by Ivy Smoak
I tried not to glare at him. First the whole pretend being worried about me thing. And now the lingering touch? Detective Torres was trying to play me. Could he be any more transparent? It was like he was waiting for me to say, "I wouldn't be alone if you joined me." How about you just sign me up for an orange jumpsuit and prison cell tonight. Vomit. I didn't need another stupid guy hitting on me constantly. I already had Noah shirtless and tied to a chair downstairs. That was enough. "Try to find my husband." My tone was icier than I meant for it to be.
He nodded. "Just two more questions for you and I'll be on my way. You have Christmas lights strung outside, but not a single decoration inside. Not even a red and green hand towel. Nothing. Why is that?"
To fool you. "Christmas is the last thing on my mind right now, detective."
"But you still decorated outside?"
"Weeks ago for the silly neighborhood lighting contest." I stared at him for a moment, waiting for him to call me out on my lie. But he didn’t. Such a bad detective. And I doubted Sally would blab that I was decorating just hours ago. It seemed like she had my back. Kind of. "Noah and I always get a real tree closer to Christmas. We like decorating it kind of last minute to really feel that Christmas spirit, you know? Actually, we probably would have gotten it today if he was here." I sniffled.
He nodded and then stepped around me. "Final question before I head back to the precinct. What do you keep down there?" He nodded at the door behind me. "It's a little unusual to have a deadbolt on your basement door."
Keep breathing. Stay calm. I'd had an answer for this all along. And it wasn't even a complete lie. "Just storage. I've always been scared of basements ever since I was a little girl. I had terrible nightmares. I always made Noah go down there for me. Actually, that's probably one of the reasons I haven't decorated too. All the decorations are down there." The words slipped out of me. And as soon as I said them, I knew it was a mistake. A terrible, horrible mistake.
"Well, let me grab them for you real quick," Detective Torres said. He was already walking around me. "I think a little Christmas magic is just what we need right now."
Why? Why on earth would I tell him my Christmas decorations were down there? That my lovely missing husband couldn't grab them for me? That I was basically a damsel in distress when it came to basements? "That's not necessary."
"It's no problem at all. Your house could use a little Christmas cheer, don't you think?" The deadbolt clicked as he turned it.
"Really, Detective Torres. You're already doing so much for me. You don't have to." Don't do it. You'll regret it.
The door squeaked as he opened it. "I don't mind, Ensley." He flicked on the lights.
Fuck. Me. This was it. I was going to have to tase him. But my hand didn't reach for my taser. I remembered the feeling of waking up and believing my hands were covered in blood. The warm sticky feeling on my palms. The way the blood soaked into the wooden steps. The feeling of relief. Maybe it was a premonition. I knew what kind of damage these stairs could do. All I had to do was push him. If I was lucky his skull would crack open. Not only would I get Detective Torres out of my hair, I'd also scare the shit out of Noah. He'd tell me anything I wanted. Kill two birds with one stone. A pretty sick saying for the sick thing I was about to do.
But my body didn't move as Detective Torres took the first step. It was like I was frozen in place. I watched him take another step. And another. My heart was racing too fast. I felt like I was going to faint. And for some reason Baby it's Cold Outside started running through my head at a super slow pace. It almost sounded like the song was skipping on an old record player. The eerie scratching echoing around me, like the song was dying slowly. Detective Torres kept descending the stairs as the rendition of Baby it's Cold Outside haunted my reality. In a few seconds he was too far away for me to push him to his death.
"Cute reindeer," he called from the bottom of the stairs. "Do you want me to bring him up?"
I waited for his reaction to seeing Noah tied up. A scream. A curse. Anything.
And I waited.
And I waited.
"Ensley?" he said. "Did you hear me? Do you want me to bring the reindeer up? What other decorations are down here?"
Snuggle Muffins barked. An actual bark. Not a whimper or a sigh. It was like he was trying to pull me out of my trance. Like he was trying to save me. I shook my head, trying to get the haunting tune out of my head.
What the hell? Why wasn't Detective Torres talking about the fact that I had Noah tied up shirtless to a chair in the middle of my basement? Next to a litter box and a plate of bacon? For a second I considered slamming the door and locking it. But Detective Torres would find a way out. He wasn't tied up like Noah was.
I'd missed my chance at pushing him down the stairs. I had to suck it up and tase his ass. Before I ran out of time. And I was definitely running out of it. He was probably down there radioing the police station this second. Whispering so I couldn't hear him. I couldn't let him get that call through. I needed to end this. Now.
My feet finally started to move. Snuggle Muffins whimpered from behind me when I didn't bring him along for the show. But I didn't want him to see me do this. I didn't want him to look at me like I was a monster too.
I put my hand in my back pocket and gripped the taser. My plan was to tackle him from behind and then tase the side of his neck before he could react. I was ready to jump off the stairs and fly through the air. But when I reached the bottom of the stairs I knew why Detective Torres hadn't said a word about my hostage. It wasn't because he was secretly calling the police station.
No. Detective Torres hadn't said a word because there was nothing to say. The chair that Noah had been tied to was empty.
Chapter 16
Sunday
I blinked. Something must have gone wrong with my brain. A faulty wire somewhere. Maybe something had short-circuited. I blinked again, but the chair was still empty. Noah was nowhere in sight. The chair was also pushed against the wall instead of in the middle of the basement. It looked like it hadn't been used in years. I swore it even looked a little dusty. The plate of bacon was missing. It was like it had never even existed. Even the litter box was pushed to the side. Out of sight, out of mind.
I tried to take a deep, steadying breath, but it felt like I was hyperventilating. There was no way I'd imagined kidnapping Noah and trapping him down here. So...where the hell was he? I glanced at the small window above the shelves. Noah's shoulders were so broad. There was no way he could fit through that. Right?
But I wasn't sure. If he twisted just so it was possible that he could get through. All the boxes on the shelves beneath the window looked untouched, though. If he had struggled to fit through a teensy window, he surely would have wreaked havoc on my organization. No. He was still down here. But where?
I glanced toward the crawl space on the other side of the basement. It was pretty much the only place he could be hiding. But if he was down here, why was he hiding? A detective was literally standing here hoping to find him and help him. This was Noah's chance to be saved. It didn't make any sense. The little hairs on the back of my neck rose and I turned behind me toward the stairs. Snuggle Muffins' was sitting at the top of the stairs staring down at me. He whimpered.
"Ensley?" Detective Torres said.
I turned toward him. The lines on his forehead made it seem like he was concerned. Like he'd been trying to get my attention for a while.
I cleared my throat, but it still sounded shaky. "Yes?" Any second now Noah could jump out and yell, "Save me!" My fate was in his hands. I tried to ignore the empty chair. I hadn't imagined it. I...couldn't have. I wasn't crazy. He was down here somewhere. He had to be. And he was just hiding because he didn't want me to get in trouble? That didn't make any sense either. Maybe he was somewhere else in the house? Had the deadbolt been locked? It had. I know it had. I'd never leave it unlocked.
"Is this the right one?" Detective Torres lifted a plastic storage cont
ainer labeled "Christmas Decorations" from the shelf.
I nodded.
"Great. I got this if you want to grab the reindeer." He shifted the container to one side so he could see me. "Are you okay? It looks like you've seen a ghost."
"Not a ghost.” But I wasn’t sure anymore. I swallowed hard. “I just...it's hard thinking about decorating for Christmas when Noah's out there somewhere." Somewhere loose in my freaking house! "Scared." It all came out as more of a question. And I was pretty sure I was the scared one, not Noah. Because I wasn't sure about any of it anymore. What if... I let my thoughts trail off. I’m not crazy. "I just love him so much." Am I crazy?
"We're going to find him. He'll be home safe before Christmas."
I was going to be long gone before Christmas. And another fruitless promise from Detective Torres wasn't going to change that. But I could feel my own plans crumbling around me. What if I had dreamed of kidnapping him? Just like I imagined his blood covering the steps? The image in my head was so vivid. It felt so real. I picked up the reindeer and hoped Detective Torres wouldn't notice my hands shaking. "I hope you're right."
"What's with the litter box?"
I tried to ignore the fact that it had moved. "I'm litter training Snuggle Muffins."
"Is that even possible?"
"Of course. He's very smart for a dog."
Detective Torres laughed.
I did too. But I didn't know what was funny. I was pretty sure most dogs were idiots. But Snuggle Muffins seemed very intelligent to me. Not that I actually liked him. I looked up the steps again and Snuggle Muffins was still staring at me. He was the reason why I felt like someone was watching me. Which meant...it was very possible that Noah wasn't here. It was possible that he was never here. Noah had called me crazy a few weeks ago when I tried to talk to him about his late nights. He'd said I was "insane." That my "imagination was running wild again."
Detective Torres walked past me and started up the stairs. The odds that Noah was still down here were fairly high. If he'd ever been down here.
Stop. There were no ifs. My husband was wrong. I wasn't crazy. He was down here. He was hiding in the crawl space and not getting help from Detective Torres for God knows what reason. And I had to make sure he didn’t escape.
I retreated after Detective Torres. When I reached the top of the stairs I wanted to slam the door closed and slide the deadbolt back in place. But Detective Torres was standing there with his back pressed against the open door waiting for me.
"After you," I said.
He smiled. "You have to show me where you want these."
"The family room." I waited for him to leave the door, but he didn't. Because he had no idea where the family room was. I'd tried to get him to search it earlier, but he'd been dead set on searching the kitchen. I started walking toward the family room and the hairs on the back of my neck rose again. But I knew it was only Detective Torres behind me. I placed the reindeer down.
"Don't you want to take that outside?" he asked.
No. I didn’t want to leave the house. Because then I'd have to come back in. Noah could move anywhere he pleased if I left the house. But Detective Torres was staring at me expectantly. "Yes."
A floorboard creaked behind me as Detective Torres set down his box. My heartbeat kicked up a notch as I slowly turned around. But it was just Snuggle Muffins walking into the room. He sat down by my feet and almost immediately fell asleep. He was a worthless guard dog. I'd be all on my own when I came back inside.
Detective Torres grabbed the reindeer for me and headed to the front door. It wasn't too late. I could still run back and lock the basement door. But Detective Torres was standing there, waiting patiently for me. Fuck my life. I cringed as I closed the front door behind us. Noah had free rein of the house. He could literally go anywhere. Including out the back door. No, he hadn't gotten help from Detective Torres. But that didn't mean he didn't want to be free. Of course he'd escape. It was done. And I'd never get my answers now.
"Is here good?" Detective Torres asked. He plugged the reindeer into a string of lights when I nodded.
"It's perfect." I wanted to cry. All that planning. All those hours perfecting every single detail. It had all gone up in flames. I could picture Noah running out the back door and into the woods. Gone.
"Let's see the whole display," he said and rubbed his hands together.
I plugged it in and the strings of connected multi-colored lights came to life. A few of my neighbors had already lit up their displays even though the sun hadn't quite set. The multi-colored lights were already jarring against the other cookie-cutter houses' white lights. "Thank you for your help with these," I said. "With everything really."
He smiled. "Of course. And if you happen upon those missing files..."
"I'll take another look. I promise." He'd fake promised me a lot of things too. Now we were even.
"And if you hear anything about Noah or Ben. You let me know."
Of course. But I had nothing to tell him anymore. Noah was probably already running through the woods out back. And every second I stood here, the farther away he got.
Detective Torres shook my hand before climbing into his car. I watched him drive down the street, past all the perfectly manicured lawns and white lights, until he was out of view.
And then I ran. I knew I should have just gotten into my car and driven away. I had an escape plan and I should have already started the process. But Noah didn't remember me. He didn't remember what he had done. He'd ruined every single one of my plans ever since he'd fallen down the bloody stairs. And I wasn't done with him yet. So I didn't run to the garage to drive away. I ran to the back yard and into the woods.
I pulled out my taser as I ducked under a branch. I wanted to call out Noah's name but I didn't dare, just in case I wasn't alone out here. This was the only way for him to escape. Straight through the woods, past the lake, and out to the main road. He didn't know I was hot on his trail though. I could catch up. Maybe.
My feet ached from running in my boots. And my bangs stuck to my forehead with sweat. But I made it to the clearing by the lake in record time. I turned in a circle, staring at the forest all around the lake. But there was nothing out here. Nothing but caution tape, warning you to stay away from the lake.
A snowflake landed on the tip of my nose. I looked up to see the flurries swirling through the air. Snow so close to Christmas always felt special. But today it just felt like a bad omen. Snow meant the temperature was below freezing.
I stared out at the lake as the snow slowly fell. Every inch of that lake had been searched for bodies. A total of three had been pulled out of the cold depths thanks to Detective Torres' failure on his last case. It was the perfect place to hide another one. No one was going to be searching here again anytime soon.
Sinking a dead body into this lake was on my to-do list right after getting my answers. Well, as an option at least. Just in case things went south. It was a great plan. Flawless in every way I thought it through.
There was just one problem. The lake was completely frozen over. I never expected the temperatures to drop so quickly before Christmas. I watched as the snowflakes land on top of the ice in silence.
Actually there were two problems. Not only was the lake frozen, but I'd lost the body that I wanted to hide in the lake. Noah was gone. The snow started to pick up as I stared at the sheet of ice.
Now I'd never get my answers. I'd never figure out if I had what it took to get away with the perfect crime. I thought I'd cry. But instead a scream pierced through the silence. I touched my lips. I wouldn't have even realized it was me screaming if my lips weren't parted. Maybe Noah was right all along. Maybe I was crazy.
Chapter 17
Sunday
I opened the front door as quietly as possible. I knew Noah was gone. He'd just run through the woods faster than me so I couldn't catch up. I knew that. It was the only logical conclusion. But a tiny part of me hoped that I was wrong. What if
he hadn't left? What if he'd hidden in the crawl space to...protect me?
At the same time though, I hoped he had left. Because I was terrified that he was still inside. I'd drugged him. I'd tied him up. I'd gotten him drunk. I'd tried to starve him. I'd tased him while his pants were around his ankles. I'd made him pee in a litter box. I'd pushed him down the stairs. Slipped. He slipped down the stairs.
God, if he was in there, he might try to kill me. If the tables were turned, I'm sure I would try to kill him. I'd think of a million ways to murder him and pick the best one.
Outside was a winter wonderland. Even though the sun had set, there was that strange orange glow in the air that always accompanied snow at night. It was magical. Some of the neighborhood kids were running around their yards catching snowflakes on their tongues. But it wasn't magical for me. Because I was staring into a dark house praying not to be murdered. The children's laughter echoed around me as I pushed the door open farther. Why had I stood at the lake for so long? If I'd hurried back I wouldn't be walking into a dark house.
"Noah?" I whispered.
Silence.
I pulled my taser out and held it in front of me. "Noah?"
Snuggle Muffins barking almost made me scream.
"Jesus, you scared me." I lifted my finger to my lips. "We have to be quiet." I lifted his furry little body and held him in front of me like a shield. I thought his presence might comfort me, but it didn't. Now I was just worried that me and my dog were about to be murdered.
More children's laughter behind me sent a chill down my spine. Get a grip. I stepped into the house and quickly flicked on the lights. I breathed a sigh of relief when the foyer was empty.
"See, it's fine," I said more to myself than Snuggle Muffins. "We're fine." I peered into the living room and held my breath as I flipped on those lights too. Nothing. The room looked remarkably unremarkable like always. But still I found myself whispering, "Noah?"
There was no answer.
If only I wasn’t a criminal, I could have called the cops. Snuggle Muffins whimpered and I realized I was holding him too tightly.