by Ann Cristy
As soon as she was at her desk, Max called and asked her to come to his conference room right away. As she replaced the receiver, the phone rang again. "Cle Orwell speaking."
"It's Dev." His voice had a detached sound as though he was facing away from the phone. "Some friends have arranged for us to attend the opera this evening. I told them that I would have to check with you. Are you busy this evening?" His voice was flat.
"Ah.. .1..." Cle wanted to give him a haughty no but the words wouldn't come. "What is the work?"
"Madame Butterfly. I know you like Puccini."
"Yes. Yes I do...ah...I have a conference right away." She fumbled.
"All right. I'll let you go and assume you want to come. Get home early. We are invited for cocktails first. We'll have supper after the opera." Dev's voice was abrupt, then there was a buzzing in Cle's ear. The connection was broken.
If she had had time to dwell on their conversation at all, she would probably have rung him back and canceled. The first moment she had to go over it in her mind was the end of the day after Max had dropped her in front of the apartment.
She found herself laying out a rose-pink shirtwaist in silk. The severity of the style was given drama by the color and the gold-studded buttons down the front. The full skirt just touched her knee, the inverted pleats flaring whenever she moved. She was putting in antique drop-style earrings when Dev knocked at her door and opened it. She stared at him in the mirror, not moving or speaking.
"You look lovely. Are you ready?" His eyes roved over her from the hot pink peau de soie slings with the medium heel to her hair which she had coiled at her neck, a pink bone spike shoved through the chignon.
"Yes." She joined him then and they left the apartment.
"You look like Madame Butterfly with your hair in that style and with the pink needle through it."
"I have no intention of committing hara-kiri," Cle murmured as they descended in the elevator.
"I wouldn't let you." His voice held the same coolness as hers.
As he handed her into the car she couldn't stop the shiver that ran through her. If it took a thousand years, she would free herself from his hold, that emotional, spiritual upheaval she felt whenever she was near him, whenever he spoke to her.
The Porsche purred through the traffic and Cle envied how easily Dev handled the press of cars.
She cleared her throat. "Do I know the people who are attending the opera with us?"
"No, but I think you've heard me speak of Cubby Willson. He and I have been friends since Harrow."
She turned to look at him. "Oh, these aren't lawyers from a—"
"No." Dev interrupted her. "No lawyers this evening. There will be eight of us. Cubby and Lucille I know, of course. I've been in touch with them since I landed in Australia. I think Harry Blake will be here as well. Harry and I go way back. I, know his wife slightly. The other couple are Australian friends of Cubby and Lucille."
"Oh." Cle felt flustered. She had armed herself against lawyers. She would have to rearm against these people. It would be harder. They all knew Dev, knew his background.
"Now don't start making a big thing out of this." His hand moved and rested on her knee. In the old days they had often driven this way. He had never seemed to be able to be with her without touching her. She knew he was only trying to comfort her but she felt tongue-tied because of the first bodily contact she had had with him in days and days.
The house was a stone building, squarish and solid. Before Cle could properly study the profusion of flowers and climbing shrubs around it, the door was open and a barrel-chested man, blond and balding, rushed through the door enveloping Dev in a bear hug.
"Finally, you old dog." The man pounded Dev on the back. "Good to see you." He stood back from a grinning Dev, still holding him by the shoulders. Dev was only slightly taller than the sandy browed giant with the pale brown eyes. "Where's your paunch, old man? Lord, will you look at mine? You would think I had the children, not Lucille."
"You look as good as when we played rugger together," Dev answered, his laugh wide, emphasizing the tiny dimples that were at each corner of his mouth. It was so long since she had seen them she felt mesmerized by them.
All at once she felt herself lifted past Dev, so that she was eye level with the chuckling Cubby. "I thought Englishmen were restrained," she gasped, laughing.
"Not Yorkshiremen," Cubby stated then gave her a big kiss full on the mouth. "So you are Cle, the beautiful Cle who has knocked Devon Carstairs out of his Italian moccasins. You are gorgeous. Come along. You have to meet Lucille who is eaten up with curiosity to see the woman who snagged Devon-the-Devil-with-Women." Cubby finally set her down after Dev untwined his friend from her. Still he managed to put one arm around her as he was leading her into the house. "That's what he was called at school," Cubby announced, smiling hugely when his friend told him to shut up.
She felt as though she was swept into the room on the heels of a hurricane as Cubby announced to everyone that Cle was here.
A tiny doll-like creature with carrot-red curls all over her head came up to Cle, arms outstretched. "I'm Lucille Willson and I'm married to that tropical storm." She turned- from Cle to embrace Dev.
It was the warm embrace good friends exchange. Still Cle cursed the hot poker pain that lanced her insides. She was not jealous, she was not! She bit her lips. She had almost always closed her mind to Dev with any other woman. She had shut away any thoughts of the women who had been in his life before he met her. With sudden insight she realized that she was every bit as jealous and possessive as Dev had ever been. Dev had just been more open about it.
The embarrassing thought so clouded her mind that she had to have Lucille repeat the Asner's names twice. Bill and Ella, Bill and Ella. Bill was a partner with Cubby in the construction firm he had started when he and Lucille had emigrated Down Under. Harry and Tina Blake seemed very friendly.
As Cle accepted a drink she heard a scuffling sound at the door. A sandy haired toddler somewhere in the range of two to three years scurried into the room, an indulgent Cubby making a grab for a glass as the child rocked against a table. Following him came an aproned nanny cradling a round-eyed curly-haired blond in pink Dr. Dentons, a thumb in her mouth as she stared at the people.
"This is the wild part of the evening, Cle, when you meet the progeny." Cubby chuckled and opened his arms to the pink doll in the arms of the nanny. The thumb came out of the mouth and was replaced by a wide toothless grin, as she lifted two chubby arms to her father.
Cle felt a sting of tears as she watched the children. She had loosely planned not to have children, knowing that the only man whose children she would want would be Dev's, but now seeing the little boy walk toward her, his slightly bow-legged walk rocking him into furniture and people alike made her insides squeeze in yearning.
He walked right up to Cle and looked at her, head cocked to one side. "I'm Jamth."
"I'm Cle," she answered, putting out her hand and bending toward James.
"My mommy is going to have, 'nother baby. Nanny said 'Heaven help us, 'but I'm glad. I want a brother this time. Sarah's nice but she likes her teddy bear."
"I used to have a teddy bear," Cle said. She felt Dev at her side, watching her.
James nodded sagely. "Girls is funny that way." He smiled and looked around him when everyone laughed.-When he looked back, he smiled at Cle, then looked at Dev, his face solemn once more. "Are you her daddy? Mommy says you have to have a daddy to have a baby." He looked back at Cle unaware of a sputtering mother bearing down on him from behind. "Do you wanna baby?" His mother swept him high in the air but he still waited for Cle's answer.
All at once, Cle felt as if she wanted to cry. She could feel her body shake as she fought the feeling and smiled at the little boy.
Before she could answer, Dev had his arm around her. "Yes, we would like a boy just like you one day," he announced blandly, ignoring Cle's gasp of horror and her stiffened body.
>
Satisfied, James allowed himself to be carried from the room, announcing to his thumb sucking sister that that lady in the pretty dress was going to have a baby just like him.
Conversation immediately resumed and no one seemed to think anything of the child's words.. .but Cle. She felt coated with a stinging painful frost.
When Cubby came over laughing and apologetic about James she managed a smile and an offhand remark. Dev glossed over it by a laughing phrase, but Cle didn't really hear it. She was too busy trying to keep the torn up pieces of her insides from falling out her mouth. Dev's arm stayed tight around her for the short time they had before they all went to their cars for the drive to the opera house. Dev waved aside Cubby's invitation to ride with them, saying it would be easier if they drove themselves since their apartment was closer to the Opera House.
The drive wasn't a long one but Cle was glad that they were alone so that she had time to pull herself together.
"Cle, I could see you were shaken by James's question." Dev's voice was very low.
"Don't be silly," Cle said huskily, trying to tip her compact at an angle to catch the light. She jumped when Dev pushed a switch to light the mirror around her sun visor. "He's just a little boy. They always say things like that. He's a very cute little boy and I like his parents very much.
"Cubby is a good friend, and he married one of the best women I know." Dev looked her way for a moment. "They like you, I could tell, even though we weren't there very long."
Traffic became thick the closer they came to the beautiful building that is the pride and joy of every Sydney resident—the Opera House. Cle craned her neck to look at the sweeping lines of the building, loving the fluid grace. The artist in her sighed at the symmetry and rhythm against the night sky.
As much as she liked Puccini, Cle couldn't concentrate on the ill-starred lovers for thinking of her reactions to the little boy's words. Even "Un Bel Die," the poignant aria of love, didn't penetrate her painful reflections. She couldn't blot out the picture that kept forming in her mind of a little boy who just happened to be a miniature of Dev. Alongside a miniature Dev skipped another dark-haired child, a girl, who just happened to have really blue eyes with navy irises. She couldn't really see the singers. She flinched, blinking her eyes rapidly to clear her thoughts, but nothing seemed to help. There was Dev on stage in a naval uniform. Oh, God. Cle closed her eyes, applauding because everyone else was doing so.
"What is it, darling? Aren't you well? Do you want me to take you straight home?" Dev leaned over her as she hunched in her seat, a crease between his arching black brows, the emerald eyes appearing to probe her mind.
"What?" She tried to straighten in her seat but Dev was too close. "Oh, no, we'll go out to supper. All the plans were made."
"We're not going anywhere if you don't feel well." Dev's face had a set look as he took her arm to follow the others toward the spacious lobby.
"I'm fine. Really, I am." Cle whispered, her face tense as she tried to convince Dev, but not let the others hear what she was saying. Feeling the way she did, anything was better than going back to the apartment and being alone with Dev. She needed time to recoup, time to pull herself together.
"Did you enjoy it, Cle?" Cubby was at their side, Lucille looking bright eyed.
"Butterfly is my favorite opera," Cle said. "And what could be better than to hear it here." She swept her arm encompassing the beautiful lobby.
Lucille and Cubby nodded, pleased with her response. Cubby looked around him at the mass of humanity exiting the building and pursed his lips. "We had better get to the cars. We don't have far to go but we don't want to get into a traffic tangle either." He looked back at Cle. "I hope you like to dance, Cle. We have a place here that plays great disco and the big band sound from the States as well. And the food... ummmmm."
Cle laughed. In her peripheral vision she saw Dev make a move. "I love to dance. Just lead the way. I'm starving for food and eager to dance," she said, watching Dev pause at her side and stare down at her. She swiveled her head to look straight at Lucille and Cubby.
Cubby laughed and gestured to the others.
Dev was quiet even when they were in the car, adding to Cle's nervousness.
"What's Cubby's real name?" She tried to clear the sudden huskiness of her throat.
"Cuthbert."
Cle saw Dev's reluctant smile and sighed in relief.
"Very few people have ever called him Cuthbert." Dev chuckled. "Cubby is a very good-natured fellow ... but not about his name. He was named for a very rich old uncle who obligingly left Cubby his money, but I don't think old Cub ever thought it was worth it." Dev threw a look her way. "Don't think this talk about Cubby will throw me off the track. When we get home I will press to know what's bothering you and what was bothering you while watching the opera." He parked the car after several long minutes of searching for a vacant spot. It seemed that the place that Cubby led them to was popular. "But to get back to Cubby." He said this as he helped her from the car and locked it. "His family was not poor but Cubby still made his own way. He's a very strong person."
Cle nodded. "And gentle and loving with Lucille and the children."
"Any man is gentle when he marries the love of his life. Didn't you know that, my sweet?" Dev held open the door and the blast of sound, mixing laughter and music, came at them like soft missiles. Cle was glad of the diversion so that she didn't have to respond to another one of Dev's ambiguous remarks.
The table assigned to them by the maitre d' was a long one. It would seat everyone but it would make conversation limited to left and right neighbor and perhaps the person across the way.
Even with the air conditioning, Cle could see beads of perspiration on the faces of many of the people.
Cubby and Lucille recommended the Fettuccine Alfredo and since Cle loved Italian food and north of Rome cooking in particular, she ordered it. Dev ordered Italian as well, but he ordered the scampi.
When all the orders were given, Dev rose to his feet taking her elbow. "We haven't danced in a long while and you did say you felt well. Didn't you?"
"Oh, yes." Cle felt her smile stretch her mouth. Yes, I love to dance with you, you Limey oaf, but you also know damn well what it does to me. Her smile touched the others and Cubby jumped to his feet, clutching Lucille. His forward motion carried the doll-like woman to the dance floor with her toes barely touching the floor. She shrugged at Cle, her eyes merry.
"Since I married Cub, my shoes don't wear out. Most of the time my feet are not on the ground."
Cle laughed. Then she looked up as she saw Dev watching her. "What's wrong?" She felt out of breath.
"It's been a long time since I've heard you laugh like that. I've missed it." He chuckled. "You're blushing, lady," he murmured as he swept her into his arms, the fast-paced disco music gripping them and sending their swaying bodies round the room. "God, it's been too long," Dev mumbled into her hair as he caught her twirling body close to him once more.
Cle forgot everything in the blood-sizzling joy of dancing with Dev. He made the world spin. He made the planets collide. The beat entered her brain and she felt as though she had become an extension of Dev. She looked into his face, knowing that his laughing excitement was echoed in her own face. She didn't lose a step, not a beat as his moves became more intricate. The song changed but not the beat and when others sat down, she and Dev continued.
All at once she almost faltered when she suddenly realized that people were watching them. Dev's hand squeezed her waist urging her on. She returned his smile and forgot the watchers, forgot the other people in the large room, forgot there was anyone on the earth but Dev.
With a crash of cymbals it was over and the applause rose as Dev pulled her close to his body, letting her hide her flushed face in his chest.
"You were wonderful, darling, an angel," he mumbled, smiling as he nodded and acknowledged the applause before leading her to the table.
The others at the table r
ose still clapping and Cle couldn't repress a beaming smile. She couldn't disguise the happiness running through her after dancing with the man she loved, the man she would always love, no matter where life took her from here.
They sat down and Dev handed her a tall, frosted glass with a mint leaf and a lime on the top. With an audible sigh of pleasure she sipped at the drink making the others laugh.
"Cle, you and Dev looked professional out there." Lucille looked admiring. "You must dance often with each other."
"We used to dance more than we have lately," Dev answered for her. "But it felt so good out there, I think we'll be doing it more often." He kissed Cle's forehead. "Don't you agree, love?" He looked at her, the glimmer deep in his eye making Cle feel as though her heart might spring from her chest.
She nodded. Of course I agree with you, damn you Dev Carstairs. I agree with anything you say. I'd hold the knife if you wanted to stab me, damn you. Cle sighed, deciding that she wasn't going to fight his magnetism tonight. Just for tonight, she would let herself sink into Dev Carstairs, let herself wallow in his strength. Just for tonight, she would let down her guard.
Supper came and Cle giggled when she attempted to let Dev have a sampling of her fettuccine and he insisted that she feed him. He had never been so carefree, so boyish, she thought as she aimed the macaroni, curled around her fork at Dev's open mouth. She had to get very close to him. He steadied her with one arm around her shoulder and one hand at her waist. When his mouth closed on her fork, he made a muted ahhhhhing sound and winked at her. Then he took the fork, put it back into the pasta and began feeding her. Dev wasn't as neat as she had been, Cle was sure as she weaved this way and that to make sure he didn't drip any of the white sauce down the front of her dress.
"Dev, old chum, I haven't seen you this relaxed since we put Snedley's pet snake in the headmaster's study."
Cle laughed, pointing to Dev, saying, "He didn't, he didn't." Dev's eyes glimmered with amusement as he nodded. She laughed as Cubby described the old gentleman's hasty retreat through the window and how it had taken days to coax the terrified snake out of the chimney. In the meantime the headmaster posted a reward for information on the culprit. No one came forward.