondering if I would have done this or that, if it would have made a difference. But it wouldn’t have—it couldn’t have. So you go on.”
“Is that what you’re doing?” Bitterness flashed in those vivid blue eyes. “Are you going on with your life, Jaclyn? Is joining every group you can the way you’re getting on with your life? Or are you postponing your life so you can make amends?”
She bit her lip at the accusation. “Stop it.”
After a moment, Kent touched her hand, his face ashen. “I’m really sorry. I’m lashing out at you and you don’t deserve it.” He shook his head. “Let’s just leave it alone, okay?”
“Okay.” For now, she thought. But sooner or later she’d discover why he felt duty bound to keep his father’s cattle, and why he’d stayed here when he could have left. This man was in deep pain and she ached to help him. If only she could figure out how. “So, the reason I came out tonight was to talk about the clinic. Is there anything I can do to help get it moving again?”
“No.” He sighed. “I was waiting on some material. I heard this afternoon that it’s in so I’ll be back there tomorrow.” His voice was devoid of all emotion.
“Thank you, Kent. I appreciate all you’ve done.” She rose. “I need to get home. I’ve got a meeting. Thanks for the ride.”
“Sure.” He walked her to her car, silent and darkly brooding.
“Call me if you need help. With anything.” He didn’t respond. All Jaclyn could do was drive away. She glanced and saw him standing there, alone.
Something’s wrong, God. It’s like he’s drowning. Please help him, she prayed as she drove down the hill and back into town. Please help me to help him. And most of all please help the clinic. I’ve got to get it running.
The prayer made her feel a bit selfish. How could she push her own agenda when Kent seemed so broken?
She recalled the touch of his hands on hers, the protective way he’d helped her on and off Tangay. Most of all she remembered the way he’d stood there, alone, watching her leave. She’d wanted to turn around, go back and assure him he wasn’t alone.
But she couldn’t. Jaclyn couldn’t afford to get sidetracked by Kent McCloy. Besides, she knew what happened to love. It died, just the way Brianna and Zac’s had, and the way her parents’ had, so that now it seemed as if they barely tolerated each other. Romantic love didn’t last and Jaclyn had no intention of going down that path. Still, her heart longed to find a way to help Kent.
Nothing wrong with that. As long as she didn’t let it become more than friendship.
Chapter Six
Kent drove through Hope the next morning with a sinking feeling in his stomach that had begun at 7:15 a.m. with Heddy’s phone call.
“Can you be at the library at ten-thirty, Kent? We need to talk.”
During his first months as mayor, he’d learned that ignoring Heddy’s demands was done at his own peril. So now, as he pulled into the library parking lot, he hoped she’d get it over with quickly, whatever it was. He had plans to spend some time on the clinic today. Jaclyn was right—he had been putting it off, mostly because finding the trades he needed seemed impossible. But he wasn’t giving up. Not yet.
Kent had barely crossed the threshold of the library when he spotted Jaclyn. He jerked to a halt at the sight of her sitting on the floor, surrounded by preschoolers, their faces rapt as they listened to her.
“Quite a sight, isn’t it?” Heddy directed him into a room where he could still see Jaclyn through the floor-to-ceiling windows. “She’s a natural storyteller.”
“Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?” Kent tried to keep his gaze from straying to the pretty blonde and her big, wide smile, but Jaclyn was a magnet that constantly drew his attention. She looked perfectly at home on the floor, as if she was having as much fun as the kids were.
“Certainly speaks to her character.”
“It does?” Kent blinked. Heddy was now the doctor’s champion? His instincts went on alert. “Why?”
“Jaclyn heard our story-time team couldn’t show and volunteered to help.” Heddy’s face glowed as he hadn’t seen it in ages. “She’s an amazing woman.”
“Also a very good doctor. So why don’t you use her services, or tell your daughter to?” he challenged.
“I intend to do both.” Heddy smiled at his surprise. “Why not? My grandchildren need a good physician nearby.”
Kent was dumbfounded.
“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” Heddy scolded. “Aren’t you the one who’s been telling everyone in this town to look at things in a new way?”
“I have.” He never imagined Heddy had taken his comments seriously.
“Well, I have examined my attitude and decided to change it.” She sighed. “I admit it’s taken me a long time to get past what happened all those years ago. You have to understand, Jaclyn wrecked the doors which my grandfather donated to the church.” Heddy’s face lost some of its glow. “Those doors commemorated the death of his wife—my grandmother—and I loved her dearly.”
“You don’t have to explain to me, Heddy.” Kent was surprised by a rush of compassion for the woman who had so often made his life a misery.
“I do.” She dabbed her eyes and cleared her throat. “I watched my grandfather sacrifice to buy those doors—he endured hardship to commemorate his wife’s life. Every time I went into that church, I looked at those doors and relived so many happy memories of my grandmother.”
“I see.”
“Those doors cost a mint to refinish and even when they were done, they were never the same.” Heddy sniffed.
“I’m sorry, Heddy. And I know Jaclyn is.”
“Yes, she apologized to me back then but I never believed she was genuinely sorry. But after hearing Jaclyn talk about losing her sister—I could see how her hurt still hasn’t left her.” Heddy’s gaze pinned him. “Kent, she doesn’t want the clinic because she’s trying to make a name for herself. She’s trying to make amends for living.”
He frowned, hoping Heddy wouldn’t spread that insight around town.
“When she talked about the bond she had with her twin, it made me realize I’d never accepted that she was mourning way back then.” Heddy shrugged. “So when Jaclyn called yesterday to offer to have the doors refinished, I refused.”
Pride surged up in Kent that Jaclyn had reached out to Heddy. He turned to look at J
aclyn.
“Are you listening?” Heddy demanded when Kent didn’t respond right away.
“Why did you refuse?” he asked patiently.
“Doors are just things and Grandfather never put things above people.” Heddy beamed. “I’ve forgiven Jaclyn.”
“That’s very generous of you.” Kent could hardly contain his amazement. In the years since he’d been in Hope he’d never known Heddy to openly forgive anyone until she’d exacted whatever retribution she felt entitled to. Yet Jaclyn had softened her heart in a matter of a few weeks.
“It’s very generous of Jaclyn to give us this clinic,” Heddy said.
Laughter penetrated the glass windows. When Kent looked, he saw the kids doubled over with the giggles. Jaclyn was making faces.
“Whatever she’s reading them seems to be a hit,” he said.
“Oh, she’s not reading anything.” Heddy’s pale eyes danced with excitement. “Not yet. She’s giving them a talk about health.”
“Health?”
“Yes. She has this fuzzy worm, Ernesto. And she’s been using him—well, just look. You can see for yourself.” Heddy tilted her head sideways, indicating the circle of children now avidly involved in what was happening.
Kent looked at the doctor clad in her white coat, a green wiggling puppet covering one hand. Just then Jaclyn glanced up, saw him and winked. Every single mom nearby turned to look at him. Even Heddy grinned.
Kent’s face burned.
“She has an amazing knack with kids.” Heddy chuckled when one little boy cuddled onto Jaclyn’s lap. She wrapped her free arm around the child and continued speaking, unfazed. “I never imagined she’d know how to reach them,” Heddy said. “To look at her, you’d think she was all about fashion.”
Another snap judgment, just like his. Kent winced. It wasn’t just Heddy who’d been unfair. But as he stood watching her, he wondered if Jaclyn had agreed to fill in this morning in a deliberate attempt to win over moms and kids for her clinic.