by Jake Mactire
“Well, if it’s not Maria, who’s the lucky girl?” I snickered and Mike turned all red.
“That’d be me.” He was bright red, but had a huge smile on his face. José, Maria, Sandy, and Josh all clapped and were clapping us on the arms and shoulders.
Renee looked at Mike and at me.
“You guys are really gay?”
“Renee, we’re not only gay, we’re downright jolly!” I couldn’t help myself with that.
She looked a bit unsure but smiled at us.
“If that doesn’t beat all. This isn’t a place I’d expect to find a gay couple.”
“Hell, Renee, we belong here. We both love this place. If you look around, you see the people at this table who are our best friends in the world. Believe it or not, we fit in here.”
Sandy had to jump in too. “My dad’s the sheriff here, and he was just tellin’ both Jeff and Mike to take care of each other and watch out for each other. We’d been bettin’ how long it would take them to shack up and then get together once they met.”
Mike started coughin’ on that one, and I managed to stutter out, “You bet on us?”
“Yeah, boss.” José’s smile was huge. “I won the pool on when you’d first shack up.”
“Hell, no wonder you was so happy.” I gave him a sour look. Sandy laughed.
“Yeah, but I won about the getting together. I thought that once you shacked up, Mike wouldn’t spend another night in the bunkhouse, and he hasn’t.” Mike was bright red. I must have been too.
“Well, folks, I’m really happy our personal lives can provide you so much entertainment.”
Everyone laughed including Carol, Pam, and Renee.
We sat and watched and listened to the other singers for a while. It was fun and some of the people, both tourists and locals, had good voices. Several young guys who had worked with the forest service sang “Tubthumping” by Chumbawamba and did a great job. Right after that, Mike and I got up and sang “Seven Bridges Road” with no accompaniment.
Mike and I sang to each other. Our voices seemed to complement one another. We got back to the table, and Pam smiled at us.
“Okay, watching you two together, I can see your heart is stolen, Jeff, and yours too, Mike. Did you guys meet here?”
“Yeah, we did. We just sorta fell together.”
“Although we do have the feelin’ that Jeffy’s dad mighta tried to fix us up.”
Mike had spoken the suspicion that both of us had. Sandy snorted.
“Jeff, Mike, he did hope the two of you would end up together. He told me you two are two sides of the same coin. If you didn’t end up together, you’d both be worse off for it.”
“Then why in the hell didn’t he tell me?”
“Keep your pants on for once, Jeff. I reckon he just never found the right time. And Mike did need some work.” Both Mike and I were speechless. A couple of tourists got up and sang “Bring it on Home” by Little Big Town. Renee, Carol, and Pam had been buying us more beer and whiskey, and we were both feeling a bit toasty.
“You all sounded great, and it was so much fun sitting with you and visiting. I’ve gotta say you have really made our evening. All of you are a very special group of young people.”
We all chorused, “Thanks.”
“Jeff, Mike, Sandy was telling us about how you guys are thinking of making part of the ranch a dude ranch.” Renee was talking now.
“We’re thinkin’ on it.”
“She also told us about what you did for that little boy and his parents and the other guy. Pam, Carol, and I are honored to make your acquaintance.”
“Hell, weren’t nothin’ special. We just wanted to make the folks happy.” I was about ten shades of red. I continued on, “I’ll tell you what, ladies. If you are up for it, when I do start takin’ dudes, you got a friend of the family discount. That sound okay to you?”
They all chorused yes, so we exchanged contact information. By this time, Mike and I were more than just a bit drunk. Josh wasn’t far behind us. Luckily, José was totally sober and so were Sandy and Maria. I had my hand over the back of Mike’s chair. His hand was on my knee. It was nothing overly demonstrative, even nothing two straight men wouldn’t do. I did want to touch him bad. I could see he felt the same about me. Everyone began urging us to sing one final song. Maria and I did “Whiskey Lullaby.” It was a sad song about people who loved each other dearly, but couldn’t get it together, so they drank themselves to death.
It served to quiet the rowdy bar down just a little. Sandy smiled at me.
“By the way, Jeff, Maria and I are comin’ out to the ranch tonight,” Sandy said.
“What?”
“Yeah, we thought we might get to see you and Mike eatin’ breakfast in just your long johns.” She laughed and looked at José and Josh, who had the good sense to look away. She then launched into an explanation for the ladies. That made me figure it was time to go. José and Josh agreed. We bid good night to Pam, Carol, and Renee. Sandy and Maria followed us out. It had been a fun evening. As we walked out to the trucks, I went over to Sandy and put my arm around her.
“I am really happy we still hang together, Sandy. I can’t really imagine life without you.”
“Well, we’ve been friends since the third grade, so I feel the same way.”
The girls got in Sandy’s truck, and the rest of us got in my truck. I was in no shape to drive, so was pretty glad that José had offered to be the designated driver. Mike and I poured ourselves into the back seat. He leaned against me, and I put my arm around his shoulders.
“You have fun tonight, buddy?”
“Hell yeah, Jeffy. You?”
“Most fun I’ve had in a while with my clothes on.” José and Josh snickered, and Mike snuggled into me. Life was good.
“José, Josh, you guys have fun too?”
“Yes, boss, it was very much fun.”
Josh added. “I had a great time, Jeff. Renee told me she thinks cowboys are hot. She gave me her cell phone number.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, I guess you and Mike here got her all primed, but neither of you is available. I’ll have to use you guys to help me pick up women.”
Mike chuckled, “It don’t say too much for your skills with ladies if you need a couple of gay guys to help you pick up women.”
“Mike, I am open minded. Whatever works, works. I ain’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth.” I had to laugh at this. The night was clear and cold. I was looking forward to gettin’ between the sheets with Mike and keeping each other warm. As José was getting closer to the turn off to the ranch, it looked like a motorcycle came from the road to the ranch. It was dark and over a distance, but the rider looked fat. He was long gone toward the mountains by the time we took the turnoff. I could see motorcycle tracks in the dirt of the road in the headlights.
As we got closer to the ranch house, I saw cattle in the yard and trotting back to the pastures behind the ranch house. The beeves in the holding pen were still there, but milling around nervously.
“Shit! That fat son of a bitch Porky knocked the fence to the holding pen where the heifers were down! How in the hell did that fat fuck find out where I live?”
Chapter Twelve
I SAT at my desk in the office, going over the paperwork and the checks we got from the beeves we sold. I had enough to meet the bills and pay the boys, and a bit more; it could have been a great deal worse though. We made a small profit despite the stock stolen by the rustlers. It struck me that I’d mentioned a while ago to Mike we needed to get supplies. I reckoned we could do that tomorrow. There was enough fresh meat in the freezer from two beeves I kept out, and quite a bit of pork I had gotten from the butcher in exchange for a beef.
It had been a busy week. I still had to laugh when I thought about that asshole Porky trying to cause problems with the cattle. He was so stupid though. He busted through the holding pen with the heifers, calves, and bull on the inside of the cattle guard. Which mea
nt the cattle would stay on my property, and all we had to do that evening was herd them toward the pastures. Every one of us, including Sandy and Maria, got saddled up and herded the cattle toward the pastures. We had planned on doing that after selling off the beeves, but it just got done early. We had the fence repaired the next day, so no lasting damage was done.
I still couldn’t figure out how Porky knew where I lived. It just didn’t make any sense. It gave me a cold feeling to think that maybe he’d followed me, but for the life of me I didn’t remember seeing him, and I would have heard the noise of his bike, wouldn’t I? It was like the rustlers killing Pedro and shooting at Mike and Wayne. It didn’t add up. I felt bad for Wayne when he did roll in Monday morning from wherever he spends the weekends. He felt real guilty he wasn’t here when Porky did his little attempt at vandalism. Not only did he feel guilty, he was pissed. I grew up with Wayne around, and I knew the signs. I reckoned Porky was in for it bad if he happened across Wayne. I decided it was time for more coffee. I grabbed my cup and walked out of the office and into the living room. Mike was lying on the couch, reading. It was one of those cold rainy fall days. We both had sweatpants on and T-shirts. Mike had a throw blanket across his legs and feet.
“Hey there, buddy. I’m gonna make some coffee, you up for a cup?”
“Yeah, that sounds real good now.”
“When I bring you the coffee, mind if I sit down with ya?”
“Only if you cuddle up with me.”
“You got a deal. We gotta keep each other warm.” I walked into the kitchen and put the water for the coffee on. I looked out the window. It was after the equinox, and the days were gettin’ noticeably shorter now. Because of the clouds and rain today, we had that murky kind of twilight that I associate with winter days here in the north. I continued staring out the window. Hunting season was starting in just a few days. Forecast had rain off and on for the next ten days, so I figured Mike and I would end up hunting in the rain. We’d originally planned to take horses into the back country of the national forest, but the more I thought about it the more I thought it was a good idea to bring the truck rather than the horses. First of all, the heater in the truck would make a world of difference if we had some problems. The truck was four-wheel-drive and built for off-road, and we could carry more gear to make camping in the rain more comfortable. The truck was also a lot harder to mistake for a deer than a horse. I poured the coffee and carried the cups into the living room.
“Move that sweet ass of yours over and let me sit down.” I set both cups of coffee on the coffee table.
“Thanks, Jeff.” Mike leaned against me and threw the little blanket over both our legs. He’d built a fire, so it was nice and comfy in the living room. I was looking out the window at the view of Lucky Jeff Bluff and the river on the other side. The visibility was low because of the rain, but there were misty clouds drifting at the side of the bluff amongst the pine trees.
“Ya know, buddy, a rainy day like this has a beauty all of its own.”
“Yeah, it sure does. I like the way the clouds hug the bluff sort of.”
“I’m gonna go to Wenatchee for supplies tomorrow. I wanna get stuff for a while, get the pantry filled, and then the only stuff we’ll need to go to the store for will be dairy and fresh veggies. You wanna go with me?”
“Sure.”
“We can get ammo for huntin’ and food for that too. I was thinkin’ on takin’ the truck rather than the horses on the huntin’ trip.”
“Yeah, the more I think on that the better idea the truck sounds.”
“So you still lookin’ forward to goin’ huntin’ even with the rain?”
“I am. It’ll be fun. Besides, we ain’t gonna let a little rain stop us are we, Jeffy?”
“Hell no, we’ll take rain gear and stuff. I don’t think we’ll have snow or anything like that though.”
“Did you hear from the sheriff about Porky?”
“He said Porky just seemed to disappear. Police in Newhalem and Rockport were lookin’ for him to come down off the pass on the west side, and he never showed or they missed him.”
“Well then, maybe he’s gone for good.”
“I sure as hell hope so. If he wasn’t so stupid, he coulda done a lot of damage.”
“Say, Jeff, did you hear the Flannigans got hit by rustlers again?”
“No, what happened?”
“I guess Sandy told Maria, who told José. Seems they are gonna do their roundup next week. They ain’t moved the beeves outta the land by the national forest. Looks like they’ve lost about ten head over the last few days.”
“Sheriff’s pretty pissed about lack of cooperation from the forest service on tryin’ to track any rustlers through the national forest, seems they are pretty short staffed.”
“He shoulda told the feds it was pot growers and meth labs rather than rustlers. They woulda been here thicker than fleas on an old hound dog.”
“I’ll have to suggest that to Sheriff Johnston, Mike.” We both laughed.
“How’s the sculptin’ comin’?”
“I got two new ones I’m workin’ on. Mary Grace wants to do the exhibition in November, December, and January. She said after that, I can keep a couple of pieces on display.”
“That’s great. I’m really kinda shocked your ex-boyfriend, Robert, sent you the sculptures you did there and your stuff.”
“People will surprise ya sometimes. What got to me was the apology letter sayin’ he had lots of time to think on the drive back to Seattle and then the plane to San Francisco. He reckons I was right about him tryin’ to change me. What he wanted was a fantasy, and when that fantasy became real, it really wasn’t what he wanted anyway.”
“I guess I’m gonna have to revise my opinion of him.”
“He did say he was sorry for comin’ on to you when I was drunk that night.”
“Really, what else did he say about me?”
“He told me that the way ‘that hot blond cowboy stares at you, you had better go for the gusto, Jeffrey. I feel that he is probably much better suited for you and you for him than you and I were’.” I imitated Robert’s voice when I relayed to Mike what he said. We both laughed.
“It turns out he was pretty smart. We do fit together pretty well.” Mike leaned closer into me and I put my arm over his shoulders. “Day after tomorrow is first of October. That’s when huntin’ season opens. So when do you wanna go and for how long?”
“What’s two days after tomorrow sound like to ya, Jeff? That will give us time to make sure everything is ready. We could go for five days to a week.”
“Sounds like a plan. Wanna go and check the huntin’ gear? It wouldn’t hurt to do that before goin’ to Wenatchee. That way if there is anythin’ else, we can get it there.” We headed off to look at the gear, already looking forward to being in the woods.
We pulled into the parking lot of the Wenatchee Costco. We’d made our shopping list, and checked it twice. We also needed to stop at a sporting goods store and get some ammo. We’d gone through the hunting gear and had pretty much all we needed. Mike had come up with the great idea of printing out the pages of the national forest maps we had put together for Sheriff Johnston with the locations of the stolen cattle marked. The pages would be the perfect way to decide just where we wanted to go hunting. So after getting supplies, we’d be pretty much set. We grabbed a cart and headed into Costco. I started laughing, and Mike gave me a quizzical look.
“I was just thinkin’ of an old episode of Designing Women on TV. Julia and Suzanne were in a grocery store and Suzanne was droolin’ over a coupla guys. Julia gave her a disgusted look and said, ‘Two handsome men, a single cart, and fresh pasta. You figure it out.’ It just made me think of the two of us with one cart.”
Laughing, Mike asked, “You want me to pick up some fresh pasta?”
“I think we can live without it, bud.”
We picked our way through the aisles buying fifty-pound sacks of flour and suga
r, spices, and other stuff that’d keep. We got other stuff like canned veggies, cornmeal, candles, soap, cleaning stuff, all the things that are cheaper to buy at Costco. We’d just go into Winslett for bread, milk, fresh veggies, and stuff like that. We ended up gettin’ two carts full of stuff. We went through checkout and had just got to the truck when we heard a voice.
“Jeff Connelly. So you’re back. I take it you’ll be going back to San Francisco soon.” It was said as a statement not a question. I looked up and saw reverend John Spencer, a real fire and brimstone preacher from over in Pateros.
“Reverend, I reckon you didn’t see all the supplies we’re loadin’ up. Don’t look like a man who’s leavin’ would buy this much does it?” Mike stiffened when I said reverend. The good reverend himself was staring at me with a distasteful scowl.
“You know, Connelly, we don’t need perverts like you around here. There is a special place in hell reserved for you. You’re turning Winslett into a den of iniquity.” I laughed loud and hard at that one.
“Well, Reverend.” I let the sarcasm just drip off my voice on the word reverend. “Winslett sure don’t look like no den of iniquity I ever visited. There’s no free condoms, closed circuit TVs with gay porn, and go-go boys on stage strippin’.”
Mike started laughing at that.
“Don’t let this spawn of Satan corrupt you, boy, or you’ll end up in hell right beside him!” The reverend spat out at Mike.
Mike continued laughing and finally said, “He’s already corrupted me, and it felt real good! Seriously now, it’s hypocrites like you that make me agnostic. You go on preachin’ about God’s love, but nothin’ but hate comes outta your mouth. If the choice is goin’ to heaven with you, or goin’ to hell with Jeff here, I’m with Jeff all the way.” Spencer turned so red he was purple with fury. He stepped forward. He was so angry, he was spitting when he was talking.
“I could have quite a few people picketing your ranch with posters round the clock.”
“Don’t make me no never mind. Property line goes all the way down the road. You can’t see or hear the road from the house. And I’d just love to defend my property if you trespassed.”