He swallowed and stared at her hard, “I’ll help with money, but I-”
“I don’t want your money.” Christie felt her heart break into a million pieces. She didn’t expect anything different, but she had hoped so badly that maybe he would have a change of heart.
Now she knew that it had been a silly hope to carry around. He didn’t care. He wasn’t going to be part of her life and the life of this baby. She snatched up her things and wiped her tears, storming towards the door.
“Christie, wait. I want to help with child support, but I can’t be a dad right now, I can’t be with you.” Every word stung.
“Goodbye.” She could barely form the words, stepping out into the cool air and running towards the elevator.
Ace didn’t chase after her and Christie didn’t look back.
Chapter 10
When Christie ran out of the apartment, Ace didn’t know what to feel. Nothing had been processed yet. His head was just a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that didn’t make sense, and he just couldn’t seem to work them through.
His stomach ached and he felt like he had the air knocked out of him. He stumbled back and sank down into a chair, taking a deep, long breath and trying to work through what Christie had told him. Pregnant. Pregnant with his child.
Ace swallowed and felt something slam into his chest. Panic was the first to hit. He couldn’t have a child. He just couldn’t. He lived a very dangerous life and his job wasn’t safe. He couldn’t give a child a stable life like he had always wanted.
He wasn’t safe to be around. That was why he had pushed Christie away in the first place. Now she was carrying his child and he couldn’t be a part of it. He felt something twist in his heart like a knife. Regret. His thoughts were a mess.
He couldn’t risk hurting this child, or Christie, or messing up their lives, but the heartbroken look on her face had nearly made him die. He didn’t want to miss out on this child’s life. He didn’t want to be pushed out of Christie’s life, but he was bad news for her. He was terrible news and there was nothing he could do to change that.
He had dirty fights lined up and no stable career. He felt like he didn’t deserve to have such a gorgeous woman in his life, and that he certainly didn’t deserve to have a child in his life. Ace swallowed and felt the pull of sickness inside him. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that he’d be missing out, and it wasn't fair to Christie to leave her like this. But it also wasn’t fair to drag her into his mess.
Ace swallowed and slumped onto the sofa. His head was pounding and it felt like stress had become part of his soul. It had worked its way down into the very depths of his heart and taken root there. It was messing up his thoughts and making him jittery.
The big fight was coming up soon, and he wanted no part of it. He didn’t want to fight and cheat like this anymore. He wanted out, now more than ever, but he just couldn’t see a way out that left him with any real future.
He was playing a dangerous game, and he had been playing it from the start. He needed to be ready, he needed a plan, but all he had was a wish and a big pile of regrets, starting with Christie and this child - his child.
Fresh pain blasted his head as Ace stood up. He needed to clear his thoughts, to free up some of the panic in his chest and sort himself out.
He had made his choice. He had decided that he couldn’t be around Christie and the child. He was too dangerous and that was that. Unless he found a way to get out of this job and create a stable life for them, he was better off just paying child support and staying away. It was better for everyone.
Ace packed his gym stuff, trying to ignore that Christie was still on his mind and that everything seemed to smell like her. He grabbed his backpack and headed out of the door, locking the apartment behind him. He had to go. He had to train, and he had to figure his life out.
But one thing was for certain- he was no good for Christie, and he wouldn’t make her suffer for his mistakes.
***
Christie raced home as soon as she could. Her heart was pounding as she stepped off the bus and made her way to her apartment. She slammed and locked the door behind herself as quickly as she could, feeling the shuddering pain make its way through her chest and her heart. She almost collapsed on her bed, trying to calm the raging pain inside her.
Heartbroken. She thought that she understood what that word meant, but she had never before felt it in this way before. She felt pushed aside in a way that she had never felt, and she hated it. She rested on the bed for a few moments, feeling the rise and fall of her emotions.
Then she pushed herself up. She wasn’t going to stay here, lying on her bed in misery, when Ace probably didn’t even care. She needed to get things done, for her own sake and the sake of the baby. It was important that she kept moving forward. It wasn’t the baby’s fault that it was being born to these circumstances, and Christie would do everything she could to improve her situation.
First, she needed to take a shower. She made her way into the bathroom and flicked on the taps, letting the room fill with the warmth of the water. Then she stripped and climbed beneath the spray, feeling it wash everything away. She began to scrub her skin and she washed her hair, washing away all of her regret and the dark feelings that were clouding over her.
She stepped out of the shower and dried off her skin, wrapping up her hair. She rubbed lotion into her skin until it glowed, and took time to make sure she combed her hair and left it shiny and styled. Then she applied some light makeup and perfume and chose a pretty, but professional outfit.
When she looked in the mirror, Christie realized that she didn’t look like a woman who had just gone through a major heartache and who was panicking over how she was supposed to keep her job and support her baby as a single mother. She looked like a young, put-together professional. She took a deep breath and tried to stop the tears from coming again. First, she needed to talk to Jane. She needed someone to talk to, and Jane was the only friend she had.
Next, she needed to get her notes together for the following week about how she would get good information on the story from a few of her contacts. Christie took a deep breath and tried to convince herself that everything was going to be okay, and that her heart was not breaking into a million pieces.
She tried to convince herself that she didn’t need anyone in her life. She grabbed the phone and dialed Jane’s number.
Her friend picked up on the third ring, “Hello?”
“Hi Jane.” Christie smiled, even though her friend could not see her.
“How are you? You raced out of work the other day- I was worried.” Jane sounded genuinely concerned and Christie’s heart flooded with appreciation.
“I’m okay. Do you have time for a coffee?”
“I’d prefer a glass of wine, but I guess so.” There was a teasing lilt to Jane’s voice.
“You free now?” Christie tried.
“Oh, yeah, sure.” Jane sounded surprised, but not put out. Christie knew it was short notice, but she couldn’t help it.
“Thanks. Is the coffee shop near work okay?”
“Yeah, perfect. See you in ten minutes okay?”
“See you.”
When Christie hung up she wasn’t exactly sure if she felt better or not, but it was a step forward.
Just one step at a time and she would be just fine.
Grabbing her purse, Christie stepped out of the door and onto the street.
Chapter 11
The cup was warm in Christie’s hand and she clutched it tightly, trying to focus on something beyond the pain in her chest. She was sitting with Jane at the coffee shop and despite the heaters inside, she felt so cold as if her fingers were about to drop off. She gave a small, apologetic smile.
“Sorry for calling you up at such late notice.”
Jane shrugged, but her eyes were serious, “No problem. What’s going on?”
It was unusual for her friend to be this straight to the point, but Christie found
that she didn’t really mind. She took a deep breath and before she knew it, the words were tumbling from her again in a big rush, “I’m pregnant.”
Jane’s eyes widened, much like Ace’s had, and she opened her mouth to speak. Then she blurted out, “Do you want me to be excited or horrified?”
Christie burst out laughing, the first truly happy sound since the first time Ace had walked out of her life. She smiled and found herself wiping away her own tears, shaking her head, “I don’t know.”
“Oh…” Jane nodded in understanding, “Okay, I understand. Well, honey, I’m here for you.” Jane reached across the table and took Christie’s hand and Christie felt a surge of warmth. Tears prickled at her eyes and she sniffed.
“Thank you.”
Jane nodded, “Hey, hey, it’s okay. Hormones?” She handed Christie a tissue, and Christie took it gratefully and wiped her eyes, “No, assholes.”
Now it was Jane’s turn to laugh and she looked at Christie sympathetically, “The father?”
Christie sniffed again and nodded, “Look, Jane…” Her voice grew hushed, “I mean, this wasn’t exactly planned, and we’d already broken up before I found out, so I didn’t expect him to be over the moon, but…”
Jane nodded slowly and squeezed her hand, “Was he angry?”
Christie sighed, “No. He offered to give me money, but he said he just couldn’t have a child right now.” Pain welled up in Christie’s chest all over again and she buried her face in her hands.
“Shh, shh…It’s okay, honey, it’s okay.” Jane murmured in a low and soothing tone.
“I know. I just…” Christie dropped her hands and looked at Jane honestly, “I’m already struggling to keep this job. I need to be able to support this child and I have to be able to do it alone.”
Jane nodded and a smile came over her face, “Glad to hear you’re keeping the baby , Christie.”
Christie felt an odd sense of warmth within her and she nodded. No matter how hard the other decisions were turning out to be, this was not one of them. She knew from the start that this child would be part of her life.
“I couldn’t have it any other way.” Christie murmured in a soft voice and Jane smiled, “Well then let me be the cool auntie and help with shopping for stuff, okay?”
Christie chucked quietly. It was a small laugh, but it was a laugh none the less, “Of course. I’d love that.”
“Now, let’s get you something to eat. You need to keep your energy levels up. Then we can talk business and try and figure out how to work the story you need, okay?”
Christie smiled and while the heartache in her chest still felt brutal, it was suddenly more manageable now that she had a friend with her.
She nodded and braved a small smile. One step at a time.
Chapter 12
The week of training that lead up to the fight was particularly brutal on Ace. He could feel the strain on his body as he worked himself hard in the gym. If he wasn’t working out, then he was honing his technique.
When he wasn’t working, he was at home trying to get some sleep. He had hoped that, if he worked himself hard enough at the gym, he wouldn’t have to deal with the insomnia that kept creeping up on him. As it turned out, his mind didn’t care how hard he had been working his body- he was in for a rough time whenever his mind turned towards Christie and the baby.
Christie: beautiful, smart, and talented. She was everything that he had ever wanted out of a woman. She seemed to care for him too, at least before he had gone and broke her heart into a million pieces. She was sexy and she had turned his head from the get go. Opinionated and driven, she was a firecracker and she wasn’t afraid to let that show. Ace took a deep breath and slammed his fist into the punching bag.
It sent pain shooting up his arm and he winced and adjusted his technique. It was hard to focus when he kept thinking about her. She was on his mind constantly now, and he kept wondering, over and over again, if he had handled the news about the baby okay. He had made her cry. Could he have done it better?
His mind wondered and his next uppercut to the punching bag connected poorly. He adjusted and focused and landed a good, solid strike. Better. He needed to make this nice and convincing, after all.
“Looking good Ace.” Ace turned to the sound of a voice behind him. There was only one person who dared to interrupt his training and that was the boss. He looked and Cruz and just nodded. Cruz was looking dressed up today and his wealth was practically dripping off him, with the expensive cut of his suit and the shine of the rings on his fingers. Ace tried not to cringe. Cruz might have been very wealthy, but he still managed to look cheap in Ace’s eyes.
Cruz looked at him for a long moment, “I see you’ve been training hard this last week. He shifted his weight and looked at Ace with an intense, unbroken stare.
“Yeah, of course.”
Cruz nodded, “Working out every day, day and night. When you’re not at the gym down here, you’re at the gym in your neighborhood. Always training for the big fight.”
Ace wasn’t surprised that he knew. Word always got back to Cruz, “Of course.” He repeated, “The fights coming up soon.”
Cruz nodded, “Yes, one of the biggest ones in your career. So why the training?”
Ace shrugged, “Making it look convincing, Cruz. Isn’t that what you taught me?”
“Ah. Making it look convincing.” There was danger in Cruz’s eyes as he looked at Ace, “I see. No one will be suspicious that you fought your hardest if they all see you training, hmm?”
Ace shrugged, “Helps gather bets for me to win, right? It can’t hurt.”
“Can’t hurt.” Cruz mused, “No, I don’t suppose it could.”
He tilted his head, “Good work.” Then he smiled crookedly, “Just remember, all of this hard work better not pay off, Ace.”
Ace felt a chill move down his spine and a sudden, furious surge of anger in his chest. Cruz was known for making people pay badly for double crossing him. If Ace messed up, he’d end up with much more than a beating.
Ace shrugged, “I know the deal, Cruz.” He was impressed with how leveled his voice sounded. He was playing a dangerous game here, but he didn’t care. Something was starting to shift inside him. It was like his conversation with Christie had sped up the process that had already been starting within him. And he feared that he had probably lost Christie forever.
Ace wasn’t happy fighting for Cruz. He wasn’t happy and he wasn’t going to let Cruz keep walking all over him. He didn’t have a plan yet. He didn’t know what he was doing. He was tired of being a champion only to be kicked like a dog when it suited his boss. He was sick of holding back, sick of the punches to the guts that left him bruised and bleeding for days, sick of the broken bones because he had to lose a strategic fight.
If he lost this fight, Cruz would get rich, but he’d get almost nothing, and worse, he'd be nothing. He would be on his way down. The fights would get smaller and harder, and meaner. The pay would get smaller and the perks would dwindle until Ace could barely afford to eat. No. That wasn’t the life that Ace wanted to walk. He had pulled himself up and he wasn’t about to lose it all.
With a deep breath, Ace turned back to the punching bag and slammed his hand into the fabric, imagining Cruz’s face beneath his fist. And for the first time, it sunk in that, whether he was going to be part of that child’s life or not, he was about to be a father to that precious child.
He didn’t want to be like his father, a washed out old drunk who had been no good to anybody. He wanted to be a man of integrity, even though Ace wasn’t sure what that meant. He didn’t know much about integrity, honesty and trust, but he knew that he had to learn pretty quickly if he was going to be a good father.
And for some reason that Ace couldn’t quite explain, he wanted that. He wanted to be better. He took a deep breath and settled himself in the knowledge that Cruz had not known anything about the studying he’d been doing online. He didn’t think that had any
thing to do with integrity or trust, but when the insomnia became too bad to manage or deal with and the stress of it all had gotten to his head, he had signed up to a few courses.
He was getting through them faster than he had expected. He was supposedly stupid. That was what his teachers had always told him. Now he found himself working through the course work quickly, quicker than he had expected, and he realized that there might be more out there for him than fighting.
But Ace still needed a plan, and he wasn’t even close to that yet. That was okay. Ace knew his plan would come with time.
Chapter 13
As Christie sat and listened to the man’s story, she felt a sinking feeling of dread in her stomach. She realized, with a dull sense of panic that she had been so focused on chasing the story and keeping her job that she hadn’t really thought about the impact that the story could have on her. Or on the father of her child.
The men that Ace talked about sounded dangerous. They sounded like the kind of men who would have no problem hurting a pregnant woman, just because she brought their story to the papers.
She wanted the story, and she was desperate to keep her job, but she just hadn’t thought about what might happen if she eventually got the story that she had been chasing for so long and published it. She felt anxiety shiver through her like a brutally cold spell.
“Hey lady, you listening? I’m not telling you twice.” He was a surly looking man, skinny and lean, with an edge to his face. He was a friend of a friend of a man she had talked to, and he had seemed very closed off until she had mentioned Ace’s name.
She didn’t like mentioning Ace, even like this, but it was getting her information and that was what counted for her in the end.
“Yes, of course. Please continue.” She smiled pleasantly.
He snorted and continued, “Next fight’s in a few days’ time. It’s a big one too.” He shrugged, “I have no interest anymore, but word gets around when it’s a fight this damn big. Current champ versus a contender.”
PRIZE: An MMA Fighter Secret Baby Romance Page 5