“That does it. You are going to have to move her to the back and move someone else from the secretary pool to the front.”
“She is going to be so upset.”
“Either that or you will lose business. You can’t have someone meeting your customers looking like that.”
“I know.” Dexter looked so concerned. He hated dealing with personnel issues that had more to deal with appearance than performance. He would do it, but it pained him. He cared a lot about others. Maybe what Travis said about that coat rack applied to me and Dexter. He didn’t worry that much about me. At least, he never said anything to make me think he did.
“Is dinner almost ready?” Li’l D was back in the kitchen, ready to eat. He had showered and changed out of his soccer uniform.
“Give me about ten more minutes. I’m almost done. Why don’t you sit down and do your spelling while I finish up.”
“Okay, Mom,” Li’l Dexter said as he walked to the living room to work on his spelling words.
While his dad sorted through the mail, it occurred to me that I was tingling between the legs. I was thinking about Travis again. This was going to have to stop because I couldn’t continue to desire this man the way that I was. So I shook him off the second time since I had been home and prepared the table for dinner.
We had a quiet dinner. Everyone seemed to enjoy what I had pulled together. Then Big Dexter decided we needed some jokes.
“That was some nasty food,” he said as he stood up to stretch and rub his stomach.
“Yeah! That’s why you ate it all up, every morsel.”
I knew he enjoyed my meals. Whenever he did, he would always say the food was nasty. That was his way and most of the time I would just laugh at him, because really, my man was really funny.
Finally, I cleaned the kitchen and then went upstairs, showered, and changed into something more comfortable. I was feeling more vibrant than ever before. Did young men make you feel so much life? I actually felt young and horny. I sat next to my husband and kissed him softly on the cheek. He didn’t say anything. He just sat there like a bump on a log. I would take care of him in bed. We watched television. Then around eight, I put Li’l D in the bed. After I read him a bedtime story, he was knocked out. As I closed the door, I smiled. Li’l D was down for the count.
In bed that night, I did all kinds of things to my hubby. I tried to turn his ass out. It was easy to do because my mind was being constantly bombarded with images of that fine-ass Travis. The more he smiled, the harder I rolled my hips. I could feel his hardness inside of my vaginal walls. He finally turned me over and pushed my legs together tightly as he entered my vagina from the backside. This was a great feeling. It was also one of my favorite positions, one that I had visualized Travis doing to me. As my mind quickly rambled, tingles shot through my body. Dexter was putting that thang on me. I lifted my body up about an inch off the bed. This made him slide deeper into me. As I gently rolled my hips, I whispered breathlessly, “I’m coming.”
Upon hearing me moan those words, Dexter’s body went into speed mode. He was rolling his hips, thrusting deeper into me. It was feeling so good. I finally scooted to another position almost on my knees. I was so weak. I was confused, too, because I couldn’t remember who I was having sex with. Was it Dexter or Travis? Why was he playing with my mind? I had to shift gears and think about something else, but just like a record player with a skipping needle on a scratched album, my mind was stuck. Suddenly, my body shook and Dexter let out a long groan. As he pumped faster and faster into me, both of us released ourselves into a feeling of passion and paradise. That was a first for me. Having two orgasms back to back was basically unheard of for me. Dexter fell on top of me and my body crashed gently into the bed. After kissing my forehead and neck, he rolled off me and cuddled my body up against his in a spoon-like fashion. While I lay there, he held me until I heard him snoring in my ear. Then I gently pushed him away from me.
As I lay in bed, waiting for sleep to come, I thought about how much I really loved my husband. Was it possible to be in love with two men? Nah! I didn’t think so, but why couldn’t I release Travis from my mind? Before I could get the answer I was seeking, I fell fast asleep. I was so spent sexually that I slept for more than five hours, which was a major feat for me.
Chapter 12
The Commitment is Sacred
Friday morning, I dropped Li’l Dexter off at his school. As I walked him into the building, Principal Morgan stopped to speak to me. “Your son is playing well on the soccer team. He is also performing well in all his classes. He is such a well-mannered young man.”
“Why thank you. Knowing that will start my day off great. I appreciate you telling me that. You know most of the time when administrators and teachers talk to a parent it is usually about something negative the child has done. I’m grateful to know you notice the good things our children do and you are so willing to let us parents know. By the way, I will be attending the PTA meeting on Monday.”
“I look forward to seeing you there.” Mr. Morgan shook my hand and then walked down the hall. I stood there smiling, looking around the building, which was so nice and clean. The students were rushing to class. While I was talking to the principal, Dexter had rushed to his classroom. Before leaving the building, I peeked into Dexter’s classroom; he was looking through his book.
I waved at his teacher and then left the building.
Once in the car, I heard my cell ringing and pulled it out from deep inside of my purse. I answered the phone with a smile, because my caller ID informed me it was Pamela. I hadn’t spoken to her in days. I wanted to share my feelings with her. I wanted her to understand how I was feeling. I needed my best friend to help me sort through this confusion and, mostly, I needed her to convince me not to kick Sarah’s narrow ass.
“What’s going on, girl?” Pamela always spoke with so much confidence.
“Hi, lady. I don’t want to fight with you. I need my friend to be here for me. I am so confused. Don’t abandon me, Pamela, because of what I am going through.”
“Malika, I am not abandoning you. You know I love you, but I really want you to think about how your actions might affect your family, your workers, and also, our relationship.”
“What do you mean our relationship? How can my fucking someone else affect us?”
“Think about it, girl. We are like family. Our husbands are friends too. It is not just about you. What about the rest of us? Have you once thought about that?”
“Hell no! I am thinking about my needs. Not yours, not Dexter’s, not anyone’s. What about me and how I am feeling?”
“Let’s talk about this over lunch. Would you meet me at the Salad Bowl at eleven-thirty? I have a meeting near Lindell around ten A.M. The meeting is scheduled to end before eleven. Isn’t that close to your office, too?”
“Yes, I can meet you there. Don’t come talking no shit, okay? I just want you to listen to me.”
Pamela asked, “Malika, don’t I always listen to you? Even when I don’t like what you are saying, I’m still listening.”
“I guess you are right. Well, I’ll see you at eleven-thirty. Have a great morning.”
“You do the same, girly.”
“See you later.”
“Later, Malika.”
As I walked into the office, I felt a sense of doom. It seemed that ever since I found out Sarah had feelings for Travis and hated me the office had that dry, stale feeling. It was as if the air had this maddening, confusing state. Like any minute, something negative was going to happen. I just didn’t have the energy. I was exhausted. I wasn’t sleeping well at night because Travis was sexing me to death in my dreams. It was as if I could feel every touch. Sometimes, I found myself waiting for him to appear.
Was I falling so hard that I was losing my mind? Was this why Zandra and Pamela were fighting to stop me from doing something so stupid? I felt sorry that they couldn’t save me, but I couldn’t help myself. I had to live f
or me and find my own happiness. I decided I was going to ask Dexter to go to counseling with me. Without help I wasn’t about to let my girls stop me from experiencing something I felt would be absolutely passionate for me. Plus, I knew those heifers had strayed. Hell, all the signs were there. Like the time Pamela’s daughter called and asked me if her mom was still at the house with me, and I hadn’t even seen her. I had to call her butt and tell her to call home. Was she being scandalous that day too? She wouldn’t tell me a thing about her whereabouts. I knew she was up to something.
Zandra knew she needed to quit. I almost caught her coming out of a hotel room on Lindbergh Boulevard, where I was attending a seminar. I left the meeting room to go to the restroom and spotted her coming off the elevator. When I called her name, she practically ran out of the building. She was coming down the elevator from the rooms located on the upper floors. The hotel conference areas were only on the bottom floor. So she was definitely doing something. When I confronted her later, she acted as if she did not know what the hell I was talking about. So I knew what that trick was up to. So why in the hell were they out here getting dick, but didn’t want me to?
After speaking to my staff and briefing them on activities we had planned for the day, I opened my office door, turned the light on, and opened my briefcase to pull out my agenda. Turning quickly toward the left, I hit the button on my computer to turn it on. I was going to read my e-mail first, something I did most days before returning calls. E-mails for me were the way I communicated with mostly everyone—business associates, family, politicians, and even staff. I preferred e-mails because I could easily save files without having to use so much ink printing, then taxing my secretary to file, organize, and label everything. Yes, e-mails were certainly a great documentation tool for me. I also backed up my computer and saved the files to my data disk. No information could escape me. The staff knew I was a stickler for organization and I kept everything in order. So I knew they too were careful about what they sent me.
My first e-mail of the day was from Samantha. She wanted to know if we could meet for lunch later that week. I e-mailed her a list of my available days and times. As I scrolled down I read other messages, deleting some that slipped through our firewall, like “grow a larger penis in five days” or “I give the best oral sex.”
I stopped at an e-mail from Travis. It read:
Good morning, Malika!
I was wondering if you want to go to lunch today. Wanted to discuss with you some server problems you are having. Let me know. I will check my e-mails again by 11:00 or just call me on my cell.
Travis
I could not stop that smile from stretching across my face. I could feel it. It suddenly felt as if I was liberated. I didn’t know. I could only explain it like this: My day was sorta gloomy, like a black-and-white movie. When I read his e-mail, I suddenly felt gleeful and cheerful, which made me feel like I was in living colors. I could feel myself becoming more vibrant and happy, even though I wasn’t sad. This man brought stuff out of me. Not only did I see it and feel it, so did some of my staff.
As I looked up, Felicia walked in. “Malika, you must have heard from Mr. Travis,” she said with a huge smile on her face. I simply laughed. She knew me better than I thought. But I couldn’t let on.
“What can I do for you today?”
“I was wondering if you wanted me to go shopping at the dollar store to find some decent gifts like lotions, books, and things for the kitchen that our parents could use. We are having that activity next week with the parents and we need door prizes.”
“That’s fine. Take the corporate American Express and spend about three hundred dollars. You can also go to one of the other stores like Kmart, Walmart, or Target and purchase some nice gifts like pots and pans, telephones, lotion and cologne gift sets, bedding for the babies, and other baby gifts.”
“That sounds like a winner. Do you want Bridgett to go with me?”
“You will have to ask her. She may have a scheduled health workshop in the community.”
“Okay, I will check with her. Thanks, Malika.”
“Oh, here is the card. Make sure you take your staff ID and driver’s license.”
“I’m covered. I got this. You know me.”
Smiling, I laughed. “You are right. I do know you.” Felicia walked out of the office. Then I returned to my e-mail. I already had a lunch date. I wanted to cancel it badly to be with Travis, but I couldn’t. Pamela was going to be sitting at the Salad Bowl at 11:30 A.M. and I could not disappoint her. So I e-mailed Travis back.
Hi, Travis,
I can’t make it today. I already have a lunch appointment. Maybe you can stop by later.
I hit the send button. Within five minutes, the phone at my extension rang. It was him. He simply said, “I will be there around four o’clock today.”
“Okay, I’ll see you then. Have a great day,” I said.
Smiling to myself, I wondered if he could feel how happy he made me. As a matter of fact, I was glowing and I felt it. You know how old folks say they can tell you are pregnant because your eyes are glowing? Well, if anyone saw me now, they would be dead wrong about me being pregnant, unless I could get pregnant having hot passionate sex in my dreams. In that case, I would be nine months pregnant by now—ready to deliver.
Chapter 13
Two Friends, Two Views
I rushed out of the office, trying to get to the Salad Bowl by 11:30 A.M. If I got there late, Pamela would have a fit. She was always prompt. I was too, most of the time. But I had an unexpected encounter with silly-ass Sarah.
Sarah saw me leaving and she decided she needed help with a client.
“Malika, I need to discuss a case with you. Do you have time or do you want me to wait until you come back? You seem so excited, like you are about to meet Travis.”
“What do you need?”
“Are you meeting Travis? Because if you are, like I said, I will wait until you return.”
“What part of this do you not understand, Sarah? I asked you politely to stay out of my business.” Looking around to make sure that no witnesses were present, I turned back to Sarah and hissed, “Do your job or you are history!”
“All I did was ask you a question. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get into your business. Plus, I thought Travis was a contractor and not someone you personally dated.”
I didn’t respond to her statement. “Upon my return, Sarah, I will be auditing your record files.” I walked quickly but calmly to my secretary. “Please pull Sarah’s files and lock them in my office, right now.”
“Right away, Malika.” Ingrid got up and strutted to the file cabinets and began removing Sarah’s file.
Turning swiftly to Sarah, I smiled. I saw her fear. She had played the wrong card with me at the wrong time and payback was going to be a motherfucker. I hummed my favorite song as I walked out the door. I could feel the hatred from her hitting me in the back like darts on a dartboard. But I felt nothing but happiness, because I knew that the ball was back in my court.
As I drove to the Salad Bowl, I thought hard about my life and how I got into my current situation. I was a Christian, though I knew sometimes I cussed too much. But believe me I was pushed to say things I normally wouldn’t say. Plus, when I became overly stressed, I might have said anything. But I prayed often to God to clean my filthy mouth and to help me to control my anger. There were many times when I felt people were trying to use me because of my position in management. Often, people who befriended me thought they knew me and they began to think that I was soft and they could do anything to me. Usually, they were fired because they overplayed their hand too soon. What these employees failed to understand was that there was always at least one person on the job who had my back. It never failed, because not everybody was out to malign, cause problems, or backstab. Most reasonable folks knew they needed a letter of reference to get another job and that they had to explain any gap in their employment history, so they tried to s
tay on my good side. I hated that Sarah and I were having problems, especially over a man who wasn’t ours.
Once I arrived at the Salad Bowl, I parked and walked into the restaurant where I sought out Pamela. I found her sitting at a table, looking out of the window, facing Lindell Boulevard. I walked over and she stood up and hugged me.
“You look so good, Malika. Are you losing weight?”
“It’s possible. I tend to lose weight when I am stressed out.”
“Well, you are simply going to have to let that stress go. It is much more harmful to hold on to that stuff.”
“That’s easier said than done. Let’s go through the line and select our food.”
As we walked toward the line, I stopped briefly to speak to two ladies I knew from the social service industry. We chatted briefly, and then I continued to the line and selected a raisin and carrot salad, a side vegetable salad, and some baked codfish. Returning to our seats, Pamela and I bowed our heads and prayed over our meals. Tasting the codfish, I informed Pamela that it was quite tasty while pushing it toward her to sample.
“Wow! That is very good. I should have selected that. Now back to you, my friend. What are we going to do with you and this man?”
“You know it is not that simple. After all, something like this doesn’t happen every day. How often does a married woman fall for another married man?”
“Well, who’s to say that you are in love and not just infatuated?”
“I know the difference between lust and love, and to be honest, I am in love with two men.”
“Malika, get over that man. If you start seeing him, your life will just get complicated. Are you willing to give up your marriage for this man? After all, what do you really know about this Travis?”
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