by Ashley Blake
“Yes, I know that Sophia is the mother of my son and she will always be around in some way, but that does not mean that she will affect my relationship with the woman I love. I love you Elena, and I don’t want you to think that life with me will be miserable because of her.”
“I don't think life with you would be miserable, I just think that it would be more complicated than it had to be because of her. Maybe I would think differently if you had told me about her and Jaden from the beginning but now, I’ll never know. I do love you Sebastian, I just think that with someone like her she would do everything in her power to make our lives complicated.”
I decided to tell him how I felt instead of holding back because my heart was winning over what my head was saying. I was in love with him and I was sad that things had turned out the way they did. I kept telling myself that it wasn’t selfish of me to wish that he didn’t have a three-year-old son but whenever I looked in the mirror and thought about it, I felt like a very selfish person. At 24 years old, I just wasn’t sure if I was ready for the responsibility of someone else’s child.
He looked at me. “You said you love me.”
"Yes, but that doesn't change the situation Sebastian. I don't mean to sound so selfish but it's a lot, you have a lot of stuff, and I wish that I had known everything from the beginning.”
"Would that have changed things for you? Do you think that you wouldn't have fallen in love with me if you knew from the beginning that I had a son?”
“I don’t know, but I feel like you intentionally kept that information from me.”
"Elena, I told you before that the only reason I didn't say something sooner is because I was trying to protect everyone involved. And to be honest, I was being a little bit selfish. I liked having time with just us and I wanted you to get to know me as a person and not me as a father. On some level maybe I was afraid that if you knew about Jaden right away you wouldn’t even give me the time of day, so I was hoping that if you got to know me first you would just fall in love with him when you got to know him.”
We sat there in silence for a couple of minutes and I was just getting ready to tell him that I needed more time when my phone rang.
“Hello?”
Bev sounded frantic. “Elena, tell Mr. Blu to call his mother immediately.”
I instantly felt terrified because I could tell that something was wrong. I looked at Sebastian and held the phone out to him. "You need to call your mother, there is some sort of emergency.”
He quickly grabbed the phone and dialed her number. He was silent as he listened to her and about 20 seconds into the call all of the blood drained from his face. I could feel the panic creep up on me as I watched his ashen face that was frozen in disbelief. When he hung up the phone he sat there quietly staring at the phone.
I was afraid to ask but I knew that I had to.
“What happened?”
My words must have jarred him out of his trance because he looked at me like he didn’t know that I was in the room. His eyes began to fill with tears and I felt sick to my stomach. Something was definitely wrong.
His voice was deadpan as he slowly told me the news. “There was a train derailment in Paris and all 164 passengers were killed.” His voice broke as he uttered the next words. “Sophia was on the train.”
My stomach dropped into my feet and I got up and rushed over to him and put my arms around him. “Oh Sebastian, I’m so sorry.” As soon as the words came out, Jaden popped into my head, and to say that I was terrified to ask about him was an understatement. “Please tell me Jaden wasn’t with her.”
The tears were flowing freely as his sad eyes held mine, and he let out a deep sigh. “No, he was at home with the nanny.”
Thank God.
I gave him a tissue and gently caressed his back as I stood next to him. “What can I do to help you?”
He sat there with his head in his hands and I felt so bad for him because I could see how badly he was hurting.
“I have to get to Paris, I have to figure out how to tell Jaden his mommy won’t be coming home.” He collapsed against me, his shoulders shaking as his body was racked with sobs.
I rubbed his back trying to comfort him, my mind racing trying to figure out how I could help him.
“I will be here if you need me for anything, Sebastian.”
He looked up at me with sad eyes as he stood up. “Thanks. I should probably go make arrangements to get to Paris. Mother is going to go with me. I will be in touch.”
When he left my office I sat there shell-shocked. Sophia was dead. I couldn’t focus on anything so I just sat at my desk and stared out the window. A few minutes later I heard a light knock at my door and turned to see Bev there, with bloodshot eyes.
“Come on in Bev.” I found out a few weeks before that she had known Sebastian since he was a teenager and he thought of her as family. She was visibly upset as she sat down in my office.
“The news is awful, just awful.” I handed her a tissue to wipe away her tears. “That poor little boy will have to grow up without his mother.”
“I know, it is awful, just terrible, but the good thing is he has a father who loves him and plenty of other family who love him.”
Bev looked at me with her red eyes. “Yes, I suppose so. Elena, you might think I am crossing the line here but I have to say something. I don’t know where you two stand right now, but he is going to need you now more than ever.”
I was surprised by her words. Did Sebastian tell her about us?
“I will be as helpful as possible Bev.”
She looked at me and furrowed her brow. “I’m talking about being more than helpful Elena. Sebastian will need you. I don’t mean to stick my nose in but I have never seen him behave like this over a woman as long as I have known him. When he talks about you his whole face lights up and I have never seen him so happy. Before this tragedy, I had never seen him as sad as he has been since you called things off.”
I had to stop her because she didn’t know the whole story. “Bev, obviously you know some of what has been going on with us but there’s more and it’s complicated. Things are going to be even more complicated now with what has happened to Sophia.”
She shocked me by reaching across my desk and holding my hands. “I know dear but he will need you, and I can tell that you need him too.”
I was a little taken aback by her words and I normally would have been annoyed that someone was meddling into my personal life, but Bev was a sweet lady and I could tell that she had good intentions. I also knew that it took a lot for her to say what she was saying because she was the type of person who tried to keep things strictly professional while we were at work. So whatever Sebastian had said to her obviously had struck a chord.
“I know you care about Sebastian Bev, I will be there for him.”
It was easier for me to say that than to launch into a long explanation of everything that had been going on with us. And besides, I really was going to be there for him, he was hurting and I hated seeing that.
She smiled at me and patted my hands before standing up. “Good, well I better get back to work. If you need me I will be at my desk.”
I threw myself into work to try and get everything that had happened off of my mind, and it almost worked. A few hours later Sebastian stopped by my office to say goodbye. He had stopped crying and he almost looked like himself again except I could see the sadness in his eyes.
“I am going to pick up my mother and then we are going to take the jet to Paris. Jaden is staying with Sophia’s parents so at least he has family there.” He reached out and caressed my cheek. “I will call you as soon as I have a chance.”
“Okay, I’m here if you need to talk. Have a safe flight.”
Chapter Seventeen – Making Up
Over the next few days I jumped for the phone every time it rang hoping it was Sebastian. Finally, on Friday afternoon, he called me and it was such a relief to hear his voice, he sounded much better
than he did the day he got the news.
“How is Jaden?”
"Kids are really resilient, thank goodness, so he's doing okay. The funeral was yesterday and he cried the whole time but then he crashed for the rest of the afternoon. He misses his mom and I don’t think he quite understands what’s going on, but he knows that his mommy is in heaven now.”
“And you? How are you doing Sebastian?”
“I’m okay, it’s been tough but we’re going to be okay. My mom has been incredible. When we get home I would really like for you to meet her, Elena.”
“I would love to. Do you know when you will be coming home?”
“We will be back in about a month. I have a lot of loose ends to tie up here and I have to get some things in order. Can I see you Wednesday the 23rd for dinner?”
“Yes, of course.”
No more turning him down, no more needing more time. I loved Sebastian and I wanted to be with him. The fact that he had a son would just have to be something that I accepted if I wanted to be with him. He and Jaden were a package deal, one that I was now positive I wanted to accept. I hated to see him hurting and when Bev insinuated that I was the reason that he was hurting so much before the tragedy happened, I couldn’t stand to think of it. I didn’t ever want to be the one who hurt him so deeply.
"I can't wait to see you, Elena." I heard the happiness in his voice and it made me feel good. "Are you doing okay? Are you ready for your court date next month?”
With everything that he had been through that week I was shocked that he remembered my court date.
"Yes, I'm ready. I just want it to be over Sebastian. I want that chapter of my life to close and I'm ready to make a fresh, new start.”
“I know sweetheart. You know I would be there if I could, I hate that I can’t be there for you.”
“It’s okay. We weren’t even really on speaking terms when I found out about it so why would you be there?”
"Just because we weren't speaking regularly would not stop me from being there to support you Elena. I love you and I want to be sure that you will be okay. I’ll be on a plane when you’re in court, and then you’ll probably be sleeping when I land so you’ll have to fill me in on everything that happens when I see you on the 23rd.”
“Okay, I will. Thanks for calling Sebastian, and I just want you to know that I’ve been thinking about you and Jaden and you’re both in my prayers.”
“Thank you, Elena, that means a lot to me. I have missed you so much and I cannot wait to see you next month.”
“Same here.”
When we finished our call I felt like I was on cloud nine. I had not felt so happy in such a long time and even though it was under a really sad circumstances, I was happy that things were getting back to the way they used to be between us.
That night I called Chloe to tell her what had happened.
“Oh my gosh Laney that is so awful! How sad for that little boy!”
“I know Chlo. My heart broke for Sebastian when he found out, I had never seen him like that. It was weird because it was like a light switch was flipped and I suddenly knew that I had to be with him. I didn’t care about any other stuff that had happened between us, I just wanted to be able to make the hurt go away for him.”
“I’m happy you finally came to your senses.”
“Chloe!”
"It's true Laney, I don't know why you were pushing that awesome guy away in the first place. I know that his situation isn't ideal for you but sometimes the right guy is someone unexpected. I really hope you guys are able to work things out because I swear I have never seen you so happy. You seem to be perfect for each other.”
"I don't know about that but I do know that I care about him and I don't want to lose him. I'm going to see him when he gets back next month so I will keep you posted on what’s going on with us. I’ve been talking about me the whole time, how are you and Mike? Did things get any better, is he taking you out more often?”
“Things actually have gotten better and I have to say I’m shocked. He listens to me and he’s really making an effort to make plans. Maybe once you and Sebastian work things out, the four of us can all go out together. What do you think?”
“I think that is an awesome idea. Well, I better go, I still have a little bit of work to do tonight. Do you want to grab dinner Sunday night?”
“Sure, sounds good. I’ll talk to you later.”
After we hung up I worked for a while and then went to bed. As I lay there in the dark I thought about Sebastian and wondered when I would meet Jaden and what that would be like. A bit of fear washed over me as a huge question stuck out in my mind. What if he doesn’t like me? Kids were so unpredictable and I had no idea how I would deal with that if he didn’t like me. I didn’t have a ton of experience with kids so I just had to hope that there wouldn’t be any issues. I tried to focus on Sebastian but meeting Jaden was fast becoming my biggest fear.
***
The month passed quickly, Monday came before I knew it and I could barely concentrate at work that day thinking about seeing Brian in court the next day. The only thing that helped calm me down was Sebastian’s call that afternoon.
“Are you feeling okay about tomorrow?” His voice was filled with concern and I thought it was very sweet of him to call me.
“To be honest, I’m really nervous. It’s hard to believe that I am going to see Brian again tomorrow. I just really hope that the judge doesn’t let him out. What am I going to do if that happens, Sebastian?” I could feel the panic beginning to rise in my throat.
“Calm down sweetie, everything will be okay tomorrow, I promise. You don’t have anything to worry about.”
“I know you said that everything would be okay but I’m still scared, I can’t help it.” I hated that Brian was even still a part of my life. I wished that he would just go away.
“Elena, listen to me. He will never be able to hurt you again.”
We chatted for a few more minutes then said goodbye and I clung to his words the rest of the day. I couldn’t wait until the next day was over.
I think I probably slept for a total of two hours that night and my stomach was in knots as I got ready for court the next morning.
Chloe took the morning off to be there for moral support and I was so thankful to have a friendly familiar face there for me. As soon as I walked into the courtroom I saw Brian, my throat closed up and I had to force myself to breathe. He looked at me, staring with a sinister smirk. A chill ran through me and I shuddered as I looked away and grabbed Chloe’s arm next to me as we walked to our seats.
She quickly turned to look at me. “What’s wrong?”
“Brian is giving me the creeps.”
She glared at him. “Just ignore him, he’s probably terrified and he’s just trying to intimidate you.” She stopped and looked at me before she sat down. “Take a deep breath, you’ll be fine, you can do this.” She smiled at me as she took her seat and then I went to sit with my lawyer.
He quickly went over a couple of last minute things before the judge came in and then before I knew it, it was all over. We were in that courtroom for about two hours and I swear the time flew by in two seconds. I learned a lot about how dangerous Brian really was and after learning what he did I was really happy that he was in custody. He was found guilty and for the first time in a very long time I was able to breathe a long sigh of relief. I didn’t know what his sentence would be yet, but I knew that he would be behind bars while we waited to find out.
Chloe and I did a quick little happy dance in the hall after we walked out of the courtroom and then give each other a huge hug.
"I knew that everything would be okay, Laney! You're not going to have to worry about him ever again; just you wait. I bet the judge is going to give him a really long, harsh sentence.”
“I hope you’re right, I really want to put this nightmare behind me forever.”
“I know I’m right. So, what did your lawyer say when you ask
ed him when Brian would be sentenced?”
“He said it will be a couple of months.”
"Well at least he’s still in prison while we wait to find out how long he'll be put away. I just know that you’re not going to have to worry about him anymore, I can feel it.”
I linked my arm through hers as we walked to my car. “I pray that you’re right.”
We grabbed a quick lunch and then both headed back to work. I quickly called my parents and told them the good news. As I sat at my desk looking out the window, I couldn't wait to tell Sebastian the good news. I was deep into research on my computer when I heard a light knock at my door and looked up to see Bev standing there.
“Do you have a minute?”